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 kailania
Joined: 4/10/2008
Msg: 1
players: do they ever focus on one person?Page 1 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
there are alot of talks on the forums about players.
it seems that people say that players are playing several women (or men) at once.

i am wondering if a player will ever play one woman, for a long time, and only that one woman?
like he will signs of what people here say a player is,
and i have heard that they will even introduce you to their families and will wait for sex.
even wait for months.
but that they have other woman they see too.

what if they do not have other women?
can he still be considered a player?
 packagedealx3
Joined: 2/4/2006
Msg: 2
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players: do they ever focus on one person?
Posted: 2/27/2010 9:49:32 PM
Um, no, that would be just considered an ass.
 kailania
Joined: 4/10/2008
Msg: 3
players: do they ever focus on one person?
Posted: 2/27/2010 10:19:37 PM
ok thanks. i see that some people want this deleted. but i get it anyway.
a player will have more than one.
he will have several.
thankyou
 Wishes Granted
Joined: 3/6/2008
Msg: 4
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players: do they ever focus on one person?
Posted: 2/27/2010 10:59:02 PM
I'd tend to think if a player introduced her to his parents, then she may be his primary girl.. Either that or his parents are the type that pat him on the head for his .. uhm.. "winning" ways. Bringing them ALL home would seem a little out of character of a player .. No?

Somehow I don't think Mrs. Woods met ALL of Tiger's harem ..
 acuddler
Joined: 10/30/2009
Msg: 5
players: do they ever focus on one person?
Posted: 2/28/2010 2:23:10 AM
Players ALWAYS focus on one person...THEMSELF...what they want, what they like, what they can get away with, what seems funny to them, etc. They often act very into someone else...but it IS just an act. Players never change. Playing is not what they DO...it is WHO, and WHAT, they ARE. They can no more change their playing ways than they can change their DNA. Players ALWAYS have other women...though some seem not to. Some play openly as a town playboy doing all they can, and not hiding it. Others keep it all hidden, and have two, or three, houses,wives, cars, etc, in seperate towns. Such usually have jobs involving travel...sales rep, truck driver, bus driver, airline pilot, politician, lobbyist, evangelist, musician, actor, etc.
 Maesbaby763
Joined: 12/6/2009
Msg: 6
players: do they ever focus on one person?
Posted: 2/28/2010 3:37:09 AM
ACUDDLER: You said it best and plain as day too. Of course bringing home one girl to meet his parents in my opinion reinforces the " player" status ,to give the one he took home a false sense of security. To her it might mean wow, I met his parents this must be serious and he likes me sooo much that I am meeting his family. Wrong. A player is faking a relationship with you, leading you on and giving you that false sense of security so that you will never suspect him of being a player.

That would ruin his game and his fun wouldn't it?
And of course he's not going to be truthful about it, his "playing" in his eyes is dating, nothing more.
Gotta keep one close so she'll never suspect a thing while he has 2 or 3 other's.
 want to travel
Joined: 7/29/2006
Msg: 7
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players: do they ever focus on one person?
Posted: 2/28/2010 3:40:50 AM
if he or she is just seeing one person, that would not make him or her a player, he or she would be the opposite of one
 Delete_Me_Please
Joined: 11/10/2009
Msg: 8
players: do they ever focus on one person?
Posted: 2/28/2010 3:49:14 AM
Warren Beatty was the epitome of a player or playboy but he settled down with one woman and so far, no stories of his infidelity have made headlines (which, of course, doesn't guarantee there hasn't been any). And I've known quite a few men and women who have been considered players at some point in their lives but have also committed to long term relationships.

Too often I think this term is bandied about, usually by women, to bash a guy who didn't want to commit to her. Rather than admit that he just wasn't into her, it's easier to blame it on some uncontrollable behavior on his part. But what might seem like a player could just be someone who's looking for that great connection and isn't going to waste his time or someone else's if he's not feeling it.
 Strings6
Joined: 7/14/2007
Msg: 9
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players: do they ever focus on one person?
Posted: 2/28/2010 4:07:25 AM
Male players exist because women love to be told what they want to here...female players exist because they are usually good at sex,give it up easily,are at least decent looking,otherwise few would be willing to play with them...and men like to be told what they want to hear....from my experience telling lies is the most common behaviour.
 luckyhot777s
Joined: 12/26/2008
Msg: 10
players: do they ever focus on one person?
Posted: 2/28/2010 4:31:10 AM

i am wondering if a player will ever play one woman, for a long time, and only that one woman?
like he will signs of what people here say a player is,
and i have heard that they will even introduce you to their families and will wait for sex.
even wait for months.


Surely you didn't just fall off the turnip truck.....There's more than one type of player....no player just for sex is going to wait months, rarely even weeks, there's too many out there who will have sex in a short amount of time for that.

A player in this instance, is a person who does this in a premeditated way using false statements and etc...to get what they want.

There are circumstances where someone thinks they were played, but not the case...

Ex...two people get together, it seems like things are going good...they date, etc....one night they meerly evolve to sex..meaning no one pushed the issue, it just happened.....Afterwards she starts acting like they are now committed, etc....he's thinks like wait a minute I'm not ready for that, I thought this just happened between consenting adults...etc

She continues in this way, he starts to back off. In other instances he might go along with this, see where it goes, it doesn't in the long run, he moves on.

Thus, she might think she got played...
 luckyhot777s
Joined: 12/26/2008
Msg: 11
players: do they ever focus on one person?
Posted: 2/28/2010 4:39:16 AM

what if they do not have other women?
can he still be considered a player?


Again a player is just someone who in a premeditated manner uses false words and actions to get what they want.....period, doesn't matter if its one or more.

On the flip side...some women lead men on to get free meals, dates, go to places, etc...with no intention of it going any further

Some use sex to get a guy.

Some just want some guy, any man, it doesn't matter to get security, someone to take care of them, she doesn't want to work or much, and she will play up to him for this. Saying things she doesn't mean...etc...when you think about it, thats a lot more too give up than meer sex, and considering the history of mankind on earth..one might wonder how much of this went on since the dawn of human kind...
 deerdog1
Joined: 12/29/2006
Msg: 12
players: do they ever focus on one person?
Posted: 2/28/2010 4:49:57 AM
My God you people and your assumptions amaze me ...A player is not like a certain type of animal who's traits can be defined ... there are many variations of the game ...as many as there are women ... a player is simply a guy who is not taking the relationship serious ...IE he is playing .... yet he leads the victim to think it is something it is not and he does this to achieve a pre determined motive ...IE he is playing... a player is more likely to have just one woman at a time than a simple womanizer .... but the players intention is to deceive to get what he wants ...and that may or may not be just sex ....a womanizer is just addicted to women ..and lets it be known ... most likely the victim of a player will think she is the only one ...its part of the game ... players are rare ... some guys are want to be players and many women accuse guys of being players when the reality is he just wasnt that into her..with a true player it all about the game /conquest ... many a actual player will actually have a list of women he has slept with ... his conquest are what he is about
 Chill Pill
Joined: 11/19/2009
Msg: 13
players: do they ever focus on one person?
Posted: 2/28/2010 5:22:10 AM
"" Players ALWAYS focus on one person...THEMSELF..."""

Bingo. Maybe the universal truth about players if we could generalize them all.
They are selfish. Self centered, self absorbed and egotistical.

Their intentions usually involved getting some need met for themselves alone and not taking into consideration the other persons feelings, thoughts, emotions or desires.

The cost of playing has no emotional price tag for them. It's all about them and the justifications are usually self serving as well.

One, two, five, six, twelve woman? It doesn't matter the play is on the emotions of the other and the stratergy is most often lying.

A man that has six woman and tells the truth to all of them that he has six of them is not a player he is a swinger with willing partners.

The only two things that define a player for me is self absorption and deceit.
 RonnieB77
Joined: 8/1/2009
Msg: 14
players: do they ever focus on one person?
Posted: 2/28/2010 5:26:38 AM
^^^^^This person is right on, except maybe players are more common in some circles than others.

Players love and excel at the chase and conquest. That is where their interest is. Maybe even marriage can be part of the conquest, one of my player friends has married so many times, but they are whirlwind. Players really have no interest in monogamy, they think it's for suckers and don't have a need to trust or be trusted. My friend was married to a beautiful nice wife, had a hot girlfriend on the side that he just met and was crazy about, and cheated on her with a hog the first week. Their sense of worth and acceptance comes from the validation of scoring. The guys who are good at it are kind of drunk with power and constant validation, like a spider-man villain.

I think you are describing a relationship in which the guy wants to be monogamous with you, but doesn't want the same things from the relationship as you. I think there isn't a thing in the world wrong with only wanting to be friends, or only wanting to be friends with benefits, or with having feelings but wanting to be monogamous and live separately. That only becomes wrong if you are not honest with the other person because you know that they want more and will move on if they know.

But if a person does make their boundaries known, I think you have to accept the answer and make your own decision about the relationship and not think you will get a different answer if you keep asking.
 sundownsam
Joined: 2/24/2010
Msg: 15
The way one can avoid a player .... (my opinion)
Posted: 2/28/2010 5:27:32 AM
This is why when meeting someone for the first time you should get to know them first rather than falling in love at first site. The person who is interested in you should be able to find a little hole in your heart to engrave a seed of honesty this way as it blooms you will be able to see who he is, ultimately opening your heart to him. One will be able to detect if honesty or lies is being engraved, honesty stay, lies are spit out.

Relationship is a topic I love writing about but the little I wrote is enough.
 afashionlady
Joined: 4/19/2008
Msg: 16
players: do they ever focus on one person?
Posted: 2/28/2010 5:28:15 AM

Players ALWAYS focus on one person...THEMSELF...what they want, what they like, what they can get away with, what seems funny to them, etc. They often act very into someone else...but it IS just an act.


OP--because Acuddler got it right all I'm going to add is that a "player" can be male or female and YES they can have one person..especially if that one person is willingly giving them any and everything they need and want. But once the well starts running dry...

And "player" is a really broad term. SOME women will come out here and cry they got played because they had sex "too fast" and the guy didn't call them or chose to hit it and move on. SOME men will come out and cry that they'll date these "hot" women who will treat them like dirt over and over again and take their money and drop them when they're done.
 here4-4umOnly
Joined: 2/16/2010
Msg: 17
players: do they ever focus on one person?
Posted: 2/28/2010 5:32:52 AM
I agree with everything that has been said here. There are many types of players, and yes they can and will focus on one person, though for how long is the question.
 BBQ Spider
Joined: 11/9/2009
Msg: 18
Short answer: yes.
Posted: 2/28/2010 7:14:13 AM
Players will play it either way. One at a time in sequence. Or more than one, each of whom thinks she is the only one.

And, the "meet the family" is not a significant relationship milestone to many people.

When I got played by a playing player, I met his family. I also noticed when his family would call, he never said my name to them, just "I'm on a date right now, son." Families of players just accept each new woman brought home for a meal or what-not, as Dad's (or GrandDad's !!!) "new friend" or, "flavor of the week."

"Making him wait for sex" will serve to weed out the more impatient players, but weed in the ones who enjoy a challenge.

If your past betrayals are what cause you to doubt -- give the guy some rope. If instead it's that your heads says "he has done nothing wrong" but you think you detect insincerity -- give the guy some rope.
 ColonelIngus
Joined: 9/16/2007
Msg: 19
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players: do they ever focus on one person?
Posted: 2/28/2010 7:22:45 AM

Players ALWAYS focus on one person...THEMSELF...what they want, what they like...

Hey, somebody's gotta do it!!


players: do they ever focus on one person?

Yes, but only if they're part-time players.

Or maybe just not very good at being a player.
 RushLuv
Joined: 4/16/2009
Msg: 20
Short answer: yes.
Posted: 2/28/2010 7:23:11 AM
I thought the whole point of being a player was to play multiple women. Not just one woman.
 beehearnow
Joined: 9/28/2007
Msg: 21
players: do they ever focus on one person?
Posted: 2/28/2010 7:28:37 AM

On the flip side...some women lead men on to get free meals, dates, go to places, etc...with no intention of it going any further

Some use sex to get a guy.

Some just want some guy, any man, it doesn't matter to get security, someone to take care of them, she doesn't want to work or much, and she will play up to him for this.


For some women this is just the way of life they were taught but none the less it is as an inappropriate way to behave is as a man hiding his various women from each other.
 brown_eyed_woman
Joined: 8/31/2008
Msg: 22
Short answer: yes.
Posted: 2/28/2010 8:15:13 AM
I think some players, to appease thier families, will focus on one lady publicly, even bring her around, to get momma off his back...you know...'when are you getting married, when are you going to introduce us to a nice girl?'

The player, being all about himself, will play along to keep the nagging at bay sometimes, and not care what message he is sending that girl. Lead her on, all the while still plotting some strange elsewhere.

It is a rare thing tho, thank goodness, most men, when asked outright 'do you have feelings for me' and they dont,will not answer that question with a 'yes, I love you'...They will fidget, change the topic, say they are not sure but maybe over time'...so ask the tough questions, and really listen/watch for the answer!
 AnarchoCapitalist
Joined: 12/31/2009
Msg: 23
players: do they ever focus on one person?
Posted: 2/28/2010 8:21:08 AM
They're focusing on whoever they're trying to play, whether that's one person or several.

Next!
 charlie_girl_2
Joined: 1/2/2010
Msg: 24
players: do they ever focus on one person?
Posted: 2/28/2010 8:35:21 AM
OP query as to Players... do they ever focus on one person?

It has been my experience that they most certainly DO NOT! Maybe women are the same, I wouldn't know, but in regards to those who qualify as "Players," it's been my experience that men under 50 usually aren't, but men over 57 tend to be the real players and are enjoying what I term as their "Last Hurrah" and will under no circumstances, ever focus on just one woman. That is, until they have a least one foot in the nursing home and then it is a OMG! scramble to hurry up and get a solid, loving companion ASAP! Then, and only then, does he realize that all the great women he either passed on or used up -- don't want him!

Players deserve what they end up with: NOTHING!


Charliegirl
 kailania
Joined: 4/10/2008
Msg: 25
players: do they ever focus on one person?
Posted: 2/28/2010 10:35:24 AM
thankyou, i think i understand what the definition of a player is.
they are basically dishonest people
they focus mainly ,and usually only , on their own needs and use others to get those needs meet.
they usually always have more than one woman (or man ) who they are "playing"
but this is hidden from the others. (so they are also cheating and lying)

they use smooth talking words.
some of their family will even go along (or at least begin to accept it). so, yes they can and do bring some women to meet their families.
but they dont name the person they are with while on the phone...instead they will say that they are with their gf (and name her).

also sounds from what alot of you said is that not many people are really players.
but the ones who are,..they are good at their so called game.
thankyou
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