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 loveslilflame
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 3
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An extreme disappointment.Page 1 of 1    
Hey and hello to both that wrote about what you feel. I have an empathy for most of us in here because we are all looking for something special with someone no matter what our lives and daily existence is like.
Young man, i am 55 and believe me, i have had a profile in here for a very long time and have wanted to walk away from finding someone too. But, i live in such a small place that chances of meeting someone in town just doesnt exist and that is why i joined the POF site.
I feel i am normal as normal can be but came through all those ups and downs still believing in people. Accepting what is good or not so good is what we should be doing, and not judging another soul because we dont know what their lives have been like. The old saying goes, you dont know till you have walked a mile in anothers' shoes. It's true.
Hope is what keeps us going, it gives us the energy and inspiration to look for something we need. Need can be many things, and it can also involve needing that special person to share your life with. Faith in the fact that hope is important to our existence is what keeps us from drowning. So whether you stay in the POF site or not isnt important..what is, is that you believe there is more for you ahead, including meeting someone that will feel as you do.
Stand by what you believe..dont let anyone shake you because there are people out there that hurt and have been hurt, and people that cause hurt, and pain..etc..but i always think, i dont have to be anyone else but..me. *smiles*..good luck..to both that wrote..
 MissChik
Joined: 3/9/2009
Msg: 5
An extreme disappointment.
Posted: 4/8/2009 6:51:43 PM
Maybe it's just how I see things, but nowadays 'most' girls/women think they will never find their perfect dream guy. They end up finding someone they are physically attracted to who seems like a decent person, then they try to mold that person into who they are looking for. People shouldn't settle, ever. It may take longer to find that special someone but at least you won't hurt yourself over and over again realizing that you are with the wrong person or that the person you are with is not who you thought. Look for the person who already has everything 'right' and you will find what you are looking for. Take a chance, send out a few messages even if you don't think a person may respond. At least you won't keep thinking about "what if I messaged him" or "what if I'd have messaged her"... you never know who will find you interesting and who you will connect with.

So many people are extremely shallow today... many are here for reasons other than finding their special someone. Most guys are only interested in sex and lack the ability to carry a decent conversation, spell correctly (or even form complete sentences..), use horrible improper english, and are just plain rude/disrespectful. Girls on the other hand tend to be moody, snobby and high maintainance, feeling like this is one big competition on who can attract the most guys to their profile. If most are like me, that's not what I was here to do, not in the least.

I don't pass judgement. If you don't like my profile, that's fine- that just means I've crossed one person off the endless list of male possibilities. If you don't know what you are truly looking for at this point, it is very easy to find out what you are NOT looking for. See who's left standing after you figure it out, they will be the person worth keeping :-)
 engr98
Joined: 2/10/2009
Msg: 7
An extreme disappointment.
Posted: 4/9/2009 9:29:55 PM
That first paragraph you wrote was well put man, good job.

The problem I seem to be having with this site is the old women contacting me and constantly checking out my profile.
I'm 45 and some of the women I have noticed checking out my profile are clearly lieing about their ages. One woman emailed me and also listed me as a favorite, she was listed as 47, yeah, atleast ten years ago maybe!
Another woman (listed as 57) keeps posting these photos of herself like a teenager would, in all different kinds of poses; her latest shows her with her bluejean shorts unbuttoned, it makes me want to throw up everytime I see it, and everytime I check to see who's viewed me her photo is there.

I'm not really taking this site too seriously but it seems what emails I do get are either from these old women, or just out of shape women who have clearly let themselves go.
Give me a break!
 notajock
Joined: 4/8/2009
Msg: 8
An extreme disappointment.
Posted: 4/12/2009 6:44:48 AM
Lucy fur

the way you insult men-i am surprised anyone even talked to you.

you say;
"With a ratio of at least 3:1, how and why is it that a man can be single these days? Well, after my experiences in here you I conclude that these individuals are complete and utter losers or why else would they be single? If they were great catches, they would be caught already. There are plenty of women looking."

what are you really saying about yourself?
there are plenty of men looking
you say;
"There seem to be so many insecure, unaccomplished and damaged men in here. I have been fortunate to have had at least one wonderful and fulfilling long-term relationship with a REAL man, and knowing what I know, and how I want and deserve to be treated, I would rather live and die single, than waste any more time looking through your damaged goods."

did u scare the "real man"-where is he and why are you here in the first place?

if men are damaged,it is because they had a life-if they are uneducated-it is probably because they had to work for a living to buy YOUR toys.

this is my impression of you;

"Boss Lady," a dominant creature who can be
"argumentative, competitive, controlling, not feminine, too independent, not
nurturing or some combination of the above,". A woman who might think her
personality is "persuasive, capable, street-smart, organized, modern, confident
or forthright" -- but a guy thinks of her as a woman he'd rather hire than date.

lacks basic social skills and has difficulty distinguishing between her professional behavior and her personal encounters.

Princesses are women who make men feel like they'll never be able to afford
them, and lack appreciation when the dude picks up the check.

Being a "Park Avenue Princess" sounds like a nice title to have, except when you're looking
for love. Men have an extreme distaste for the money-hungry women of the world,
who also tend to be high maintenance and self-centered.

You might be funny, but your still single.

Ever hear of,"being nice"?
 776877
Joined: 10/13/2007
Msg: 9
An extreme disappointment.
Posted: 4/12/2009 10:59:58 AM
Its not that one sex is soooo much better/deserving than another to be the target of such dislike/hurtfulness but take a read at your post with the gender changed and imagine what kind of 'man' would have written it. Then take a few minutes to ponder why you did, maybe you have been recently hurt or disappointed and as someone with a wee bit of empathy I am more than willing to look beyond the words you wrote and wonder as to why you wrote them.


I too wish you well and encourage a deep journey into self-awareness. :-)



General conclusion:

Wow. All I was looking for was an ongoing healthy dating relationship. Not interested in marriage or children. I am very active and was looking for a fun partner to share FUN experiences. I work professionally, own my home, have a vehicle, and every toy I could want. I am solid and have my act together.

Look around you....there are three or four amazing men for every woman in this world these days. The men are educated, employed and beautiful. What are the women like? Many are uneducated, unemployed or underemployed, have tonnes of baggage i.e. separated with children, live as dependents, and so nasty, jaded, judgmental, weasly and just plain hateful (especially the impression I got from you all in here).

With a ratio of at least 3:1, how and why is it that a woman can be single these days? Well, after my experiences in here you I conclude that these individuals are complete and utter losers or why else would they be single? If they were great catches, they would be caught already. There are plenty of men looking.

There seem to be so many insecure, unaccomplished and damaged women in here. I have been fortunate to have had at least one wonderful and fulfilling long-term relationship with a REAL woman, and knowing what I know, and how I want and deserve to be treated, I would rather live and die single, than waste any more time looking through your damaged goods.

I think the creator had good intent and has developed quite a phenomenon. However, the male clientele is extremely sub-quality. I found similiar sub-quality humans using other venues as well....which is just a testament to the philosophy of the 3:1 ratio.

You girls are products of poor parenting. And yet you continue to perpetuate the cycle by breeding children and then posting your profile in here looking for another man who will put up with your cArp, instead of working through issues with your current family and trying to be a better human being.

I wish you all well and encourage a deep journey into self-awareness.

God bless.
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