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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Blueline294
Joined: 3/28/2012
Msg: 1
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...Page 1 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
I can give you some perspective on this site from what I've learned (this was my first time also).
1. If you get a pic that shows more than one person, just pick out the one not attractive to you... that's the one messaging you.
2.Something about turning 50 makes peoples sense of perception warped.... the new average now means 40-50 lbs overweight 75 % of the time.
3. If they start off saying that their looking for a good hearted man (woman) chances are they live in the country.
4. Nothing like getting a picture of a cat (dog) when they say they liked your profile.
5. The mysterious types who won't post a pic, but want your phone number so they can send you one. (yeah right... let me send that to you).
6. The non responder.... messages you and you reply and they never respond back. wth?
7.The "meet me crew" the folk's that see your photo on meet me and click the button and never type a word. I figure if you can't say something why bother.
8. The elusive goddess (god) a really attractive person you message and they delete it without even opening it. (I was letting them know I hit the mega millions...but to late now!)
9. The nut case. She messaged one time and you reply thanks or something and then continues messaging demanding to know why you aren't responding more. (I call them the BLOCK BUNCH).
10. The bible thumper bunch.....if you don't attend church regularly and believe in the almighty 24/7. We won't work. (I'm thinking why aren't you on Christian Singles?).
 Suzie_Hippie_Homemaker
Joined: 8/10/2012
Msg: 2
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/21/2012 8:06:38 AM
1. If none of the pictures show their teeth, they either don't have any or have really bad ones.
2. If they are wearing a hat in every picture, they are definitely bald.
3. If there is no full body shot, they are quite overweight.
4. The Meet Me feature is only a fcuk able 2 second test. Profiles are rarely read at that time.
5. Hidden profiles usually mean they are married or in a relationship.
6. No public pic is the same as above...usually.
7. There are a zillion time wasters who only seek to have a texting/email/phone buddy and will never want to meet.
8. There are a large percentage of men who do not have a drivers licence or are currently court ordered to have a blow & go installed.
9. 6 foot means 5' 10" at best.
10. Lots of players. I read somewhere that 10% of the men are having sex with 90% of the women...and I believe it.

But if you can get past all that, it's all good!
 _TALL_IQ2_
Joined: 2/10/2010
Msg: 3
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/21/2012 8:25:36 AM


8. The elusive goddess (god) a really attractive person you message and they delete it without even opening it. (I was letting them know I hit the mega millions...but to late now!)

Hey there! I never did that read/delete to ya. How about a date next Saturday night? Pick me up in yer Learjet..



I learned that I had to misrepresent myself in order to get dates

Really? say it isn't so, Joe..

And tell us just how is that workin out for ya these days? Is anything real or everything still just misrepresented for a "date"?
 laskoboo
Joined: 2/12/2010
Msg: 4
view profile
History
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/21/2012 8:29:51 AM
Your 1-10 is mostly correct
but it does not stop at 10.
 motown_cowgirl
Joined: 12/22/2011
Msg: 5
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/21/2012 9:05:39 AM
1. I'm sorry that there are so many women here who are too ugly for you, and after only 90 days of being here. Damn them all to hell, and how dare they send email to an attractive man such as yourself while being guilty of having the ugilies??? Pfft, don't they know any better? They really should! The nerve of them.
2. At your age, whatever it is, having a warped perception seems to be a given at least based on whatever you're complaining about here.
3. Start searching for self-described evil b1tches who live in the city, problem solved.
4. You poor thing, you said "tits", not pets!!! I apologize for women everywhere for misunderstanding your typos.
5. You are too smart for us, also.
6. They are not interested, do a thread search.
7. They don't know what they're doing either, do another thread search.
8. Sorry, you weren't very attractive to them! See #1 on your list of complaints for insight.
9. What, there are crazy people out there? Say it ain't so!
10. Shut up. "Bible thumpers" have just as much of a right to be here as you do.


I wasn't slamming anybody's religion.

No, you were just slamming women for this and that and especially for failing to live up to your expectations within 90 days. Who do we we think we are, emailing good-looking men while going around not being beautiful enough and not giving you a sandwich and a blowjob? Jayzus, what is wrong with us. It's disgusting, isn't it. You throbbing little bundle of joy.
 Blueline294
Joined: 3/28/2012
Msg: 6
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/21/2012 9:24:24 AM
You certainly have a unique perspective. Wasn't complaining about anything cowgirl. "Tits"? Don't know how that came out of it. But have a great day anyway.
 Attercop
Joined: 6/25/2012
Msg: 7
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/21/2012 9:29:28 AM
^^^omg, wtf. You did not just say "shut up."
That is so..... rude.

OP,
I don't mind lame jokes SO much
but yours are borrowed, AND 30+ years old, AND lame, AND/or angry in tone.

When your ship comes in, you'll be at the airport? Really?
Nobody says that any more: "When my ship comes in..."

Buzzer.
Gong.
Check please.
"Next."


vvv You would know.

 U make it entertaining
Joined: 7/17/2009
Msg: 8
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/21/2012 9:51:01 AM

learned that I had to misrepresent myself in order to get dates and that most girls on here are either looking for a one-night stand or a magical connection with a perfect guy.


Why would you do that?

By misrepresenting yourself you will only be attracting other individuals who misrepresent themselves.

That is just plain STUPID!

As Dr. Seuss says ...

Today you are YOU, that is truer then true.
There is no one alive who is Youer then You.

So .... be you!
 Revilors
Joined: 10/9/2008
Msg: 9
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/21/2012 10:38:31 AM
1. Your perspective...a negative one at that. Is she really "unattractive" to you...or the least of the group...from your prospective?
2 Again this is a matter of perspective. What difference does it make when they provide a photo?
3 City girls are looking for azz hats then? Guess I'm a "country" guy...I'm not attracted to vicious beasts.
4 I'll give you that a profile exclusively of animals is odd. It's a good thing you have the ability to ask for a recent photo.
5 Mysterious...public figure...stalker ex husband...whatever the reason. Don't want to give out your number...set up a hotmail account just for such things.
6 Rarely had that issue. But...I've never responded back..."are you really average or are you fat"?
7 I asked Markus to remove the gun to my head so I wouldn't be forced to visit that page.
8 They may have checked your profile out first. Not being mean...but I visit profiles before responding. Maybe they weren't interested enough to respond.
9 Which is why many don't respond.
10 You feel everyone should take a break from faith? OK
 Crsdan57
Joined: 7/25/2012
Msg: 10
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/21/2012 11:10:26 AM
Op, I did the same thing in my profile. I called it "My observations" I had about 50 of them. It was not received well by those reading. I got called a few names and even saw the profile of a girl I dated in high school, I dropped a line to say hi and she dumped on me too for my insensitve comments.. I find it amazing how offended people get at general comments not directed at anybody specific. I tend to think that it may hit too close to home.

One thing different about what I did. When I did it I was in a relationship (still am) and knew it wouldnt hurt my chances of finding someobody. Btw, I think your comments are right on...

PS...Barbar Eden? No sht, I am jealous as hell.
 _TALL_IQ2_
Joined: 2/10/2010
Msg: 11
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/21/2012 11:27:03 AM
they are striking out left and right. The fact is most guys cannot 'be themselves' and get dates online. It just doesn't work.

Thank you for a bit of insight into your online experience.
It is educational for some newbies and naive types like I used to be, to see a few people actually admit their "undisclosed" multiple deceptions in their quest for all those failed "first meets" they seem to be seeking.
 Crsdan57
Joined: 7/25/2012
Msg: 12
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/21/2012 11:31:45 AM
Ok, enlighten me. Why would you want to meet someone that does not want to meet you? If you lied in your profile, she isnt there to meet you she is meeting the person you made up. So what do you think the possibility of that person staying more than 1 minute and if she does stay longer, what do you think the odds are that she will see you again?
 flaneur001
Joined: 7/31/2011
Msg: 13
view profile
History
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/21/2012 11:58:33 AM
What I've learned in 90 days:

1. that I'm more sensitive than I thought

2. that I'm more discerning (picky) than I thought

3. that I can handle awkward situations reasonably well

4. not to respond to every e-mail I get 'a non response is a response"

5. to communicate more directly and clearly with 'dates'

6. to clarify before going on a date that we are going 'dutch'

7. I've learned to distinguish between my projections of desire for a connection and the reality of whom I'm connecting with

8. I've learned from a date about female Russian poets

9. I learned that one of my dates used to live around the corner from me and designed an amazing iconic house

10. I've learned that you can meet and begin to develop a relationship with someone you've met on-line...even if he's 3,000 miles away!

#11 I've learned that the Forum is a great place to make friends, and learn how to navigate dating at mid-life
 U make it entertaining
Joined: 7/17/2009
Msg: 14
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/21/2012 12:10:23 PM

To get dates and it worked.


Great helpmeahhh ... so you got the dates.
I see you're here for long term, and I gather that hasn't happened yet.

Why?

Because you are NOT who you say you are.
You are a fraud and a phoney.

Why would a sane woman want one of those.

BTW ... good luck to you.
Keep on doing what you're doing and see how long you can keep a date interested with your bullshit.
 Blueline294
Joined: 3/28/2012
Msg: 15
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/21/2012 12:15:07 PM
Good post #20. I like that.

#15- Thanks, was just trying to be a little humorus but obviously some didn't see it that way. By the way also worked for PB for ten years, so I know the outside doesn't always match the inside.

#16- 6 years! Man that's being tenatious.
 Crsdan57
Joined: 7/25/2012
Msg: 16
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/21/2012 12:19:20 PM
I'm a lil' amazed that you're amazed. Nobody held a gun to your head and forced you to answer some unattractive woman's email much less go out on a date with them.
Why would you think I responded? I didnt. Why would you think I went on a date with them? I didnt. Language I hear? I wasnt looking to hear anything. I was attempting humor. btw I did receive as many comments telling me they thought my profile was funny as I did saying they were offended. Take a guess as to who found it funny and who found it offensive? I bet you guessed right. Apparently my general comments did have an impact on those feeling it necessary to respond. Which by the way are the ones I was talking about

I do have the freedom to shoot off my pissy attitude in any direction I wish. As long as I do not break any laws I can say whatever I wish. Likewise you have the freedom to not listen or not read.
 Revilors
Joined: 10/9/2008
Msg: 17
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/21/2012 1:37:37 PM

Take a guess as to who found it funny and who found it offensive? I bet you guessed right.


I'm guessing the ones you found desirable found it offensive and those that were not (desirable in your opinion) found you hilarious. Lest those 50 "pearls" be ever present in your profile. Your logic and wisdom would otherwise be in question.

It's amazing that the OP has been able to discern the flaws with the overwhelming majority in terms of THEIR motives and ways of thinking. It made perfectly justifiable sense to his own. "It's not me...it's everyone else that have driven my own lack of success".

I hear you...bro's...I see you...and I feel you.
 Crsdan57
Joined: 7/25/2012
Msg: 18
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/21/2012 3:33:38 PM
I'm guessing the ones you found desirable found it offensive and those that were not (desirable in your opinion) found you hilarious. Lest those 50 "pearls" be ever present in your profile. Your logic and wisdom would otherwise be in question.


You would be wrong. The ones that saw themselves in what I said found it offensive. The ones that were confident enough in themselves really didnt give a rats ass what I said and found it funny. What I found "desireable" wasnt part of the equation. Once again, I have never met anybody from this site and quite frankly I wouldnt. If I were looking (I am not) I wouldnt look here. Here is a "pearl"...Free online dating sites are to dating sites what soup kitchens are to restaurants.

I just read Aussies post(below)...you hit on about 10 of mine...I find her list funny. I am sure there are some who are offended and will probably tell her so.

 aussiesealady
Joined: 11/10/2011
Msg: 19
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/21/2012 3:54:26 PM
I started to write the list below then realised how it may come out.
I apologise in advance if any of the below offends anyone or everyone.

The realities of POF from my perspective after now about 10 months are that people are very strange creatures.
And the internet allows people to pretend to be what they want if they want.

There are some honest, wonderful people on here.

That being said.....

I have also learned that sometimes.

1. Talking on the phone with someone for 5 hours does not mean he will turn up to a meeting.
2. Having a fabulous first meeting and then him saying he wants to see me again and calling me daily for a few weeks does not mean he will turn up to a second meeting.
3. When he finds out that I have a house, a job and a little money in the bank that he wants to move in an be supported.
4. Expect the photo to be 10 years old and if it is more recent be very pleasantly suprised.
5. When he says he sails, plays golf, surfs etc it means he did it at least once possibly 30 years ago.
6. Sometimes he measures his height with a non standard measuring stick, or he drank a shinking potion prior to meeting.
7. Athletic / average build equates to much fatter than me a self confessed BBW.
8. My children come first means no time to spend with a lady.
9. Stated career may be one he had some time in the past and now he is in between jobs.
10. Fun means sex.
11. Hang out means sex.
12. Date but nothing serious means sex.
13. Cuddle means sex
14. Sex means pleasure for him not necessarily for you
15. Separated can mean still living with wife and/ or mistress
16. Divorced can mean officially divorced but still not having the baggage sorted. Still going through the property settlement, child access / custody battle and living with his parents, in a boarding house or upstairs in a pub.
17. Single can mean absolutely anything.
18. Being married and in a relationship means very different things to different people.
19. Being asked... You are not religious, do you mind if I am? Answer - Fine by me as long as you don't try to convert me. Then he spends the rest of the meeting bashing his bible at me. I particularly liked the part where he said that everyone who does not believe the same as him - (his particular denomination) will be subject to fire, damnation and and burn in hell.
20. Don't take it all too seriously. This is supposed to be fun.
 realk3000
Joined: 8/11/2012
Msg: 20
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/21/2012 3:58:18 PM
^^ LOL. I enjoyed that post.


6. Sometimes he measures his height with a non standard measuring stick, or he drank a shinking potion prior to meeting.


:D
 PeakChaser
Joined: 3/26/2012
Msg: 21
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/21/2012 4:13:30 PM
1. "I don't believe in dressing up fancy for the first date" means she'll make no effort, smell like she hasn't showered for 2 days, and chain smokes.

2. "Let's go somewhere nice" means ordering the 100$ meal and making you foot the bill. (FYI I did not. I ordered a 150$ steak and 60$ wine and paid for my half and asked her to do her own. The steak was GREAT!)

3. "New to the city" roughly means "I have no social life and expect you to introduce me to everyone and drive me everywhere".

4. "I won't have sex on the first date / second date / third date / however long" or variations of "not into a quick ****" means she just wants to use sex as a weapon and bargaining chip.

5. "Average Body" on a girl roughly means overweight.

6. "Athletic build" with no body shot means overweight.

7. Deceptive shots means overweight.

8. A long list of requirements roughly means "Super picky, unrealistic in ideals, completely unapproachable in real life, now taking it onto the net to make guys feel inscure about themselves".

9. "I'm not shallow" means "I will judge you entirely on your looks".

10. "I don't need a man in my life" means a woman who expects to dominate every man in her life, yet expects to score the best guys ever.

11. "Ask me anything!" means "Shallow, won't read your message".

12. "Just got out of a relationship" means "Not over my ex, using you as a distraction".
 Mathayus72
Joined: 3/9/2012
Msg: 22
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/22/2012 4:06:59 AM
I have learned that the forums are far more interesting than sending emails and trying to actually meet anyone here. This is because I have come to realize that I dont have the time to write a bazillion "heart felt" messages and not get a reply. Not good odds...I would rather hit on women walking around the grocery store and take my chances there.

However, there is great dating/relationship advice and commentary here. I am really enjoying it...and using what I'm learning and applying to my real life pursuit of romance.

M
 TantricJedi
Joined: 2/22/2012
Msg: 23
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/22/2012 8:39:28 AM
If someone is new online, they love the attention they initially get and won't ever be serious with you.

If someone has been online too long, they're jaded and don't take you seriously.

Men don't know who to wine and dine and women don't know who to trust and sleep with.
 TantricJedi
Joined: 2/22/2012
Msg: 24
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/22/2012 8:44:36 AM
Married women not living with their ex's with sincere reasons for still being married (i.e. kids, benefits, etc.)

Any man that brought that kind of crap to a date would be eviscerated. I'll say this though, at least the women were honest when we met.
 _TALL_IQ2_
Joined: 2/10/2010
Msg: 25
What you've learned about online dating after 90 days...
Posted: 8/22/2012 8:50:22 AM
right but I would not engage in someone
whose username is "open casket" that is ultra super creepy

Right, but it seems to have gotten your attention.. And most of the time that is all that matters on these online "dating" sites anyway.. You're not likely to forget that original and "creepy" username, now are you?

That's something I have learned about "dating" online or anywhere.
IF you don't differentiate yourself somehow, you soon get forgotten and lost in the ephemeral crowd of "potential suitors" that many attractive women have in their entourage or email inbox...
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