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 BlaineV
Joined: 7/13/2008
Msg: 1
5 minute rulePage 1 of 1    
I'm not sure if this is the right forum, but I've often heard that women will know if they are going to sleep with a man within the first five minutes of meeting him.

Now first of all, even though this is likely to get deleted, you should know that I'm not posting this, looking for tips on how to get laid. And quite honestly, the thought of sex never really crosses my mind with someone I've just met, nor do I judge anyone when first meeting them.

But I am looking for honest answers/opinions on this subject. So for the ladies, how many of you have actually thought about this? Or acted on it?

And what criteria did you base it on?

Also, if you've decided that the guy is 'sponge worthy,' how soon into the relationship did you do the deed, so to speak?
 _TALL_IQ2_
Joined: 2/10/2010
Msg: 2
5 minute rule
Posted: 11/4/2011 8:02:40 PM

I've often heard that women will know if they are going to sleep with a man within the first five minutes of meeting him.

Instant physical attraction happens.. More often than not for many people.
Now, whether they will actually ACT anytime soon on that acknowledged attraction, can be a HUGE hurdle for many people, men and women..
There are SO many reasons a person can conjure up NOT to act on that superficial attraction...
 Worbug
Joined: 4/23/2009
Msg: 3
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5 minute rule
Posted: 11/4/2011 8:08:53 PM
Lets face it, they can decide within 10 seconds if you do not pass the looks criteria. If you pass the hurtle, then it might take her five minutes, but usually we open our mouths be fore the five minute and it's over. LOL
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 4
5 minute rule
Posted: 11/4/2011 8:23:25 PM
I 've had that happen as well, Landra.

I almost said that there has to be some tangible something there that would tie me to the idea of being able to sleep with him at some point down the line or why would I consider dating him,,, IOW it's the natural progression in dating if it gets to the sexual point in a relationship.

But, I have had people I've dated who I simply didn't see in that context. I simply wanted to see how we got along, have fun, see what they were like over a few dates or much longer and sometimes that tangible something developed that allowed me to have the romantic rumblings for them.

I've had friends who I later developed an interest in to date, or vice versa, and hadn't never considered them in a sexual way.

Answer- it varies.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 5
5 minute rule
Posted: 11/4/2011 8:25:22 PM
In my case I can tell you if I could based on his looks but I'll have no idea if I actually ever will based on everything else - that comes with time.
 christyis4real
Joined: 7/6/2011
Msg: 6
5 minute rule
Posted: 11/4/2011 8:29:13 PM
I'm usually too nervous to even think about sex in the first 5 minutes after meeting. It usually takes me about 30 minutes.
 Lawlush
Joined: 6/30/2011
Msg: 7
5 minute rule
Posted: 11/4/2011 8:30:31 PM
lets say bar scenario..... lean into her ear ( she must know youre coming) and say something funny into it. Since youre cute, this would probably work.

and yes it is true, we do decided in the first 5 minutes, but its the same thing with being friends, or buying something. You just know.
 sassy0013
Joined: 10/18/2011
Msg: 8
5 minute rule
Posted: 11/4/2011 8:40:59 PM
For me, no as far as sex.

I do know within the first few minutes of meeting him if I'm physically attracted to him, but I've been attracted to a lot of different men that I've never slept with or wanted to because of other things about them that outweighed the attraction.

I know within 15 if he is someone that I want to see again. Then it goes from that point.

As far as how soon after I decide he is someone - that has all been different depending on time spent with each other and what I've learned about him.
 Kitten189
Joined: 5/25/2011
Msg: 9
5 minute rule
Posted: 11/4/2011 9:29:47 PM

you should know that I'm not posting this, looking for tips on how to get laid. And quite honestly, the thought of sex never really crosses my mind with someone I've just met


No,of course not,Op...................

I think if he's so damned hot that i feel like im losing my mind,is a pretty good indication for *me* in which case it's all about looks.
The reality is ive always wanted to be attracted to the guy,ie: his personality,intelligence,etc and none of that can be ascertained in 5 mins.
 114M3
Joined: 4/19/2011
Msg: 10
5 minute rule
Posted: 11/4/2011 9:41:37 PM
"5 minute rule"?? .... lol .. never heard of that "rule" .... but in regards to physical attraction yeap ... personally for me it doesn't take long to determine if I find him physically attractive or not. ... anywhere from first 5 - 30 mins of meeting ...... if the "fvckable factor" is based of physical attraction alone then let me be the perhaps far and few of women out there who will say "yeap I did him in my mind a few dozen times already" ...... not gonna lie about that just to make myself sound un-shallow ...

but whether or not I actually act upon that .. well it might help a bit to know more (personality, intelligence, temperament, etc) beyond his six packed, 4% bodyfat, 6' 4" ft frame ...
 no_1_bby
Joined: 5/3/2006
Msg: 11
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5 minute rule
Posted: 11/4/2011 10:56:12 PM
WTF is "sponge worthy" supposed to mean?

Takes me a whole lot longer than 5 minutes to decide that. Here's a little hint tho that I might be interested... if I don't tell you to get lost in the first 5 minutes, there may be a glimmer of hope.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 12
5 minute rule
Posted: 11/4/2011 11:26:21 PM

women will know if they are going to sleep with a man within the first five minutes of meeting him.


Lots sooner sometimes. If identifying an attraction to you is going to take more than 3 separate meetings, walk away after the end of the 3rd meeting, sleeping with her is not going to happen.
IF she wants to meet with you a 4th time, there better be something sexual going on, otherwise she is just out to squeeze you into her friendzone, and you're foolish enough to take a seat and be Sally [aka: Doormat].


And quite honestly, the thought of sex never really crosses my mind with someone I've just met,


Oh sure it does, especially if she is just smoking hot. A man never should be ashamed for thinking about sex when looking at a beautiful woman. Man-up.


nor do I judge anyone when first meeting them.


Yes you do. Its a called a survival instinct. No need to be ashamed about this either.
 theforumfiend
Joined: 10/21/2007
Msg: 13
5 minute rule
Posted: 11/4/2011 11:33:17 PM
Sponge worthy was from Seinfeld. Remember contraceptive sponges? They were popular then pulled off the market. Some women saved them for special guys.

It's not really sex that I think about when first meeting a man - I will wonder if I can see myself kissing him or spending time with him, but worbug beat me to the rest of it. No matter how cute or kissable the man can appear if he behaves like an azz, moron, etc he's killed it for me.
 MutedEnthusiasm
Joined: 7/8/2011
Msg: 14
5 minute rule
Posted: 11/4/2011 11:42:04 PM
it's not five minutes. it's five seconds.
and it's not that they know if they'll have sex.
it's that they know if they won't.

Same with guys. 99% of people we see - one glance and we know we're not attracted. It happens so fast that most people on the street barely register on our sexual radar.

When actually meeting a date from POF, the odds go up of course. But still, it's an instant gut "no" 90% of the time. And of the 10% remaining, deal-breakers topple 'em like domino-no-noes. When will I be loved (sniff)!
 ZachariahTicer
Joined: 9/22/2010
Msg: 15
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5 minute rule
Posted: 11/4/2011 11:44:27 PM
Too bad women don't give us a thumbs up or down at the 5 min mark to let us know the verdict. Save some time ^_^


the thought of sex never really crosses my mind with someone I've just met,

You're talking about the ones that didn't pass your 5 min rule?


nor do I judge anyone when first meeting them

Really?


Judgment: the process of forming an opinion or evaluation by discerning and comparing
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 16
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5 minute rule
Posted: 11/4/2011 11:56:32 PM
I might know within 5 mins. if I won't be having sex with him, ever, depending on his behavior, but to know within 5 mins. if I'll have sex with someone I just met 5 mins. ago? I wouldn't have any idea, I don't make snap decisions about how I feel like that.
 AintNoDeal
Joined: 2/3/2010
Msg: 17
5 minute rule
Posted: 11/5/2011 12:08:29 AM
OP - Now that you KNOW:
- how many ladies have actually thought about this, or acted on it
- what criteria they based it on
- how soon they did the deed

What are you going to do with this INFORMATION? Since you claim you won't use it to get LAID, how is knowing these answers going to make your life more pleasant?

Remember: You CANNOT use this info to select/tease/coerce/browbeat any women into giving you sex. And you CANNOT mention any of these details when you first meet a woman.

So tell us, WHEN and HOW this new information will come into play in your relationships with women? Perhaps you'll insert something in your wedding vows, like "I knew that she made up her mind to have SEX with me within 5 minutes!"

Did I guess right?
 Sweven
Joined: 9/29/2011
Msg: 18
5 minute rule
Posted: 11/5/2011 7:50:04 AM
I thought the 5 minute rule applied when we were cruising specifically for sex and therefore it'd be foremost in our thoughts.

[Oh my God, Woman IP, what an *adorable* H'ween costume.]

In that context -- yes, definitely.

I hope there aren't really that many people who routinely make decisions in 5 minutes which potentially will have long-lasting consequences --

but as said many times, we all make superficial judgements instantly even if part of it's unconscious.

And as said above, the screening OUT can be done in less than a minute, if there is a repellent present. Whereas who you let get next to you, is more complex and open-ended.

Heck, OP, even if you wear bug spray for cologne, talk only to her chest, and open with a brag about people you know who have big boats... there's gonna be somebody out there who will be digging you anyway for the person you are.

The biggest mistake is to try to cover that up.


 NuMeNow
Joined: 12/21/2008
Msg: 19
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5 minute rule
Posted: 11/5/2011 9:19:16 AM
OP: OMG...never heard that rule! It takes me more than 5 mins to decide what to wear in the morning...so I’m DEFINITELY sure it would take me more than 5 mins to decide whether or not I wanted to sleep with someone I just met ( lot more factors involved in that than wondering “Does this top goes with this skirt?”) The attractiveness factor... yes, the kiss-ability factor ...yes, the will I see him again factor... probably a little longer than 5 mins...but the knowing whether or not I will be having sex factor... NO.
 Aries_328
Joined: 10/16/2011
Msg: 20
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5 minute rule
Posted: 11/5/2011 9:26:11 AM
This applies to both sides doesn't it?

5 seconds to know if you want to spend the next 5 minutes with them.
5 minutes to know if you want to spend the next 30 minutes with them
30 minutes to know if you want to see them again

After that you are fair game for
3 dates to know if you want to have 3 months
3 months to know if you want to have a year
1 year to know if you want to have a commitment
1.5 years and you know if you really want to be married
3 years if your marriage is going to last
6 years to know if you can stand each other
10 years to get a divorce

:) Everything past 1.5 years I made up :) But since I see lots of divorced with 10 years or more I think that may be the upper limit. How can you find someone that can make it 20 years+ I have more ideas on how they built the pyramids than on figuring that out..
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