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Show ALL Forums  > UK forums  > Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?      Home login  
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 Forrest Grump
Joined: 6/2/2007
Msg: 3
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 *rem*
Joined: 11/5/2008
Msg: 7
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Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 6/26/2012 3:11:24 PM
I don't buy lottery tickets and i don't message many people or expect an answer mainly because Its not cricket to ask a woman "do you date black men?". So dont feel too bad.. I'm consigned to the ugly bin for being black AND ugly so things cant be too bad for you.
Must say i have a lot of respect for the OP saying it the way she sees it
 jaqi
Joined: 2/2/2008
Msg: 9
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Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 6/26/2012 3:18:21 PM
I've had a few messages that start with 'I'm know I'm not in your league............'

That has to be one of the most put off lines ever.... how does he know what 'league' I am in ... I would like to think I'm not in one atall but it just bugs me because I then think the fella isn't going to be assertive enough for me!
 DAFT_DOG
Joined: 4/23/2011
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Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 6/26/2012 11:02:21 PM
god i lost count long ago ! hahahaha :O)
 jaqi
Joined: 2/2/2008
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Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 6/27/2012 5:38:35 AM

This is a interesting post because most people would have backed off someone at least once in there life that they considered themselfs "not in there league


I very nearly did this once... I had a date and had text my daughter that I was on my way to meet a gorgeous guy and was in two minds not to go as I thought he was 'out of my league', she text back not to be so silly, that I was gorgeous and to go and have a good time, which I did.

I was round his last night and we were musing over the fact we had now been friends for 8 years!
 jaqi
Joined: 2/2/2008
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Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 6/27/2012 10:57:09 AM

Hmm but if there is no such thing as "out of your league" then nobody would ever reject someone purely based on looks (assuming that's what we are referring to here).


Imo the two aren't linked... just because someone doesn't find another person attractive and rejects them doesn't mean that they are not necessarily in the same league. I have had guys tell me I 'look' too classy for them which I would be more inclined to think was referred to as a league issue. There are some very gorgeous looking guys on here ~honest, there are~ but it doesn't mean I particularly fancy them, so, if I reject them am I subconsciously saying they are out of my league?
 ComplekCity
Joined: 1/17/2011
Msg: 25
Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 6/27/2012 11:00:46 AM
Ever not messaged someone because they came across as being too full of themself ?

All the time.
 xkayleighmariex
Joined: 7/17/2007
Msg: 27
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Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 6/27/2012 12:06:36 PM
I have the same thing... I've not messaged anyone on here at all, ever!... I'm a big girl and often think who i message won't reply because of this. So i just sit back and wait for people to come to me (not the best way must admit)... that way i know i won't be rejected... Seeing this has made me think though, might aswell give it a shot, not gonna loose anything if no reply... Well that's my opinion anyway :-) x
 jaqi
Joined: 2/2/2008
Msg: 28
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Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 6/27/2012 12:38:02 PM
Kags ... I have no idea why you are worried about messaging fellas cos you look great ... you have a gorgeous smile, beautiful skin and don't look anywhere near your age! Guys in your area must be a little short sighted to say the least!
 joanne85
Joined: 1/6/2011
Msg: 29
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Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 6/27/2012 12:42:32 PM
Glad its not just me! Another big girl with no confidence here!! Lol
 *rem*
Joined: 11/5/2008
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Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 6/27/2012 3:26:23 PM
"how did he get her" or for that matter "how did she get him" Reality is that loads of couples exist that are "supposedly" a mis match lookswise, and it's not always the case of pretty young gold digger on the arm of a rich old ugly guy


Agreed. I see this all the time, including someone i work with.. He's not ugly but in my opinion his GF is very attractive.
Some women like a "bit of rough" (yes I hate that term too) but maybe we're all missing the point on this thread?

Sometimes in real life you can meet someone and simply miss the opportunity to try to take things a bit further, then never see them again and regret not making a move. But realistically this website is like shooting fish in a barrel... If you keep shooting you'll hit something probably sooner rather than later. But if you keep your powder dry and dont squeeze the trigger the result is guarranteed.. No fish for supper!

I tend to avoid women who's profiles say they're into motorbikes and Led Zeplin etc..
But if you say you like Skrillex and Damian Marley i'd think... hmmmm Interesting.

Truth is i rarely message women because I look for things that tell me we have a lot in common... and there aren't many women in MY league. That doesnt mean my league is any higher or lower than anyone elses though

Moral of the story?
Shoot first, ask questions (of yourself) later
 DAFT_DOG
Joined: 4/23/2011
Msg: 37
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Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 6/27/2012 11:47:21 PM
I usually have a little laugh to myself when ever someone tells me that old saying.. "there`s someone out there for every one"..

If mine`s out there, then i reckon she`s ex SAS, cos she`s bloody good at escape and evasion !! hahahahaha :O)
 DAFT_DOG
Joined: 4/23/2011
Msg: 39
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Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 6/27/2012 11:57:48 PM
^^^^ i`ve been buying a ticket "from time to time" for years !

guess what ! hahahaha :O)
 eve1962
Joined: 12/26/2009
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Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 6/28/2012 8:18:10 AM
Hi Lucie - I looked at your profile and I think you look lovely and, also, a very well written profile. Plus, you say you're going to the gym to "get fitter" - good on you. Glad you didn't say to get slimmer.

One of my friends is quite overweight and she had two of the most gorgeous boyfriends I'd ever seen!! And one of the best looking blokes I have ever gone out with - honestly, girls were always looking. Well, he was the most boring, vain, self-centred person I'd ever met. He got dumped pretty quickly and couldn't understand why :-)

Another one - he pursued me (I'm just Miss Plain Average). Told me he was a fireman, not that it matters. But turned out he was a stripper!!!! My mate met him after I'd only known him two weeks and she said "I'm sure I've seen you somewhere" - turned out she had seen him in action stripping. He got dumped too - shame, he was a nice bloke, but I just don't like liars.

Anyhow, message whoever you want to and don't worry if you don't get a reply or, if you get a nasty reply, then breathe a sigh of relief because if anyone can send a nasty reply about weight or looks, you've had a lucky escape.

Good luck xxx
 Epikblazn
Joined: 6/20/2006
Msg: 42
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Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 6/28/2012 11:44:39 AM
You never know who will like you, don't ever go by looks, I can walk the streets and look at couples and wonder wow "these people are different colors, shapes, sometimes saw an actual dwarf date someone way taller," so to that conclusion I never lower myself or think I'm out someone league, I highly doubt that really short person though they'd never be able to date a normal size person, cause we all human and we're gonna die the same way. So just think to yourself, well if that person doesn't like me oh well whatever, its better to just have that mindset :)
 UkSammie
Joined: 11/6/2008
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Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 6/28/2012 3:17:59 PM
Yes, alot of the time.
 DADWITHSWAGG
Joined: 10/14/2010
Msg: 56
Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 7/2/2012 4:39:03 PM
your so true about that...
 Marquis_de_Michaelmas
Joined: 10/23/2008
Msg: 63
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Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 7/4/2012 3:15:31 AM
I think this whole league business is based on self insecurities. Perhaps here more so than face to face one gets judged on looks so much more certainly initially there is a bigger element of self blindness. What is realistic is that you find some one you like and get on with rather than have many ill conceived expectations.
 bexonlegs
Joined: 4/11/2007
Msg: 66
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Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 7/5/2012 1:21:29 AM
I message funny, witty things and still dont get replys lol
I would message someone if it took my fancy (regardless of whether or not they THINK they are above my league) and well i think its their loss if they cant beneath a persons body, after all beauty is only skin deep and you need a whole lot more than looks to make each other happy ;0D
 Jo van
Joined: 5/23/2009
Msg: 67
Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 7/9/2012 2:00:06 PM
As I'm not looking, I seldom partake in the many 'dating orientated' threads, as I really don't have the same motivation as others, who post in earnest, and it would be churlish to mock...
However, I can speak from some experience on this topic, because in my day, (a looong time ago ) I was often the bloke being pointed at, when other blokes elbowed each other, and growled "WTF is SHE doing with that w@nker"..???!!!
I don't subscribe to the notion of "leagues", but I have managed to find myself on the arms of impossibly beautiful women, on more than several occasions.
I'm not what I would call 'good looking', in the classical Paul Newman kind of way, though I'm aware that I have an appeal to a very small proportion, I've never been able to see it myself.
The truth is, that in real life, people (particularly men) seldom approach really beautiful women, or treat them the same way that they do, everyone else.
Now it may be, that in 'real life', just having the 'nuts', or perhaps being cheeky enough, to consider yourself 'worthy', in public might, in itself, be an attractive enough 'quality' in a person, to more than compensate for any perceived 'visible imperfections in appearance'.
Confidence can often put another person 'at ease', and be an attractive quality. Or sometimes, it can generate repulsion too. It's really about that elusive 'chemistry'. That indefinable quality, which makes a person seem attractive to one, and a PIA to another.

But all of ^^^ that is in real life, face to face, and usually quite 'publicly'. There is an element of 'bravery' involved, on all sorts of social levels.

Here, any one-handed typing Troglodyte can bang out any number of 'Reader's Wives'-inspired "suggestions", to women who they would be too afraid to look directly at, in real life, even if they stood right outside their mum's cave, and they were looking at them through their fingers...
Here, they have the anonymity of the internet.
So until someone does for internet dating sites, what 1471 did, for the "heavy breather", you ladies, who are pleasantly tolerable, will have to put up with messages, not just from people "not in your league", but also the creature from 20 Thousand Leagues.....
 drewcornwall
Joined: 5/31/2010
Msg: 68
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Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 7/10/2012 8:04:23 AM
"A moderately attractive woman with a brain is a massive turn on. A stunner without a brain is completely unattractive to me"

Here here.
 Richard_of_York
Joined: 12/4/2010
Msg: 72
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Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 7/11/2012 11:18:26 AM
There's not really much reason for not writing to someone who you think is 'too good' here. What's the worst that can happen? No reply or a dismissal. And because 'good' is so subjective, they might really like you.
 Richard_of_York
Joined: 12/4/2010
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Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 7/11/2012 11:28:35 AM
^^
"it's not going to help you if you fell out of the ugly tree and faceplanted every branch on the way down"
lol!
 Jo van
Joined: 5/23/2009
Msg: 77
Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 7/11/2012 12:18:25 PM

now i finally understand why i never get chatted up in tesco's... or anywhere else.. :-)

You should try the Co-Op, Nx.
The woman on the meats and deli' counter, doesn't stand on ceremony! (Actually, she could do with standing on something, she's about 4'10", and equally wide, and she wears one of those special "meat-handling" trilbies, in white....)
She's always letching at me, although, to be fair, she always washes her hands, before handling my salami. Which is nice.
But the look she gives me, as she bags it, or slices it, makes me shudder, just a little bit....

I think it's completely different on here, to "real life".
An attractive woman here, will get 'carpet-bombed' with messages, every day.
IRL., there's the fear-factor. Nobody wants to look stupid, by being blown out, ignored, or worst of all, laughed at.
<------ Seee..? It hurts, doesn't it..?

If you have no success in the Co-Op., try walking about with one breast completely exposed.
And when someone points it out, say " SH!T!! I've left the baby on the bus again!!!"

This will "break the ice". (Unless it's the freezer section, obviously )
HTH.

 matt e
Joined: 12/28/2007
Msg: 81
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Ever think someone is out of your league and not messaged them?
Posted: 7/11/2012 2:05:56 PM
My friend has taken this one step further. On monday he met a girl who messaged him a week or so ago. She asked him out. When she arrived she was prettier than her photo's and I think he didn't feel he matched up. So after one drink He suggested they call it a night as they had work the next day. He sent her a text to say he had a nice time which she replied to but he wont have it that theres a chance and wont get in touch again. I think its a shame as he obviously thinks a lot of her.
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