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 benspurr
Joined: 5/7/2009
Msg: 2
A question about Oral sexPage 1 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
I also heavily dislike oral, giving and receiving. I don't get any pleasure from it whatsoever.

I've had people tell me I must have received some pretty crappy BJs if I don't like 'em, but 4/4 girls can't all be so terrible. Sorry but... oral sex isn't pleasurable. I don't find it disgusting, just not pleasurable.
 jojoaus
Joined: 10/28/2007
Msg: 3
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A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 4:01:05 AM
OP.. what does hwoch mean???? Is that on or off topic?? BTW.. i love giving oral, less keen on getting tho it can get me to orgasm. Having my guy cum from oral??? A great gift IMO
 ~$Brittney$~
Joined: 9/15/2005
Msg: 4
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 4:26:42 AM
I think oral is amazing both ways..I mean I could care less on recieving it but that look my man gives me when he's about to cum...Nothing beats that!..but then again I gots Skillz...
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 6
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A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 4:50:50 AM
I think describing a healthy sexual act as "gross".......is indicitive of some deeper issues.
Not getting much out of it is one thing.....but thinking it's "gross" to pleasure your partner......or have your partner pleasure you......would be a huge red flag for me when it comes to a partner.
 allthatglittersisnotgold
Joined: 1/3/2009
Msg: 7
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 5:09:35 AM
Believe it or not this is a natural act between two people. Religion has made it out to be gross.Most people in the throws of passion would do oral. It is a preconceived notion put into your head as a young one that it is gross. I remember dating back when I first was dating in my late teens and was asked to perform oral. I was thinking ewwwwww but then again I was raised religous and eventually I enjoyed it. For me to be natural with lovemaking, this is definately one act that I will always want to do. I personally get very turned on giving and receiving. Receiving from a talented man not a man who is learning and can't figure out what to do and even after being told still can't do oral right. I think you have been told too many times it is nasty and your brain cannot get that out of your head. Trust me ...it is sooo wonderful when you relax and do what comes NATURALLY. I would like to hear what you think about it in 20 years.
 gourmetchef2009
Joined: 7/9/2009
Msg: 8
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 5:11:16 AM
defintely the Op has some issues..At only 20-something, i'm not sure how many 'experiences' she has had..especially since her profile states: "I'm waiting on marriage before i get 'busy'"-inferring that she'll be a virgin?/
My ex-wife had similar views as the Op before we got married..needless to say she just wanted to 'phuk' and be done. Believe me when i tell you..going down is not a performance..i enjoy it more than intercourse itself!!
 Closer2U
Joined: 2/19/2009
Msg: 9
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 5:57:28 AM
I really think Oral sex is gross. I have had guys go down on me and I don't like it. I mean if you really like someone I think there will be natural passion and no need for all the performances. I just think it's nasty both ways guys doing it and girls.


HEY WAIT A MINUTE HERE! I thought you were waiting!??????


I am Christian and I am waiting. I don't see the big deal either way. I mean sleeping with someone is great but waiting and having a blessed marriage is well worth it to me.I am waiting. And I respect you for not being like eveyone else. I hope someday to find a man that has your convictions..........


ORAL SEX IS SEX TOO.....what are you waiting for if you have had sex?

UH OH.....your convictions went right out the door just long enough to think Oral sex is GROSS? You seems to have a few issues with sex in general.
I guess "god" approves of oral sex before marriage then?

Oh ok.He must know what he's talking about because ORAL SEX IS THE BOMB!

YUMMY YUM YUM!~

I think describing a healthy sexual act as "gross".......is indicitive of some deeper issues.Not getting much out of it is one thing.....but thinking it's "gross" to pleasure your partner......or have your partner pleasure you......would be a huge red flag for me when it comes to a partner.


Can you say..................dysfunction?

 Rustmouse2000
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 10
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 6:06:34 AM
Uhm, yeah - I have to agree... oral sex is the bomb! (Though I'm living proof there is such a thing as a bad blowjob, and I have the scar to prove it!)

As far as the OP goes, eh, there's all stripes of people, and if it doesn't float your boat, it's not like they're peeing on the Pope or something, it's just a different point of view on the matter.

I think, though, it's unfair for her to characterize it without having been there - the OP wishes to hold out till marriage, and at that point, she may very change her mind about it. There's a huge difference between the attitudes you have towards sex when you haven't had any and the attitude you have towards sex once you're in a committed relationship. (kinda like attitudes about kids before having them and after having your own)

I suggest keeping an open mind, 'cause once you've been having sex for a while, you might change your mind and give it a try...
 Pollyhfx
Joined: 7/11/2009
Msg: 11
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 6:19:51 AM
Oral Sex gross??? Hmm got me there, the only time I would see it as gross is if they werent fresh and clean or covered in hair.

I personally love Oral sex giving and recieving... Yeah for me!!
 WalkingInLondon
Joined: 2/21/2005
Msg: 12
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 6:34:19 AM
Dear OP,
I am not trying to be offensive in any way, but do you have perhaps some problems with your own sexuality or issues with your body? Why would you think that oral sex is gross? Do you find your private parts to be gross or unattractive? What about the male genitalia? How do you feel about that?
Oral sex is usually an expression of love and attraction towards your partner. When you feel attracted to someone, you want to give AND recieve pleasure, and many times that means orally as well as through intercourse. In fact, most women can't orgasm through vaginal stimulation alone... it takes clitoral stimulation as well.
Please seek counseling regarding your sexual issues. By limiting yourself, you are denying yourself and your partner a lot of enjoyment. Don't wait around, get some advice and help now, and when you do find a partner, you will be able to open yourself up fully to him.
Beth
 MGoBlue4U
Joined: 5/19/2009
Msg: 13
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 6:51:36 AM
Oral done properly is the best sex there is for both sexes. Why? Control. There is so much you can do to customize the type of and amount of stimulation in order to maximize sensation for your partner.

Work through it -- you're missing out big time!
 sassysingle29033
Joined: 8/3/2009
Msg: 14
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 6:59:51 AM
It's possible you just haven't had the right person provide that for you, but it's also possible that it's just something you plain don't like. I think as long as you have a healthy (read: open and honest) sexual relationship with your partner in every other way, it's up to personal taste as to what you actually choose to do and not to do.

In other words, if you're happy without it and your partner doesn't have a problem with that, then it's really nobody's business but yours.
 justwant2no
Joined: 11/14/2007
Msg: 15
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 7:23:19 AM
It seems, OP, that your religious upbringing may have skewed your thinking in terms of sex. I hope, for your sake, that once you find 'the one' and stop 'waiting' (although, for the record, oral sex is sex too - it's the act, not the hymen that determines virginity) you can develop a healthy attitude toward sex.
 whatthefluc
Joined: 4/17/2009
Msg: 16
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 7:24:47 AM
how did oral sex start ? Hmmm that is a good question .I'm sure someone can nail it ..lol
You can also ask who was the first to eat a raw oyster.

Mainly I think if anything doesn't have a bad smell or flies buzzing around it people are willing to put it in their mouths to see what happens .
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 17
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A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 7:30:19 AM
Where did it start? Well, probably it's a natural impulse. Some primates engage in oral sex, particularly bonobos, so it's not a human invention or unique to humans. For those who enjoy it and don't have hangups about it, it's among the more enjoyable of sexual experiences.
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 18
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 7:52:17 AM
OP aren't you supposed to be a virgin? Waiting to walk the marriage hallways before you become "deflowered"?

What are you doing experimenting? Are you developing these temptations? Have you practiced with some guy?

Like someone else said, you have some deeper issues.
 Pollyhfx
Joined: 7/11/2009
Msg: 20
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 8:10:29 AM
Outdoorgirlsunshine you crack me up No I did not have sexual relations with Monica whatever her name was
 LovinLife_01
Joined: 4/1/2009
Msg: 21
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 8:25:23 AM
Op, I am a firm believer in "to each their own", and genuinely hope I do not come off as belittling you in anyway.

But......I do agree with "MsMicki" on this:


I think describing a healthy sexual act as "gross".......is indicitive of some deeper issues


And with this:


why have the parts and bits if they're not to be fully enjoyed?


With that said: I was raised in a VERY religious home, and if it was not for friends, and yes, those "trashy" romance books, I would have known basically NOTHING beyond the “how babies are made" talk. Thank goodness, I did listen, read and learn....for it is the ultimate intimate physical act (IMO) that two people can gift to each other. So, it is hard for me to wrap my brain around the possibility there are some who might find that "act" repulsive or gross.

While I have indeed had "fantastic" oral, I have also had, maybe.... not so good too....but at the end of the day or night (lol)....I still enjoyed, and the effort was appreciated! I can't imagine NOT enjoying receiving or giving!

As far as where "oral" started? Can't say for sure, but my guess would be....it comes natural in the human desire to please, and to be pleased even while mating.
 Okietokie88
Joined: 12/8/2008
Msg: 22
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A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 8:25:31 AM
I agree with Outdoorgirlsunshine my President said it's not sex so damn'it it's not oral sex...I don't particularly lke receiving oral sex, but I love giving. I could do it all day, I tried once but that basically drove her wild and she said it actually began to "hurt" after about an hour an a half of oral...idk thank you
 spider43 2.0
Joined: 8/3/2009
Msg: 23
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 9:10:35 AM
The concept of oral sex has been around for a very long time.
In older cultures depictions of sexual positions are not rare.
Kama sutra comes to mind as well as ancient chinese drawings, the pleasure of giving and recieving isn't just a christmas concept.
Deal breaker for me if there is none.
 n33dsomelove33
Joined: 5/20/2008
Msg: 24
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 10:34:10 AM
It depends on the person whom you share it with.

If a women enjoys receiving, then of course I enjoy giving. And vice versa.

It is really the same as anything else. When it something my partner enjoys - then it brings me pleasure to be able to give it to them. If it is not something they enjoy, than It is not required.

The whole physical part of a relationship, and sex in general, SHOULD be an extension of the passion, feelings and bond that exists in the relationship itself. It should not BE the relationship - and therefore not receiving, ot being allowed to give oral or any other act should be a deal-breaker.

IMHO.
 n33dsomelove33
Joined: 5/20/2008
Msg: 25
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 10:34:51 AM
I meant should NOT be a deal breaker.
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 26
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 10:56:27 AM
I really think Oral sex is gross. I have had guys go down on me and I don't like it. I mean if you really like someone I think there will be natural passion and no need for all the performances.

If you don't like it, don't do it. But, don't complain if guys won't date you because of it. I would not date a woman who did not like oral sex (and I mean like it, not merely tolerate it.) If there was a ``natural passion,'' oral sex would be part of it.

I meant should NOT be a deal breaker.

Not only would it be a deal breaker, I'd probably put my clothes back on and say goodnight. A woman who doesn't like oral sex is way too inhibited for me.

BJs if I don't like 'em, but 4/4 girls can't all be so terrible.

Yes, they can.
 n33dsomelove33
Joined: 5/20/2008
Msg: 27
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 11:40:32 AM

A woman who doesn't like oral sex is way too inhibited for me.


Because they do not like it does not mean they are too inhibited. It means they have preferences. You prefer have oral sex as part of the experience - they prefer not too.

It is obvious you disagree with me, and I am sure there are others that will also - but I simply feel that not respecting another persons boundaries/choices or preferences is immature and quite frankly rude.
 no_1_bby
Joined: 5/3/2006
Msg: 28
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A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 11:53:28 AM

but 4/4 girls can't all be so terrible


Sure they can. Not everyone is a gifted giver. Takes time to hone those skills you know.

If the op is Christian and waiting until marriage to have PIV sex, then that does explain a whole lot about the body image and idea that oral is gross. I know many Christians who feel anything outside of missionary is evil.

When there are hygiene issues, yes.. it IS gross. There are ways around this tho. Don't write it off just yet... keep an open mind to it in the future. Things can and will change... I know this from experience.
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