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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > What are your messaging ratio's?      Home login  
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 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 4
What are your messaging ratio's?Page 1 of 11    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)
Of course you need to separate the men and the women. Because most women receive messages, while men send messages.

I am off the market but when I was, there was a learning curve. When I first started I had to send about 85 messages for every 1 message I got. I used to think that was horrible, but I was able to procure two dates a week in a consistent basis. Still, after I learn a few things about internet dating, I got it down to 8 messages to every message I got. I still just went out with only one or two a week, but simply became much more picky.

The thing is that I believe that anyone can improve their ratios if only they follow a simple set of guidelines regardless of how attractive they think they may be.
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 5
What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 7/6/2009 11:53:22 AM
I'm not currently marketing myself and I have my profile hidden, but I was probably doing about 1 or 2 in 10 and receiving initial contacts several each week. What I receive now is primarily from friends in the forums.
 JerseyGirl2008
Joined: 12/27/2007
Msg: 9
What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 7/6/2009 12:32:04 PM
I admit I don't usually send messages.

Over the course of my 1.5 years here, I've sent out maybe a total of 7 messages all told. All but one of the 7 recipients were gracious enough to reply.
 Genuine_Gentleman_For_You
Joined: 4/22/2009
Msg: 12
What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 7/6/2009 3:48:58 PM
This is my third time around on POF. And I would guess that the total amount of first contact messages I'd sent is less than 50 (approx.) But that's only because I'm shy about making first contact. And so it takes a lot of courage to do so. And I have to really feel there could be a connection. I just couldn't, and wouldn't, send out hundreds of messages and leaving it all up to probability.

So, has it worked? No! Mostly it's the usual 'Read/Delete', or 'Unread/Delete'. But there were a few, "thank you for your interest. But...". I guess I'm just not a good fisherman. But if I do ever catch a fish, I would cherish her and consider her the greatest and most wonderful little fishy ever caught in this pond. For she would be to me.
 BelleBottomblues
Joined: 3/29/2009
Msg: 13
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What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 7/6/2009 4:20:40 PM
GenCool..... and she would be the luckiest little fishy ever LOL! Don't give up, it'll happen when and how it's meant to happen.....
 qu1nn
Joined: 7/16/2008
Msg: 17
What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 7/6/2009 4:47:41 PM
On this site, 1/10. On another paysite, 8/10... guess where I don't use for meeting women

How ever, as a test, I emailed the same email to 30 women, 15 below 30 and 15 above 40. I got 0/15 from the below 30 crowd, and 15/15 from the above 40 crowd. Of course this test was just to see if I would get a response, not a date. Just some social experimenting on my part.
 Zardoz451
Joined: 3/28/2009
Msg: 18
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What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 7/6/2009 5:54:32 PM
I'm semi-selective in who I send messages to.

I'd say, in my time here, I've messaged about 40 people. A few were just random observations with no intentions of 'dating'. Like; "You have the date Oct 09 on a pic...do you do a lot of time traveling?"

Out of about 40 messages, I've made contact with about 8. Met 3 in person and have carried on conversations with about 5 for a bit.
I use other sites at times.

I have been contacted by about 5 women.

Since switching to 'Friends', I have pretty much stopped sending. I may send a message once a week, if that. But, I was contacted recently by a nice lady seeking friendship.
 Richafir89
Joined: 6/1/2009
Msg: 24
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What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 7/7/2009 7:25:36 AM
Mines probs like 50/1 lmao!

Glad i dont pay for this shit!
 Ottawa_Chicklet
Joined: 8/5/2006
Msg: 26
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What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 7/7/2009 12:47:48 PM
I have initiated contact about 20 times since I have been on PoF, and have gotten a grand total of zero responses. I don't initiate anymore.
 cw35
Joined: 4/8/2005
Msg: 28
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What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 7/8/2009 8:48:09 AM
I've only been the one to make first contact 2 times. I'd say I've gotten about 25 emails from women first. Some have led to dates but most don't seem to want to get a conversation going even though they wrote to me first. Strange.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 32
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What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 7/8/2009 11:00:44 AM
Here? Initiated, zero; received, about 10 so far.

Previously, when actually dating: received well over 1000 initial contacts, initiated about 10.
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 33
What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 7/8/2009 11:39:03 AM

Some have led to dates but most don't seem to want to get a conversation going even though they wrote to me first. Strange.


Strange but true. That happened to me too with women that contacted me. They seem first hot and suddenly they would disappear.
 FitNFriendly83
Joined: 7/5/2009
Msg: 37
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What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 7/8/2009 9:09:06 PM
3 out of messages sent to 9 different users. Considering I've only one pic up, maybe that's not so bad. I don't really like to show off, but maybe a sexier picture or something would help...

Reading the rest of the guys' ratios makes me depressed, is this going to be that hard!?!?

Ditto to previous post, glad I don't pay for this.
 ThinkerGoneMad
Joined: 11/9/2005
Msg: 38
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What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 7/8/2009 11:33:18 PM
I've lost count, but I reply to every message I receive no matter how horrible the email is. Every message I've ever sent out has been replied to. I'm sure I'm well over 100 messages sent and probably ten fold received.
 cw35
Joined: 4/8/2005
Msg: 42
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What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 7/9/2009 8:09:42 AM
Ottawa Chicklet: I can't believe you wouldn't get any responses. That's crazy. You're extremely attractive AND a designer! They must be blind, stupid or both. Don't give up.
 Ottawa_Chicklet
Joined: 8/5/2006
Msg: 45
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What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 7/9/2009 7:34:15 PM

Are you serious???


Yup, though I'm estimating as I don't keep count. I guess the type that I'm mostly attracted to, are not attracted to me. So be it.



Ottawa Chicklet: I can't believe you wouldn't get any responses. That's crazy. You're extremely attractive AND a designer! They must be blind, stupid or both. Don't give up.


Well thank you cw35, very nice of you to say. You're quite attractive yourself. ;-)
I do get a fair amount of interest (that's not initiated by me), so it's not like I'm sitting at home knitting on a Friday night, so I've resorted to solely being pursued.
 zangie
Joined: 5/30/2007
Msg: 51
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What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 7/10/2009 8:35:41 PM
I don't keep count...

Counting how many emails I get would be skewed because I have a lot of forum friends on here...

I think of all the ones I sent to men of a romantic interest, and I have no idea how many it has been, but it hasn't been that many...I only initiate if he really gets my attention..only one became a dating situation, some have become great friends, and all but maybe one or two replied back with a thanks, but no thanks...I keep trying,but, my experience is..it just works better with them contacting me first...they know what they like...I can only guess..

I don't get a lot of romantic interest emails compared to a lot of women on here...but, I think my ratio of getting to a date from the ones I do get is good...though I also have other sources...I haven't counted since the beginning..since last fall...met one guy and we dated till about Feb...still friends , but not dating...since then I have met an average of one or two guys a month...

I think that because men generally on here don't get emails they are more apt to respond when you email them even to decline because they appreciate the effort...
 Gyropants
Joined: 2/10/2009
Msg: 56
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What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 7/11/2009 2:53:29 PM
I'm doing pretty well. :)

Out of about 20 sent messages, I say I've gotten about 13 replies.

I've recieved about 20 messages also and have replied to maybe 10 of them.

Out of all of those, I've been on dates with 4 women from the site. 2 of which turned into "relationships" of some kind. As for now... still on the quest for "the one". Just keep on truckin.

Then again, I'm very selective when initiating contact and will only initiate if I have a strong feeling of compatibility with the person.
 jacob8088
Joined: 9/6/2009
Msg: 58
What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 9/26/2009 7:03:25 PM
I have never sent any messages yet. On the other hand I did receive a few.
 valentino again
Joined: 3/7/2008
Msg: 61
What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 9/26/2009 8:12:39 PM
about 3 weeks..
Started about 20 / response about 7 of them .. 3 of them not read yet.. 4 out of 7 stopped occasionally, still having 3 working out may be to friendship..
Recieved about 5 responded to all of them politly.. (but seemed not my type)..
One more thing .. And almost i'm not actively looking to date right now..
 jacob8088
Joined: 9/6/2009
Msg: 69
What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 9/27/2009 12:21:00 PM
that why women just come by my page and never leave a message? They want me to see that they are interested and to send them a message first. Hmm ok learn something everyday. lol


^^^LOL No shit...its like the traffic is only passing by. For me its mostly 40 to 50 yr. old women. Why?..I have no idea
 jacob8088
Joined: 9/6/2009
Msg: 71
What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 9/27/2009 2:29:47 PM
^^^Putting a wink or icebreaker feature would definitely be a good idea. Which is something they should have done a long time ago.
 barbee1970
Joined: 12/29/2008
Msg: 75
What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 9/28/2009 8:10:22 AM
Ok I have 1 guy who asks me "what's going on" every so often.

Trouble is he does not answer my messages when I reply.
I send 3 to his 1 --3/1 Not all at once but over the time in between his e-mails

I've stated time and time again I don't chase. If he does not show interest or he cannot make time out of his day to respond, I move on.

I'm not doing all of the talking I don't care how much I like someone, sorry.
 friendofcanine
Joined: 3/11/2009
Msg: 76
What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 9/28/2009 8:24:06 AM

Been on here for about two weeks. Have recieved about 4 pages of random email from various women.


4 pages?! Did you say 4 pages? That's an awful lot of eager women waiting for the chance to throw your moving car into park, buddy.
 SleepyMcGee
Joined: 5/16/2008
Msg: 79
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What are your messaging ratio's?
Posted: 9/28/2009 12:06:38 PM
I've sent probably 10 messages and gotten replies to all of them.

I've received about the same.

About 80% of those have turned into MSN contacts. About half of that have turned into dates.

Have only received one (from a complete psychopath) since I changed my profile content to what it currently is.
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