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Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > how do you even start to date...not a clue!!!      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 382838382838
Joined: 7/15/2012
Msg: 2
how do you even start to date...not a clue!!!Page 1 of 1    
I see you live in the states. Since you are just interested in friendships with the opposite sex I would suggest joining a meetup group. Go to meetup.com and then enter your city and state. In my area there is a movie night group and a fine dinning group and many others. Join groups you are interested in and you can also start your own meetup with your interests if you can't find it there.
 ChancesRMD
Joined: 4/11/2009
Msg: 3
how do you even start to date...not a clue!!!
Posted: 7/20/2012 9:48:39 AM
When talking to someone I try to get an idea of what they like to do for fun. Like if they might like to do something like go to a fair, a show, a ballgame, a wine festival etc. If there is no mutual interest than that's the end of that.

If we do share an interest than the next time I want a date I think of that person. I give them a call or drop them a note to see if they are still available and want to go. I only scan the profiles for a few short facts and don't put much stock in a picture. I'm a big believer in it isn't real until you meet someone so they can put up any picture they want or say anything they want in their picture, but I'm not going to get excited about someone until I meet them in person.

I don't do all of the dinners and coffee dates anymore. I had a hard time with trying to court someone over the internet that I'd never met before.

That's how I start. From that point it's another thread : )

Good luck to you.

Btw- I hosted a POF party in your great state last May. I'm not sure how far you are from CharlesTown. You might want to try one of those some time too.
 nativerock
Joined: 10/16/2010
Msg: 4
how do you even start to date...not a clue!!!
Posted: 7/20/2012 10:34:05 AM
Yes check into the meetups and pursue interests you like.. You probably will never meet the man of your dreams there but you will enjoy getting out and about with like minded people..

Have fun
nativerock
 originalNw
Joined: 11/7/2006
Msg: 5
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how do you even start to date...not a clue!!!
Posted: 7/20/2012 2:04:53 PM
Apply the same skills your daughter used to find your new heart throb! The same way you found your ex's ! There is no exact pattern..method to find someone new. Check at the normal places..church..work..food stores..sporting stores. Use the same skills you used to find any boytoy !
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 6
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how do you even start to date...not a clue!!!
Posted: 7/20/2012 2:34:40 PM
First things first OP.......You are a two time loser with marriage by the age of 42, and you should not want to be a three time loser, so throw that part of the equation and dating out, and take it from there.

Think self, and self image, being happy with who and what you have and what you can offer if the right person is there. Do not look for someone to complete you, take care of you, manage you, or be your daddy, and look for those men that are happy to just know an equal, enjoy them and develop a relationship.

Look to do things that please you.....clubs, hobbies, many volunteer groups, etc., and join for the pleasure of it all, to take time away from the mundane, and create a sense of purpose in your life. Once there, without even realizing it, others will gravitate to you and you them, and bingo.......the dating/relationship dance begins.

And by the way.....there is nothing stopping you from picking up that phone and inviting a male friend to the movies, shopping, and dinner. You will be surprised with how many men seek company too!!

cd
 MayorMcDubstep
Joined: 7/17/2012
Msg: 7
how do you even start to date...not a clue!!!
Posted: 7/21/2012 12:35:09 AM
I met a lot of nice people in my Meetup.com Screenwriter group. Who needs to date when you meet lots of interesting people from
the MU groups?
 northwoods57
Joined: 7/17/2007
Msg: 8
how do you even start to date...not a clue!!!
Posted: 7/22/2012 4:18:36 PM
totally lost, or just lost! make yourself available, dress nice. Go grocery shopping. Go to a festival or some place with a lot of people.
 sillygoosess
Joined: 4/18/2012
Msg: 9
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how do you even start to date...not a clue!!!
Posted: 8/5/2012 6:23:31 PM
AND smile alot!
 AlfredoDP
Joined: 5/31/2012
Msg: 10
how do you even start to date...not a clue!!!
Posted: 8/5/2012 6:40:21 PM
OP, just enjoy the single life.
 Thornz2000
Joined: 1/2/2012
Msg: 11
how do you even start to date...not a clue!!!
Posted: 8/7/2012 12:36:05 PM
I would say you need to ask yourself 'What do I like to do where there is people to join in. Or a nice social setting'?
Then do that and make some friends and who knows over time you might start picking up a vib from someone.
 raicor
Joined: 4/22/2012
Msg: 12
how do you even start to date...not a clue!!!
Posted: 8/7/2012 8:09:48 PM
and now, for something completely "different"...

http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200301/dating-after-divorce.

the sun will shine another day. it's yours alone to want to play. :)
 juicyfruit21
Joined: 10/30/2011
Msg: 13
how do you even start to date...not a clue!!!
Posted: 8/7/2012 8:17:05 PM
How did you date before you were married 2 times? It's really no different...you meet online, email, exchange pleasantries, and then arrange to meet for coffee or something that does not last 3 hours. You either have a connection and would like to see each other again or not.

I think you are taking the right road with nothing serious at this time.
And I 'm sure I don't have to tell you to meet the guy in a public place. Good luck. :)
 shy2anne
Joined: 2/27/2009
Msg: 14
how do you even start to date...not a clue!!!
Posted: 8/7/2012 8:50:25 PM
i'm in a similar boat. only older. of course, since i married young to my first boyfriend, i never experienced dating. wondering what a "meet up group" is.
i will try to keep track of this thread for answers.
hope you find answers too :)
Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > how do you even start to date...not a clue!!!