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Show ALL Forums  > Broken Hearts  > Still feeling lonely and depressed      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 ~Sexiest User~
Joined: 10/2/2009
Msg: 6
Still feeling lonely and depressedPage 1 of 2    (1, 2)
Hey OP,
I'm so sorry, for what you are going through..I know how very painful it can damages to our self esteem..your feelings are a very normal part of ending a relationships..All of the rejection, disappointment, depression, pain and anger are part of the process that you are to get beyond..And the depth of our despair seems to be overwhelming and the holidays seem to make it worse..This holiday may look a lot different from the ones in the past, but you will get beyond this and you will get beyond this feelings..Keep yourself focused with every blessing in your life..And continue to seek and read from everyone that is sharing their experiences from this FORUMS...Count and gives thanks for each and everyone of them..People come into our lives for all different reasons..And each person that touches our lives usually comes bearing a gift....Generally that gifts is in the form of a lesson we need to learn..Some lessons are harder than others..But...it's in learning the lessons..that we need to grow..You endured a lot of heartache and pain..Whether you blame the other person or you have guilt and you beat yourself up over it..Each time you go to that dark place in your mind, stop yourself..You are not alone..What good does it do to dwell on the past?? Where does it go?? How does it make you feel better as a person?? Choose to what you think, what you say to yourself and what you feel about any given time or circumtances by what you choose to look at it with..If you choose to hold onto the past..then don't expect to live a fulfilling life today..On the other hand if you truly accept What it is...learnt from it...just let it go of it and move on...And ifs and buts is the ultimate waste of time...letting completely go is not easy...But when you do, YOU can start to live now and on...You deserve all of the happiness and love you have always wanted and you can still have it...it will be with someone new...
Merry christmas to everyone!!!
lea in west tn
 CourtandSparkler
Joined: 6/23/2007
Msg: 8
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History
Still feeling lonely and depressed
Posted: 12/12/2009 11:58:25 AM
Why would you even still think about someone who abused you? Do you miss it? You need to really move on. Merry Christmas and don't end up with a another abuser in the New Year.
 parry10
Joined: 1/14/2006
Msg: 13
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Still feeling lonely and depressed
Posted: 12/14/2009 7:53:11 PM
Part of the game that abusers play is that they lure you in with genuine good times and caring behaviour.......then rip the carpet out....then treat you good again, then rip it out again........parental abuse on children works the same way.......so, don't be so hard on the abused person when they stay through this for a while..........of course they hope things get better....

..abusers typically don't show their true colours until they are sure they've worked their magic long enough to get the person emotionally dependant on them........we are all vulnerable to people like this....
 parry10
Joined: 1/14/2006
Msg: 15
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Still feeling lonely and depressed
Posted: 12/14/2009 9:06:19 PM

"we are all vulnerable to people like this"

No.. "WE" all are NOT! Only those who lead their lives through a FEELING first instead of a LOGIC/BRAIN first become vulnerable. Common sense rules. Emotions get played.. Logic will win out every time IF you always look at things through a THINKING filter before you determine how you FEEL about it.

That's what makes us unique in the animal kingdom.

Sadly, society has pushed so many of those to disregard their THINKING and instead react with FEELING first. BAD move


oh puhhlease......not all of us are as perfect as you profess to be in your profile.

Don't know about you but what my heart feels matters a whole lot to me.....but if you want to approach relationships like a clinical excercise in science, be my guest.
 ~Sexiest User~
Joined: 10/2/2009
Msg: 21
Still feeling lonely and depressed
Posted: 1/27/2010 6:40:09 PM
Hey OP,
Glad to hear from you...and hope things have improved and life looking better...Healing from abused is a hard process....It takes time to heal regardless of whether it happened just once or repeatedly....The phychological emotional effects of the ability to regulate one's internal physiology takes mile to recovery, into healing the effects of having been in a controlling, and abusive relationship....It is good to be alone for a little while to heal your whole capacity and learn to trust people around you....It is important to realize that you can function without a partner....A romance partner is not the scale of your self worth.....You are still vulnerable.....My biggest wish for YOU, that YOU take time......much time needed.....and know......and place all of your focus on you....YOU are a strong woman OP.....being away from him proves it.....And I hope that you continue to seek support......Come here and vent with us.....Surround yourself with a great support system to help you continue healing and keep you strong.....I sincerely wish YOU the best that your life has in store for YOU......Grow and thrive from this......Don't let it beat you down another day....Show the world YOU are more than what happend to YOU.......WE are here for you every step of the way.
lea in west tn
Show ALL Forums  > Broken Hearts  > Still feeling lonely and depressed