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 Booha
Joined: 2/15/2010
Msg: 1
have any other guys experienced this?Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
recently I started conversation with a woman on here, messaged back and forth a few times about our interests, etc, and then became very flirtatious. Her being quite attractive and intelligent of course i'm going with it, flirting back and its going great. she tells me she had met up with others on here just for sex, and was interest in more than that, fine by me, yet she insisted on continuing the sexual conversation despite having told me this. This happened on more than one occasion. I was interested in meeting up but she seemed hesitant to even speak on the phone (we never did) or rush any meeting. Later I try to steer the conversation back to something more platonic but her focus is purely sexual. Another day I try contacting her, completely platonic message in hopes of not getting trapped into this sexual game of hers or whatever you call it, The next thing I know she has severed all contact with me without explanation. Has anyone else ever experienced this type of person online who was only interested strictly in an "online fling" , what is the motivation, it seems pointless to me and sends mixed signals...
 rainman12
Joined: 10/18/2007
Msg: 2
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have any other guys experienced this?
Posted: 6/9/2010 12:27:52 AM

what is the motivation, it seems pointless to me and sends mixed signals...


Could be a billion reasons for it ranging from liking the attention and ego boost to being bored at work to being a kid messing around with you using a fake profile and pics to them just plain being a sociopath. This list could go on and on....

It's not nicknamed "plenty of flakes" for nothing. Not much you can do about it except learn from it for the next time it might happen.
 Booha
Joined: 2/15/2010
Msg: 3
have any other guys experienced this?
Posted: 6/9/2010 1:03:06 AM

Not sure, but perhaps to her, you were sending mixed signals....you engaged in the sexual conversations, she made it clear she was just into sex. You then tried to send it to a platonic type thing....thats kinda mixed.


she did not make it clear, in fact she said that she was not looking just for sex. I was looking to vary the conversation so it wasn't just strictly sex. anyway, I think i'm going to chalk it up to her just not wanting to meet in person and just get her jollys online with some random guy and move on. shes messed. thanks for the comments.
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 4
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have any other guys experienced this?
Posted: 6/9/2010 4:37:04 AM
Oh, sure. I just experienced something a LITTLE like that. Had a series of email conversations with a woman, in my instance, there was no sexual talk going on though. But in the same way, after a series of friendly, thoughtful messages, she suddenly announced that I was a dastardly person, because I had not rapidly pushed for a full blown romantic fling, and cut me off, and blocked me.
The way I see it, there are people out there in the world, who's emotions are on a hair trigger. They can behave quite rationally for extended periods of time, because they believe they SHOULD, in order to get what they want from life. But when a certain amount of time goes by, and they fail to receive the rewards they anticipated, they fly into a rage at the injustice of it all, and lash out.
The closest common thing to it, is the sort of behavior very common in children aged about 2-5 years old. Parents spend the first few years of a child's life, trying to get them to behave by way of a rewards system, wherein if the child performs as the parent directs, they will get the "treat" they've been begging for. With a small child, MOST parents realize that their attention span and depth of understanding is insufficient to permit LONG RANGE goals, or more subtle distinctions to make a difference; that the child will respond VERY badly if the "reward" does not come very quickly after the desired performance. Unfortunately, some people never outgrown this child state, and spend their lives demanding instant long-term rewards for short-term good behavior.
 Booha
Joined: 2/15/2010
Msg: 5
have any other guys experienced this?
Posted: 6/9/2010 7:54:15 AM
probably the best advise so far, thanks man!
 Booha
Joined: 2/15/2010
Msg: 6
have any other guys experienced this?
Posted: 6/9/2010 9:16:47 AM
well its good to know i am not the only guy to experience this online, so it's not my fault then, nothing i did wrong..except maybe give into their 'game" ill be more careful next time and not waste time
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 7
have any other guys experienced this?
Posted: 6/9/2010 9:07:15 PM
Some women (and some men) simply have to way to interact with the other sex but via sex. The idea of friends or fun simply escapes them. So even though she wanted more than *just* sex, she had no idea what else to offer. When you didn't take her up on the sexy stuff, she decided she'd failed, and flew the coup.

Keep on truckin'

 windloverr
Joined: 2/29/2008
Msg: 8
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have any other guys experienced this?
Posted: 6/10/2010 4:15:48 PM
Bottom line...head trip...avoid at all costs; and be thankful you never met.
 naturallydeselected
Joined: 6/6/2010
Msg: 9
have any other guys experienced this?
Posted: 6/12/2010 8:12:56 AM
She wanted an online sex fantasy that was low risk without any emotional drama.
She could've been married or has a boyfriend who's a dud in bed and she wanted an esteem boost or material to think about while she's having "real" sex. There are plenty of women out there who do this.
 Booha
Joined: 2/15/2010
Msg: 10
have any other guys experienced this?
Posted: 6/15/2010 6:54:54 PM
cool, I just got an explaination. someone in her family is dying. aparently that correlates somehow to random blocking...
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