Notice: Forums will be shutdown by June 2019

To focus on better serving our members, we've decided to shut down the POF forums.

While regular posting is now disabled, you can continue to view all threads until the end of June 2019. Event Hosts can still create and promote events while we work on a new and improved event creation service for you.

Thank you!

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Off Topic  > Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Yankee again
Joined: 1/26/2008
Msg: 2
Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
Female answer here
I hate when someone I don't know does that. It has happened to me a lot.. I find it one step above stalking.

Send him a note or use the meet me feature make some effort. You want results and a date you need to make effort.

Oh and when guys do that to me I email them if nothing comes of it I delete the favorite they made of me. It is all on how you use the programs here.....


Go fishing... stop sitting baiting ....you need to stir up the waters.
 Greatcatch12345
Joined: 5/2/2011
Msg: 3
Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!
Posted: 1/11/2012 5:09:19 AM
it means nothing to me...i feel its just something she wants to add to her list and usually they are located far away or outside my age range, or other parameters, etc..etc..
If you are shy on here...i cant even imagine what you are like in person. Simply write something like this, " Hi, i liked your profile, how's your day/week going"? If he is interested, he will respond.
 JerseyGirl2008
Joined: 12/27/2007
Msg: 4
Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!
Posted: 1/11/2012 5:13:41 AM
LOL...I hardly find it "stalking" since it's one of the functions here on POF. I think favorite-listing IS a way of passively-aggressively letting someone know you're interested without having to reach out and make initial contact. I see it as a "wink" in a way - showing your interest without being overly intrusive.

If you favorite-list someone and they don't contact you, it may be because they don't get email alerts telling them they've been favorite-listed. You can opt out of getting alerts like that, and there's no other way for them to KNOW you've put them on your list unless they look in their "who favorite listed me" list. Lastly, it's also entirely possible that they DID see you put them on your favorites, but for whatever reason, they opted not to pursue contacting you.
 Paderic
Joined: 2/23/2010
Msg: 5
Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!
Posted: 1/11/2012 5:25:55 AM
I don't check very often to see if anyone "favorited" me. A couple of times I've sent an email to someone on the list and haven't gotten a reply. It was one of those WTF moments. So now I basically ignore it.
 BLoNde__ANgeL
Joined: 9/20/2011
Msg: 7
Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!
Posted: 1/11/2012 5:39:44 AM
maybe u have to get more assertive & start emailing little notes...
 VacationGuy234
Joined: 8/1/2008
Msg: 9
Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!
Posted: 1/11/2012 5:54:10 AM
If a woman puts me on her favorites list, it means one of two things, she likes my profile or she likes my forum posts. Unfortunately, these are two very different things. How do I handle this? If I have not seen her on the forums, I take it as the former.

It would help of the site had a friends list and a favorites list, but I see the point in not making that distinction.

So, to answer the question, I like it when they put me on there, but I reserve the right to remove myself if I feel there is nothing there.
 Paderic
Joined: 2/23/2010
Msg: 10
Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!
Posted: 1/11/2012 6:18:34 AM

I message anyone interesting on here that adds me to favs with that 2 line message and my reply rate on those is over 80 percent. And has held that way for YEARS here.


So far, I'm zero for three...
 BoonDockSaint73
Joined: 3/29/2010
Msg: 11
Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!
Posted: 1/11/2012 6:24:58 AM
I will often ""fav"" a girl before msging her...


when girl's fav me....

if they are hot...

i take it as a big hint they want me to say hello to them.....

so I will


if they are not hot.


i say nothing to them.
 guymeetswoman
Joined: 12/24/2011
Msg: 12
Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!
Posted: 1/11/2012 6:55:32 AM
It's fine with me. I have a lot of women I put as Fav's but didn't contact yet.
 Pinky127
Joined: 1/7/2012
Msg: 14
Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!
Posted: 1/11/2012 7:12:49 AM
Op,id say forget the Faves things and just send 'em an email!!!

Its really NOT hard to do and im positive the guy would appreciate it.
Go on.
I dare ya
 TedJMill
Joined: 7/6/2005
Msg: 15
view profile
History
Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!
Posted: 1/11/2012 7:35:11 AM
I use Favorites as a way of noting women I might want to contact at some time in the future. It's for my use rather than as a message; I'd use it the same way even if the favorited person wasn't notified. Although, if someone I favorite does look at my profile and contacts me, I guess that's a bonus.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 17
view profile
History
Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!
Posted: 1/11/2012 7:46:57 AM
I also use the "favorites" as a way of sort of bookmarking guys that really intrigued me for one reason or another, but I'm not really ready to initiate contact with them (or anyone else) yet. I might be ready tomorrow, though, and it saves me the digging through the dozens of profiles to find them again.

I don't see where it's stalking, it's just profiles that are put up for public view anyway. I thought stalking was when someone creeps into someone else's private life where they're not wanted.
 kari135
Joined: 9/1/2009
Msg: 18
view profile
History
Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!
Posted: 1/11/2012 7:51:06 AM
I collect profiles that I find interesting, either because of something that person has posted in the forums, or they've written what I consider a good one, or something they do interests me. They are of both men and women around the world. I also say in my own profile that I collect them and if they want to know why, to send me a message and I'll tell them. (I will say I no longer pick ones that simiply demonstrate they know the difference between 'fine dinning' and 'fine dining' though.)

What I don't get is why someone will add me to their list and then not respond to a message from me - there's one now who lives just a few miles away. Another one is on many of the same sites I'm on, and he's fave'd me on every single one - but has never answered a single message on any of them.

I never bother to contact anyone who isn't a forumite, I've gotten either ignored - at best - or ranted at and blocked, for having the temerity to actually contact them in the first place, I guess. And a lot of those I would contact have such restrictive mail settings I can't send them a message.

As for that Meet Me thing, that's a total waste of time. The only ones who've bothered clicking on me for that are either ones that weren't interested in meeting me before I moved to Tucson, or have mail restrictions that exclude me so I can't contact them, either.
 astrosky
Joined: 2/6/2005
Msg: 20
view profile
History
Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!
Posted: 1/11/2012 11:53:34 AM
I see no problem with putting someone on your favorites list - its a sign you like them (people who think that is "stalking" are pretty paranoid, IMO). Like other people said, its like a "wink" on other sites. If someone wants to be notified of who their admirers are, they will go look and if there is mutual interest then they can say something. I have plenty of people who put me on their faves but so far there haven't been any that I feel mutual interest for. I think deleting yourself from someone's list is rather rude though - you revoke their right to like you? I periodically clean out the people I have favorited, especially if I see they have viewed my profile and expressed no mutual interest.
 TraveliciousGuy
Joined: 9/17/2011
Msg: 21
Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!
Posted: 1/11/2012 12:17:38 PM
I take it as a compliment when someone adds me to their fave list.
Since I have no pics, it means they read my profile and liked something about it enough to "bookmark" me, even if they don't send a message, although it is even better when they do follow up with a message.

It's not anything near stalking.
 arwen52
Joined: 3/13/2008
Msg: 23
view profile
History
Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!
Posted: 1/12/2012 9:33:10 PM
I rarely add anyone to my favorites list but when I do, it's usually someone who I like to read in the forums and then it's an easy way to look them up.

I don't care who adds me to his favorites list. Why should I? And don't think that just cuz you add someone they should message you. After all, you didn't take the time to message them.
 Aristotle_Amadopolis
Joined: 12/8/2011
Msg: 25
Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!
Posted: 1/14/2012 5:14:58 PM

I am a bit shy, so if I like a guy's profile, but I feel too shy to make first contact, I sometimes add him to my 'Favs'... but I never get a response to this!

That is because there is no set rule.

If you like someone, send them a note.

There is nothing to lose, other than an opportunity to meet someone.




So guys, tell me how you feel about a lady you have never contacted adding you to her 'Fav's' please....

If I am interested in her, I will add her to mine.

Otherwise I may or may not delete.
 Stray__Cat
Joined: 7/12/2006
Msg: 27
Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!
Posted: 1/14/2012 5:47:16 PM
I am always complimented when a woman adds me to her fav pile.
I always write to her if she is attractive and interesting.

In other threads, the ladies seem to be the opposite on that.
And claim they hate for guys to fave them out of the blue.

But I still do fav some in spite of that.
The reason is I like to use the "VIEW USERS SIMILAR TO " button
and see a whole crowd of similar ladies to check out.
So I fav a few different but interesting types to get a varied selection to email.
 TooShadows
Joined: 9/26/2008
Msg: 28
view profile
History
Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!
Posted: 2/23/2012 8:49:05 AM
I only add someone to my favorites list if they've messaged me first,or replied after I've messaged them.

I often wonder why people add me to their favorites list,especially if there's really no good reason to that I can see. For instance,a 21 year old,very thin Asian lady from Seattle recently added me to hers. We have nothing in common that can see,and her filters prevent me from sending her a message to ask why. It would be different if someone were closer,but I still wouldn't write first.

If you're really interested,write a darned message. That's the way a person shows interest here.
 TraveliciousGuy
Joined: 9/17/2011
Msg: 29
Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!
Posted: 2/23/2012 10:57:25 AM

So guys, tell me how you feel about a lady you have never contacted adding you to her 'Fav's' please....


I like it, since I take it as a compliment that she liked something about my profile enough to want to be able to find it easily again.

I like it even better if she also sends a message.

 pittguy37
Joined: 8/16/2008
Msg: 31
view profile
History
Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!
Posted: 2/25/2012 1:28:44 PM
I don't mind it at all. I figure that if a woman has "favorited" me (not really a word, but guess I'll run with it), then she has some interest in me. I understand that many women don't want to make that first move because of tradition or whatever which is fine, so to me this is letting me know that she sees me from across the smokey room and is interested in speaking to me.

As for me, I actually use it for a very different reason. I actually use it as more of a bookmark, I may come across a profile that I find interesting, but may want to reread it or maybe the words I want to say just aren't coming to mind at the moment. So, I'll favorite them and then go back later and write a message. Once I've written the message I remove the "favorite" designation. Of course, this may or may not work against me, but I'm sure that is a different discussion entirely.
Show ALL Forums  > Off Topic  > Men Answer me about using 'Favorites' usage please!