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Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > Havent experienced an Orgasm: is she the only one?      Home login  
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 tensail
Joined: 10/15/2009
Msg: 6
Havent experienced an Orgasm: is she the only one?Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
ive had gf who hadnt had 1, n some i gave em 1, n others didint.
 tensail
Joined: 10/15/2009
Msg: 7
Havent experienced an Orgasm: is she the only one?
Posted: 6/13/2012 11:02:20 PM
his fault cause she deosnt cum- u r joking, sonds like u wnet to feminist school, nxt ul;l b saying his**** 2 small- oh dear.
 kickingfate
Joined: 9/10/2005
Msg: 12
Havent experienced an Orgasm: is she the only one?
Posted: 6/15/2012 2:10:47 PM

One thing she is not is overly religious LOL.....I agree that she doesnt know her own body bcause she is one who thinks masturbating is repulsive....I advised her to get over that and learn her own body ....
(thanks for responding)



If she hasnt taught herself what makes herself feel good with masturbation how is she going to effectively communicate that to her partner? I know its not an impossible task but masturbation is natural, a great way to discover yourself and each other and can be EXTREMELY romantic thing for a couple to do together.

I don't think she's going to find the satisfaction she wants if she doesnt learn to let her hair down and realize sex is supposed to be fun and an adventure and explore each other with hands , fingers, mouth, toys..whatever.

She really need to lock her self in a room and have a good long session with her self, pleasing herself and she might be shocked at what she actually discovers about herself.

I personally find masturbating WITH a woman not only intensely exciting and enjoyable but very educational. watch how she pleases herself and when and be aware of her "rythym" she uses to get herself to orgasm..maybe this is what her partner needs as well.
 shesawetnwild1
Joined: 5/20/2011
Msg: 15
Havent experienced an Orgasm: is she the only one?
Posted: 6/17/2012 8:54:59 AM
I can completely relate to your friends problem.

I was very shy and inexperienced with my first boyfriend. We were two years in a highly sexual relationship without my having had an orgasm. He was patient, very giving, adventurous, trying new things, toys, positions, places...and he became frustrated because I didn't have an orgasm. I didn't care because I was enjoying what we were doing, and I didn't want him to feel bad, but had to admit I didn't really see what the big deal was with sex! I couldn't even fake it for him because I didn't know what was supposed to happen!

One day he was performing oral with me on top on the couch (maybe it was the raised position of his head?) it happened so suddenly, hard and fast, and I leapt up off him like he had burned me! That was when I realized that I had been fighting it all along unconsciously! Whenever it started feeling really good and the tension started building I got scared and fought against it. I didn't know what was coming but I was afraid of it...of losing control. Learning how to relax and allow it to happen was the hardest thing I had ever had to learn to do. It required a trust I didn't even know I was withholding from him.

Perhaps your friend is afraid to just 'let go' and allow the sensations of her body to just take her there. I would suggest they have a nice romantic evening together starting with a bottle of wine and a massage.....slow and relaxing and lower her inhibitions a bit. Maybe her first orgasm will have a chance to sneak up on her!!
 shesawetnwild1
Joined: 5/20/2011
Msg: 17
Havent experienced an Orgasm: is she the only one?
Posted: 6/17/2012 3:00:24 PM
No, I hadn't had an orgasm through masturbation before that either. Like I said, I couldn't even fake it for him because I didn't know what was supposed to happen! I must have been fighting it in myself all along as well. I was 22 before it happened that first time. I guess I was all tied up in my hang-ups!!
 sedonaroses
Joined: 3/16/2012
Msg: 21
Havent experienced an Orgasm: is she the only one?
Posted: 8/4/2012 7:55:46 PM
If she's had a hysterectomy, she may not be able to achieve a "typical" uterine orgasm. This procedure has left many women with the inability to achieve orgasm in the same way that other women do. She may only be able to achieve a much milder clitoral orgasm due to this surgery. She may also be very disconnected from her body and need therapy to really be able to relax. Often if a women has experienced rape or sexual abuse, she is also unable to relax and trust and therefore cannot achieve orgasm. There are many factors.
 drewcornwall
Joined: 5/31/2010
Msg: 22
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Havent experienced an Orgasm: is she the only one?
Posted: 8/4/2012 8:04:47 PM
its a sad fact that some really nice girls can not achieve pure pleasure, either on thier own or with others. I have my own stories, but no doubt, it will come good in the end, with a great partner.

"cloud 9"

x
 FireMon
Joined: 2/27/2012
Msg: 23
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Havent experienced an Orgasm: is she the only one?
Posted: 8/4/2012 8:36:30 PM
It can also be caused by chemical imbalances, which many women experience as a result of depression, hormones, or medications (which is worth looking into if the problem persists), but it sounds like your friend's case is of not knowing her body well enough.
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