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Show ALL Forums  > California  > Have never met anyone on this site :(      Home login  
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 richardcard82
Joined: 3/3/2008
Msg: 1
Have never met anyone on this site :(Page 1 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
Been a member of this site for 4 years now and i have not yet gone on a date with any women.... ive messaged many many girls and women.... different age groups and different races . just have not had any luck, conversations dont even go more than 3 messages.... I like younger girls.... and even older women (40's) nothing has worked for me.. And im not a perv im friendly and sweet, and i always compliment on how gorgeous they look in their pics. Any of you guys had the same issue ?
 Pete2205
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 2
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Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 4/6/2012 1:57:06 AM
Your profile seems ok Richard..No slease or anything anyone can take offence by..

It could be where you live or how your initial conversation starts - So hard to tell. I dont put all my hopes on POF and while I have had many exchanges on here I find the same as most people of either sex - Expectations and reality dont go hand in hand.

Your still a young bloke - If I was you I would be out there more getting to places where you are likely to meet people. I have had a few invitations to meet up but as yet have not taken one up either dues to distance or because I havent been attracted enough not just by looks but by personality.

I am chatting to someone and in regular phone /text contact who seems really nice but socially we are miles apart - It may go to the next step but if it does we will both know if and when were ready.

Four years IS a long time though - If you have really been trying to get a relationship going on here and not even had a date then perhaps there is a reason but only those you have spoken to in the past can tell you.

Perahps you should contact them and ask why they were reluctant to meet up - Explain that your concerned that perhaps your coming over wrong . I do wish you luck but hell if I know the answer to this one
 irish_smackie
Joined: 3/13/2012
Msg: 3
Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 4/6/2012 4:59:43 AM
Speaking as a woman in her 40s, I wouldn't date you because you are simply too young, so I will give you my perspective about your profile.

You look sweet, but I'm not sure at your age, that will be helpful, so don't emphasize that quality by describing yourself that way in your profile. Girls do NOT want a male version of themselves, regardless of what they say. When guys label themselves "sweet", a girl may interpret that to mean "without a backbone". Play up the level of "fun" you want to have with a girl, and play down the "romance". (Sorry, I am being honest here.)

You are good-looking enough, but I would lose the faux-hawk. (Maybe this is a generational preference?) Also, the picture of you wearing your plaid shirt is the best of the bunch. Maybe you should consider making that your main photo? Also, I would get rid of a couple of your less flattering photos. You don't need so many, and if they aren't GREAT shots, they aren't helping.
 richardcard82
Joined: 3/3/2008
Msg: 4
Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 4/6/2012 8:20:48 AM
thanks for the advise , i guess nice guy truly do finish last...... i guess you cant expect much on a free dating site...
 Wonder5750
Joined: 1/30/2012
Msg: 5
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Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 4/6/2012 8:28:17 AM
Nice guys are a great commodity. Any woman that has been with a not nice guy is looking for them. So its not that so much as we also want someone that has what we lack. A person to make up the balance so to speak. I don't want someone like me, I want someone that is strong where I am weak, and will let me be strong where they are weak. :) How hard can that be? lol
 Ken_The_Man
Joined: 3/9/2011
Msg: 6
Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 4/6/2012 9:02:03 AM
What do I get for getting you laid?

First thing you're in Cali man and you're super pale, hit the beach and if you can't just go to a tanning bed for a month will do wonders for your skin and you won't look like a late night weirdo.

Next as the older lady above mentioned take out some of your pics, the one looking like nosferatu is doing you no good.

Another thing put some preferences on your profile. Don't message if just looking for sex, dont msg if msged someone looking for sex. It'll make you seem less desperate.

There's a start for you.
 irish_smackie
Joined: 3/13/2012
Msg: 7
Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 4/6/2012 9:15:57 AM
"Older lady"? Ouch! Ahh well... at least you didn't call me "ma'am". :-D
 richardcard82
Joined: 3/3/2008
Msg: 8
Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 4/6/2012 7:08:04 PM
Thanks for the responces everyone, been taking some of your advice into consideration.... and changed my profile a bit.... I dont message women to get "laid" just looking for someone to have conversations with. As for the the gentleman from AZ,....man what are you doing on a dating site??? you look more like a guy that goes to clubs and doesnt look like you would need a site like this, But thanks for the advise as well,
 richardcard82
Joined: 3/3/2008
Msg: 9
Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 4/7/2012 12:08:51 AM
Thanks, its a start.... :)
 Wonder5750
Joined: 1/30/2012
Msg: 10
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Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 4/7/2012 9:07:53 AM

Stay away from older women, they have too much experience for you,
they will chew you up and spit you out:)


We won't hurt you... want a cookie? lol
 wonderwoman1031
Joined: 11/17/2011
Msg: 11
Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 4/8/2012 12:45:34 AM
You have gotten some great advice about tweaking your profile, here is some more:) First, yes, please remove some of your pictures. Most of them are of you doing nothing. Women will wonder if you ever leave your house . Leave your profile pic and the one of you dressed up outside. Try to get a friend or family member to take some pictures of you next time you are at a family function, beach, etc. Definately put some filters on for your mail settings. This will let woman know that you do know what you want in a potential mate. For example, you do not smoke or do drugs. Are you willing to date a smoker or someone who takes drugs? If not, add that to your filters. Are you willing to get involved with a married woman? If not then put that in your filters. But more then anything, you really need to remove the "any age is welcome." It does make you seem that you are so desperate you will date any age woman. Woman your age may not be bothered if you are open to dating older women but believe me they do not want to compete for your attention with a woman 10 years younger. I have a 20 year old daughter and she is way too immature to date a man nearly 30. If I read a man's profile, who is about my age and his age filters say he is open to dating a woman who is 10-20 years younger, which I see all the time with men in their 50's, I immediately think "why would he even give a woman my age the time of day when he obviously is comfortable with a woman who is so much younger?" Also, you really need to list some of your hobbies, your interests, the kind of music you like. When women read a man's profile they want to see if you have any common interests. If I read a profile and we do have a common interest, if I decide to message him I will usually bring that up to start the conversation. Last, you should really change your first date idea. First dates with those we meet on the internet are rarely romantic. Keep in mind that meeting a strange man in person is usually nerve wracking and can be a little scary. Women need to feel safe. By you saying that you want a romantic dinner and cuddling is putting too much pressure and could be a turnoff for a woman . She will think your expectations are too high. First meets should be talking, getting to know each other so the 2 of you can decide if you want to plan a real first date. Whether it is a casual meeting in a coffee shop or even if you two decide to go for lunch or dinner. Let her know you are willing to do what makes her feel safe and comfortable with no pressure. Remember, when it comes to online dating, all we have to get someones attention is our pictures and our profile. So make them interesting. Good Luck...
 richardcard82
Joined: 3/3/2008
Msg: 12
Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 4/9/2012 5:47:15 PM
went ahead and took modified profile more, removed another pic of me thats way old, I dont really take many pics so pics of myself are the only ones i have. Since i run a small business I dont go out much. But ill work on some different pictures. Thanks to everyone for the help
 Wonder5750
Joined: 1/30/2012
Msg: 13
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Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 4/25/2012 7:49:40 AM
^^^^^ folks that love life is huge. :) You don't have to be brash or bold, just like who you are, then find someone that likes who they are, then share! Damn is it that easy? lol
 rod1919us
Joined: 11/3/2011
Msg: 14
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Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 4/29/2012 1:53:23 PM
I've met 5 women off here in a very short time frame. I still talk to 2 of them here and there...or I keep in touch with them. I email back and forth now and I don't have a very lengthy profile. Follow my example and see where it gets you. *shrugs*. I mean if I can do it...YOU can do it...I'm black and short. So the odds are heavily stacked against me. You're white. You suppose to be snappin' your fingers and sayin' "let's go".,,especially with all these Asian women out here. We all know Asian women prefer white guys. As the old saying goes...may the odds be ever in your favor. lmfao!!!!!
 rod1919us
Joined: 11/3/2011
Msg: 15
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Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 4/29/2012 1:56:57 PM

I dont put all my hopes on POF


Exactly...it's just something on the side. I go out on the weekends.
 richardcard82
Joined: 3/3/2008
Msg: 16
Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 4/30/2012 10:27:27 PM
Thanks for the motivation, I did tone down my profile from all the sappy love stuff like i was initially suggested to do, Still really havent been on here lat lately its whatever for me now..... By the way im actually Mexican , not White lol, I appreciate all the responses and i realize that its also how you make yourself look on the site... I agree that you have to make yourself sound like a happy person reguardless if your a pretty boy or not, Ill keep trying to better my attitude and have a more positive outlook :)
 rod1919us
Joined: 11/3/2011
Msg: 17
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Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 6/20/2012 2:18:22 PM

By the way im actually Mexican, not White lol,


Damn, the odds are supposed to be even better in your favor when it comes to dating. Especially with all these Latinas on this site
 MotoGPatrick
Joined: 9/5/2011
Msg: 18
Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 6/20/2012 9:50:36 PM
Honestly online dating sucks... I am mostly just here for the forums and entertainment these days. I suggest getting out and making the most of life. By this I mean live and enjoy life your way. This will put you in the kind of mood that it charismatic and very contagious. To me it seems that many women are looking for their vision of perfection and checking off hundreds of nit picky yes or no boxes. When you are out in real life someone who is confident, secure and clearly enjoying life is someone that they notice over all the little details and want to get know.

I have started chats that led to dates at all kinds of places, coffee shops, bass pro shops, a horse tack and feed store and the cliche of all of them the grocery store. Always 80% or better responses..

 rod1919us
Joined: 11/3/2011
Msg: 19
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Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 6/21/2012 2:11:37 PM

that is so true man asian women only like white dudes unless you pay them i have slept with a few of them and i got them all by paying them so all i could figure is they think all wht people are wealthy so not true lol


Not necessarily,

Through my experiences, I've found that Japanese women tend to be more willing to date bruthas. I hear black Marines tell me about Japanese women hitting on them all the time. I also have seen where Filipina women are more willing to give black guys a chance.

But overall it's no different than German women liking black guys in Germany. I hear a lot of black men getting mad play in Brazil. And I also heard from an associate of mine attending USC that many Arab women like black guys on the low, but they can't do anything because of their religion and strict parents.
 rod1919us
Joined: 11/3/2011
Msg: 20
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Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 6/21/2012 2:19:14 PM

I gotta agree with you, alot of asians !and the brothas, no love lol but hey the white guys can keep em, ive never really been attracted to them anyway! however in one year ive met atleast 10, and im talking looks, career, but obviously nobody is perfect so you know they had mental issues lol, but over all ive had some good and bad encounters. although i must admit the white boys gotta be cleaning up, because im noticing the real gorgeous girls are making them a request. even the latinas are on them, and if your a latino and you dont look too latino where its easy for them to tell and your descent its game over lol.


Yeah that's true. Outside of the Filipinas and possibly Tai women...there's not a great selection of good looking Asian women *in my opinion*. There's not many Korean or Chinese women I can think of at the top of my head that I'd be trying to date...especially at the University of La Verne. I know of a few cute Japanse girls, but even them, there's not that many I can think of that's HOT. And the ones that are have been Americanized. Their main attractiveness is that they're fun sized.
 richardcard82
Joined: 3/3/2008
Msg: 21
Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 6/30/2012 12:25:02 PM
Wow its been a while since i posted haha. But yeah the Asian girls i see the most of are Filipinas and most of them are very picky and shallow to say the least. I do see them more attracted to Black men. I have managed to go on a couple of dates with this one girl. Funny thing i didnt even meet her on POF it was on another dating site that for some reason it doesnt let me say on here lol . Really beautiful Latina had had a blast on both dates. Sadly she said she was talking to her ex again, Yeah i know bullshit excuse but atleast i made a new friend to hang out with. Yes i know i was Friendzoned but cant hurt to have new friends. I dont really come on here anymore i try to be more active and been dieting and exercising a lot more trying to feel better about myself.
 Cobra977horsepower
Joined: 4/16/2012
Msg: 22
Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 6/30/2012 2:57:25 PM
Its almost humorous that everybody has this 'problem' of not dating/meeting someone.
I've been on dates and met lots of women from POF, i've had sex with some of them, and I still have a PM box full of women wanting to get with me!
You guys need to improve your game, or get out of it altogether!
 MotoGPatrick
Joined: 9/5/2011
Msg: 23
Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 6/30/2012 5:36:30 PM
Most of us are not looking for horny mentally unstable freaks that think "wrap your legs around my neck" is a good headline.
 Cobra977horsepower
Joined: 4/16/2012
Msg: 24
Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 6/30/2012 6:13:57 PM
But it is a good headline!...its worked quite a few times!!
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 25
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Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 6/30/2012 7:08:37 PM
It's catchy I will say that...I'm sure that it appeals to some.

I'm thinking about changing mine ...

I've met a few people on POF, have a date next week with one and met another woman through another dating site.
Life is good.
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