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Joined: 3/9/2010
Msg: 1
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what you think of minePage 1 of 1    
I usually dont write much so im impressed with myself. I appreciate any input thanks

I was thinking its too long, and maybe a lil too sappy even for my tastes.. should i shorten it up a bit? be less honest
 You go first
Joined: 5/1/2008
Msg: 2
what you think of mine
Posted: 9/11/2010 5:12:57 PM
Sappy may be one of the words. Definitely not too long for the right girl.

You really need to fill in the Interests field. Please for God's sake don't put cuddling, kissing, holding hands, snuggling... just don't. Although, one of your interests is apparently that lovely brunette with the nice rack featured in two of your gallery pictures. Why aren't you dating you? or are you??

There are ways to get across the message subtlely that you appreciate affection without having to have the girls fill in a questionnaire to see if they can keep up to your 20x a week. Please dial back the cuddling in the profile - this is one of those online dating cliches - cuddling on the couch watching The Notebook while drinking red wine. It's become a joke.

You mention you're self employed. Unless you want the female mind to run wild, I'd suggest you put in what type of industry you're involved. Or - add a line or two in the profile body about it - stability, commitment (to your job) and responsibility are very attractive traits in a long-term partner.

Delete the photo of your minor child. For many reasons, it's just not appropriate here.

Although you may get a lot of interest based on your looks, you will ultimately be disappointed with the quality of those women unless you offer more for the right ones to find points in common. Details.

I look forward to a rewrite.
Joined: 5/6/2010
Msg: 3
what you think of mine
Posted: 9/11/2010 5:39:38 PM
Yeah, if you had such a good 'last year', you don't need any advice. Maybe you can share yours... :-)
Joined: 2/8/2009
Msg: 4
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what you think of mine
Posted: 9/11/2010 7:24:13 PM
Pics,. you're holding yourself back. Don't share the frame. No kid.

About me; this is a structure I'm not fond of. Its got a bit of a lecture about internet dating in the middle instead of info about you. Leave more real junk about you and less of the dreary dating rhetoric.
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