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 StraylightRunn
Joined: 11/1/2011
Msg: 2
Confidence or Realistic?Page 1 of 1    
Not all guys who are ugly and confident can get a lot of women, but all guys who get a lot of women are confident. Got it?
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 4
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Confidence or Realistic?
Posted: 2/7/2012 10:41:01 PM
Straylight has expressed the math essentially right. If you understand subsets, you'll get it.

More directly, the answer to your question is "no." It is not true that only the confidence of a person matters, and that face, body, and personality don't matter.

What would be much more accurate to say, is that everything matters, and so if you have something extra in any of those categories, it will help you make up for problems in the other areas.

There are very "hot" looking people who nevertheless lack confidence. They tend to have a very easy time attracting others to pursue them, based on their looks, but their lack of confidence causes them various problems, including indecisiveness, which in turn can result in them losing attractiveness to some who flocked to them for their looks at first. But they will still have an easier time than someone who is more confident, but looks terrible.

Some very self-confident, less-than-striking people, do very well finding mates. That is not a result of the "magic" of self-confidence, it is the direct result that those people's confidence allows them to meet and get to know others more readily, to perform various life tasks calmly and more successfully, to learn skills more easily, an so forth.

Bottom line, there is no simple set of rules or principles or procedures that anyone can follow to get the person who they want to attract, to want them. That I am a old guy, wont make someone looking for a younger guy want me, no matter how much confidence I exude.
 ITWYLD
Joined: 11/15/2011
Msg: 5
Confidence or Realistic?
Posted: 2/8/2012 12:05:39 AM
You are 19 and have grey hair????? I call BS! TROLL

DELETE ASAP!
 Whisky_River
Joined: 9/12/2010
Msg: 6
Confidence or Realistic?
Posted: 2/8/2012 10:38:24 AM
There's a fine line between confidence and arrogance.
Some people men and women who consider themselves...good looking are so arrogant...full of themselves... to the extreme it's hard to "love" anyone else.

I think...it's a combination of a lot of things...that are attractive.....there has to be some substance...genuinely nice.....considerate...have empathy...confidence....and yeah...and you will be more attractive.

But....everyone is different...go figure

 JstaNicegirl2
Joined: 1/19/2012
Msg: 7
Confidence or Realistic?
Posted: 2/8/2012 11:52:59 AM
That is somewhat true. But where I live and work a good looking person will get a job over a not so good looking person in a second. I work in a Law office and they want someone attractive to represent them. I have personally not seen any corelation to looks and confidence in my life with my friends and co workers. The best looking girls I know feel they are unattractive and the heaviest woman I know thinks she is the pretty and thin. I think its important to know who you are realistically. If you have confidence it can only be a good thing. But confidence doesnt mean aggressive rude behavior like I have seen from posters on this forum site.
 SweetLilGTP
Joined: 10/22/2010
Msg: 8
Confidence or Realistic?
Posted: 2/8/2012 11:59:03 AM

Some very self-confident, less-than-striking people, do very well finding mates. That is not a result of the "magic" of self-confidence, it is the direct result that those people's confidence allows them to meet and get to know others more readily, to perform various life tasks calmly and more successfully, to learn skills more easily, an so forth.


Confidence also helps folks act ina trusting AND trustworthy manner. it's amazing what ones lack of trust in situations and themselves can come across as to others.



 moonwalkerman
Joined: 2/19/2008
Msg: 9
Confidence or Realistic?
Posted: 2/8/2012 12:18:38 PM
I am a man, so I can only speak from a male perspective. It might be worth mentioning what confidence with regard to women actually means. I am pretty confident about my skills, but that doesn't mean anything when it comes to attraction. In my experience, confidence in this area means absolutely not being intimidated or awestruck by a woman.If I look at the most beautiful woman in the world and half-jokingly ask her if she has gained weight recently, she is basically sold. It sounds weird, but that it how it usually works. I think it has to do with the fact that, like it or not, women want to be led by a man, they want him to be in charge, so they can feel safe, safe enough to build a little nest. It is pure biology. If you treat her with too much respect, she gets tired of you very very quickly. The secret to a working relationship is to make sure that she looks up to you and admires you. Feminists will kill me for this...but is is the truth.
 Adam Taylor
Joined: 5/11/2006
Msg: 11
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Confidence or Realistic?
Posted: 2/10/2012 7:28:34 AM
Confidence always helps, just make sure you don't push it to the point of being c0cky, as that can be a big turnoff.

*Stupid thing not letting me post short messages even though I made my point succinctly.*
 Greatcatch12345
Joined: 5/2/2011
Msg: 12
Confidence or Realistic?
Posted: 2/10/2012 7:35:55 AM
u gotta be able to back up the confidence...
 TOEDWY
Joined: 5/30/2011
Msg: 13
Confidence or Realistic?
Posted: 2/10/2012 7:52:24 AM
I wouldn't say that it is only confidence that matters but it goes a long way. Of course personality plays into it... and people shouldn't lose sight that confidence doesn't mean there isn't weakness. I prefer someone who knows themselves in both strength and weakness and is confident / secure enough to talk about both openly and honestly.
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