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Joined: 4/28/2008
Msg: 1
BUSTED! LMAOPage 1 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
I was hoping that I would escape what all of us ladies dread -- being contacted by someone posing as divorced, but here goes. I was contacted by someone who read my profile. He presented himself as being divorced, single father, etc. We exchanged a few e-mails and he said he was going to call me. So the last e-mail was written not by him, but his WIFE. She told me the douche bag was married to her. She added her phone number if I wanted to call her. So I couldn't resist the temptation to set the record straight as she had actually seen his POF e-mails to me.

Here's what it came down to:

1. Not only did he misrepresent his marital status, he lied about his age. His profile read 48, but he's really 53.

2. He doesn't have a car of his own, but instead drives hers to work. His car was repo'd.

3. He has a kid which he mentioned that he sees every other weekend. That's a lie, too. He does not see the kid.

4. She has been to this ass for 7 years.

The wife wasn't blaming me, but him. She claims they are in marriage counseling for this type of thing as he has told her that lying to women on the internet is a "game" to him because women do it, too. This ass was home asleep at the time when I was talking to her as she was talking very low and in fact he must've walked into the room at the time that she on the phone with me. Damn, his ears must've been burning. Since I didn't have a lot of time to waste on this, I thanked her for the information and said I had to go.

So I guess it just goes to show that while you want to take people at their word about their marital status and everything else, you really have to take it with a grain of salt until it's proven true. It's sad that men like this jerk think it's ok to play games with women on a dating site by pretending they are something they're not. He makes it hard for the truly honest guy. Even though this guy got busted by his wife this time and several times before, I'll bet he'll be back again under a different disguise because he doesn't think there's anything wrong with what he's doing. Now, my question is would you stay with someone who is that dishonest? She claims they have a "happy marriage". How happy can one be if you have to chase your spouse around the internet to see if he's on dating sites, having to use a key logger to find out his passwords and where he has been on the internet. No doubt he has met up with some of the women he has been playing. Otherwise why keep playing the "game" as he called it. I know, if it was me, all his sh*t would be out on the front lawn. A nice bonfire going. Oops! Can't do that. I live in the land of brush fires. You get what I mean.
 Ghost Reader
Joined: 9/12/2009
Msg: 2
Posted: 10/11/2009 9:48:31 AM
Damn ! I KNEW when Al Gore "Invented" the internet, "Bill " would use it !!...
Joined: 4/24/2008
Msg: 3
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Posted: 10/11/2009 9:57:42 AM
I would imagine every women has to make that choice for herself. It seems she married the guy for some reason and they are going through marrage couciling so there must be some redeming qualities. Hell if I can tell but you cant be too critical because after all there was something that attracted you to the guy afterall other wise you wouldnt have been texting back and forth.
Joined: 4/24/2008
Msg: 4
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Posted: 10/11/2009 10:01:59 AM
Many of the girls I dated lied to me, and they were ligitametly single. So be thankful that someone else is stuck with the lier
 Lint Spotter
Joined: 8/27/2009
Msg: 5
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Posted: 10/11/2009 10:02:17 AM

I know, if it was me, all his sh*t would be out on the front lawn. A nice bonfire going.
I don't see the point in being vindictive. What's wrong with simply walking away from the relationship without all the fan fare?

I had a best friend that had an ex go through all the psychotic motions similar to this and all he could do was laugh after the fact when they were finally split up. After he and I split up due to an incident and I walked away with my pride intact, I'd heard even years later how he felt poorly at our split and he would have moved heaven and earth to have not performed the action that had me leaving.

Revenge is a dish best served with decorum...
Joined: 8/15/2009
Msg: 6
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Posted: 10/11/2009 10:24:51 AM
Drama, drama, drama.

People play all kinds of games. For instance, how do you even know that it was really his wife? It could be a psycho ex wife, a scorned ex lover, a crazy sister in law, etc.

The only thing this really shows is that people love drama so much that they willingly immerse themselves in it because temptation is just so hard to resist. No thank you.
Joined: 4/28/2008
Msg: 7
Posted: 10/11/2009 10:52:50 AM

don't see the point in being vindictive. What's wrong with simply walking away from the relationship without all the fan fare?

Yeah, that's true. No, I wouldn't burn them, but I would throw him out of the house. I wouldn't be the one to leave because he's the one that's cheating. Let him find another place to live. I really don't want the cops and fire dept. knocking on my door. In a 7 year marriage with a cheater is not worth staying in.
Joined: 4/28/2008
Msg: 8
Posted: 10/11/2009 10:57:38 AM

People play all kinds of games. For instance, how do you even know that it was really his wife? It could be a psycho ex wife, a scorned ex lover, a crazy sister in law, etc.

Chances are 99.9% that it was his wife. Spouses find this kind of thing out all the time. I find it highly unlikely it was someone like an ex hacked into account.
Joined: 9/13/2009
Msg: 9
Posted: 10/11/2009 12:15:28 PM
That is why I say I am very happily divorced.

I too had to use surviellence software on my computer to find out what my ex hubby was doing, on top of the cheating with women he knew from work. I took some time to think of what I wanted to do, what kind of marriage I would have for years, and what kind of person he was turning me into.

So I ended it, got the divorce and 9 yrs later, I am thankful I made that decision. I did not want to become one of those nagging, b**ing wives, who always would follow them around, check their phones, emails, fighting all the time and him making me feel less of a woman and inseucre because of his actions.

Then I had a long term relationship for 6 yrs, and well the software was still on my computer, and lo and behold, I checked it one day....well, after I found out he placed an add on a adult dating site, I joined and we talked for a couple of months, then it was time to meet.....then it was time for him to move out.

He apologized to me a while later, and my response was, don't be sorry, if you didn't do what you did, I would not of had the fwb I had, and the group of friends I have, that have turned out to be my best friends, so thank you, no need to be sorry, you are just sorry you got caught and realized what it was you actually had and want it back but you can't have it back, you had your chance.

What I say to my friends, if you have to check up on him by any means, why are you letting him turn you into that kind of woman and treat you that way?

If a man or woman brings our your insecurities and jealousy out by their actions, why are you still with them? they are bringing the worst out in you and not the best, you deserve better.
 christ on a crutch
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 10
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Posted: 10/11/2009 12:39:27 PM

His profile read 48, but he's really 53

the worst transgression of all. anyone who does this should be shot.
Joined: 10/22/2007
Msg: 11
Posted: 10/11/2009 12:42:35 PM

I know, if it was me, all his sh*t would be out on the front lawn. A nice bonfire going.

- What a wonderful example of womanhood you are. Sounds like you were meant for each other!
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 12
Posted: 10/11/2009 12:46:21 PM

She added her phone number if I wanted to call her. So I couldn't resist the temptation ...

OP, grow up!!
Joined: 2/23/2009
Msg: 13
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Posted: 10/11/2009 2:49:57 PM

The only reason there are ***holes like this is because there are stupid women to accept it!

You beat me to typing those very same words, however, I would have used
"People" instead of "woman" because it works both ways!
Joined: 7/24/2009
Msg: 14
Posted: 10/11/2009 3:18:20 PM
Obviously the guy has figured out that his wife is very "accomodating" towards this type of behavior I doubt he will change anytime soon.
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 15
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Posted: 10/11/2009 3:33:46 PM
I just want to say, for the record, IT WAS NOT ME!!!!
Also, my condolences, and congratulations, for the time you lost with him, and for finding out in time not to lose much more.
As for her staying with him, I don't think it's worth your time to wonder, but I've seen worse behavior be tolerated in a marriage. Since there's nothing I can do about her mess, and it isn't spilling into mine, it's not my concern.
Joined: 12/29/2008
Msg: 16
Posted: 10/11/2009 3:43:35 PM
It happenes, that's why I think we really get to know the person. If they are secretive about where they live or can't find time to see you regularly, they could be with another woman.

The only thing with phone numbers, is I suspect jealous ex's or pshycos could make an accusation that he's married.

I am still tying to find out what woman claims I am in her husband's phone but unfortunately I keep getting a dead end. Could be she's using prepaid. As far as I know I am not with a married man, but never know. I want to ask who the "husband" is.
Joined: 8/26/2009
Msg: 17
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Posted: 10/11/2009 3:55:03 PM
I was talking to a "woman" that supposedly lived in cali, but ended up in Nigeria. and of course wanted money to come here. I would give it, so she got the money herself and is now here in the states. I blocked the profile on ym but didn't delete it. Its been months since any contact and noticed the other day her profile has been updated. SHE IS A HE, lol. I sent a message calling him out on it and deleted the profile.

this wasn't the first, i've had 4 contact me that say live here and end up in nigeria. they all have the same story. I need money for bills, boo hoo. We are all poor here. My grandma is in the hospital and needs medicine, boo hoo.

Now when they tell me they are in africa, the first thing I ask is, how much money do you need?lol
 Lint Spotter
Joined: 8/27/2009
Msg: 18
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Posted: 10/11/2009 4:06:04 PM

BTW, he was not only cheating on her but me too! pfft

No, he was cheating on his wife with multiple people, you weren't cheated on, you were cheated with... there is a difference.
Joined: 2/3/2009
Msg: 19
Posted: 10/11/2009 4:27:11 PM
^^^ Arpeggia

I would agree he was cheating on you too. You were told he was single. You didn't know he was married, so as far as I'm concerned, you also were cheated on....
Joined: 5/11/2009
Msg: 20
Posted: 10/11/2009 4:44:52 PM
You rawk! Good job and I can't imagine why she's with the guy.
Joined: 4/28/2008
Msg: 21
Posted: 10/11/2009 4:56:40 PM
Posted by wolftxus:
Then again, who am I kidding - you are probably a guy anyway.

Last time I checked I was 100% female.

Joined: 10/23/2008
Msg: 22
Posted: 10/11/2009 9:22:02 PM
Good Gawd. Seriously, it took you that long to realize he was emotionally unavailable?
Joined: 4/26/2009
Msg: 23
Posted: 10/11/2009 10:05:44 PM
Welcome to the wonderful world of SH1T HAPPENS!

You couldnt avoid temptation? WTH?
So your just like him and her. LMAO
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 24
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Posted: 10/11/2009 11:03:37 PM
She's still with him, trying to work it out, going to counseling, probably calls a lot of women like you to get her attention in this game their marriage is. Drama, drama, drama is right, and I'm betting they both love it.

The last thing I would have done is call her and talk. I know people handle things differently, but I would not have wanted any part of either one of them.
Joined: 6/15/2007
Msg: 25
Posted: 10/12/2009 1:47:36 AM
Don't understand people who lie about who they really are.I for one have put down married with kids and looking for a fling.....then the only ones I get are the ones that are probably in the same position as i am .......and bingo ....1 for all and all 4 one.......
The delicate balance of roance then keeps on rolling.
Oh BTW the world is full of drama drama dama a bridge and get over it .....and I sicerely hope you find your true beloved.
As for me ......let the toga party continueeeeeeeeeeeeee
Greetings from OZ boys n gals
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