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Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 LGG62
Joined: 9/9/2007
Msg: 3
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???Page 1 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
It could possibly work. I have a few questions, though. How long have you been dating him? (I have a feeling it has not been very long, but you're going to say you know all you need to about him.) I have concerns because you are so young and still have a lot of things to experience that will continue to shape you and help you to grow as a human being. He does not have kids, and most likely will not want them. Is this also what you want? In addition, there is the fact that he is going to begin having health issues and just being older, are you prepared to take care of him and be his nursemaid when you are in your forties and beyond?

I don't have issues with the age difference, per se. I'm just not convinced that you have thought this through for the long haul and instead, are caught up in the romance of a new relationship.

Edit: I see from your profile that you want kids. Most men his age are not looking to have them. They have their lives set, they don't want to leave a young child behind when they die, etc. Definitely something that needs to be figured out before you plant your flag on this guy.

Also, you keep posting, and those posts tell me that you really haven't thought this whole thing through, that you are caught up in the romance and fairytale, and you seem to be needing to push for people to agree with you, not give you their honest opinions. They are coming across as defensive.
 Stray__Cat
Joined: 7/12/2006
Msg: 5
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 4:21:45 PM
hmmmm
At twenty five, I wonder if you can really know this.

Not that you aren't mature.
You sem very much so and smart.

Just this, you will be a completely different person
at 35.
and again at 45.

Whereas e will be the same......and much older.

You may want kids later on.
You may want and be something completely different later on.

...just hard to know at 25.
 U make it entertaining
Joined: 7/17/2009
Msg: 7
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 4:29:04 PM
My daughter dated a man 20 years older then herself.
Even moved in with him, and yes I objected.

It ended, and now she hangs her head in shame as it was a Daddy issue.

You think you are mature and so smart for being 25.
Come back when your 35 and let us know how it worked out.

I'm in your Dad's camp.
I feel so sorry for them.
 not_single_x
Joined: 8/27/2009
Msg: 10
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 4:39:45 PM
No, it can't possibly work but you're not going to stop moving forward just because a bunch of internet strangers tell you it's a horrible idea.
 Blah_User_Name
Joined: 8/27/2011
Msg: 11
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 4:40:05 PM
Can it work ? Yes. Does it most of the time ? No. We reach different phases of our lives as we get older and with each new phase comes change. Sometimes the difference in such an age gap doesn't always survive.

My grandfather was 26 years old than my grandmother. She was his second wife having lost his first in child birth.

I met someone when I was 17. He was 35. My parents objected and after a couple of years we parted ways only to get back together again when I was 22. Our relationship lasted another 5 years but for us, the differences between our ages was too great as I was full thrust into my career and he was winding his down for (very) early retirement.

My ex sister-in-law is 42. She's married to a man who is 66. They've been a couple for about 10 years now and have a young family.

Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Just like any other relationship. It's success or failure is unlikely to be age related and more to do with how well you jointly manage the significant challenges of just life.
 LiliMarleen
Joined: 5/24/2009
Msg: 12
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I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 4:42:11 PM
Umm, yes, anything can work, even the long shots.

And no, discounting the possibility that you may feel differently a few years from now, especially considering that you're not even dating the man yet, is not a sign of maturity, and neither is shooting snotty little barbs at posters who offer opinions divergent from yours.

So, no, I would not say based on your behavior here that you're exceptionally mature.
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 15
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I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 4:51:06 PM
THIS:


Just read your profile, "divorced"...guess age doesn't matter when it comes to being happy and smart does it? How did it work out for you????


Is proof positive that you are at least as immature as any twenty-anything year old out there, if not less so.

Sorry, but petulant and obviously vindictive, spiteful comebacks when someone politely explains a situation which bears directly on your own, and which you yourself posted here for comment, are not the sort of thing that a person "wise beyond their years" does.

Nor is bragging about how extra mature you are, a sign of maturity.

I do wish you luck in your endeavor. As an older gent myself, it would be nice to have someone younger find me that wonderful, though I can't imagine anyone THAT young being compatible as more than a friend. Just my tastes there, not a belief that it can't happen. I know couples that have made things work.
 Paddy_o_Lantern
Joined: 5/24/2012
Msg: 17
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 5:12:14 PM
Your IP suggests you are talking about someone else other than yourself OP.

If a 50 yr old can manage to keep an attractive 25 yr old happy without the enticement of a fat wallet that is happy to share then congadulations to him.

If you find a 50 yr old man's body attractive enough to keep you interested then I suggest you might need glasses or you have never dated any hot young men who knew what they were doing.

It could work but keep in mind that just because he looks like a 35 yr old at 50 it does not mean he is going to look like a 60 yr old when he is 75 and you are 50 and there are 50 yr old men interested in you who look and act like they could be in thier 40's.

Chances are you are not going to start looking significantly older till you hit your mid 30's. Chances are he is going to start looking significantly older starting now.

Also consider that peoples brains age as well as thier looks. Most people past the age of 50 are not getting any sharper - if you have the brain of a 40 yr old at 25 I pity you. Personally I would love to have the same brain now as I had at 20 or 25 ( almost as much as I would like to have the same body I had at that age even though it was skinny ) albiet with the life lessons I have learned intact.
 U make it entertaining
Joined: 7/17/2009
Msg: 18
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 5:32:46 PM

Just read your profile, "divorced"...guess age doesn't matter when it comes to being happy and smart does it? How did it work out for you????


LOL
Didn't like my answer Melissa?
So you decided to attack my divorced status?
Interesting.

You're 25.
No more needs to be said.
I've dealt with children your age before, and know fully well where it's coming from.
So sorry … I find no need to retaliate.

I watched my daughters maturity level increase 10 fold when she hit the age of 28.
And your parents will hopefully see the same.

As for this man you have an interest in.
I would be more concerned about his maturity level.
There are many … many … many threads on here about elderly men dating younger women.
Maybe you should familiarize yourself with them.

Honestly … what does a 50 year old man have in common with a 25 year old?
If there is some commonality, well then … that is quite an immature man that you are hoping to date.

Myself, (and I am sure others on this thread) would question his morals and values.
And for being 50, never married and no kids … that defiantly opens another "what the hell" question.

But then you go for it.
You will learn your lesson the hard way.
And really … that is the only way to learn.

Have fun!
 jblack2000
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 22
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 5:42:49 PM
He's taller than her, that's all that matters

Age, education, etc., those are secondary concerns for women

OP wouldn't be dating him if he was 4'11''

Can tell you that much
 Pinky127
Joined: 1/7/2012
Msg: 25
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 5:46:40 PM
OMFG...............look at your angry,immature responses on here and especially to Umakeit who always gives fair,unbiased responses.

You asked for opinions on here and when you read something you dont like,you immediately go into attack mode.
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 27
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 5:54:02 PM
OP, I don't see a particular problem with the age difference, though I wonder what is the real motivation behind your question when you seem determined to reject any advise you get.

Maybe you are afraid to stand up to your father and telling strangers to go to hell is easier?

And are you dependant on your father to live day to day? If so, can the 50 year old support you, or can you support yourself?
 U make it entertaining
Joined: 7/17/2009
Msg: 31
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 6:03:42 PM

better than being an old angry coot like yoursel


Because I don't agree with you, you call me names.
Is that how you deal with your parents too?
Very mature of you.


They would and are extremely jelous.....hint hint to the above "divorced" woman.


LOL!!!
Now that is so funny.
You go ahead and continue on with your tirade.
As I said ... enjoy.
Lifes lessons are learned via experience.

And maybe ... you should learn to talk to your parents instead of us on the forums.
Seems like you are wishing for a different type of father, one you CAN talk too.
Sad thing is ... you don't have to marry one to be able to talk to him.
Just work on correcting relationship with your parents.
Good luck.
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 32
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 6:12:15 PM
I didn't think the advice was hateful, though there was a touch of arrogance in the reply.


You think you are mature and so smart for being 25.
Come back when your 35 and let us know how it worked out.


However, you are escalating the debate by name calling, which isn't very mature.
 tygerpawn
Joined: 6/10/2012
Msg: 33
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 6:12:47 PM
Can it work? depends on the person Ive seen it worked and Ive seen it not working, you are probably mature for your age yes, but and I do say but, you may feel different when you hit 40 and in your prime and he will be a senior citizen and start slowing down, that is the only problem down the road, My neighbour is going through the same thing, she is 40 and he is 65 retired, she still working and you can see things are not kosher .

I say be careful and dont worry about others think especially the old ladies , tell them to kiss your ass and mind your own business, there is a reason why some of them are divorced
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 34
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 6:16:38 PM

you may feel different when you hit 40 and in your prime and he will be a senior citizen and start slowing down, that is the only problem is down the road,


I had a 20 year old wanted to meet me with the idea of getting married.

I was wondering if when I was 80 would I be OK with buying her a boy toy to keep her happy.

Right now I thought I would be OK with that, but maybe I get jealous when actually confronted by the situation.
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 35
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 6:23:15 PM
I've considered the OP's question very seriously and after much old man mental debate, I would have to say that yes, it could work. Personally though, if it was me in that situation, you would definitely have to go thru a few intial excercises for me before I would even consider the possibility. And yes, you will end up red faced,but., hey don't worry, this to will pass.


With,













experince.
 freespiritxoxx
Joined: 7/9/2011
Msg: 37
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 6:27:49 PM
yeah your a sweetie.... lol
your over 18 make your own decisions.... your remarks in the forums have shown how mature you are... your not... you don't have the life experiences.................. your parents can not tell you what to do... since they love you keep your attitude with them.................... best of luck
 Quasimodo11543
Joined: 7/21/2010
Msg: 38
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 6:29:52 PM
if you don't have a problem with it, and he doesn't have a problem with it. Why are you HERE, asking strangers about it? Your only concern seems to be with your family, and they seem to have spoken.
 freespiritxoxx
Joined: 7/9/2011
Msg: 39
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 6:39:24 PM
and she knows all this without even dating or kissing him............... lol too funny... sounds as tho she is trying to create drama with her parents.......................... rolls eyes.................. until you have dated him you have no clue whatsoever of your feelings for him or not or his for you................
 AlfredoDP
Joined: 5/31/2012
Msg: 40
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 6:41:42 PM
Melissa, it will not last. For the short, term enjoy.
Age, intellect, habits, culture, physical abilities...too much different.
Was involved with a woman 18 years younger; could not take being a therapist, friend, father, lover, and most of all, jealousy.
It was wonderful while it lasted.
 patientlillady
Joined: 5/20/2010
Msg: 41
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I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 6:42:01 PM
In 30 years, he'll be 80 and she'll still be young enough to go find another man when he keels over. Not trying to be morbid, however, I have a friend at work that's going through this right now.
 jblack2000
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 42
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 6:54:31 PM
I don't feel bad for the old ladies

They have the gall to criticize the old fogeys who want to date younger women, but some of them still only want to date men 6ft or taller.


Hypocrites!!!!!!!!!!!

I tell you what, we'll make a trade

Date men your same height, and old men will date women their same age

Even Stevens
 I-am-Rei
Joined: 9/11/2009
Msg: 43
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 6:55:34 PM
Most parents will disagree with their kid"s choices be it younger or older or same age level. They will always find something to disagree about.
However you were not yet dating so I would say go for it and date him first. If you want to prove something to your father then this is it, prove to him how responsible you would be with your life and your relationship. It may work or not in the long run but showing them how responsible and mature you are in handling the situation be it a success or a failure might earn you some respect from your parents.
Maturity is something we earned while we get old. Enjoy now and learn later. Work or not, it is something you will be proud of or ashamed of later in life depending on how you handled it.

Good luck.

 Blueline294
Joined: 3/28/2012
Msg: 44
I'm 25 yrs old, He is 50 yrs old....can it work???
Posted: 9/11/2012 6:58:28 PM
I was involved with a woman who was 26 and I was 45. Best damn five years I ever had. Without a doubt the most intelligent and caring woman I have ever known. And yeah she was drop dead gorgeous. Her parents ultimately proved too much however after they basically alienated her from her entire family.
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