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Show ALL Forums  > UK forums  > rape..      Home login  
Joined: 7/16/2008
Msg: 8
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rape..Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
I have to admit that I don't really think about rape unless it is specifically brought up. Maybe some women are more aware if someone close to them has been raped, or down to where they live. I have been known to put myself in risk situations simply because I don't think of the risk. I am even guilty of ignoring warnings - I used to walk my dog in the town park, alone and at night when it was dark. I wouldn't have stood a chance but refused to let fear stop me doing what I wanted - not very clever really.

I have spent most of my life in low crime areas so I guess I am pretty naive to a lot of what goes on (although I like to think I am not ignorant of it). These things always happen somewhere else. I don't even personally know anyone who's house has been ransacked - I did get my garage broken into but pretty much knew who and why that happened because of what was stolen. So apart from comparitively minor things, I guess I have been shielded.

In all honesty, I'd rather be the way I am than always be worrying that something terrible will happen. I'd hate to live with the constant worry. Sometimes, thanks to media coverage, it seems that there is a rapist around every corner but if you work on % of population that get raped, it's actually pretty small.

No doubt I would be someone that would react worse than many because of the way. In saying that, I would rather be stabbed or robbed than be raped. To be stabbed and robbed is, I imagine, much easier to accept, it's often not personal, it's not a prolonged violation of your body, which often includes violence as well.

I'm sure if I were ever to be raped, it would colour my view of men and restrict my interaction with them as well as my lifestyle. Being stabbed and robbed would just make me a bit more careful.
 Jo van
Joined: 5/23/2009
Msg: 9
Posted: 5/3/2012 8:54:34 AM

Sometimes taking all those precautions won't help if the man who rapes you lives with you...

Marital rape, of a wife by a husband, was only made a crime in 1991 in this country, there are still a great many countries where it's not a crime.

The marital rape exemption was abolished in England and Wales in 1991 by the Appellate Committee of the House of Lords,

That's one of the main reasons I oppose the concept of "TIH", it actually advocates it.

I think it's very sad that this is a real worry for women, and equally sad, that some men still do this.

One of the paradoxes I've never fully understood, from conversations with many women, is the recurring theme of "rape" (Usually by someone very attractive, but in one case, "by a tramp"...[?]) as a sexual/masturbatory fantasy, for some (more than I imagined) women.

I can only assume that this completely safe and purely private (and consensual) fantasy is linked to an attraction to dominance and physical strength in men.
None the less, I have been shocked to hear it. Consequently, I have struggled when asked, in those 'role play' situations, as I find any 'resistance', (even if feigned) to be a complete 'turn-off'.
The biggest 'turn-on', (for me) being the knowledge that the woman is 'gagging for it'. [Med. Term]

Maybe some men are just 'wired wrong'...?

Joined: 2/17/2011
Msg: 17
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Posted: 5/3/2012 12:35:00 PM
Dont have anything to add to this except that 'wiring' was mentioned. Many years ago i was reading psychological profiles on convicted sex offenders, and i cant remember the percentage, but it was very high..... that the offenders either didnt realise what they were doing is wrong (kind of genetic throwback) or it was a miscommunication. Now not wishing to include the no is yes argument here as its irrelevent to his discussion.

But the wiring things could definitely imho be a factor.

On topic i dont think i have ever even considered being raped as a risk, so it is interesting from a psychological point of view how the sexes will behave different when in public. As for marital rape, oh boy what a can of worms, not only for the the sick **stards that do it, but also for the sick **stards that falsely accuse someone out of spite or revenge. Must be a nightmare for the police to sort out.
Joined: 11/5/2008
Msg: 19
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Posted: 5/3/2012 3:21:51 PM
Msg 27:
I think you'll find that women going to the police with false accusations of all sorts are quite common. Not naming the accused is also for the fact that women have been known to guild the lilly more than just a little bit.
I seem to remember a case where two women picked up a bloke and took him home for a session, then accused him of rape just to cover their backs in case their boyfriends found out. I myself have spent the night in a cell because of a woman lying to the police. It happens. Regularly.
 matt e
Joined: 12/28/2007
Msg: 20
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Posted: 5/3/2012 3:51:28 PM
Im not sure how anyone can say one type of rape is worse than another and for the same reason I dont think you can say one type is or is not worse either. As has been said earlier with male rape. It is also often argued that Rape by a stranger is worse than a partner.
To come to any conclusion you would need to have a way of qualifying the affect to the victim. You would also need to be able to compare the trauma. If one victim was able to get on with their life and deal with the emotional affect well does that mean the attack was not as bad as someone who couldnt?
Joined: 11/5/2008
Msg: 21
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Posted: 5/3/2012 5:21:41 PM
It is, again thankfully, very unusual.

It's not.

"According to former Colorado state prosecutor, Craig Silverman, up to 45% of rape accusations could be fallacious. He went on to say that he was amazed by the amount of false rape accusations that are made by women.

“During my time as a prosecutor who made case filing decisions, I was amazed to see all the false rape allegations that were made to the Denver Police Department. It was remarkable and surprising to me. You would have to see it to believe it. Any honest veteran sex assault investigator will tell you that rape is one of the most falsely reported crimes that there is. A command officer in the Denver Police sex assaults unit recently told me he placed the false rape numbers at approximately 45 percent.”
Why do you think that is then? You certainly dont see anywhere near as many men trying to get their pound of flesh with the assistance of the police.


The initial story:
"As a serving policeman, there are several things I am not allowed to talk about.

There are plenty of operational secrets we cannot discuss, but I’m not referring to those. I’m talking about the taboo subjects. The ‘detection’ rate for rape is one of these.

It’s very frustrating to sit and listen to pundits talking about the low number of rape convictions in Court, when as police officers we all know what lies behind these poor numbers.

For example, I couldn’t possibly tell you that out of every ten rapes which are reported in Ruraltown, at least eight turn out to be nonsense. To be fair, eight out of ten of everything reported at Ruraltown police station is nonsense, why should rape be any different?"
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