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Show ALL Forums  > Off Topic  > Pictures of your Ex      Home login  
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 changingtides
Joined: 1/3/2012
Msg: 1
Pictures of your ExPage 1 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
Im just throwing this out there, but my old boyfriend had kept pictures of his Exwife. I felt odd having them in our apartment when we lived together. They weren't wedding pictures- thank goodness. But do you, yourselves keep old pictures of your ex wives or ex husbands? Or do you throw the pictures away and move on with your life?
 forums1
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 2
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 12:58:20 AM
Are said pictures "on display" around his apartment?

I mean, I have some pictures of the ex's around... either sitting in a box on the shelf in my closet (that I haven't opened in years, pre-digital), or a couple in a folder full of pictures out on my disk (post-digital), that again is probably a handful out of say 1000 photos - along with pictures of friends, old coworkers, etc - again, that I probably haven't looked at in years for most of them. If someone found those a "threat" for some reason, I'd kinda wonder how insecure they were.

Having them hanging around the house framed and on display, well, that could be a different story - would sound like some 'attachment' to them still.
 forums1
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 3
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 1:18:01 AM

Finally, one day (while getting ready to move)


Heh, haven't moved in 20 years, so yeah - you 'collect' stuff that might 'go' when you're looking to lighten the load when you move. Honestly, the "pre-digital" pics I have in a box, I haven't opened that box in probably 10+ years - if I recall I have pictures taken with an old 110 flash camera from a school field trip to DC when I was like 12 (?), plus some from a family vacation to Mexico when I was 14.... nothing more than a little 'nostalgia' and a few laughs I'm sure if I dug them out. Out of sight, out of mind.
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 4
view profile
History
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 4:08:52 AM
I am by my nature, an Historian (among other things), so I keep all sorts of things, including pictures of my ex wife. I have no ex husbands.

I think that you are showing a little unthinking prejudice by framing the question to include the only alternative as "Or do you throw the pictures away and move on with your life?" I would gently suggest you give some more consideration to the concerns and sense of place in existence of whomever you deal with who also wants to keep illustrations of THEIR LIFE, even after the chapter about it is closed.
 Della D
Joined: 7/10/2008
Msg: 5
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 4:18:50 AM
I do not have pictures of my exes on display around my place and neither on my phone or laptop, but I do not throw them out. They are kept in boxes with all the other pictures.
 Blah_User_Name
Joined: 8/27/2011
Msg: 6
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 4:53:09 AM
I have a few pictures of my ex in which he is with the children. They are in photos albums along with other photos of my children as they have grown. If at some stage in the future, the children want them, then at least they are there.

I wouldn't expect anyone to throw things from their past away for my own comfort level but there needs to be a balance. Keeping photos on display would be dependent on circumstances, I think, and quantities. If for example, their partner died especially if there are children, I don't have an issue with a couple of photos being on display but a shrine to someone's memory, would be excessive.

Generally speaking, photos of an ex where the relationship simply came to an end for whatever reason, and where no children are involved, I don't see the need for photos to be displayed but likewise, I don't see the need to expect someone to dispose of them either. Tucked away with other memories for the past, is perfectly reasonable.
 Luckyq3
Joined: 6/16/2012
Msg: 7
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 4:54:12 AM
I have pic's on file mainly just memories plus shed is the mother of my son. I have pic's of her on my sons wall, to show my son it's okay to have a pic of your mom on the wall. I want to show him just cause his mom & I don't get a long it;s ok for him to be in " contact" with both of us.
 onewayoranuther
Joined: 3/21/2011
Msg: 8
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 5:35:35 AM
Throwing them away....no. I wouldn't expect him to throw them away either. They are memories of times gone by.

Having said that, they shouldn't be displayed. They should be kept in a memory box or album to be looked at later in life, remembering the life that you led and the people who crossed your path.
 femaleconnection
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 9
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 5:38:34 AM
I have an album with myself and my ex husband in pics together. Im keeping them for my son for when he has his own place. They are put away, not on display and I cannot even the recall the last time I went through them, but I do know it was with my son and he expressed the desire to keep them. So I will until he has his own place, then he can have them.

I dont keep pics of exes I 'just dated'. I dont see the point.
 nubeginnings64
Joined: 4/8/2012
Msg: 10
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 7:00:56 AM
I gave the old pictures to the kids. Others with the kids & for display purposes in my home, I had altered to exclude the ex. Cost is relatively cheap nowadays & the last thing a guy should want is to piss off his significant other.
 Anywherbuthere
Joined: 12/30/2011
Msg: 11
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 7:06:32 AM
If I run across one it's thrown out.
 freespiritxoxx
Joined: 7/9/2011
Msg: 12
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 7:09:24 AM
Yes I have kept photo's of ex's, but I don't have them displayed.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 13
view profile
History
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 7:10:00 AM
A picture is just a picture... a remembrance of past events..If someone is bothered by a picture then they have serious emotional issues.
 tampasmiles
Joined: 11/12/2010
Msg: 14
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 8:33:08 AM
KAKI...I agree....since I have taken 1000s and 1000s of pictures and value them for memories...or the artistic value...

I'm sure you might even think I'm nuts...but not only wouldn't I mind if they have them...but I use to store the photos for my most recent ex husband (had two) and I still have over 1000 pictures of his family on my computers...his exs and all. I don't get jealous and see them as part of the universe and if they weren't there...we all would be missing a piece of us, whether that's good or bad.

Several of my ex family members have me as a friend on facebook, so I can even see current pictures if I wanted to see what they are currently up to as well. No one around me seems to mind...and I wouldn't mind seeing their past either.
 Debyduz_
Joined: 5/4/2012
Msg: 15
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 9:12:45 AM
I got rid of all the stuff from the first husband. He died a year later. I should have just packed them away. I regret doing that.

I did not get rid of stuff from the 2nd husband because we have children together. I did however sell most the jewelry and used the money to go to my oldest son's wedding. Sadly the jewelry was just covering up his lies.
 want to travel
Joined: 7/29/2006
Msg: 16
view profile
History
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 9:42:34 AM
I have some pictures of my x somewhere
I am not going to throw them out
but they are no in any ones face.....
 Daisyrose73
Joined: 9/23/2010
Msg: 17
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 1:00:43 PM
I still have pictures of my ex husband as we have kids together. They are put away and they get them out sometimes. I have some pics of my youngest sons father that I have on a cd...somewhere, just in case he is curious of what his sperm donor looks like. I think I have a few floating around of an ex boyfriend but if my kids aren't in them I delete them as I come across them.
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 18
view profile
History
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 1:03:17 PM
I don't think throwing away pictures is ever a good idea unless someone was abusive and burning their pictures is therapeutic. I don't care for it when men display them around the house LOL that would smack of not being over that person, but to throw them out like trash, that would make me ask questions about the person doing it. It's part of your life, it's not any threat to me, I'm not going to be throwing away pictures to boost someone's sagging ego.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 19
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 2:36:39 PM
A question for the people who keep pictures of their ex: Does your ex keep pictures of you? If not and you do, why not?

I got rid of all pictures of my ex and I'm sure my ex doesn't have any pictures of me, which is fine by me. In fact, when she left me, she also gave back all gifts I and the rest of my family gave her over the years. She wanted to completely sever all ties with me and also my family, who always treated her like gold and gave her numerous very expensive gifts.

I don't get the hanging on ex's pictures. Why? Most people said they keep the pictures in a box tucked away somewhere. Why? Do you plan at looking at them later and wondering what if? I don't see a point to that. You can't change the past, no matter how hard you try to. You only have control of the now and future. I prefer to keep the past in the past. As for keeping them for your kids to see, I don't see the point of that either. Depending on how old the kids are, they are going to be asking "If you two were happy together in the pictures from the past, why do you hate each other now? Why couldn't you maintain the happy times and have a good marriage instead of getting a divorce?" It will cause more confusion than anything else.
 TC2u
Joined: 6/22/2011
Msg: 20
view profile
History
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 2:57:21 PM
I put them away, with other memories. To keep them out in the open would be totally incosiderate, and just outright weird.
 jmf29
Joined: 7/2/2012
Msg: 21
view profile
History
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 4:15:08 PM
( TIPS HAT TO LORIKULA ) nice post xxx
 _shakti_
Joined: 7/5/2011
Msg: 22
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 4:24:46 PM
I have one of those pretend old west photos framed and displayed which has my ex, his brother, mother and my daughters in it. My ex and his mom are now deceased, and I'm not about to chuck the photo because it may make someone feel uncomfortable.
 JoseMadre
Joined: 1/9/2012
Msg: 23
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 4:47:20 PM
The only pictures of my late wife on display anywhere in the house are those in my daughter's bedroom, but I will never dispose of those that I do have in boxes or digital. But then she isn't an "ex" in the sense usually associated with the word.
 CptIronJack
Joined: 3/13/2009
Msg: 24
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 4:55:08 PM
I have pics lying around in boxs and such and have pics on my facebook, but thats my history, if someone is with me long enough to create new history I don't mind losing them, but someone lasting 60 days isn't creating new history and I'm not willing to give up my history for them yet
 sunninginfl
Joined: 6/13/2012
Msg: 25
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 5:15:34 PM
I keep all photos. These photos are a part of your life that your kids can look back at. I do not keep them out in the open, always in a box in the garage. However, I do let my boys keep their fathers pictures in their own private space, their rooms. I will actually print them out for them just so they know that when they are here their father isn't that far away.
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