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 Dreamer1962
Joined: 11/11/2011
Msg: 1
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Why do guys on this Site..Page 1 of 1    
Say they are so busy but are on the site all the time!! How busy can you be..lol..Trust me I call them out as I see it. Yes I know you can be hooked on though your phone but really if you are that busy why even bother doing that? Or you have a really good conversation with someone when you hang up they keep texting you telling you what a great conversation , text you that night and then too busy to even write an email. Seems like most men on this site really don't want to be bothered. I have only been on this site a month and already thinking about deleting it. I mean I can't even have a good conversation with anyone they can't type more than 3 words in their emails! Its a joke!
 getanet
Joined: 6/10/2011
Msg: 2
Why do guys on this Site..
Posted: 12/9/2011 12:05:20 PM
The longer you are here, the more "interesting" things you'll see! Consider it a sociological experiment!

Forum Pet Peeve: "Why do guys do _____??" topics. The offending behaviors are on an equal opportunity playing field with the ladies too. Believe it!
 Elsewyr
Joined: 11/27/2011
Msg: 3
Why do guys on this Site..
Posted: 12/9/2011 12:10:19 PM
Why do girls on this site not know how to take a hint?
 Dreamer1962
Joined: 11/11/2011
Msg: 4
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Why do guys on this Site..
Posted: 12/9/2011 12:24:02 PM
Trust me that was not a hint ..he asked me to meet him that week ..but guys have to remember its the little things women are looking for..little gestures..a quick text, an email here and there..is that so difficult!
 Paderic
Joined: 2/23/2010
Msg: 5
Why do guys on this Site..
Posted: 12/9/2011 12:46:50 PM
Same reason guys (and girls) say they're busy when they actually aren't in real life.
 FNADude
Joined: 7/22/2011
Msg: 6
Why do guys on this Site..
Posted: 12/9/2011 12:51:43 PM
You've been here for a month .......... A lot of guys, good guys like me, have been here for years. Not because we are players but because it just takes that long.

So in the years that we have been here we have learned not to waste any time on dead end roads. So if you are not peaking the interest meter then we will tire of you almost right away, usually one or two emails at most.

My suggestion is to send a nice note (be sure to ask questions so he will see that you are expecting a reply) and if you don't get a reply - move on !
 02hdf150
Joined: 10/21/2011
Msg: 7
Why do guys on this Site..
Posted: 12/9/2011 12:57:24 PM
I hope you feel better after getting that off your chest. You're still a newbie so you'll come across a lot worse things i'm sure.

vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv
So just move on to someone who's taken the time to write you more than three words. I'm not seeing the problem.
 Dreamer1962
Joined: 11/11/2011
Msg: 8
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Why do guys on this Site..
Posted: 12/9/2011 1:09:52 PM
I do not lose sleep over it..I get plenty of emails my pet peeve is that they dont do anything to get my attention A three word email or even just one saying Hello isnt going to get you anywhere!..I dont even want to answer back if they can't have a normal conversation..And I would never be on for years..Good luck I am sure you will find someone just not on POF..
 getanet
Joined: 6/10/2011
Msg: 9
Why do guys on this Site..
Posted: 12/9/2011 1:11:27 PM

..but guys have to remember its the little things women are looking for..little gestures..a quick text, an email here and there..is that so difficult!


Sounds like the kind of thing a woman might appreciate from her *boyfriend* maybe not someone you are just first getting to know?

"Thinking of you" is a creepy text if you've only sent one prior text.
 Dreamer1962
Joined: 11/11/2011
Msg: 10
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Why do guys on this Site..
Posted: 12/9/2011 1:22:03 PM
What about a simple email..how are you today? geez..I know that is asking too much from some people..Just remember the little things count all the time it tells you really what kind of person you are ..
 That_girl*
Joined: 9/29/2008
Msg: 11
Why do guys on this Site..
Posted: 12/9/2011 1:38:10 PM
the simple things are the hardest to find..


ya i love the 3 word sentences as well..
what makes it worse is if you actually make it to phone conversation or dare be it in person they usually still have the yes no maybe so 3 word sentences an the creepy dead fish eye stare

just finding somebody who can hold any kind of a conversation is getting to be a pain let alone talking about wanting to meet up HA! some cant even make it to a second email or text how do you exspect that im just gonna want to jump an meet you if theres no sparks an intrest on paper or text..

i love how when you try to steer some off the conversation of sex or ask them about kids or what kind of relationship are they honeslty looking for all a sudden it becomes dead silence or they dissapear..an these are the ones who claim in thier profile to be looking for a good woman to date or intrested in meeting new friends it's so day an nite.

i just had a guy block me because i said i wasnt looking for just sex an that his emails where creeping me out an that he needs to go it from the other women he's been with..

he emails back an calls me a werido then blocks me i mean really what the hell as if i was the 1 coming off like a creep.
 NarcissusTemple
Joined: 4/23/2009
Msg: 12
Why do guys on this Site..
Posted: 12/9/2011 1:41:31 PM
You're essentially asking why all the wrong guys (for you) aren't doing all the right things (per your arbitrary criteria).

The guy you're looking for will pay attention to minutia.
So use the three-word emails and too-busy-to-write criteria as a sorting device and be patient.
By most people's experience, a month is not time enough to make a judgment about the quality of contacts on this site.
A month is leaning more toward impatient entitlement.
Besides, what's it costing you but a few minutes to be on the site?

In the mean time, take some initiative to contact men with more verbose profiles.
And don't bother trying to teach others what would work for *you* when they're doing what works for *them*
 christ on a crutch
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 13
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Why do guys on this Site..
Posted: 12/9/2011 1:58:54 PM
op, there are essentially two type of people on a dating website: those who are compatible with you, and those who aren't. the only ones you've managed to contact (in your whole month here) are the latter. you know they're in the latter category because they've shown you. you should be grateful, because by showing you, they free you from the risk of wasting time on them, allowing you to conserve it for the continued search.
 carptopus
Joined: 11/9/2011
Msg: 14
Why do guys on this Site..
Posted: 12/9/2011 2:01:54 PM

Why do guys on this Site..Say they are so busy but are on the site all the time!!

Because "too busy" is a handy excuse.
It beats saying "I am not interested in a relationship with you, so I reject you."
By saying "too busy" then it's more of you making the decision to dump them rather than them potentially causing conflict by flat out rejecting you.

Or because people have short attention spans. Having to pay attention to you means paying attention to you. They would much rather pay a bunch of shallow attention to others according to their convenience and schedule.

Or because they simply sign on at work, and leave the window up, occasionally just trolling profiles.
Because I have 2 minutes every 45 minutes or 10 minutes every hour where I don't have to be diligently working doesn't mean I am not busy. And it doesn't mean I want to sit there and chat with you during all of my free time.


Seems like most men on this site really don't want to be bothered.

IMO most people on this site don't want to be "bothered." Really, I don't think most people in existence want to be "bothered."
But on this site and online dating in general people tend to look for what they want, when they want it, and when they have it they want it to disappear until they want it again. Or IOW extensions of themselves.


I mean I can't even have a good conversation with anyone they can't type more than 3 words in their emails

Conversations should be had in person.
Emailing, texting, even phoning do not allow for decent conversation. Small talk and face talk, sure, but nothing with any real meaning unless you build it up in your head and then it's a big lie you tell yourself.
 bucsgirl
Joined: 5/13/2006
Msg: 15
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Why do guys on this Site..
Posted: 12/9/2011 2:31:13 PM
What you need to realize is that people can have a window open and not necessarily BE there all that time. I work on my computer, so sometimes I'll check my email and then don't always close the window immediately. So people may assume I spend a lot of time on here, when I may not have been actually "on" the site in a few hours.

Just a suggestion but you may want to ask yourself why you're checking to see when someone else is on or not. I know, just for me it can be annoying and sometimes an outright turn-off if someone is always checking to see when I'm on or what time I spend here. Remember, we're talking about virtual strangers (in more ways than one).

I think many members could save themselves a lot of grief if they just worry about what they're doing and forget on trying to check up on other people. Unless and until you get to know someone, it really seems as if someone has not much to do with their time, JMO.
 NickGhost
Joined: 2/15/2010
Msg: 16
Why do guys on this Site..
Posted: 12/9/2011 2:40:50 PM
Thats because a lot of us use the mobile site on our phones. Thats why we say we are busy, and why we dont type much.
 _TALL_IQ2_
Joined: 2/10/2010
Msg: 17
Why do guys on this Site..
Posted: 12/9/2011 3:51:08 PM

Say they are so busy but are on the site all the time!! How busy can you be..lol..

Sorry, busy now. ttl
 911love
Joined: 11/27/2011
Msg: 18
Why do guys on this Site..
Posted: 12/9/2011 4:26:22 PM
I think guys are just bad at communication. They don't like talking on the phone, or chatting, and I doubt they like texting or back and forth e-mails. They just want to meet.
 walkingtall38
Joined: 11/16/2011
Msg: 19
Why do guys on this Site..
Posted: 12/9/2011 4:45:29 PM

What you need to realize is that people can have a window open and not necessarily BE there all that time. I work on my computer, so sometimes I'll check my email and then don't always close the window immediately. So people may assume I spend a lot of time on here, when I may not have been actually "on" the site in a few hours.


This.

I'm the same way so while it may appear to some I'm logged in a lot I'm not actually surfing the site or people's profiles. Hell, I spend the bulk of my time on the forums when i am here anyways.
 BrockLee74
Joined: 9/9/2011
Msg: 20
Why do guys on this Site..
Posted: 12/9/2011 4:46:28 PM

I think guys are just bad at communication. They don't like talking on the phone, or chatting, and I doubt they like texting or back and forth e-mails. They just want to meet.


Not all of us.
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