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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > 1st email not replied to, but dated later anyway?      Home login  
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 4408joseph
Joined: 1/10/2008
Msg: 1
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1st email not replied to, but dated later anyway?Page 1 of 1    
Just curious without high jacking another thread.

Anyone ever have the first email here..deleted, unread, no answer and end up on a date with this person at a later date?

Can be either way...sending or receiving. Deleted by user or POF .

I've been here long enough it's happened a few times, just wondering if it's happen to others and their thoughts. Is a never first email a total killer? Or does cyberspace have a more flexible rule book.

1) I sent..never read. Following summer we ended up dating for 3 months, after she contacted me. Said about the time I sent her an email she went for back surgery and was away from the site for 6 months.

2) I sent ...read, no reply. 6 months later we ended meeting when she contacted... Said when she got my email she was on her way to west coast to finish up custody court stuff and knew she'd be away 4 months.

3) This summer I contacted a phish we chatted and a meet. She asked why I never read and replied to her email, but contacted her 8-9 month later... Yep was in the contact history she was correct. Must have not logged on for over 30 days as I ALWAYS try to reply to all the "couple" emails a week I get.

 femaleconnection
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 2
1st email not replied to, but dated later anyway?
Posted: 12/20/2010 11:02:21 AM
Yes, I met and dated someone that earlier I did not respond to. I had read it and allowed pof to auto delete many days/weeks later.

He re emailed me with a really funny joke about it, and that changed my earlier perception of him. He did not whine or call me names...he made a really funny joke. (I thought it was funny).

Long story short, we dated a few times, discovered we are not at all compatible and went seperate ways.

This did not change my ways on here...I still continued to not bother responding to profiles that didnt catch my eye at all....because they didnt catch my eye.
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 3
1st email not replied to, but dated later anyway?
Posted: 12/20/2010 12:04:31 PM
I think a unread/deleted is better than a read/deleted, because one could easily be taken or generally off the market and just tossing out any other prospects out the window... or just travelling, and using POF as the way to talk to someone they do want to correspond with, etc.

But in the end, no, they aren't interested. Whether that be someone else, your looks, or just not interested in anyone/thing on POF.

And most of the time, no, they don't find you particularly attractive. I would say a rule of thumb would be is if you've seen them active on for a good long while, for several months and they did pop up in the thumbnails & searches, yeah, they don't want you. Hey, it's just an(other) email, right? Why not? Ehhh, if you happened to run into them in public at the bar, you'd be seen as a creep by them & anyone who corresponds with them. Well, what are the chances of that? Not big -- but much bigger than them ending up having interest in that case, that's for sure.
 pamsfl
Joined: 8/14/2009
Msg: 4
1st email not replied to, but dated later anyway?
Posted: 12/21/2010 2:57:17 PM
As they say, timing is everything. Someone may not respond to message for a variety of reasons. Maybe they just had a good date and want to see where it will go. Maybe they have a sick family member or are out of town and then feel weird responding late...it happens.
 4408joseph
Joined: 1/10/2008
Msg: 5
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1st email not replied to, but dated later anyway?
Posted: 12/21/2010 6:39:49 PM

timing is everything


Yes, to a degree.
However, in the real world you have a chance at seeing some, many of times..Storekeep, bank teller, PTA meetings,library, etc etc etc.

To read here in the internet dating world forums... It's like a one time deal almost all the time. I hear of people getting "blocked" all the time after just one email.

Ones are harping on another thread, if someone doesn't respond within a few days then they are not interested.

In the real world that's sooo not true. We all know someone that one wasn't interested in the other at first, and then first thing you know they are together for years and years.

Again, it seems a theme here . No instant response, no chance, move on.
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 6
1st email not replied to, but dated later anyway?
Posted: 12/22/2010 3:27:43 PM
All relative to the person you are e-mailing. A lot of times the females get hit with soooooo many e-mails they have a tough time figuring out whats what. What you will find is that once someone has been here enough, and read enough, and looked enough, they do start putting things into perspective,as in, the reality of it all. Then, all of a sudden your profile looks amazing to some.
 arwen52
Joined: 3/13/2008
Msg: 7
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1st email not replied to, but dated later anyway?
Posted: 12/22/2010 4:32:48 PM
No, but I love your profile photo!

I've met guys and then later met them again and not remembered them. In fact, I ended up in a band with a guy I'd met off Craig's List and didn't remember meeting. It was a pretty forgetable meeting. Two years later, we're playing music together. Several months into it, I notice his email address is familiar and check my old emails. His email address made more of an impression on me than he did! Poor guy. He never said a word to me about it so I wonder if he remembers and didn't mention it or if he forgot, too. He's nice but really not my style at all.
 Gwendolyn2010
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 8
1st email not replied to, but dated later anyway?
Posted: 12/23/2010 6:54:37 PM
I haven't seen an email to someone that was deleted and then later, we had a date.

I have, however, met guys whom I "sent away" after the first or second email who sent me another one later. I always rued giving in because my first impressions were correct.

I have had several men whom I told that I was not interested--or to whom I was rude because of the content of the emails--who also later sent emails as if they had not previously contacted me. I THINK that they hoped that I would forget our prior conversations. If they didn't have a picture, that could happen, but I rarely forget faces
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