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Show ALL Forums  > Single Parents  > Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?      Home login  
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 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 4
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Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?Page 1 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
Absolutely right. Anything and EVERYTHING is a turn off to SOMEONE. You can be rich, handsome, free of emotional burdens, childless, caring, sensitive, strong....and there will be women who look and say "he's too self-sufficient, he wont need me; he'll have too easy a time finding lovers, so I'll have to work to hard to keep his interest; he has no kids, so he doesn't understand the emotions of a mother or father; he'll spend all his time exercising, etc.
Focus on your strengths, and accept that THIS ISN'T EASY. Or at least that it's only easy to find insignificant relationships.
 U make it entertaining
Joined: 7/17/2009
Msg: 6
Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 3/30/2011 6:55:54 AM
You are a package deal.
That will only interest a select few in the dating world.

So I suggest you do as the others stated.
Get your profile over to Profile Review.

And remember ... Your 3 little ladies ALWAYS come first.
 KiwiBassist
Joined: 5/24/2010
Msg: 7
Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 3/30/2011 8:40:06 AM
remove the picture with the girl with her arms around you as well. Other women don't want to see a guy who's looking for a relationship post pics of some chick with their arms around him regardless of who it is, unless it is his daughters, or his mum.
 BoonDockSaint73
Joined: 3/29/2010
Msg: 8
Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 3/30/2011 10:03:00 AM
I too am a single dad.

some girls will, some girls won't..

what IS a turn off is a single dad who does not take care of his responsibilities in regards to his children NOR does he make time to date.

if she feels like you are looking for a mama to your children- that's a turnoff to most.

if she feels like she is really having to compete for your attention that is a turnoff.

if your ex is in the picture causing drama- that is a turnoff.


it all depends on how well you manage your children and her.

if she feels like you do both well- it shouldn't be a problem.

heck- i've had plenty of unsolicited offers of full term relationship/marriage from girls who WANTED to mother my children.

i've had to beat them away with a stick at times.
 Red Fish GF
Joined: 12/3/2009
Msg: 10
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Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 3/30/2011 2:48:46 PM
some girls will, some girls won't..

what IS a turn off is a single dad who does not take care of his responsibilities in regards to his children NOR does he make time to date.

if she feels like you are looking for a mama to your children- that's a turnoff to most.

if she feels like she is really having to compete for your attention that is a turnoff.

if your ex is in the picture causing drama- that is a turnoff.


it all depends on how well you manage your children and her.

if she feels like you do both well- it shouldn't be a problem.



This topic is redundant as I've answered a similar thread before. Some women prefer to date a man with kids as they have more in common if they are still raising young kids at home too. Almost every man I had interest in since my divorce has had kids of his own. My SO has three young children but they are only at his house part time. It wouldn't of been a turn off if he had full custody as I have two young children at home with me.


^^^The OP changed his profile to state he has his girls full time.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 15
Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 3/31/2011 10:06:55 AM
I don't mind dating a custodial parent, but in the beginning I feel like the kids shouldn't be involved. It's hard to spend time with someone who's kids are around 5-7 days a week when you don't necessarily want to be around while the kids are. Down the line I may not want to be a second mother, so I may only want to see him when he doesn't have the kids - which isn't all that often.

It's the same with single mothers who are close to full or full time parents. It's tough in the beginning before you know it's going to go somewhere coordinating time to date and keep your kids from getting involved.

And the younger they are, the more they need to be the primary focus. It may just not be a good time to bring a new person into your life.
 BigBadNIrish
Joined: 1/31/2011
Msg: 16
Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 3/31/2011 11:57:14 AM
OP...I'd trim up my profile a bit...and just spell out you're a full-time dad...drop the part about your kids come first...there isn't a parent alive that doesn't know that your kids come first...and those women who don't have kids and don't understand this...well, these types of self-centered women aren't really what you're looking for now are they???

So, OP...look for who will be accepting of you and your kids...who's that...beats me but, they are there, date -ible, and available.....and those that aren't, so what, we're not looking for them anyway.
 Irish Eyez
Joined: 12/30/2008
Msg: 21
Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 4/3/2011 7:48:10 PM
I'd date a man with kids.

As long as they are grown up and or out of the nest!

I won't date a man with young children!
 BigBadNIrish
Joined: 1/31/2011
Msg: 22
Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 4/4/2011 6:33:02 AM
OP's 30 yo...I'm thinking he's looking for someone a little closer to his age...by a decade or two...

OP...I've seen it suggested that you only look for women with young children...and while this isn't a bad idea...it is somewhat short sided...because there are women who want children but cannot have them....there are women who would be accepting of your children and would want to bear a child too...and there are women who've already got children who would accept your's as well...

The long and short is that if you put yourself out there enough...you will find someone who accepts you and your children...and this woman will either have children of her own or not.
 CheezyChick
Joined: 9/23/2009
Msg: 25
Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 5/1/2011 3:18:24 AM

Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?

I am currently dating a man with 3 children. I was interested before I knew he had children, and still interested after being informed that he had three.

One of the most attractive qualities I find in him, is seeing how wonderful a father he is to his children.
 Jersey125
Joined: 1/23/2011
Msg: 28
Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 5/3/2011 12:14:43 PM

Depending on the context, tone and frequency from which that statement is said it could be a hint to the other person that parental responsibilities dictates how/what he does.


Im a single father and Im happy to defend those who dont have children. Single childless people arent stupid. They know if they are dating someone with children that things may come up and the relationship is going to have different circumstances to deal with compared to dating someone without a child.

And guess what...people without children have commitments and responsibilties just like single parents do. I have a friend who owns a small retail retail store with several employees. The store does consume a large amount of her time. If she has a date at 6pm and one of her employees calls out sick at 5:55 and no one else is available to cover for that person..guess who has to cancel her date and tend to the store?

If she had a personal ad that said "my business is my world" she would be dimissed as a workaholic.

starzgirl72 is right ALL people need to respect that other people have responsibilities and commitments
 Orgulloso
Joined: 8/28/2010
Msg: 32
Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 5/31/2011 6:32:03 AM

Speaking for myself if a man feels he has to remind me that he has children and they come first. Then I feel like he has been through some sort of dramatic ordeal to feel the need to disclose this info to me. I don't go around saying 'Hey your cute, wanna go out? By the way my kids mean more to me than you."
See what I am saying...I know you love your kids. It doesn't mean you are a dead beat dad if you don't mention them.


I see your point, I have a similar statement in my profile and don't know if it torpedos my chances or not. But since you hit on it; I grew up in a single parent household and am obviously still impacted by that "dramatic ordeal". Nonetheless your point is well taken and I'm rewriting my profile to lessen the emphasis of my feelings of responsibility to my children.

Thanks!
 BigBadNIrish
Joined: 1/31/2011
Msg: 35
Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 6/2/2011 3:00:06 PM
lord...if I only had a nickel for every womans profile that I read that says "my children come first"...I'd be a rich man...
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 36
Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 6/2/2011 3:22:39 PM
I actually like a guy that tells me his kids come first. Unfortunately I meet a lot of men who's kids don't seem to come first if they get what they consider a better offer, and that's a major turn off. I can't tell you how many times I've heard a guy say he's got his kids for the weekend - but he'll leave them with his mom if I'm game to go out. Or he's got his kids but would I like to join them somewhere? Blech!

A guy fought for visitation during a divorce so he should honor it and spend the time with his kids he made a big deal about wanting. Ditching them for a date or trying to bring a new woman into the plans goes against the whole thing. Gross.
 BigBadNIrish
Joined: 1/31/2011
Msg: 38
Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 6/3/2011 4:29:24 AM

One poster who said they have issues with men claiming to put the kids first, is a single mother..... who dates


We've both been around the dating scene long enough to know that her children come first...your's are suppose to be an afterthought.

"So what"..is my response...there are other fish in the sea...more accepting of a single father/parent...this is the type of woman I seek.
 Imaguy
Joined: 5/18/2011
Msg: 39
Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 6/10/2011 7:47:19 AM
Definently not id say. Unless u have a millie in the bank it is hard to find someone attractive to be ok with the kids. I mean face it do u realy wanna date a girl with 3 kids if u have 3 kids wow! that would be hard if you made a relationship out of it. Unless you got plenty money. There are females out thetre bro but 9 times out of ten it is the females that u are proly not attracted to. I have the same issues dude. Either i get the player card or the runaway when the kid bomb comes. Anyhow good luck.
 godslilpixie
Joined: 1/29/2011
Msg: 45
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Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 6/13/2011 3:40:32 PM

Speaking for myself if a man feels he has to remind me that he has children and they come first. Then I feel like he has been through some sort of dramatic ordeal to feel the need to disclose this info to me. I don't go around saying 'Hey your cute, wanna go out? By the way my kids mean more to me than you."
See what I am saying...I know you love your kids. It doesn't mean you are a dead beat dad if you don't mention them.


I have a real issue with that. It kind of makes me mad actually hearing that kind of comment. How can you expect a parent to not talk about their children? It is a ridiculous expectation - it is a part of who they are - you either accept that it's a part of who they are or you move on - but making it their fault is nothing short of ignorant really...

If dads feel the need to remind you that their children come first, then it's probably because women have expected to come first. How unrealistic. My son will always come first to me and if I cannot be embraced as a mother as well as every other aspect that makes me who I am, then I don't want to be with that person. Being a mother is an incredibly important role to me, it has changed my life. Unfortunately, it seems that mostly just parents understand this.

I would have been happy to date a single dad before I had my son - but that's because I love children and I have a big heart to give. I'm looking for someone who has a big heart too and is a giver. I hate to say it but often prior to getting married and having kids, we are very ego-centric and selfish and I don't have a lot of time for that...
 BigBadNIrish
Joined: 1/31/2011
Msg: 50
Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 6/19/2011 5:25:16 PM
Well...if you want quantity over quality go ahead and date anything with a luke warm body...or, hold out for someone who truly does like your child and the thought of a child that they didn't birth....there's a gomillion women in the sea...and there's one that's right for you "and" your child.
 MistyckSweetpea
Joined: 11/23/2009
Msg: 51
Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 6/19/2011 11:41:03 PM

Well...if you want quantity over quality go ahead and date anything with a luke warm body...or, hold out for someone who truly does like your child and the thought of a child that they didn't birth....there's a gomillion women in the sea...and there's one that's right for you "and" your child.


That's a good way to put it. There's a bunch of women out there, but you have to wade through them to find the one that's right for both of you.

Personally I wouldn't mind dating a single father with children. At least then I then think that they might have a clue as to what it's like being a single parent.
 Domode
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 59
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Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 6/25/2011 11:24:51 AM
I'm an older man with four teenagers all great fun kids. I would not post pictures of them on website for two
Reasons they aren't looking for a date or a mother. Two they very good looking and I'm not gonna pimp
Off there looks. I'll stand on my own feet. I prefer there company over most of the screwed up uptight people
That claim they laugh all the time are on meds bi polar etc get drunk and act like morons. Enjoy your kids if
The right person comes along great. And another thought why are all these people looking because at least
50% of the world must be screwy! And the other half are just halfscrewylol
 AprilTaurus01
Joined: 6/25/2011
Msg: 60
Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 6/28/2011 2:22:30 PM
Im ok with single dad but the number of kids too could be something a woman thinks about 1 or 2 or 3 whatever her choice is on her comfort level
 Justmytypewriter
Joined: 2/8/2011
Msg: 61
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Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 6/28/2011 7:10:45 PM
Im a single father to 3 wee girls [...]
do women see this as a turn off?


Yes. Of course they do.

How would you even manage to spend time with a new person in your life, getting to know them and giving them the attention that they deserve, if you have to take care of three young daughters at the same time?
 Jacob2012
Joined: 12/21/2009
Msg: 67
Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 7/8/2011 12:38:00 AM
what do u think of mine? what helps women be comfortable to meeet?
 kshe40
Joined: 9/9/2009
Msg: 68
Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 7/8/2011 8:17:31 AM
I think some women do. Try to find women with children around the same age as yours. I'm having a hard time finding men that would date a woman with my age kids. I have an 8 and 11 year old. Most the guys that seem to email me all have kids over 118 or no kids at all.
 singlewithchildren
Joined: 7/9/2011
Msg: 76
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Do Girls Wanna date a guy with kids?
Posted: 7/17/2011 8:24:35 PM
My mom was in a relationship where her s/o had children and she immediately accapted them but her s/o always showed favoritism for his kids and my mom always included his kids i just want to say that both parties have to be willing ti accept each others kids and sometimes some kids can be more resistant than others but with love in our hearts and tolerance and kind words with a smile there can be positive change as time goes by but we as the adults are going to have to be the the ones to endure with love in our hearts
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