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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > says to me 'let's not exchange Christmas gifts this year, I don't hav      Home login  
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 1inamillion59
Joined: 6/15/2011
Msg: 1
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says to me 'let's not exchange Christmas gifts this year, I don't have the money'Page 1 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
My boyfriend of 2.5 years says to me "let's not exchange Christmas gifts this year, I don't have the money". I was hurt by that. He has money to put into football pools during football season and has the money to go to a NASCAR race every year. My question is how should have I responded to that?
 laskoboo
Joined: 2/12/2010
Msg: 2
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Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 10:46:54 AM
how did you respond? by pointing all that out how he has money for what he wants to do?

I would have responded ok...
and he would not have gotten a gift.. and if yuor just dating, ( not married or living together) I would not have invited him for dinner either and maybe spend the day with my family, without him
 laskoboo
Joined: 2/12/2010
Msg: 3
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Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 11:00:20 AM
There are thoughtful inexpensive gifts... he is just being lazy...

yes I think you should let him know your vag has dried up ... thats just too funny
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 4
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Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 11:12:36 AM
Sit on Santa's lap and ask for a copy of "He's Just Not That Into You"?
 DrummingNut
Joined: 4/26/2010
Msg: 5
Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 11:37:19 AM
Well, it seems he sees the gift giving as a chore and he's just not into it.

If he didn't view it as a chore he'd maybe try to think of something creative instead of spending much cash... seeing as you've been together a few Christmas's already and have been giving gifts already.

But then I don't know you. Maybe you are the type who wouldn't like something creative and would fuss over a "poor" gift.
Maybe this is why it's a chore to him now, I don't know.

But whatever the reason, it's something he doesn't want to put any effort into anymore.

Hmmm, what would I do if I had a 'boyfriend' who said that... well, I'd NOT think "gee he spent such and such money on game tickets, he can spend some on me too".
I think I'd just say "okay" and let it ride.
But I would have much rather heard him say "I'm real low on cash, let's have fun this year finding gifts for each other at the Dollar Tree"!
 Paderic
Joined: 2/23/2010
Msg: 6
Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 11:37:46 AM
I hate the whole gift giving tradition. Christmas has turned into a holiday for retailers.
Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 11:38:20 AM
ain't it obvious? you go fvck some other guy for revenge.
 _PassionFlower
Joined: 11/27/2011
Msg: 8
Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 11:43:10 AM
you can respond any way u choose....it was probably a "test"....men do that stupid crap, just to see what ur going to say....he will probably get u something....not what u want, but something nonetheless...
 five-marie
Joined: 7/31/2011
Msg: 9
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Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 11:44:14 AM
And yet another person on here looking for someone else while in a relationship!
I've been broke, never been too broke to buy something, anything, to show my partner that I care/value him.
He could have said lets give each other something from the heart, not the wallet. He could have looked ahead and saved something, 25 bucks.
He choose to tell you that he couldn't be bothered to buy you something for Christmas. Is there a response to that? No. His actions say it all.
 1inamillion59
Joined: 6/15/2011
Msg: 10
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Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 11:48:29 AM
i think that is great idea.....thanks for the advice!!!
 1inamillion59
Joined: 6/15/2011
Msg: 11
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Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 11:50:36 AM
i'm not looking for someone else....i like to read the forums and i find it rather entertaining.............
 5150Rivergirl
Joined: 8/3/2008
Msg: 12
Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 12:33:41 PM

" Let's not exchange bodily fluids this year, my vagina just dried up "


hahahahahaha
 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 13
Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 12:43:22 PM

I always read someones profile before I respond to their posting. (learn a lesson)



^^^^Profiles are usually available to be viewed from the forums.
Even profiles that are hidden. Just sayin.

Before I'd make that leap, I'd check to see if her profile comes up
in a user name search from the profile page.

It didn't come up for me.

I'm sure my profile says things that I've not looked at in a while.
My profile is hidden and can't be found via the normal search.
 SweetLilGTP
Joined: 10/22/2010
Msg: 14
Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 1:04:17 PM
My question is how should have I responded to that?


*shrugs*

I'ma go with: Kicked him in the nuts?
 BLoNde__ANgeL
Joined: 9/20/2011
Msg: 15
Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 1:23:38 PM
DUMP HIM
what a selfish pr!ck...even if he was broke, he could make u something or give u a massage, etc.
u r NOT a priority to him
do not be surprised if he DUMPS YOU
you deserve better
he deserves sh!t
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 16
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Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 1:29:49 PM
It sounds like a red flag, OP. He's either taking you for granted, or no longer into you.

Now, my SO and I do not exchange gifts for any occasion, but we are constantly doing things for each other, and will often shop together and urge the other to get something if they like it and it's within our budget. So, every day is special, not just particular holidays or anniversaries.
 christyis4real
Joined: 7/6/2011
Msg: 17
Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 2:19:35 PM
Is Christmas to you all about gifts and what you do and don't get? If so, don't get him anything and withhold sex for a few weeks. That'll teach him.

If Christmas is about spending time with one another and your families and enjoying the Christmas season, then tell him it's ok. You understand that he doesn't have the money but he can make up for it later. Enjoy your time together and have fun.

Whatever is important to you.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 18
Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 3:47:15 PM

My boyfriend of 2.5 years says to me "let's not exchange Christmas gifts this year, I don't have the money". I was hurt by that. He has money to put into football pools during football season and has the money to go to a NASCAR race every year. My question is how should have I responded to that?

I'd be relieved I didn't have to worry about it and cross him off the list of things to do, but that's just me. IMO, Christmas is for kids. The only reason adults feel they have to buy everyone stuff, especially in relationships is because they watch so many commercials telling them they're wrong if they don't. The gift is your relationship being so successful, don't lose sight of that. Take each other out to dinner or spend time with each other over the holiday to celebrate it. Go somewhere together and do something for others.
 Stray__Cat
Joined: 7/12/2006
Msg: 19
Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 3:48:06 PM
I would tend to agree with most of the advice above.....except.....
if you are the type that always expects a killer gift....and he can't do that this year....
then YOU are being selfish.
Would you be satisfied with a birdhouse he made?
Or a dinner?

I would do what he suggested and just not get him anything.
To get bent about it is your choice.
 Pingshooter
Joined: 3/15/2009
Msg: 20
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Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 5:01:25 PM

My boyfriend of 2.5 years says to me "let's not exchange Christmas gifts this year, I don't have the money". I was hurt by that. He has money to put into football pools during football season and has the money to go to a NASCAR race every year. My question is how should have I responded to that?


Tell me how you feel, coming in second to football and NASCAR?

Your picker is broke, you need a new boyfriend, and picker of boyfriends.
 BLoNde__ANgeL
Joined: 9/20/2011
Msg: 21
Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 5:16:21 PM
He has money to put into football pools during football season and has the money to go to a NASCAR race every year.
his gambling comes ahead of you
u look great- get a new guy for 2012
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 22
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Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 5:32:21 PM
Did he elaborate further on his statement? Not enough details to draw a conclusion here.
 MOTORCYCLEMAN4U
Joined: 2/12/2008
Msg: 23
Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 6:12:30 PM
Has he heard of Visa lazy ass.
 U make it entertaining
Joined: 7/17/2009
Msg: 24
Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 8:01:10 PM

i'm not looking for someone else....i like to read the forums and i find it rather entertaining............

U do make it entertaining!

lol

I would not stay with someone like this.
It is only going to get worse.

A present does not have to be anything expensive.
It could be a made gift.
It could be a certificate for something to do together that does not require a lot of money.

I used to get amazing gifts.
Thoughtful gifts.
I remember one valentines day I was staying away from chocolate
(because I am a self admitted chocoholic)
My husband purchased me a Chocolate magazine ...
so I could still indulge in my mind.
How cool was that!

He made me homemade cards
Poems that made me smile
Scavenger hunts, where I had to search for my gifts
He made even a 99 cent gift something that was special

Your bf is a tool.
This will continue on being an issue.

Find a man who appreciates you.
 carelesswhisper00
Joined: 1/11/2007
Msg: 25
Christmas
Posted: 12/21/2011 8:44:12 PM
There are 365 days in a year and he has had plenty of times to put back some money to get you something. If you have both exchanged gifts previously, I would say he is just being lazy and doesn't want to be bothered. There are many other ideas for those that aren't in the gift giving mood too, so his excuse doesn't cut it.
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > says to me 'let's not exchange Christmas gifts this year, I don't have the money'