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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > Is honesty really the best policy?      Home login  
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 clasact
Joined: 1/18/2008
Msg: 6
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Is honesty really the best policy?Page 1 of 1    
Don't feel hurt, you didn't do anything wrong to this man.
Sometimes people just don't want to hear, what they don't want to hear. Ya know?

However, his comments were over the top to say the least.

After his reaction did you honestly want to go out with him again?

Think for a moment......he was pouring out that he wanted to move in etc... and you shot him down, albeit nicely, he didn't hear what he wanted to hear. He saw you as relationship material right then and there and you wanting to then friend zone him wasn't exactly what he had in mind.

You didn't do anything wrong.

Edit: "blew it"? I think what this man said was more than just nerves.......
 arwen52
Joined: 3/13/2008
Msg: 7
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Is honesty really the best policy?
Posted: 7/27/2009 6:30:01 PM
You found out exactly what you need to know about this guy. Be grateful he didn't waste more of your time. You don't want someone who talks about moving in, etc., the first time you meet and then gets angry and cuts you off if you tell them to slow down. Consider yourself lucky.
 packagedealx3
Joined: 2/4/2006
Msg: 8
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Is honesty really the best policy?
Posted: 7/27/2009 6:45:26 PM
The man's an ass, count your blessings and carry on guilt free. Anyone who intentionally makes you feel badly, you don't need in your life.
 carelesswhisper00
Joined: 1/11/2007
Msg: 9
Is honesty really the best policy?
Posted: 7/27/2009 7:21:17 PM
I do believe honesty is the best policy. This man didn't sound needy he sounded desperate, no offense to you though. He sounds as though he was rushing into something and probably has done that on several other dates he may have had as well. That would be enough to make anyone uneasy.
 alexbibdel
Joined: 7/24/2009
Msg: 10
Is honesty really the best policy?
Posted: 7/27/2009 11:14:26 PM
I don't know if it's the best policy, but it's definately my favorite policy lol.

I think people should be able to be honest, especially when dating. When someone is honest with me, I take it as a sign of respect. Unfortunately, I don't think most people think that way.
 Happily Ever...maybe
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 15
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Is honesty really the best policy?
Posted: 8/2/2009 4:32:25 PM
You go right on being honest with people OP, don't let someone who couldn't handle a little common sense being sprinkled on his delusions change the person you are. You told him truthfully, and in a way that was honest without being hurtful, how you were feeling. If he couldn't accept that, it's his issue, not yours!
 sunsetsam
Joined: 8/25/2014
Msg: 17
Is honesty really the best policy?
Posted: 9/23/2014 3:11:55 PM
As a result of your honesty you got the guy to reveal a side of him that wasn't so nice so ..... I don't know why you would second guess yourself ?
 NikonGuy007
Joined: 4/1/2012
Msg: 18
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Is honesty really the best policy?
Posted: 9/23/2014 5:45:33 PM
Mad props to you for the way you wrote that you handled it.

However, anybody who knows me, has heard me ask the following question:

"As an adult, when was the last time that you were rewarded for telling 'the truth'/being honest, (but diplomatic)?"

My answer is, "Never".

I am convinced 744%, that (in general), people do NOT want your truthful opinion or 'honesty'. What (most) people want, is to be lied to....................but with conviction AND finesse.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 19
Is honesty really the best policy?
Posted: 9/23/2014 7:07:51 PM
Being upfront with tact is the best policy. That way the other person can know and move on sooner. I know some people will use this example as a reason why they do the disappearing act. However people from both genders have told me that they received rude texts, phone messages, and emails because they didn't respond.
 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 20
Is honesty really the best policy?
Posted: 9/23/2014 8:05:14 PM

What (most) people want, is to be lied to....................


....................but with conviction AND finesse.


The hallmark of every successful politician.


Is honesty really the best policy?


In the ultimate scheme of things, yes.
Unfortunately, as a previous poster commented in his best Jack Nicholson voice,, many are not equipped to handle the truth.
 gingham7
Joined: 7/26/2014
Msg: 21
Is honesty really the best policy?
Posted: 9/23/2014 9:02:16 PM
I'm usually honest when I'm not interested after a few dates. Yes a few men didn't take it well. But the majority of men respected my decision even though they were disappointed.
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