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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Saw Films = No?      Home login  
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 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 6
Saw Films = No?Page 1 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
I can't believe that you are making such a big deal out of something like this. Be aware that there are things that men and women share and like, there are things that men and women share because they care about each other and want to be together with their partner, and there are things that men and women do not share.

The problem you have is one of not defining equal boundaries. If she does not want to see those movies because they are whatever, so what, let her. But also tell her that when you are going to watch that type of stuff, that you are going to invite a couple of buddies and have a good time.

My gf likes movies that are kind of strange and that I don't particularly like to watch. When they come on, I give it the benefit of the doubt, but if at some point I don't get it, I tell her and we either change the channel or I go do something else. Same applies when I am watching a race, if she may think it's boring, she can go do something else while I watch my race. So, communicate. Try to find common ground. And accept the differences.
 hellgremlin
Joined: 5/23/2009
Msg: 7
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Saw Films = No?
Posted: 6/22/2009 7:19:38 AM
Chances are, she just can't deal with gratuitous on-screen violence.

Explain it to her like this.

"Honey, you know how you don't like the Saw movies? Do you ever get a nauseated, uncomfortable feeling when watching them; an inexplicable, creeping sensation of otherworldly dread, and just want to turn the TV off? Well, don't worry, because I understand completely now! It's the same feeling I get when I see Ryan Gosling's face!"

It won't let you watch Saw with her, but at least it'll save you from another viewing of The Notebook.
 Kimberish925
Joined: 6/22/2008
Msg: 8
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Saw Films = No?
Posted: 6/22/2009 7:20:35 AM

My favorite movie series is "Saw" and I've seen every movie atleast 4 times, now this is something she won't touch with a 10 foot pole, I don't make that big a deal out of it but I see it as a bit unfair.


Not sure how it's unfair but some people just don't like gore and the Saw series is about as gorey as you can get. So she is a fan of the weaker scarey/gore films, maybe she will work her way up to Saw. if not consider it your "me" time and enjoy it.

Curious...how was the Notebook "shocking" . The only thing shocking about it to me was how that kind of love rarely exists in todays generation and I would be shocked if I actually found that kind of life long passion. Just sayin'....
 cw35
Joined: 4/8/2005
Msg: 9
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Saw Films = No?
Posted: 6/22/2009 7:31:58 AM
Even though I'm a huge fan of the films and watch a ton of horror movies (both bad and good. Sometimes the scariest part is that it's 2 hours you can never get back), I can totally understand where she is coming from. Gritty subject matter presented in a gruesome way can really disturb some people. You should try to be more sensitive to her viewpoint on this one. Some of the things you have to do may annoy you but this may actually traumatize her or give her nightmares which isn't the same thing. You could try easing her into that type of movie with something lighter, (if she is willing) so she isn't so sensitive to it. That's what I did to myself years and years ago when I first started watching horror films. If you can get past the whole fear thing, it's great because there are a lot of very entertaining and well written horror movies out there. Saw is one of the best written series (horror or otherwise) that there is. Looking past the gore, it has the brilliance and style of Hitchcock in my opinion. Maybe Hitchcock with a touch of Poe. lol.
 GeneralizingNow
Joined: 10/10/2007
Msg: 10
Saw Films = No?
Posted: 6/22/2009 9:03:20 AM
Big FAIL on the "I don't wanna, I don't hafta" black and white approach. Grow up a bit.
 packagedealx3
Joined: 2/4/2006
Msg: 12
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Saw Films = No?
Posted: 6/22/2009 9:48:41 AM
Instead of trying to even out the times you spend doing things with each other that you don't like, why don't you expend energy in finding more things you actually both enjoy, duh.

If it is otherwise a good relationship, you have the ability to not do things you don't like and you shouldn't have the ability to demand that she does something she doesn't like. I find it hard to believe she has never done things she wasn't jazzed about because you like them and if you have the scorecards out, you are dooming the relationship.

And here's another thing, you have been arguing about this for four fuking years? I remember when I was in college, we were driving to xmas even service and my parents were griping at each other about something and I was like they have been having this exact same argument for 30 years. No one ever won it but they sure wasted a lot of time, energy and negative feelings beating a dead horse.

If you're not going to dump her over the Saw, get over it and let it go.
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 14
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Saw Films = No?
Posted: 6/22/2009 11:01:57 AM
The Saw movies make me want to puke, it's not that they are scary, they are just badly made and really gory and about things I do not want to think about. Would I watch them with a boyfriend, maybe with my hands over my ears and eyes, but really, it would be better if he did that alone and I had things I like to do alone. Then again one of the deal breakers for me in a relationship is a man who can't do things alone, enjoy them, and not have them put a wedge in our relationship. I don't need to do everything with him, nor do I want him to do everything with me, unless we both enjoy the same things, then great, let's do those things together.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 16
Saw Films = No?
Posted: 6/22/2009 1:53:48 PM
I like the Saw series and own them all on DVD - not sure they should put out a 6th as I think they went too far with the last one, but I digress. However, when it comes to spending time together perhaps you should consider doing only the things that either you have in common, or things you don't but one is willing to do.

You don't have to like every single thing she does, or vice versa. My suggestion is accept that she doesn't like gore/slashers and watch them alone or with friends, and stop doing things with her you don't like as it's obviously causing you to resent her. It's not her fault you're agreeing to that stuff.
 Pitch Blease
Joined: 3/4/2009
Msg: 17
Saw Films = No?
Posted: 6/22/2009 5:05:43 PM

Any advice?


Yes, both of you need to grow up. Ah, the angst of what genre of movie or music to make people compatible. You are 18 and if this is the biggest problem with in your teenage love affair, then I say you are ahead of the curve. Here's an idea, how about having separate lives and go do what you enjoy. Not every couple has to be joined at the hip. When you and the gf get older, you will learn to pick and choose your battles. Is it really worth a debate? When's the wedding? OMG you are going to have to agree on what music to play because that will be more important than anything else!

Don't get me wrong,, I see older people do this too. Must listen to so and so music and like this and that. You know they make ipods so you don't have to force anything on anybody. You can be in your own little world and nobody will be the wiser.

Now I must head over to the other all important question about pubic hair or lack of it for that matter. Movies and pubic hair dilemmas. These are important life decisions.
 Lobo_Corazon
Joined: 2/6/2009
Msg: 19
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Saw Films = No?
Posted: 6/22/2009 10:15:42 PM
I'm with your gf on the Saw series, actually. Saw doesn't really fit the "scary movie" genre, it's kindof uniquely disturbing. The stuff we watch can change who we are.

If my s/o was fixated on Saw, I would wonder why too. I don't know anything about you so I'm not drawing any conclusions about your character - Just telling you I think she has a point.

Comparing shoe shopping to watching good people be corrupted into murderers seems a little sketchy. And as others have already advised - If you don't want to go shopping, don't do it! The relationship isn't going to benefit from you making yourself miserable "because you are trying to force yourself to spend time together".

If you find that you don't have enough common ground to spend time together doing things you both enjoy, I'd say you probably simply aren't right for each other.
 mthomjmark
Joined: 2/27/2008
Msg: 20
Saw Films = No?
Posted: 6/23/2009 12:21:51 AM
my advice is to get some help; first of all it's not healthy to be slaves of the other persons likes; you have to have things in common, but it's healthy to do your own thing sometimes.

Your generation thinks the saw movies are cool and they are nothing less than sadistic torture of innocent people and it's pretty demented.

I suggest you go onto the internet and look at the video of the young woman Neda from Iran on youtube. She was just murdered while walking around in a freedom demonstration. She was shot in the heart and she slowly died right in front of her terrified family.

I've worked in ER's for years; seeing people in agony isn't fun.

I think the saw movies are demented and sick and I worry about anyone that gets off seeing someone suffer; pretty sick; I'm for the woman on this one; 100%

You are only 18 and my sister says men dont' start growing brain cells til 30 so I give you a pass.
 cw35
Joined: 4/8/2005
Msg: 21
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Saw Films = No?
Posted: 6/23/2009 6:41:04 PM
The Game was a great movie. I love movies that aren't really obvious or predictable, that make you really pay attention.
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