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 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 2
Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online ProfilePage 1 of 2    (1, 2)
*My last date said he couldn't tell if I was a man
Or a woman . Hoping for woman .

*my bed is constructed from shot glasses I've collected for a month.
It's a king size canopy complete with storage and shelving over the headboard.
It's pretty sweet. Do you enjoy design?

*Don't you just hate it when you fall in love on the first date and they don't call back?

*Do you think it's weird that people say I'm
Not stable yet I've always had a job. Not everyone can
Land 32 jobs.

*I'm thinking of a number between 1 and 1000. Closest number gets a date. ;)

*Do you have a problem dating someone who's been married 7 times?
I've actually learned a lot and I can bring it.

*My home life is improving. I only have 3 of my 12 children
Living with me. Don't worry, their dads help
With the others sometimes.

*Once I had a two year relationship and we never spoke. It was pretty cool.

*I almost have all of my tattoos lasered off. Do scars bother you, or areas that look like large bruises?
 U make it entertaining
Joined: 7/17/2009
Msg: 3
Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 6/24/2011 8:02:41 PM
^^^

I like that so-write!
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 4
Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 6/25/2011 11:43:03 AM
OH, I thought OP meant from our profile.

If we took bits from existing profiles we'd be on
here streaming them endlessly. * mock shocked look, blended with a mischievous wink*
 Skotch
Joined: 5/12/2010
Msg: 5
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Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 6/27/2011 7:09:24 AM
i dont like the guys having kids in their photos it really annoys me

About 80% of the women I've viewed that answered yes to having children have at least one picture of their kids (with or without the mother in it). Most of them say that the child(ren) are the most important thing in their life. A good number of them say their kid is very polite and well mannered (or something like it). About half of the ones with kids also say something about not looking for a father for them, just a good role model.

I should start taking down numbers on this, but yah. None of that stuff bothers me, just figured I'd point it out to you what I've noticed on women's profiles.
 SheLoud
Joined: 1/13/2011
Msg: 6
Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 6/27/2011 10:08:58 PM
I cant agree with you more, and its hysterical to read it. Ive thought it many many times and have passed many profiles with pictures of the family as their main pic. Like saying open my profile, dont I look hot with my happy family picture. Give me a mother ****ing break!!!! Come on what do you want to talk about? I don't mind when they are in the profiles (like the extra pictures once you open their profile, but NOT the main picture, I think it is lame and for someone trying to get pity or attention through their kids. Men don't get me wrong, it is a beautiful thing when a man takes care of their child. Do I sound cold? Please tell me I dont, I try to be ****ing nice too. Grrrrrr
 AprilTaurus01
Joined: 6/25/2011
Msg: 7
Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 6/28/2011 3:22:03 PM
*I'm thinking of a number between 1 and 1000. Closest number gets a date. ;)




I love that one that really made me laugh so classic
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 8
Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 6/29/2011 9:40:00 PM
April: the good part about this is that if the number is 19 and a guy you'd never want to meet chooses 18 and asks what the number is one can say oh Too Bad it's MUCH higher than that lol-

And if a guy one would like to meet guessed 999 I can say close enough
Lol
 mister_Harvey
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 9
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Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 7/1/2011 9:48:41 AM
The doctor said it would clear up but I like spots
 Awesome-Blossom
Joined: 6/4/2011
Msg: 10
Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 7/12/2011 11:48:10 AM
I think it's not okay if it's not their own kid. Come on men, do you really think that girls like kids so much that they'll wanna talk to you because you borrowed someone's kid for a picture?
 statesborocookie
Joined: 7/8/2011
Msg: 11
Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 7/13/2011 10:51:36 PM
"I'm a Scientologist. Gooooooo Xenu!"
 GWSmith
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 12
Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 7/14/2011 12:52:00 AM
Here's a couple:

I'm looking for a baby mama so I can prove to my parents that I'm responsible.

I only have misdemeanors on my criminal record.

I've been clean for 2 weeks now...

My hobbies include chewing on glass bottles because they taste like ouch.

I hope you like moms because I still live with mine!
 JUSTME470
Joined: 6/10/2011
Msg: 13
Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 7/31/2011 7:27:25 PM
The worst for me are the ones that don't bother to write a profile at all, but just write something like "I don't have time for this", or "If you want to know about me, e-mail me". Or referencing #8 in the OP, "I never thought I'd ever do online dating..."

If they don't really want to be on the site, why are they here?
 whatevs_meh
Joined: 1/4/2011
Msg: 14
Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 8/2/2011 8:56:23 PM
In the career line: "I have one" or "one that I love" or some other crap.
So what, you're a secret agent? A test pilot? A ninja?
Gimme a break - if you're a heart surgeon - cool on you. If you're a phone solicitor - also cool on you. You're not defined by your job.
 Ro0ki3
Joined: 7/27/2011
Msg: 15
Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 8/2/2011 11:03:41 PM
Here's a few:

1. By law, I think I need to let you know that I am a registered sex offender.
2. I LOVE KIDS!! (if it follows #1)
3. I don't do drugs, the drugs do me.
4. My fav movie of all time is Debbie Does Dallas
5. Hi, my name is Lorena Bobbit...
6. I need someone who can definitely protect themself. I have a CRAZY ex.
7. You might recognize me from the internet sensation called Two Girls One Cup.
8. My teef all jact up, but itz aight. I gotz me sum bling blangin grillz in my mouf.
9. I've never been intimate with a human before.
10. My perfect date involves a drive-thru. Don't worry, you can get whatever you want.
 bucsgirl
Joined: 5/13/2006
Msg: 17
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Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 8/3/2011 11:04:06 AM
So where did you copy/paste this top 10 list from? Please tell me it's not original....haha.
 RoadGhost
Joined: 7/29/2011
Msg: 18
Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 8/3/2011 1:59:53 PM
WTF is with you ladies and pepper spray?
Can i just please, please, please, go out on ONE date where i dont get sprayed?

 RoadGhost
Joined: 7/29/2011
Msg: 19
Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 8/3/2011 2:02:03 PM

My hobbies include chewing on glass bottles because they taste like ouch.


 Ro0ki3
Joined: 7/27/2011
Msg: 20
Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 8/3/2011 5:20:07 PM

So where did you copy/paste this top 10 list from? Please tell me it's not original....haha.


I don't know about his, but my top 10 was all original. I would guess his was original too bc his name screenwriter.
 Jazzzy
Joined: 10/17/2006
Msg: 21
Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 8/4/2011 4:04:09 AM
I read a profile once that stated, "Looking for a woman with the same interests: hunting, fishing, 4-wheeling and working on cars." I am sure that is going really well. lol
 meowsaidthetigress
Joined: 7/9/2011
Msg: 22
Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 8/4/2011 11:21:57 PM
As a first date description- anything he/she wants
Under drinking/smoking/wants children/occupation- prefer not to answer
I live in a large commune and the drugs are free.
My shrink lets me go home on weekends.
I only have six kids by four people and have only been married three times.
My disability and unemployment checks give me a great income.
I promise to be faithful when Im satisfied.
 Molly Maude
Joined: 9/11/2008
Msg: 23
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Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 8/5/2011 12:56:40 AM
things to NEVER write on an online profile:

1. I'm only abusive when I'm feeling insecure ...

2. I'm a social drinker ... I only buy whiskey, vodka, scotch and gin in the gallon jugs because I'm thrifty ... those empties in the trash have been saved up, they're not just from this week ...

3. I only feel insecure when my beloved doesn't do everything exactly the way I want things done ...

4. I have to check the rules again to determine whether I have to tell you I'm a registered sex offender or not ... I'm not sure about that ... I never know who I have to tell ... sigh.

5. I really love children ... if you have young children, that would be a definite plus!

6. I want to smother you with love and I will supervise everything you do, how you dress, what you say, think and read ...

7. I've been drug free for 17 days now ...

8. I have many varied interests and am looking for a lover who shares those interests!

9. I'm really only abusive when I'm feeling insecure ... oh! did I say that before? well, it bears repeating ...

10. I have several children by different lovers but you won't have to worry about seeing them because there are restraining orders preventing me from seeing them ...

my dream lover!
 Her1963
Joined: 1/28/2011
Msg: 24
Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 8/7/2011 6:31:04 PM
I had a man send me a message, so of course I looked up his profile. It was the most hostile profile I had ever read, going on and on about who women on this site were full of themselves and liars. And, he really expected me to reply!? He scared me, and I told him so!

So on the top 10, hostility about women on this site and past experiences with them, will probably NOT get you positive attention.
 Phoenyx311
Joined: 7/15/2011
Msg: 25
Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 8/10/2011 7:50:24 PM

Really 2 girls 1 cup! lol
yeah I would say thats more
something you bring up on a second date!
lol


lmao
 Simply_Me_83
Joined: 7/21/2011
Msg: 26
Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 8/10/2011 11:26:03 PM
I had fun reading these.. they were all super funny :)
 5357stk
Joined: 7/30/2011
Msg: 27
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Top 10 Things to NEVER Write In an Online Profile
Posted: 8/12/2011 2:26:01 PM
So true...'prefer not to answer' under wants children? I'm 54, it he says open or yes...why is he writing to me and he abviously needs someone 30 years younger.

Punctuation gentlemen! There is only 1 comma, not 2 and they go immediately after the word, THEN a space, not the other way around. (huge turnoff)

Spelling!!! Really? You're 50+ (huge turnoff) Proof read, its important.

And no, not looking for a boy friend (written that way).
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