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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > From a guy's perspective..define "Looking to date but nothing serious      Home login  
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 misssassyblond
Joined: 3/31/2012
Msg: 1
From a guy's perspective..define "Looking to date but nothing serious" status.Page 1 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
I see a lot of this status and being the curious person that I am, I would like to hear from a guy's perspective, what exactly is this definition? Does it mean they just are looking for someone to go out with, hook up with every now and then? A friends with benefits situation?

I'm not into playing games, a friends with benefits situation or anything of the sort.
 Wedne003
Joined: 4/11/2011
Msg: 2
From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 4:02:10 PM
It depends but most cases it means FWB.
Guys want to play the field and keep there options open....saying that I have met a lot of woman that think the same way. Its getting harder to find the good ones.

Ciao
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 3
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From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 4:02:47 PM
All of the above......and to enjoy as meant to be....friends, lovers, and whatever happens........but nothing planned!!

cd
 lisboeta
Joined: 10/18/2008
Msg: 4
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From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 4:14:00 PM
Sorry not a guy but I have also asked this question before and learned that many people will have their own different views on the subject but is not a gender issue but a way of feeling. To me looking to date but nothing serious means nothing heavy. How would you know you would want something serious if you havent found it yet? If you were to choose put down "looking for a relationship" may sound too desperate and heavy and it may be that they are still dealing with other issues and are not ready to commit or they may want to just find some company or just want to have some fun. Eitherway who knows until you find out for yourself what they written is even true.
 Dolphina
Joined: 6/10/2012
Msg: 5
From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 4:14:30 PM
I'm not a guy, but I'll respond anyway. I find myself in a dilemma. I am not looking for a long term, live-in relationship, and I am looking to date, so the phrase "Looking to date, but nothing serious" literally fits me well. This does not mean, looking for a fwbs, and yet this is what guys think I mean and I get a lot of suggestive emails. I change what I write in my profile fairly often, but my dilemma remains. The pof choices for the kind of relationship I want are really inadequate and I think some definitions should be spelled out.
 Choporis
Joined: 6/25/2012
Msg: 6
From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 4:38:17 PM
To OP,

In my perspective, it usually means they have a relationship already and looking for another one on the side. Or they are looking to casually date someone without the goal of getting into any commitment.
In other word, friends with benefit. :)
 ro1970
Joined: 10/23/2011
Msg: 7
From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 4:41:44 PM
it's guyspeak for............."I want to have my cake and eat it too"..........

In other words, a person looking to date but nothing serious screams "I wanna get laid but not have any strings".

or to put it bluntly.....they are looking for friends with benefits.
 the_biggavell
Joined: 7/9/2012
Msg: 8
From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 4:48:53 PM
Msg #2 spelled it out correctly. Its keeping options open, and thats how guys in general operate anyways. I dont want to talk to you woman and find out your nuts.. And have to put up with a relationship with you, or the emotionally draining process of rejecting you. I want to feel you out and get a sense of who and what you are. In essence.. In order for me to have a relationship with you.. You gotta grow on me.. I gotta like you, and i like you better when im sleeping with you, hanging with you chatting with.. Without the pressure and title of relationship. Some women just dont know how to do that, and it scares men off. They dont know how to enjoy moments and shared time, always worrying about whats next.. And judgments like whore and slut, that are meaningless unless you identify yourself with it. Some women..

Some women just dont know how to be LIKED.
But they want love, and chase it, and set rules, that protect what you think is valuable.. And really isnt more valuable to use.
 15111958
Joined: 12/6/2011
Msg: 9
From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 4:50:59 PM
Women say the same thing too and I always took it to me they want someone to be in a relationship with but not to get married to.


You are a beautiful woman OP. 38? really? you don't look it.
 rdeffley
Joined: 9/21/2009
Msg: 10
From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 4:55:08 PM
I think one mistake some women make is that when they see it they think that he is afraid of commitment. However, there are guys who are looking for the right woman but like to take their time and get to know her before getting serious. This doesn't mean he is out dating multiple women. It just means that he doesn't want to rush anything. Now I have up that I am looking for a commitment because that is my long term goal with the right woman. However, that doesn't mean I want to be exclusive after three dates either. In a way, I think putting up dating and nothing serious is a way to safeguard against needy women who get attached too easily and who are overly romantic.
 _mr_brown
Joined: 5/2/2011
Msg: 11
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From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 4:56:24 PM
Yeah, it pretty much means they are looking for a FWB.

Heck, even the guys with a "Looking for a relationship" status are looking for FWB's.

At least the guys with a "Looking to date but nothing serious" are being honest about it.
 OyVay...
Joined: 7/15/2011
Msg: 12
From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 5:01:47 PM
Oh he11 OP, we did like 28 pages on this...just a few months ago...

Guess what, there was no concensus!

Based on everything that was said on that thread, what has been said on other threads, what the instructions on the site tell you, and what will be written here...it all doesn't mean bupkis...since each of us as individuals will derive our own meaning to all the phrases and catch alls, they have for "what your looking for"!

That doesn't even count the liars, who say they want an LTR, but are only looking for sex.

So welcome to the ranks of the confused. I suppose for the basis of discussion, we can eliminate "intimate encounter" but that is where the only clear choice ends. There will be a boatload of women who will use the trite phrases "get the milk, not buy the cow" or "get their cake and eat it too" or the other garbage want to pose, they KNOW what is in a man's head, even though they never spoke with him!

How do you wind up in a relationship?

Well you do it by dating! You can say you want a relationship, but you DON'T start out in one. You start by meeting people you are attracted to, then dating them, then lay out clearly who you are, what you want and where your boundries are. Some of both gender won't get serious until sex happens..I've dated women from here, who post the first date, ask if we are exclusive now...

Stop trying to finish the journey before you even take the first step on the trip...

But then again, now you will hear from all the "experts" who can read all of our minds, and know what we meant, when we filled those stupid parameters out when we joined.

good luck
 15111958
Joined: 12/6/2011
Msg: 13
From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 5:01:56 PM

Heck, even the guys with a "Looking for a relationship" status are looking for FWB's.


Who made you spokesperson for all the men on here. I'm certainly not looking for a FWB
 Paderic
Joined: 2/23/2010
Msg: 14
From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 5:15:09 PM
It doesn't have a universal meaning. If there's a guy you're otherwise attracted to, ask him what he means by it.
 HiHeelsLover
Joined: 7/13/2012
Msg: 15
From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 5:17:38 PM
I want to add to that. IF I am dating a guy casually with sex involved do I have to just date HIM? Or can I causally date a couple of guys?
 rdeffley
Joined: 9/21/2009
Msg: 16
From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 5:21:15 PM
Dating and having sex are two different things. Let's say you are having great sex with a guy but you are not sure if he is boyfriend material. Since you are not exclusive, go out and date other guys to see if you can find a better connection. However, I would recommend that you only have sex with one guy at a time. Having multiple sexual partners is never a good idea from not only a safety standpoint, but also an emotional one. So if you are casual, feel free to date other guys. But I would just stick with having sex with one person and then stop seeing them if you want to have sex with someone else.
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 17
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From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 5:23:25 PM
How can you be looking for anything serious before you meet and get to know someone and then decide you'd like something more with them? Being on the prowl for a mate is pretty self-defeating. I don't take people seriously when they start out with the cart before the horse, since they are usually looking for someone to stick into a role they've already made up in a fantasy they have, instead of meeting people to see if they would like to get to know them better.
 TerrieLynnC
Joined: 5/31/2011
Msg: 18
From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 5:24:44 PM

there are guys who are looking for the right woman but like to take their time and get to know her before getting serious.


bwaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

REALLY?!?!!?!? WHERE?????????????????????????????

OT
most everyone here has the right idea
"looking to date but nothing serious" means "I want to get laid NO STRINGS" or "friends with benefits"
 the_biggavell
Joined: 7/9/2012
Msg: 19
From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 5:32:58 PM
Sh--- date them if you want. **** them even
just keep it real with the guy, and let him know. And of course be careful about disease etc.... But tell the truth... If your looking for more, it means two things.. The dude doesnt satisfy you. or your an angry woman, copying what men naturally do... Because you really only want to have one man to **** alot!! Guys wnt many women to **** once.. And eventually limit it to one or three close women
 rdeffley
Joined: 9/21/2009
Msg: 20
From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 5:36:57 PM
bwaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

REALLY?!?!!?!? WHERE?????????????????????????????


Right here.. I don't date multiple women. But I don't jump into a relationship with one right away either. You have to gauge how compatible your lifestyles are with sleep schedules, (night owl vs early riser) and work schedules, interests, emotional compatibility, similar goals, and the physical. This is not something you can find out in a handful of dates. I like to date a woman casually for at least a few months spending a few times a week together with semi-regular communication. This allows me to be able to get to know her, and leave room for departure if she is not the right one. I also don't have sex with a woman until I am exclusive with her. However, I do believe in plenty of foreplay minus the penetration, written foreplay, spontaneous PDA, discussing sexual compatibility, etc.. In fact, I think if more people talked about sex early on, it would save a lot of time.
 OyVay...
Joined: 7/15/2011
Msg: 21
From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 5:42:24 PM
"I'm not into playing games"

Hahahahahahaha!!! I luved this comment, after rereading it, I checked your profile.

So what do I find, you have an age range of 23 to 38! Now the funny part to me, is when a guy wants to date down 15 years...the women go "ewwwww"...but when a woman puts this up "oh that's fine"..go the ladies!

So according to my thought process, and apparently yours, you seek a committed, long term relationship with a guy 23-24-25! So many threads on here, say guys at that age are just looking to get laid. Now I ain't judgin, just noting that many younger guys, are all about dating many women, and would have that "date but nothing serious" on their profile.

So OP, I am somewhat confused, by your statement.
 HiHeelsLover
Joined: 7/13/2012
Msg: 22
From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 5:59:54 PM
I put nothing serious and I will date men and yes sleep with them until I meet a guy who is worthy of the effort of a relationship. Maybe that is what he is saying?
 Halcyon_Skies
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 23
From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 6:12:21 PM
In my experience, most of the men who had that in their profiles were looking primarily for a sexual relationship with no strings attached.

I reserved sex for serious relationships only---so if a guy had in his profile that he wasn't looking for anything serious, and he asked me out, he'd get a dinner companion for the evening, and nothing more.
 Paddy_o_Lantern
Joined: 5/24/2012
Msg: 24
From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 6:49:45 PM
So what do I find, you have an age range of 23 to 38! ...

So according to my thought process, and apparently yours, you seek a committed, long term relationship with a guy 23-24-25! So many threads on here, say guys at that age are just looking to get laid... just noting that many younger guys, are all about dating many women, and would have that "date but nothing serious" on their profile.


OP just skip the ones who put want to date but nothing serious on thier profiles if that does not fit what you are looking for or does not appeal to you - you may find that eliminating guys based on they would rule out too many of the young men that you find attractive?

Lots of young guys with plenty of options are going to want to explore those options. It's up to you to decide with game you want to play.
 Wedne003
Joined: 4/11/2011
Msg: 25
From a guy's perspective..define Looking to date but nothing serious status.
Posted: 7/22/2012 6:51:39 PM
So if you were really not intereseted in what the guy is looking for you will still go on a date with him and pretty well waste his time !!!!!!
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