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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Avoiding Issues and getting your Man to Commitment in a Relationship!      Home login  
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 packagedealx3
Joined: 2/4/2006
Msg: 3
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Avoiding Issues and getting your Man to Commitment in a Relationship!Page 1 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
Well, some of the things are duh, common sense.


3.Show him you’re independent.

Men are weary of women who sit back and wait for their men to fill every aspect of their lives. Let him know although you welcome his input in many ways, you are perfectly capable of doing things without him; in fact sometimes you prefer to do things on your own. For example you may want to see a certain movie, but he’s too busy to go with you. Instead of sulking, cheerfully tell him you’ll go by yourself, and do it.

Until he commits to you, do not make major changes in your life with a view of accommodating him. If you had plans to purchase your new condominium go ahead as if he was not in the picture. It may seem wise to hold off on your plans pending a commitment from him. Don’t, he may get the impression you’re not as independent as he thought. If you mention your plans to him do so only for the purpose of information and not as a means of forcing him to make a decision to commit to you. The purpose here is to genuinely show him that your life goes on with or without him.

This I see as a problem because some men seem to be into the White Knight thing and if they don't feel needed, they won't stick around. I have seen guys walk right past the together chick and go right for the dysfunctional whackjob just as there are women that go right past the good dependable guy and go after the guy that isn't going to care about them.
 xlr8ingmargo
Joined: 7/28/2009
Msg: 4
Avoiding Issues and getting your Man to Commitment in a Relationship!
Posted: 3/26/2010 8:02:13 PM
I say marriage is for the young that haven't figured out that it isn't required to have a healthy relationship.
 RushLuv
Joined: 4/16/2009
Msg: 7
Avoiding Issues and getting your Man to Commitment in a Relationship!
Posted: 3/26/2010 8:14:25 PM
I love that article! Though some of the information was obvious, the author of the article gave some really good insight and tips!

I know people close to me that should definitely take a look at that article!
 NowSucksLess
Joined: 2/4/2010
Msg: 8
Avoiding Issues and getting your Man to Commitment in a Relationship!
Posted: 3/26/2010 8:15:11 PM
I would read the article but...that's just too much of a commitment.
 late™
Joined: 2/1/2010
Msg: 9
When you want solid answers, ask an advertising hack.
Posted: 3/26/2010 9:25:48 PM
What's an articale?


A frothy brew from Frobisher bay?

Yeah, ...I checked the author, ..when you want advice about life, it's always best to go with a qualified, ...um, ...advertising copywriter?

Seriously ---->
 mibra
Joined: 8/30/2008
Msg: 10
Avoiding Issues and getting your Man to Commitment in a Relationship!
Posted: 3/26/2010 9:27:05 PM
I read it ... Now I changed my mind. I don't want to get committed at all Too much work! I would rather be myself.
 Free-At-Last
Joined: 7/15/2009
Msg: 11
Avoiding Issues and getting your Man to Commitment in a Relationship!
Posted: 3/26/2010 9:27:35 PM

In this article he gives Nine ways to win your man’s heart so he will want to commit to you.

I'd rather read an article entitled "10 ways to have your man committed"
 mibra
Joined: 8/30/2008
Msg: 13
Avoiding Issues and getting your Man to Commitment in a Relationship!
Posted: 3/26/2010 9:33:42 PM

I wholeheartedly agree the reason people don't get married and the high divorce rate are because of less incentives (to get married, or to stick around) but I feel it's primarily the lack of social consequences to divorce than the increase in financial consequences.

This article seems really really bad IMO. It seems based purely on stereotype. I don't see anything to show he got his information from any credible source of study.


It is my 3rd time wholeheartedly agree with a man.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 14
Avoiding Issues and getting your Man to Commitment in a Relationship!
Posted: 3/26/2010 9:39:12 PM
That article assumes that all women are trying to marry men off. Not so.

I agree with the poster that said it's for people too young to realize marriage isn't worth the trouble.
 late™
Joined: 2/1/2010
Msg: 15
Avoiding advice from ad hacks
Posted: 3/26/2010 9:39:14 PM
I don't see anything to show he got his information from any credible source of study.

Well, he is only an advertising copywriter, cut him some slack, ...then pull real hard on the rope.


VVV --> Uh oh, is this one going to be deleted too?
 VivaciousVixen2010
Joined: 7/12/2008
Msg: 17
Avoiding advice from ad hacks
Posted: 3/26/2010 10:42:39 PM
any man who doesn't want to be with me or where there
is a lack of appreciation from his end of our relationship
then no matter how i may not like to break up, ultimately
it is in my best interest because life is too short to be alone
and life is too short to be unappreciated if i am spending time
with a man and chose him as my partner.
personally, i think anybody who dates~sleeps around~YEAH*
is a downright idiot
but
whatever~~~~~i don't need or want time wasters
 aremeself
Joined: 12/31/2008
Msg: 18
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Avoiding advice from ad hacks
Posted: 3/26/2010 10:52:35 PM
margo, are you saying that we should just be naive and continue to put up with each other, because really, how much better do you think the next person is going to be?

those are my thoughts, but they are not very popular with the ME crowd.
 WalksOnWater2
Joined: 5/19/2009
Msg: 19
Avoiding Issues and getting your Man to Commitment in a Relationship!
Posted: 3/27/2010 12:17:50 AM

I came across an interesting articale called; Why men delay marriage.

I love this kind of fiction articales...

it is a lot easier for a man to get sex without having to say
"I do."

If you read enough of the forum posts, you will find out that this is fiction too.


due to the financial looses

Who are them?

he gives Nine ways to win your man’s heart so he will want to commit
to you. Do you agree with this and what happened to number 10?

If the eight previous ways plus love potion number nine did not do the job, it's safe to assume that it's time to call it a night and try again another day...
 aremeself
Joined: 12/31/2008
Msg: 21
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Avoiding advice from ad hacks
Posted: 3/27/2010 1:39:32 AM
sounds like a lot of pretty good stuff in there.
haven't read it all yet, but I bet we need even more advise.

so, what are some of the surprises that we don't agree with?


you know, its almost like we humans are a bunch of little babies.
we need everything spelled out for us.

and we obviously do, if the divorce rate is that high, and getting worse, I will presume.

what a bunch of immature spoilt brats we are in this never before in the history of man spoilt societies that some of us preside in.

can you believe it? we got everything that money can buy, but we are like the forever whining israelites in the bible, whether you believe that book or not.
 luckyhot777s
Joined: 12/26/2008
Msg: 27
Avoiding Issues and getting your Man to Commitment in a Relationship!
Posted: 3/27/2010 3:58:33 AM
Most data released is a compilation of the information given to the questions asked...if its anything like the information put into dating sites by the partipants?

Then the information is tainted, and can't be taken seriously....
 luckyhot777s
Joined: 12/26/2008
Msg: 28
Avoiding Issues and getting your Man to Commitment in a Relationship!
Posted: 3/27/2010 4:02:06 AM

Who the hell wants to work to make a man be committed to them??


You would be surprised at how many are ready to just settle with someone, fear of time running out, tired of working, etc....all the wrong reasons, but there are quite a few out there...and yes, commitment desire is there and whatever it takes to get it.

Its probably the number one thing a man my age has to be on the lookout for, if he wants someone who is real with real feelings.
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 29
Avoiding Issues and getting your Man to Commitment in a Relationship!
Posted: 3/27/2010 4:09:25 AM

You would be surprised at how many are ready to just settle with someone, fear of time running out, tired of working, etc....all the wrong reasons, but there are quite a few out there...and yes, commitment desire is there and whatever it takes to get it.


Maybe it's because these are the people who read these types of articles with the belief that following a set of generic guidelines with help you with finding an INDIVIDUAL with whom you would love to spend quite a bit of time with. I don't think I would ever enjoy getting advice from these types of articles. Generic doesn't interest me.
 Arabianangel
Joined: 6/9/2007
Msg: 33
“Imagine how I would feel if someone better comes along and I’m already in a committed relationship?”
Posted: 3/27/2010 5:17:36 AM
See I can't imagine any sane woman going out of her way to read a set of rules, let alone sit there and practice them for the sake of 'commitment'. Men are the simplest creatures of God's creation, when they fall they’ll be the ones pursing you for a commitment. Only problem is, they may end up falling for the ‘rules’ rather than the real woman.
 JerseyGirl2008
Joined: 12/27/2007
Msg: 34
Avoiding Issues and getting your Man to Commitment in a Relationship!
Posted: 3/27/2010 5:24:08 AM

Interestingly, I made a decision to casual date and have no inclination to be in a relationship or get married and guess what the guys are all over me to committ. Funny how these things are percieved.

I've had the same exact thing happen to me over and over these last few years since I became single again. I'd also decided I was simply going to date casually without making any commitments to anyone and I thought men would love this! A woman who wasn't looking to lasso the poor guy and drag him to the alter or expect any type of commitment or serious relationship from him. I figured this would be a desireable trait!

Not so.

Most made it quite clear that if I wasn't going to commit to an exclusive relationship with them, they didn't want to see me anymore.

I laugh when I constantly see men claiming that it's the women who are looking for commitment from them. That hasn't been my experience these last few years at ALL.
 Rarebird76
Joined: 5/10/2009
Msg: 35
Avoiding Issues and getting your Man to Commitment in a Relationship!
Posted: 3/27/2010 5:33:28 AM
Most made it quite clear that if I wasn't going to commit to an exclusive relationship with them, they didn't want to see me anymore.

I laugh when I constantly see men claiming that it's the women who are looking for commitment from them. That hasn't been my experience these last few years at ALL.
Men who want an exclusive relationship aren't rare but this article is about how it pertains to marriage which is a total game changer. Committing to a relationship is a lot easier than taking it all the way to marriage. I thought the article was good but I fear that some women might just use it as a guide to get what they want then pull the bait & switch on the suckered 'fish' once married. If a woman is GENUINELY possessing those traits that's different; but there are no shortage of manipulators out there....
 ColonelIngus
Joined: 9/16/2007
Msg: 38
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Avoiding Issues and getting your Man to Commitment in a Relationship!
Posted: 3/27/2010 6:58:51 AM

...and what happened to number 10?

It would have over-taxed their widdle bwains?

Personally, I would have kept it to three or four. "Girl game" is much less advanced than guy game.
 ItsMargo
Joined: 4/24/2007
Msg: 39
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Avoiding Issues and getting your Man to Commitment in a Relationship!
Posted: 3/27/2010 7:15:53 AM
It seems to me most people live their lives as if they had sat down and planned out the 9 steps to "have life go the way I don't want it to work out".
 StatlerandWaldorf
Joined: 6/1/2009
Msg: 41
Avoiding Issues and getting your Man to Commitment in a Relationship!
Posted: 3/27/2010 7:37:26 AM

Men face little social pressure to get married because unlike in times past it is a lot easier for a man to get sex without having to say I do.


Um, opposite! It is women who are now free to have sex - sorry, 'get' sex - outside of marriage without being kicked to the societal curb. It's not the grooms who have to wear virginal white on their wedding days. I'm no social historian but I think discretionary pre-marital dalliances have been pretty well accepted if not expected for men, especially in middle and upper classes.

(Ok not really opposite as I do agree that men face much less social pressure to get married - but not because it's easier to 'get sex' - but women also have much less social pressure to get married.)


Pay little attention to the previously well-publicized strategies that promise to motivate your man to commit to you; they do not work and men are weary of them.


Bwahahaha. 'Don't listen to those other trashy articles you read! Just listen to my trashy article!'
 majyk1
Joined: 4/26/2009
Msg: 43
Avoiding Issues and getting your Man to Commitment in a Relationship!
Posted: 3/27/2010 8:51:21 AM
["Why men delay marriage"]
Here's a novel idea.... because they're not ready. Duh


["what you can do to guide your man to happily commit to you"]
I shouldnt have to 'guide' {play games} to get someone to 'commit' to me.

And im with the poster that stated:
["since when does commitment = marriage']
IT DOESNT!
 RushLuv
Joined: 4/16/2009
Msg: 45
Avoiding Issues and getting your Man to Commitment in a Relationship!
Posted: 3/27/2010 10:11:36 AM

personally, i think anybody who dates~sleeps around~YEAH*
is a downright idiot


It would have been different, had this came from someone with no provocative photos on display.

The only thing that would make some people idiots for sleeping around, is if their sleeping around is done irresponsibly.


Since when did commitment = marriage?


I agree. I could have sworn the author was giving tips on getting a man to commit to a long term relationship with a woman, not a woman trying to manipulate and force a man to marry her.

I do believe, in order to get a man to commit, there are some things that indeed could be avoided and worked at.
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