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Show ALL Forums  > Broken Hearts  > Are relationships just disposable these days???      Home login  
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 3
Are relationships just disposable these days???Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
If someone isn't into you - there's nothing to fix. It's one thing if you are both interested but have other issues that get in the way of a relationship, But if one isn't into being there - there's no fix for that. You can only control your end of things.

To me dating someone who's not that interested in dating me makes them a non option - I only consider mutual interests. *shrug*

It's not so much a mentality of so many people being available as it is realizing sooner rather than later that someone isn't that interested in you...and that out there somewhere is someone who could be. You don't want to miss a good prospect trying to analyze one that's never gonna happen.

P.S.: by the time a lot of people who post here start a thread, they've analyzed it more than they should have and are unable to see lack of interest for the attraction they have. Perhaps this is why people tell them to move on.
Joined: 8/4/2007
Msg: 4
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Are relationships just disposable these days???
Posted: 7/29/2010 7:38:05 AM
OP - I think it depends on where you are in a dating/relationship situation.

Would I "try to fix" something with someone I've emailed with for a week? Nope.
Would I "try to fix" something with someone I've gone out with twice? Nope.

I'd go to the ends of the earth for someone I loved though.

The exchange of an email doesn't give you "rights" to a person - you aren't in a relationship, if they "disappear" at that point, they do...happens all the time.

It's hard to answer this question without knowing exactly what kind of situation you are talking about.
Joined: 12/9/2009
Msg: 8
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Are relationships just disposable these days???
Posted: 7/29/2010 11:17:21 AM
Well after 21 yrs of marriage , I tried to get significant other to counseling, finally got her to g0 and shrink said her fault, went to another, same conclusion. Depression for her set in, I aint been laid in six years and never cheated...............

So do I think I left somthing good? FFFFFN No, my ex is a self destructive individual still trying to destroy the same mate that supported and cared for her all her life
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 12
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Are relationships just disposable these days???
Posted: 7/30/2010 2:06:21 PM
You've apparently not read most of the posts here in these forums, or on other sites, or listened to any radio shows where relationships are discussed. All of these places are FILLED with examples of people trying hard to make things work. More people try to fix things than don't.
Think carefully also, on where you look for your information: here, is a site filled MOSTLY with people who have already tried to make something work elsewhere, and have come here because they now KNOW they have to move on. Therefore, even looking in these forums, you will get MOSTLY people who are moving on, and you will be ignoring all the ones still out there trying. Rather like going to a Republican convention, and complaining that you don't meet enough liberals.
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 20
Are relationships just disposable these days???
Posted: 8/5/2010 4:38:11 AM
^^^Agreed. Added: let's not forget 40-50 years ago where marriages lasted longer because women really had no choice but to stay and work it out. They had nowhere else to go unless their parents took them in for a couple of days, but inevitably, they'd be talked into going home and making it work either because they chose to marry their spouse, for the sake of the kids (my favorite), or both. So they'd go home and the couple would grow apart under the same roof.

Men a lot of times just cheated and kept the marriage intact once their wives lost interest, and it was sort of accepted that they might do that. Some women cheated too if they had the means and some time away from their kids.

If a lot of those women had better options and couples weren't in fear of being ostracized by society for being divorced and used goods, someone would have filed and left.

And of course, not all men cheated and not all women were unhappy, but the attitude back then was to make sure everyone thought you were happy no matter what, so we'll never know outside of people we know how many really were.
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 23
Are relationships just disposable these days???
Posted: 8/10/2010 9:44:01 AM

my observation is people do not work out their problems, they cut bait and run instead of working to get thru the most difficult hurdles that life throws at them.

I think the majority of relationships aren't different than in years past, but the options are. I think just as many people would have cut bait and run years ago had there not been social/legal/survival repercussions. Sure, some were meant to be together then and some aren't meant to be together now, but mostly - people now don't have to waste 10 years realizing there's no work that can fix things.
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