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 Coxgirl
Joined: 5/24/2010
Msg: 1
Double standard on Oral?Page 1 of 49    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41)
Here's my question.. Now.. in my experience.. Men are ALWAYS down for recieveing oral.. in the car.. on the couch.. anywhere they can talk us into it at...

However.. these same men.. either refuse to return the favor completely.. claiming "It's disgusting" or intentinally go down for less then a minute..

Yet women are expected to completely finish the job as part of foreplay.. but men can't or won't?

I guess I just want honest opinions on the subject of expectations of oral.. both ways.. or why men are ok getting it.. but find giving it disgusting and wrong?

Thanks in advance:)
 Tvamp
Joined: 10/19/2009
Msg: 2
Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 7:06:00 PM
U hit the nail right on the head gurl . men def think it is thier GOD givin right for u to suck em off till u get lock jaw .. but u ask for a bit of the same they back off FAST!

selfish pri*ks I say . I love the taste of myself .. so what the problem ? !
 Coxgirl
Joined: 5/24/2010
Msg: 3
Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 7:08:58 PM
I know right? I have no issue with me being on his lips..

Women wouldn't slack so much in the head department I think if a man spent a bit more time "downtown" returning the favor..

I have only met very few men who enjoy it or dont mind it..

Most make up an excuse.. bleh.. such is life I guess. lol
 TDH49
Joined: 8/13/2010
Msg: 4
Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 7:16:11 PM

I love the taste of myself .. so what the problem ? !
Maybe you should be doing yourself under those circumstances.
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 5
Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 7:32:48 PM
However.. these same men.. either refuse to return the favor completely.. claiming "It's disgusting" or intentinally go down for less then a minute..

Seems bizarre. I've always gone down on women since the very first time I had sex. I do it in foreplay, as a break between other things and any time it seems like the thing to do at the moment. However, I've never had a woman actually ever ask for it, nor anything else for that matter. I'm pretty convinced that if I waited for a woman to actually ask instead of taking the initiative, I'd still be waiting. Maybe you should be a little more assertive in telling a guy what you want and tell him in detail how you want him to do it.

Yet women are expected to completely finish the job as part of foreplay.. but men can't or won't?

Well, make your expectations known and maybe that will solve the problem. Mind reading is too much work. If you want something, say so in plain English.

but u ask for a bit of the same they back off FAST!

If a woman got so bold as to merely provide a subtle hint, I think I'd be in shock.
 Restore71
Joined: 3/24/2011
Msg: 6
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Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 7:34:40 PM
You must not have ever been with the right guy. My experience is opposite of yours, she won't give, but loves to recieve. Myself I don't expect to get it (not to say I don't want it, if she wants too thats OK , otherwise I actually feel bad asking if she doesn't want/like it), but I like to give it, and like to make sure I finish the job...at least once.
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 7
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Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 7:34:55 PM
As much as the two seem related ....... they shouldn't be.
Sex is not a "tit for tat" game.
You give oral because you like to give oral......period.
If a man isn't giving you what you need sexually......then you aren't sexually compatible and you move on.
Plenty of men out there that do love to give a woman oral.......and aren't satisfied themselves until you are crying uncle! (God love 'em!)
 barefootkitten
Joined: 12/17/2009
Msg: 8
Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 7:35:21 PM
Maybe I've been lucky, but most of my partners have been more than willing to go down on me. Save for just one who refused before we ever slept together and said he didn't like doing it, I've never had a problem getting a man to go down on me. In fact, quite the opposite, that I've found men who would spend forever down there if I let them.

Maybe if you've found men don't spend a lot of time down on you, it's you, not them. After all, what's the common denominator?
 1234deleted1234
Joined: 10/8/2009
Msg: 9
Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 7:36:55 PM

Most make up an excuse.. bleh.. such is life I guess. lol


If you're getting the "blech" comment from a majority then maybe you need to do a little more house cleaning!
 Coxgirl
Joined: 5/24/2010
Msg: 10
Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 7:42:03 PM
No.. I never get that response from men.. (Bleh is just my own little way of.. like sighing.. lol) and never have any complaints in the house cleaning department either..

It could be however that I am not one of those girls who instantly explode the minute his tounge makes contact.. as many of my gfs claim to be.. eh.. Oh well.. lol

The basic question was just to find out about those gus who expect.. yet when asked for it in return.. refuse.. not men in general.. i should have been more clear.. lol
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 11
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Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 7:46:20 PM
Then those wouldn't really be "men" now would they?!
 Tvamp
Joined: 10/19/2009
Msg: 12
Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 7:55:15 PM
I can satisfy myself just fine thx bud .. and have had partners that enjoy it yes , and I am not shy lol .. however , most men to expect to recive , and don't wanna do unto u .
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 13
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Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 8:29:31 PM
Doesn't seem to be much to answer here, really. There are people of all sexual persuasions who like to receive but not give, or give but not receive this or that sexual "favor." So what?

Each human activity, especially during sex, is actually NOT RELATED to the reverse behavior. I know that seems counter intuitive, but it's really not so. It's no different from realizing that though one can enjoy BEING PAID, that one would not necessarily look forward to PAYING.

That a woman would enjoy MY MOUTH stimulating HER BODY, is completely different from whether or not a woman would also enjoy HER MOUTH stimulating MY BODY.

Now, if you were to ask why someone you know enjoys having their mate place their mouth on a part of their body, but finds it disgusting to place that same body part in their mates mouth, you might have a real conundrum to discuss.
 BlueEyedGuy1974
Joined: 3/20/2010
Msg: 14
Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 8:29:36 PM
I've never had a problem dining at the Y. I normally use it as means as foreplay. I've only once had a woman hint that she wanted me to go down on her. Most times though I'll use it as part of my routine in seducing her.
 Pingshooter
Joined: 3/15/2009
Msg: 15
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Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 8:35:21 PM

men def think it is thier GOD givin right for u to suck em off till u get lock jaw .. but u ask for a bit of the same they back off FAST!


Very broad brush you're painting with there..

You should say, "men I've known".

I think your man picker is out of wack.
 Stray__Cat
Joined: 7/12/2006
Msg: 16
Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 8:39:26 PM
Depends on the guy.
Alot of guys like me have no problem with that.
But you two apparently are dating guys that do.
Bad luck or bad choices in guys I guess.
 Vamperella
Joined: 4/27/2010
Msg: 17
Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 8:40:05 PM
I've never had that problem with the men in my life...so the question is rather a generalisation on men.

Just sayin
 Coxgirl
Joined: 5/24/2010
Msg: 18
Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 8:43:17 PM
Well, as I said.. I was hoping a man who actually felt that way would answer.. so I could get some perspective.. So I wouldn't leave a situation where I have pleasured a man (which I dont mind), dropped hints, flat out said I wanted it and got denied.. and not be upset, or harbor bad feelings bout the situation is all..

l
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 19
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Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 8:54:41 PM
Honey......this is a dating site.....
I think in all my years here I've only seen one man actually admit he didn't like giving oral sex!

You're going to get the same responses here you are in real life....
the all love to do it!!
Only way to find out if he means it......is by actually putting them to the test!
 Paddy_o_Lantern
Joined: 12/9/2009
Msg: 20
Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 8:59:11 PM
I have to say OP my experience is that there are more women who are happy to recieve but not so happy to give and fewer yet who will finish the task. If anything my experience is that the double standard on oral goes the other way. You may want to adjust your picker.
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 21
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Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 9:07:40 PM
Jasper........what leads you to believe it's "just sex"?
How do you know OP isn't talking about sex in a relationship?

whether's it casual sex......or relationship sex.......sexual compatibility is a must.
 SaucyArtist
Joined: 5/1/2010
Msg: 22
Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 9:19:28 PM
So is actually shoving his head down there bold enough?

I've done that.
 D4Engineer
Joined: 11/2/2009
Msg: 23
Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 9:30:21 PM
I think it should go both ways. She goes down on the guy, another time he can go down on her. It's kinky and there's no prob with doing it anywhere if you know you're not gonna get caught.
 Philhelm
Joined: 6/25/2007
Msg: 24
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Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 9:48:49 PM
I believe that there are three types of (heterosexual) men:

1) Those who hate going down on a woman.
2) Those who feel obligated to go down on a woman.
3) Those who *love* to go down on a woman.

I, for one, have always love the taste of a woman. Perhaps I have a bit of an oral fixation, but I am content with my head buried between a woman's soft legs. It's one of my favorite things to do.
 Big_fun_wave
Joined: 2/28/2009
Msg: 25
Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 7/7/2011 9:50:30 PM
Perhaps the men you are refering to that don't like giving it (as you say it) are not physically attracted to whomever they don't want to perform it on. Anyone who asks me how to tell or know for sure if your physically attracted to someone? I just ask them, if they would want to go down on the person their thinking of? If the answer is yes, then your defenitely physically attracted to them.
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