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Show ALL Forums  > Profile Reviews  > Do I just put the typical cliches in my profile?      Home login  
 AUTHOR
Do I just put the typical cliches in my profile?Page 1 of 1    
OK, go ahead, be as brutal as you feel you need to be folks. I'm so tired of writing to a woman, introducing myself and talking about what caught my eye in her profile, only to see later she has read my message and deleted it without reply. Its frustrating, since I feel my profile mentions enough details about me and what I'm looking for, and I think anyway, conveys a real sense of who I am. I know, I know, its all about your pictures, and I'm guessing some don't find me attractive, even if people other than my mom have said so!

So tell my, oh wise ones, what am I doing wrong here? Should I just fill up my profile with tired cliches about taking long walks on a moonlit beach?
Do I just put the typical cliches in my profile?
Posted: 2/3/2010 3:35:30 PM
You have far too much negativity in your profile. Ranting about your lack of success is not attractive.


I was going for tongue in cheek and a self-deprecating sense of irony (see my screen name?), not cynicism or woe is me bitterness. But I'll take your suggestion under advisement, thanks!

And hello to you too Tracy! I will split that up some, thanks for the tip! I can get a little verbose, but you already knew that.
 Delete_Me_Please
Joined: 11/10/2009
Msg: 3
Do I just put the typical cliches in my profile?
Posted: 2/3/2010 3:59:15 PM
Here goes:

1) Photos- Your captions indicate two photos are current, one photo is two years old, another is six years old and the others unknown. Nobody is interested in what you looked like years ago, they want to know what you'll look like when you meet. Ideally, all your photos should be less than a year old but I don't think you should go back more than two years. Also, your main image should be a headshot-- preferably with a smile. I think you should scrap all but the first picture and take some new ones with some good lighting.

2) Text- That first paragraph is just a wall of words, which is uncomfortable on the eyes and makes it hard to follow. You need to break it up so that each paragraph is less than five lines long. I suggest you remove any redundant information. You don't need to mention your age or that you're a SWM nor do you need to state your aversion to smoking twice. As for your age preference, you can set up your mail settings for your preferred age range.

3) Content- The majority of it discusses the dating/meeting process but I don't feel like I have a good sense of who you are or what your personality is like. I know it's difficult for many people to express this but I always suggest painting a picture in someone's mind. By that I mean instead of saying "You'd prefer to stay home with a movie," say something like, "You'd prefer to stay home together watching 'Airplane' as we're doubled over in laughter." It paints a picture and at the same time gives an idea of where your sense of humor leans and it gives her an opportunity to connect to you if she thinks, "I love that movie."
Do I just put the typical cliches in my profile?
Posted: 2/4/2010 1:49:45 PM
Thanks for some great suggestions! I've gone ahead and incorporated some of what was mentioned here; who knows, it might even work!
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