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 curlytop2
Joined: 12/16/2008
Msg: 1
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Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?Page 1 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
Do we try internet dating because we have a particular or even peculiar issue about us that makes it more difficult to find the right person in our everyday life? I read this in an article online about internet dating and it got me thinking.

For me, it's pretty true. I am a Christian yet I am also a progressive politically which living in Texas makes it much more difficult to find a compatible person. I hoped that by going online I could search for men who have more compatiblity in those areas.

Could it be you are older and are looking for much younger girl? Or a guy with a hobby like motorcycles and you are looking for a play partner...but know it is hard to find that interest in most women? Or maybe you have a conservative life but are looking for a wild sex hookup on QT? Or you are middleaged, fat, bald, short, a single parent, socially inept, overly shy, multiply divorced, separated, unemployed...? Anything less than the young, beautiful and successful singles who easily meet potential partners --do we come online to increase our chances of meeting a partner that we aren't able to meet in person because of an issue?

Do you agree with this? What is your issue that makes it harder to meet people in your everyday life?
 Write Time
Joined: 12/29/2008
Msg: 2
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Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 10:49:42 AM
Actually, I meet a ton of people in my everyday life. Not an issue at all.

The internet simply exposes me to people I *don't* meet in my everyday dealings, and who knows what could come of that?

I think I'd have a serious issue if I *didn't* take advantage of this medium!
 rockondon
Joined: 2/21/2007
Msg: 3
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Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 10:53:49 AM
The issue is being single.
 coveredinpaint
Joined: 7/13/2009
Msg: 4
Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 10:58:16 AM
I think a lot of people, men especially, find it easier to meet people online. Going out to the club or the bars and being a shark lurking for prey is so undignifying. Here, you can toss out your line and wait for a bite. You don't have to put yourself out there as much as you do in the real world.
 JohnEDeep
Joined: 7/9/2007
Msg: 5
Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 10:58:21 AM
It's a very simple issue for me, OP...I live FAR from the major population centers of my state, Colorado.

Pickin's are slim up here. Mail-order is looking better every day.
 OnlyThis
Joined: 3/31/2009
Msg: 6
Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 11:02:58 AM

What is your issue that makes it harder to meet people in your everyday life?

Simple.. I work from home and don't go to bars etc so the opportunity to meet women of a profile that interests me is very limited. So here I am and amazingly enough... even here it is tough to find someone.
 IsabelK
Joined: 7/19/2009
Msg: 7
Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 11:04:40 AM
Wonderful people live all over the globe, not only in one's place of residence. The Internet makes it possible to meet some of them.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 8
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Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 11:17:18 AM
I am both slightly introverted and have stringent - perhaps even unusual - criteria. It would be extremely unlikely for me to encounter anyone matching me in the normal course of my life. However, using online dating sites I had no difficulty meeting many women who matched me well, though most lived at least 100 miles away.
 Bookbelle
Joined: 10/24/2008
Msg: 9
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Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 11:19:28 AM

The internet simply exposes me to people I *don't* meet in my everyday dealings.


This basically.
 idoc_steve
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 10
Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 11:32:21 AM
I enjoy internet dating because it's convenient, you can reach out to dozens if not hundreds of potential women without even getting off the couch, and in my case at least it has been quite productive.

I don't have any single guy friends with whom to go out to clubs and bars and that's not really my scene anyway, however a few months back I was out with a married friend and I did meet a woman and dated her a few times but again thats an anomaly for me.
 andithoughtwow
Joined: 7/6/2009
Msg: 11
Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 11:36:41 AM
Or you are middleaged, fat, bald, short, a single parent, socially inept, overly shy, multiply divorced, separated, unemployed...?


That's what it is, but most don't know it/admit it because they are either
erroneously self- confident or lying.

The internet is evil, i'm trying to leave but it is getting stronger
and will soon have us all.
When you are in the mood to say something to a general group
of people then with the internet it's there forever.

Some people are extroverts, but shouldn't be- and the other way around too.
 idoc_steve
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 12
Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 11:41:27 AM

andithoughtwow : Some people are extroverts, but shouldn't be- and the other way around too.


Why shouldn't they be?
 Sabrosura
Joined: 1/7/2009
Msg: 13
Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 11:44:24 AM

Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?


Yes, we are single. lol We use it as ANOTHER option to meeting a potential partner, and to network/play on the forums.
 sashimiboy
Joined: 1/14/2009
Msg: 14
Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 11:45:35 AM
Nah, i meet women in my daily life. This is just another avenue to meet them and nothing more.
 Frau Blücher
Joined: 8/27/2006
Msg: 15
Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 11:52:25 AM
What? Do you think that online dating is The Island of Misfit Toys? I assure you, I am not here because I am a “Charlie” in-the-box” or an elf who wants to be a dentist. I’m here because I don’t like “the bar scene” or similar, “red-nosed reindeer” venues (Bumbles DON'T bounce after they've consumed mass quatities of booze). Additionally, where can you find a larger gathering of people who are single (or who CLAIM to be single )?


We may be different from the rest
Who decides the test
Of what is really best?

We're a couple of misfits
We're a couple of misfits
What's the matter with misfits
That's where we fit in!
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 16
Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 12:05:27 PM
Issue?

It was way too easy.


You go to a bar, scout the room and only see two women worth your time, but one has 10 guys taking numbers and the other one is with someone. So you talk to some chics that are not quite what you want, but for practice you get their numbers and leave it at that.

In the internet you see 100 women worth your time. You start sending e-mails and by the time you have sent messages to 10, 3 have responded and one says yes to a date.

Yeap. Horrible.
 qpid_blue
Joined: 1/24/2009
Msg: 17
Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 12:09:34 PM
i internet date because 1 its easy and from the own comfort of ur home and 2 i find it real easy because gurls are more easy to approach......okay can sumone reply to my thread please
 RushLuv
Joined: 4/16/2009
Msg: 18
Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 12:39:10 PM
Usually when asking questions like these, you'll get the same answers each time.

I'm doing online dating because I'm tired of the bar/club scene.

Too busy to meet in the real world.

My ex cheated on me and I was hoping to find someone decent on here.

My friend told me to try out online dating.

I'm looking to meet new people.


....And the list goes on.

You won't have too many people admitting that the "real" reasons are because they lack social skills, or don't get out much.

Since I'm a student that is still into the club scene, I get my daily dose of meeting new people each day. But being someone who is quite timid, I am one of those people who don't do much talking unless there is a feeling of comfort.
 oblivion77
Joined: 4/11/2009
Msg: 19
Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 12:43:38 PM
Yeah, I have two issues.
One, Mon - Fri my work/commute takes up 11 hours of my day.
Two, I despise clubs and the guys one meets in them.
I don't even like online dating, but I really don't have any other way to meet people.
 andithoughtwow
Joined: 7/6/2009
Msg: 20
Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 12:50:53 PM

andithoughtwow : Some people are extroverts, but shouldn't be- and the other way around too.

Why shouldn't they be?


because they are what i will call "erroneously" extroverted in the fact
that noone really likes them as much as they themselves do. In my opinon
they should be put in more silent positions in the back.

And some introverts like me (read: shy, timid, socially inept, no job)
have been told that we should talk and socialize more, or that "the world needs
more people like you" or at a job in a whispering tone of voice, "We're trying to hire
and keep more people like you."

"Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition"
 idoc_steve
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 21
Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 12:59:31 PM
andithoughtwow : In my opinon
they should be put in more silent positions in the back.


Who is going to put these people in the back and how can we keep them there?


And some introverts like me (read: shy, timid, socially inept, no job)
have been told that we should talk and socialize more, or that "the world needs
more people like you" or at a job in a whispering tone of voice, "We're trying to hire
and keep more people like you."


Why did they whisper this to you during a job interview as compared to saying it in a normal tone of voice? And if they say they want people like you then why do you have no job?
 DemonDingleBerry
Joined: 6/7/2009
Msg: 22
Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 1:01:56 PM

Do we try internet dating because we have a particular or even peculiar issue about us that makes it more difficult to find the right person in our everyday life?

Yes. But that is a very broad and generally meaningless question.


Could it be you are older and are looking for much younger girl?

Nope. I don't like much younger girls. Even when I was a much younger guy. That's not it.


Or a guy with a hobby like motorcycles and you are looking for a play partner...but know it is hard to find that interest in most women?

No. Not looking for a buddy for multi use.


Or maybe you have a conservative life but are looking for a wild sex hookup on QT?

Hmmm...maybe. In the opposite sense. It's really difficult to find someone that doesn't expect me to be looking for a wild sex hookup, so sometimes it's easier to fulfill their expectations in order to get them to like me. But then I get mad at myself for living up (or down) to their stereotypes and know it won't work because I was so manipulated (by her and I), and I am even more mad at myself for being attracted to someone that had those expectations and stereotypes.


Or you are middleaged, fat, bald, short, a single parent, socially inept, overly shy, multiply divorced, separated, unemployed...?

Some of these are pretty vague. And IMO you could probably apply one in some context to about 99% of the human population (at least in the U.S.).


do we come online to increase our chances of meeting a partner that we aren't able to meet in person because of an issue?

I think you are part right. We come online to increase our chances of meeting...someone or thing, for different personal/subjective reasons.


Do you agree with this?

Do I agree that people go online to meet people for different personally perceived reasons? Yes. Wholeheartedly.


What is your issue that makes it harder to meet people in your everyday life?

Laziness? Misanthropy? My personality?


Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?

Yes. And that issue is generally being "single," and/or "lonely."
Not to mention there aren't any "IRL" locations people get together specifically to date, and socialize in a meaningful way with, people they don't know. Especially that aren't solely commercially driven.

So this question would actually have relevance and meaning (IMO) if there were a similar alternative IRL other than going up to random strangers.
 andithoughtwow
Joined: 7/6/2009
Msg: 23
Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 1:31:42 PM

andithoughtwow : In my opinon
they should be put in more silent positions in the back.


Who is going to put these people in the back and how can we keep them there?

The employer.
And if the obnoxious person has problems with moving to a silent
position, then "hire at will" also means "fire at will".
There's too many erroneously self- confident people in people positions
and I for one resent giving them my money.





And some introverts like me (read: shy, timid, socially inept, no job)
have been told that we should talk and socialize more, or that "the world needs
more people like you" or at a job in a whispering tone of voice, "We're trying to hire
and keep more people like you."

Why did they whisper this to you during a job interview as compared to saying it in a normal tone of voice? And if they say they want people like you then why do you have no job?

I already had the job when she whispered that to me. I was saying to her
why do so many people here do drugs, and rise up to good positions?
I told her that everyone should be asked privately if they did drugs, and then everyone should be tested regularly. I told her that it makes life really screwed up for the people
who don't party. I dread coming to work and being with people that are so obnoxiously
stupid and proud of it. Plus you can't trust them.

That's why she whispered is because I was in the minority, we were having a private
conversation at work, and the reason I have no job is because I am currently
on sabbatical and living on the planet, and smelling the flowers and educating myself.
(also, the education is all fun stuff nothing for a career or money)

To the people who are wondering what this has to with the forum thread
i am answering someone from the last few posts. But that's it i'm not an answering machine.

I'm right.
 *buzz*
Joined: 6/1/2006
Msg: 24
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Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 1:39:21 PM
One might call it an issue but for me the internet is a tool to mingle with people across the globe and to see that at the end of the day we are not that different in what we seek, dream about and cherish.

Why not to log in and see what goes around?
 idoc_steve
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 25
Do we internet date because we all have an ISSUE?
Posted: 8/5/2009 1:49:37 PM

andithoughtwow: the reason I have no job is because I am currently
on sabbatical and living on the planet, and smelling the flowers and educating myself.


How are you educating yourself by smelling flowers? Are you going to be a botanist?
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