Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 olympus9922
Joined: 7/20/2009
Msg: 1
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profilePage 1 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
Hello everyone. I wanted to get your input on why so many single moms on this site post pictures of themselves with their children. I don't find anything wrong with it, but was curious if there is a reason behind it. Do they want to weed out any guys that don't like kids right away? Or?

Thanks
Paul
 tass08
Joined: 8/11/2008
Msg: 2
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/11/2009 2:23:31 PM
They're moms first, and women second. They don't know how to interact with people anymore without filtering every interaction through their kids.
 railrunner
Joined: 6/28/2009
Msg: 3
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/11/2009 2:48:01 PM
Never understood it. Best as I knew, that violates site policy, and is potentially dangerous. C'mon, if all the ladies around here are complaining about the sheer number of perverts, then WHY post a pic of your kid? To attract a much more dangerous form of pervert?

Doesn't make sense.
 spitfire6844
Joined: 6/30/2007
Msg: 4
view profile
History
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/11/2009 2:54:32 PM
I agree with railrunner. It doesn't make sense for women to post pics of their kids on the site. It's a foolish form of self-aggrandizement. Fortunately, we're seeing somewhat less of it on the site than there used to be.
 HazelRose
Joined: 6/15/2009
Msg: 5
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/11/2009 3:00:31 PM
Single moms and dads sometimes forget that their kids are of no interest to others because dating sites are not family oriented F a c e b o o k & M Y S P A C E. Like posting a pic with your poodle, it is a trophy of love & pride. Others forget that only perverts take notice, as 1 poster in another forum here found out for herself, "He wanted to only come and see me when my daughter was with me. Should I feel nervous about him, or am I seeing too much into it?"

Just my $0.02
 prurire
Joined: 5/3/2008
Msg: 6
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/11/2009 3:14:17 PM
My guess would be that the general idea around here is that most men don't actually read profiles and instead message people based solely on pics. A picture can say visually that this person is a parent. So yes, a weeding tool, informational tool or just because they want to.

I know I've had men be shocked when I mentioned my children and it is clear as a bell on my profile that I have them.

However, that doesn't explain why so very many single dads do the exact same thing.

So my other guess would be that they are just really happy and proud to be parents.

If you are really interested you could search the gazillion threads that already exist on this subject. :)
 fatgirlsareloyal
Joined: 7/29/2009
Msg: 7
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/11/2009 3:15:50 PM
They are too stupid to know how to crop things out of photos
 HazelRose
Joined: 6/15/2009
Msg: 8
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/11/2009 3:59:56 PM
It is too convenient for people these days to say "they didn't know that there are predators here". People do know and don't care because they believe that nothing bad could ever happen to themselves or their loved ones. I only feel sorry for the child because the reality is that the kid did not ask to be a pin up poster.
 wolftxus
Joined: 2/24/2009
Msg: 9
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/11/2009 4:18:47 PM
One other thought: What you (some women) consider a treasure is what some others call rug rats, snot noses and brats. Don't think for one minute that your 'cute' kids attract men (other than pedophiles). An occasional pic because they are part of your life? Ok. But many pic are right up there with ankle biting dogs in crochet dresses. Deterrants.

Sorry to be so brutal, but I would hold back on the offspring until the partner is more vested - and don't expect him to ooh and aah over your kids. The thing about averages is: most people are. Did I burst your bubble of being the most beautiful, sexiest and most intelligent women with the most adorable offspring that men prefer to raise over their own? Good, then perhaps you are level-headed enough to start a real relationship. Prince Charming is running a few decades late...
 Jadedgurl30
Joined: 8/18/2008
Msg: 10
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/11/2009 7:52:52 PM
my input..my opinion...I am a single mom and would never dream of putting my kids in a pic with me...I think that its enough for someone to know I have children but putting them and their innocence on this site for EVERYONE to see....not ever gonna happen!!

If/When it gets to the point of consistent dating and friednship then ok..THEY may meet my kids..but the world will not.

Scary that some women/men do this...
 Ed1565
Joined: 5/5/2009
Msg: 11
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/11/2009 9:23:13 PM
I agree with you omi -

If you love cars, chances are you'll have a pic of you with one. Same for pets. Or even kids. It's a huge bit of who you are and that picture says a lot more than "Has kids: Yes" ever will. And pervs will always think whatever they want. It's not our place to be ruled by the thoughts of messed up people.
 cindi7777
Joined: 4/17/2008
Msg: 12
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/11/2009 9:47:02 PM
I am not sure why mom's post pictures. The same question can be asked of the men. A large number of men are posting their children's photos. Maybe if they are thinking "my kids are cute what about me" We are not fishing for children.
 .Selena.
Joined: 9/3/2007
Msg: 13
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/12/2009 2:02:11 AM
Some of you sound like paranoid crazy people. The way some are talking we should cut off all television shows with children in them, remove all printed ads with child models and lock our kids up in the house so no one looks at them until they're adults. Get a grip.
 Invictus74
Joined: 7/3/2009
Msg: 14
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/12/2009 3:30:57 AM
OP, you may not find anything wrong, bit I'm really bothered by this.

I really am. I think that just saying you have kids and stating how many in the profile is enough for now. You absolutely do not need to put your kids out there on any dating site with your own pictures. It's creepy definitely. It's a little naive at best. It's borderline exploitative at worst. I question any parents sanity and maybe their parenting skills having pics of their kids on a dating site.

A potential suitor has to know their prospect FIRST. Pictures of how they interact with their children is not something that needs to be broadcast right up front.

Ladies and Gentlemen. Take those pictures of your kids down. They don't belong here.
 daydreamer57
Joined: 4/12/2009
Msg: 15
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/12/2009 4:48:46 AM
Other than being proud of their children...Im not sure why they do it...wouldnt want anyone seeing mine bfore I knew who I was connecting with....I work in an environment where I see many creeps and people that would harm children.....its not the safe world that some like to think it is................
 short_momma
Joined: 9/23/2007
Msg: 16
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/12/2009 4:56:03 AM
Though I am single person with children I mention it on this site only because I want to be sure any potential date would know my children pretty much always come first but would never post pictures of my children. This is an adult site and in my opinion should only have pictures of adults. I do have pictures of my family on sites like facebook or myspace. Those are places I chat with friends and family and am not looking for a potential date.
 dbguy79
Joined: 5/7/2009
Msg: 17
view profile
History
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/12/2009 2:06:59 PM
I'm sure the single moms can be just as clueless as me. If I see a woman is a mom it's like 2.5 strikes right away but I might keep looking and I've found myself wonder "why is there no pic of her kid with her."
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 18
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/12/2009 2:17:18 PM
predators do not need a picture to find a victim with children, all they have to do is read a profile to learn who does or who does not have children.

Yep. Finally someone addresses the fear-factor with common sense. Thank you.

~OT~ When the net was new, online dating for me was a really weird, new, and foreign thing (10 years ago now) I had a picture of me and my teenaged son on a profile. Until the day he came home and said that his buddy's father was "hawkin" me and asking him all sorts of personal questions about me, my life, the divorce, if I was dating, etc. He knew my son, had never seen or met me and so he took it upon himself to drill my 13 year old. That was when I realized the reality: unless someone is old enough to legally consent and/or give permission, it's a terrible violation of their privacy to post photos containing their image. Meaning? At least put blue dots over their faces if you MUST post such things. Give them their privacy. JMO
 KittenWithAQuip
Joined: 7/29/2009
Msg: 19
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/12/2009 2:46:33 PM
NO WAY! Unless it's something like Facebook, where only your known friends and family can see them, posting pictures of your kids on the Internet is a majorly bad move in any venue. Furthermore, posting kid pics on an adult dating site is WAY inappropriate! I would not even consider dating a man who posts photos of his kids. Aside from the obvious dangers, I know a lot of people who use their kids as marketing tools to sell themselves. The message often is, "Oh, look what a gentle, sensitive guy I am!" Then you find out that they ignored their kids when they were married. I once made the mistake of dating a guy who sent me a picture of himself with his young kids, and he later used the kids as an excuse to avoid getting involved in a relationship. (SURPRISE! He totally ignored his kids--as well as his wife--when he was married. Then, after his wife dumped his a**, he magically became Father of the Year. PUH-LEEZE!) Once again, I say NO FRIGGIN" WAY!
 english lass
Joined: 11/14/2007
Msg: 20
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/12/2009 2:50:10 PM
they post pictures to share who they are and what's important in their lives

some post pictures of fish and cars and some of their children

it's all a little taste of what makes them *them*
 KittenWithAQuip
Joined: 7/29/2009
Msg: 21
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/12/2009 2:56:41 PM
So you're comparing kids to fish and cars?!
 english lass
Joined: 11/14/2007
Msg: 22
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/12/2009 3:00:52 PM
kinda wiggly and quick?

sounds about right to me...



i agree with this post to a degree:


The way some are talking we should cut off all television shows with children in them, remove all printed ads with child models and lock our kids up in the house so no one looks at them until they're adults.


and i used to post pictures on myspace of my kids... however, i got to thinking that i wouldn't like someone posting a bunch of photos of me without my permission, so decided not to do that any longer

plus, people who are looking to date are looking to date adults, not their kids (hopefully) so it makes sense for people to put pictures of just themselves up...

however, even though i can understand both 'sides' of the debate... i still don't have a problem with someone putting up a picture of them with a child, if the child is fully clothed and appropriate of course - it's just sharing a part of the parent's lives, as i said

 Ifeellucky
Joined: 4/12/2009
Msg: 23
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/12/2009 3:50:43 PM
I have them up because they are part of my life, the most important part, and also, the latest pictures I have are with them.... I am sure you don't want to see the ones with me and someone I date.
 Ifeellucky
Joined: 4/12/2009
Msg: 24
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/12/2009 3:53:47 PM

NO WAY! Unless it's something like Facebook, where only your known friends
you have not and probably will not have children in your life, so you really aren't qualified to blab your opinion....when your a good mom, and have invested your life in children, and the joy they bring, then...open your trap and I will listen, until then
stfu
 KittenWithAQuip
Joined: 7/29/2009
Msg: 25
Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile
Posted: 8/12/2009 5:58:27 PM
I am now sitting here with a friend who just came to visit, who is a former police psychologist and has had a lot of contact with sex offenders, predators and other deviant personality types. (He's also the parent of two school-aged kids.) I showed him this thread and he was livid. He asked me to write this on his behalf:
"Anyone who posts pictures of young kids, be they your kids, grandkids, nieces, nephews or the kid from down the street on an online dating site needs their goddamned head examined! This is highly exploitive, and downright dangerous. Even if these kids aren't in any imminent physical danger, do you want some pervert whacking off to a photo of them? Hate to be so crude, but this happens all the time. So I implore those who do this to knock it off, ASAP!"
Uh, I think he probably knows a little more about the subject than the rest of us on here!
Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > Single moms and pictures of their kids on profile