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Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > Relocating and starting over      Home login  
Joined: 5/15/2011
Msg: 1
Relocating and starting overPage 1 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
As I approach retirement age, I started thinking it would be smart to spend the last 10-15 years of my career life getting established in the area I would like to live when I retire so that I will have community roots there. The economy has made housing a lot more affordable in parts of the country that have a more favorable climate and tax structure for retirees. My questions for the forum are: Has anyone else had some experience with this and how did you go about it? And if you were dating, how did that impact you? Any advice would be appreciated.
Joined: 6/4/2011
Msg: 2
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Relocating and starting over
Posted: 6/30/2012 2:16:08 PM
I did so last year! I moved to Jacksonville, FL. Climate? Housing Economy? All ok! Heck, my brother lives here to boot! His wife has dementia and turned for the worse. I am glad I moved here and he can used the help. As far as dating went, how does out the window sound? However, I joined POF when I moved and the forums family has welcomed me with a straight jacket & a padded cell. What more can a man ask for? LOL
Joined: 6/25/2012
Msg: 3
Relocating and starting over
Posted: 6/30/2012 3:31:13 PM
I've moved to several cities so far and I will probably move again, the company I work for offers me a promotion and I take it. I don't have any kids but I have relatives all over the US so it's easy for me, if you have family nearby and grew up there then I would imagine it would be difficult to move. I was married one time and after the divorce I asked myself "why am I still living here?" so I moved to be closer to family. There are single people everywhere so I say "go for it".
Joined: 3/6/2011
Msg: 4
Relocating and starting over
Posted: 6/30/2012 4:44:43 PM
in the next year i'm thinking of moving to ann arbor,, mi. it suits me a university town. lots to do maybe chat up a i like the liberal nature of the city, and being around some college kids. i will see tho can be expensive too....
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 5
Relocating and starting over
Posted: 6/30/2012 5:48:49 PM
I'm as about as close I can get to my "spot" of heaven of which I hope to live when I quit needing the paycheque. Of course,I've got a smaller version of a rocketship in my backyard ready at the push of a button when I finally decide I've had enough of this shiat show we call the lowermainland and I need a quick escape.

Tough on me, cause the money I need for later is where I am right now,near people. And when my requirement of that money is met, I don't really wanna see too many more human beings the rest of my life. At least until I get dementia or something along those lines.
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 6
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Relocating and starting over
Posted: 6/30/2012 6:02:53 PM
May I suggest that you consider buying or renting a place with the option to buy, in the area that you may want to retire to, and spend time there while you keep your current job and location.....

With the housing market the way it is, and with mortgage rates soooooo low, one could purchase a place in the area you want to give a try, for your life when retired. You could then take vacations there, get to know the area and those living there, and if you need to, you could rent the place while not there. The option abound if you are willing to be creative, and possibly a land lord.....

Joined: 5/15/2011
Msg: 7
Relocating and starting over
Posted: 6/30/2012 6:13:32 PM
Great idea, C Deacon. I was watching an real estate show this week and saw nice downtown condos in Atlanta going for less than 50K. They were small but had nice amenities like granite countertops, clubhouse access and and city views . I already rent out a furnished roommate suite in my current house and it pays half the mortgage, so landlording is a possibility, though I have never done it at a distance before.

And cracked me up, but I love the forums, too.
Joined: 6/20/2012
Msg: 8
Relocating and starting over
Posted: 6/30/2012 6:30:58 PM
With 15 years left in your career I'd just focus on staying where you can maximize your income potential. You'll have time and resources to move when the age of retirement comes to you.

You also haven't mentioned any children or grandchildren and their locations, and I can tell you that will be a huge factor if you want to continue spending time with them.
 U make it entertaining
Joined: 7/17/2009
Msg: 9
Relocating and starting over
Posted: 6/30/2012 8:14:17 PM
I am blessed with a job that I can take anywhere I go.

I am a Canadian, and right now spending time down in Illinois with my son and his family.
They have asked on numerous occasions if I would come live with them.
And it's doable, but I would so miss Canada.
And I still have 2 children up there, who one day will bless me with more grandchildren.

Instead, I'm going to bounce between the 2 countries.

Presently I am not dating anyone.
And I don't believe that I really want to marry again, or spend 100% of my time with them.
Instead I would find it wonderful if I could find a man who feels the same way.
We could form a relationship whereby, when I'm around we are a couple, and when we are apart we live our lives.

As for you relocating ... why not?
We only live ONCE.
So do what makes YOU happy.
Joined: 5/15/2011
Msg: 10
Relocating and starting over
Posted: 6/30/2012 10:10:06 PM
JanetAlways "With 15 years left in your career I'd just focus on staying where you can maximize your income potential. You'll have time and resources to move when the age of retirement comes to you."

My parents are deceased and my sons are not married. One is in the Navy, the other is an artist also looking at relocating, so no family ties to keep me here. And I live in Iowa...wages are comparatively low but taxes and housing are incredibly high. Kiplinger rated it as one of the 10 worst places to retire. I think I may have better success by moving, but need a little advice from those who have found the courage to make that leap.
Joined: 5/31/2012
Msg: 11
Relocating and starting over
Posted: 6/30/2012 10:27:17 PM
I am not sure I would relocate to an unknown area, starting all over, having to make new friends...I would go back to my native place if I had to, would feel more at easy. Would retire somewhere new if I had a partner and we both decide to make the move.
Dating would not change for me, no matter where I am, any relationship I dive into is new.
I believe I am not going anywhere, like New York too much, would not find what I have anywhere else.
Joined: 6/11/2012
Msg: 12
Relocating and starting over
Posted: 7/1/2012 4:25:33 AM
I moved from a place where I knew few people well to a place
where I knew a few people. In the old place, the people I'd
known used their mobility to seek better lives, one by one,
until very few remained. The new place was far enough away
from the old place to make return visits an infrequent thing,
but still within reach once in a while. The remaining friends
in the old place put in remarkably little effort to stay in
touch, which was a bit of a surprise to me, as that became

It would be difficult to leave here, though I deny I've put down
new roots. If I did, my thoughts turn towards places not very
far away at all, perhaps in a 60 mile radius from here. Any
further away would feel like going over the horizon and
detaching from just about everyone I know now, or knew not
so long ago.

It would be a significant experiment, to test that. ;)

As terrain is critical to my lifestyle (bicycling figures prominently
in that) I keep iterating how I could do that, closer and closer
to where I live now; ideally within 15-30 miles from here, as I
have no other real complaints in life other than those wonderful,
arrogant, challenging, limiting HILLS around here!

They are pretty. They really are.
Joined: 3/30/2012
Msg: 13
Relocating and starting over
Posted: 7/1/2012 4:48:06 AM
I think it's a GREAT idea, OP !!!! I commend the 2nd poster JAX, for doing so. I would like to follow his example, but for now I need to live relatively close to my elderly parents.
Joined: 2/13/2012
Msg: 14
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Relocating and starting over
Posted: 7/1/2012 7:45:12 AM
It's interesting how Americans, in general, see relocating in terms of American options. Ask a Brit this and he might say Australia or Spain,, a Canadian Costa Rica or the UK, etc. There's 5 of us siblings and we live in 5 different countries. ...only one still in France (but he's lived and worked in other countries).
Joined: 6/13/2012
Msg: 15
Relocating and starting over
Posted: 7/1/2012 8:01:54 AM
Eventually, I will move abroad - again - but to teach. I'm still fairly young and raising a child. When he leaves the nest and he is settled, I will spread my wings and leave mine, lest grandchildren come. :)
Joined: 2/7/2012
Msg: 16
Relocating and starting over
Posted: 7/1/2012 8:45:04 AM
After spending much of my adult life living and working in Florida I decided it was time to return to Canada. My family including my children are all here in Alberta.

I chose to move to Calgary, a city I'd never lived in before. The only person I knew here was my sister. I joined Meetup and POF and have met many new people .

I'm really happy with my move, except for winter. I'm hoping that eventually I'll be able to disappear south for 3 months of the year.
Joined: 10/26/2011
Msg: 17
Relocating and starting over
Posted: 7/1/2012 9:25:41 AM
I moved from So.Cal. almost 8 years ago to the day,to a more shall we say,retiree friendly area of southern Utah.
BEST move I've ever made,with no regrets whatsoever....I miss the ocean,but that's about it.
And yes,I came here a few times first at different times of the year, to see if it was what I really wanted.
I say test the waters if you're not totally happy at your present local!
Joined: 5/24/2011
Msg: 18
Relocating and starting over
Posted: 7/1/2012 9:48:06 AM
I did it two years ago. Luckily my career is suited to opening your own shop and I could market to dual-state baby-boomers who had also bought a house here or bought a second house to transition to as they moved toward retirement. Cost of living is SO MUCH lower here, real estate prices and taxes a fraction of what they were in the Midwest. There are some significant cultural and attitude differences to adjust to, but so many transplants its not that great a shock to the system.
Joined: 5/15/2011
Msg: 19
Relocating and starting over
Posted: 7/1/2012 12:39:33 PM
Great tips, everyone! Thank you and keep them coming, especially if you are now living somewhere that you really like and plan to retire there.

And Sciencetreker, you are right. I would love to live abroad, but it is not as easy for Americans to do so. (Plus my college Spanish and high school French would not get me far). Mexico is an option I find intriguing, as is Costa Rica, but since employment is part of the equation, a move inside the US or its territories would be easier. States I am researching are Mississippi, Alabama, Georgia, Texas, Washington, and South Carolina. If anyone here lives there and would like to offer some insider knowledge, that would be appreciated.
Joined: 2/27/2009
Msg: 20
Relocating and starting over
Posted: 7/1/2012 3:12:30 PM
i am looking forward to moving too! and making new friends. hoping my job can relocate me, but if not, i'm going anyway! i've had a lot of changes in my life ~ a lot were difficult and i roll with the punches and come up standing. so i am not afraid of getting outside my comfort zone and making it happen.
i bet you will too!
i think it's a smart thing you're doing - like someone said, you could rent until you find something suitable. looks like you've looked into the area. often when you move, you will be sent welcome packages from area businesses with all sorts of interesting deals, schedules of events, etc.
as far as dating goes, that's always new, no matter where you live.
good luck!
Joined: 2/25/2009
Msg: 21
Relocating and starting over
Posted: 7/1/2012 4:06:54 PM
I moved to the west coast of Canada 15 years ago to be where I want to be when I retire, some 10 years from now. Today, I have friends here, the area is very familiar to me, it is home.

Doc Sage
 Irish Eyez
Joined: 12/30/2008
Msg: 22
Relocating and starting over
Posted: 7/1/2012 5:22:38 PM
I moved from Ireland to Canada. I arrived in early March to high winds and great big snow drifts. My immediate thought was, "What the hell am I getting in to?"

Albeit I have been here many years, I can honestly say I will move back home one day. It's not a monetary nor material thing, it's something that's truly in my very soul. ( Ireland )
Joined: 4/11/2009
Msg: 23
Relocating and starting over
Posted: 7/1/2012 7:16:47 PM

Has anyone else had some experience with this and how did you go about it?

I've been thinking about it for some time now, but a lot more seriously recently. I have had several places in mind and spent the last 6 weeks in 11 states spending some time getting to know some of these places. Sometimes I wish I was one of those kind of people who could just flip a coin and make a decision, but I'm one of the kinds who has to do the research.

I did stay a week in Jacksonville JAX. It was a sleeper city on the list. Better than I expected, but it didn't make the final 4.

And if you were dating, how did that impact you?

I would say it's a big impact. Which sort of puts a kink (not that kind of kink) in the dating process. My match would be someone who shared at least similar visions. Let's just say if her vision was to retire in the Artic and I was looking at the beach we'd have a problem.
Joined: 5/15/2011
Msg: 24
Relocating and starting over
Posted: 7/1/2012 9:31:39 PM
I hear you on the difference in vision, RMD...I was engaged briefly to a man who claimed to be open to relocating to a warmer climate but when I said, "I have enough saved to move us and can support us until we find jobs." he came up with all kinds of excuses as to why he could not possibly leave the Midwest. He now lives in the opposite direction of where I want to end up.

I am curious though, which cities made your final 4 and what attracted you to them?
Joined: 1/21/2006
Msg: 25
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Relocating and starting over
Posted: 7/1/2012 10:04:03 PM
i moved to ca from nj/nyc area and am still in culture shock fifteen years later. i was married at the time and upon divorce moved a bit south from the silicon valley to a a vacation community/university town. people retire here as well, but most have more money or are coupled!

i so miss my friends back home and the overall culture. i am also restricted from doing all the mountain climbing and sports that many of my new friends participate in. back home it was jazz clubs and more political/ social activity with more mental than physical things going on. it was also much colder! however, my kids are here, manfriend here and the climate is better for lymes disease.

how i finally integrated here into a social life, aside from all the dating drama, was first via a boyfriend where i got to know different venues and things to do. then when single joined meetup dot com.

however, as said above, depending upon the flexibility of your work, you will not have the working relationships you put together all these years.

for some, they are creative and manage well. others go back home. but again, this is an expensive area to live and were it not for my people connections with boyfriend and family, being "retired" and on pvt. disablity, i would consider moving, but first vacation there and again, look through all the meetups that are taking place where you are considering.
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