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 paintroses
Joined: 7/18/2010
Msg: 1
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Student at 50+Page 1 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
I have recently gone back to college to get my bachelors. I was a kitchen and bath designer and due to our wonderful economy, like many, I faced lay off after layoff, so I decided to finish my education.

School has been a wonderful experience for me, and I have done well....BUT my questions is this.....

When someone views a profile, and at 50+ it shows you are a student, is that a big red flag? Does it give off a an air of , "I dont want to work hard?", Do you seem to stay away from those that arent working? (school however is very hard work)

Just curious
 softshoe100
Joined: 8/3/2011
Msg: 2
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Student at 50+
Posted: 9/25/2012 5:36:56 AM
I don't think it is a red flag. Just shows you are willing to keep learning and has nothing to do with not wanting to work,especially in your case. I think many people may be doing the same thing. Contrary to popular belief must people want a stable job where they don't have to keep looking for a new job. Good luck in your new endeavor.
 rearguard*2
Joined: 2/8/2008
Msg: 3
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Student at 50+
Posted: 9/25/2012 5:40:37 AM
Shows more that you are making plans to improve your situation, have ambition, are self motivated, have confidence in yourself, and believe there is some place to go in your life.

I guess some would take it as a negative, but you don't want to be with them anyway.....
 laskoboo
Joined: 2/12/2010
Msg: 4
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Student at 50+
Posted: 9/25/2012 7:48:45 AM
Not really a red flag but by age 50 you should already have a stable financial situation...
not going to school to expect anything other than better job opportunity... with full understanding your education will not ensure you find a job.

Would I pers0nally date a student ? it would depend on many factors but in general for me ast this age I
am most drawn to people who are winding down from a lifetime of work,... not going to school to find a job...


Do you seem to stay away from those that arent working? (school however is very hard work)


for dating, yeah pretty much would be a big stop sign for me.. unless he is going to school for a hobby, not a vocation. To each their own.
 laskoboo
Joined: 2/12/2010
Msg: 5
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Student at 50+
Posted: 9/25/2012 9:05:10 AM
I'm over 50...
worked all my life since age 14.. want to have fun now... student would not work for me unless the
class was golf or tennis lessons.
 LAgoodguy
Joined: 8/21/2008
Msg: 6
Student at 50+
Posted: 9/25/2012 10:17:57 AM
I took a few years ago I took some classes that I felt I needed for what I do, . Also planning on a few more classes at UCLA next year as well. But they are going to be evening classes and not full time. As I still run my bussiness, But if I meet someone who is a full time student with no job and not enough money saved up to live while they are in school. That would be a big red flag.
 U make it entertaining
Joined: 7/17/2009
Msg: 7
Student at 50+
Posted: 9/25/2012 11:41:17 AM
No I don't think it gives an air of "I don't want to work hard".
It says ... I want to upgrade, so I am back in school.

I went back to school when I was 46, after an 18 year stint for a major financial institution.
I had supported my family all those years doing something that I had to do ... not what I wanted to do.
Now I have my own business and am very happy with my life path.
I chose to leave my job, and move forward.
As long as I could support myself during the process, it should be a non issue.

However, with that being said, I have to admit that I have bypassed some men who had listed themselves as students.
It makes me wonder why they left or had no job.
I think they needed to explain that in their profile for me to understand the reasoning of them returning to school.
 LAgoodguy
Joined: 8/21/2008
Msg: 8
Student at 50+
Posted: 9/25/2012 1:15:06 PM
Many times when you hear the word student, What comes to mind is long hours to study and broke ( as in money)
Women who are in there 30s and up won't date a guy that is broke.. Most guys won't date cause the women would be a money pit. Now if you are in a relationship or married its a diffrent story. It realy comes down to money most of the time.
 authenticoutlook
Joined: 9/1/2012
Msg: 9
Student at 50+
Posted: 9/25/2012 1:45:41 PM
I just graduated in May.. never bothered anyone I dated. Never had a problem dating. Most kinda liked dating a school girl.
 Stray__Cat
Joined: 7/12/2006
Msg: 10
Student at 50+
Posted: 9/25/2012 2:37:05 PM
I think it is a green flag.
I admire people who constantly learn and grow.

You will be never boring
to the man lucky enuff to bump into you.
Cute and smart...
yeah, he'll be very blessed.
 Giggles10000
Joined: 6/17/2011
Msg: 11
Student at 50+
Posted: 9/25/2012 3:19:32 PM
Not really a red flag but by age 50 you should already have a stable financial situation...
not going to school to expect anything other than better job opportunity... with full understanding your education will not ensure you find a job.

Would I pers0nally date a student ? it would depend on many factors but in general for me ast this age I
am most drawn to people who are winding down from a lifetime of work,... not going to school to find a job...


Do you seem to stay away from those that arent working? (school however is very hard work)


for dating, yeah pretty much would be a big stop sign for me.. unless he is going to school for a hobby, not a vocation. To each their own.


This attitude is very much alive and well--but do you really want to be involved with someone who feels everyone else life has to go by their own standards.--

I lost everything when I had cancer--6 months between long term disability kicking in and short term ending, added on top of having a baby two years before and a bi-polar husband who each day was losing his grip of reality, life happens and it is easy to want to ball up and just exist. It is very hard work going back to school, it is also hard to get people to accept that your college work is important especially when they want to do something and you have a big project or exam due.

I even had one man tell me that if I played my cards right and quit studying and came and hung out with him that I wouldnt have to worry about graduating from college cause he was loaded.

However, I also find that some men could not be more supportive, it just depends on the individual--again if they have an issue with it --it tells more about them and who and what they are about than it does you!
 Orgulloso
Joined: 8/28/2010
Msg: 12
Student at 50+
Posted: 9/25/2012 3:31:32 PM
OP,

It's not a red flag, I changed careers and then started my family so college had to be put on the back burner for awhile. I'm 51 and have been taking online courses towards my Bachelors.

I think it's ridiculous to close this thread because "it should be obvious". That's moronic.
 1388SmartBlonde
Joined: 5/15/2011
Msg: 13
Student at 50+
Posted: 9/25/2012 3:32:42 PM
I just finished my AA degree but did not list myself as a student because I was working FT while attending school part-time. I am taking some time off work to look into apprenticeships or furthering my education since I have other sources of income (rental property, investments) but I think some people see not working at a job as a negative. Put "Other" if you are uncomfortable putting down that you are a student. It is more for POF's targeted advertising than for dating purposes anyway.
 BlackLady1953
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 14
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Student at 50+
Posted: 9/25/2012 4:44:07 PM
Constantly learning and growing is a good thing.....but I always caution older students that you can get yourselves into thousands of dollars of debt, and still not find a job commensurate with the $ you have put into your education, and find yourself paying off student loans with your social security check. I've seen that happen countless times.

As for me.....I'll be retiring within 18 months or so, and do plan to take some courses in another field of endeavor. I have a friend whose desire was to go to law school, and he did it after he retired at age 62. He paid for it out of retirement funds, and now at age 72, he is an elder law attorney, and loving it!
 Gwendolyn2010
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 15
Student at 50+
Posted: 9/25/2012 4:56:04 PM
It might be a red flag to some, but not to everyone. I returned to school at 48 to get my MA, and it didn't seem to bother anyone.

I am presently dating a man who is a student. He is dirt poor, but he is smart, funny, and getting an education. The biggest problem is that between classes, working part-time, and his other commitments, it is hard to find time to see each other.
 LuvADKs
Joined: 8/31/2011
Msg: 16
Student at 50+
Posted: 9/25/2012 5:54:42 PM
On the contrary, I am more concerned with 50-somethings who list "some college" for their education. Makes me wonder if they can't finish something they started. Kudos to you for getting more education!
 littleflower57
Joined: 9/15/2012
Msg: 17
Student at 50+
Posted: 9/25/2012 9:02:22 PM
Learning = Growth. The day you stop growing is the day you start dying. So, it's only going to be a red flag to those who stopped learning and started dying. Do you wanna be with some old dead person?
 Tarnished_Knight
Joined: 3/5/2009
Msg: 18
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Student at 50+
Posted: 9/25/2012 9:38:28 PM
Darlin',

I think it is commendable. And if anyone questions your status sincerely, give 'em the low down as to the why. There ain't nothing wrong with improving your lot in life and if that means going back to school to do so, well howdy do.

When I earned my JD I was considered a non-traditional student as I was already older than the typical student, even in law school. But even then there were a handful of my classmates who were considerably older than I. One was a professor from back east who was, let's say, intellectually restless and another who was looking for a career change. The former went back east with his newly minted law degree and I think moved into a different position at his college; the latter practiced law south of here for a spell and eventually was elected to the position of judge.

Recently, well a couple of years ago, I was taking some MBA courses at the local U and had the pleasure of taking classes with some of the men (no women) who had worked for years at a local mill that closed the year or so before. Talk about a change!

So, for me, I would tend to give an older student the benefit of the doubt as to their student status. I like minds that don't stagnate.

TK
 starman89506
Joined: 6/22/2008
Msg: 19
Student at 50+
Posted: 9/25/2012 9:39:55 PM
The only men that matter to you are the ones who would see it as a positive action. Any man with a negitive opinion of what you are doing is not someone you really want to spend any time with.
 1388SmartBlonde
Joined: 5/15/2011
Msg: 20
Student at 50+
Posted: 9/25/2012 9:40:10 PM
#18 Sunny NY days:
Don't forget the era we came from...needing a collge degree to get a great job wasn't as much of a requirement back when we "Over 45'ers" were getting our careers started. Some college or an AA/AS or trade school was sufficient to get a decent paying job. It wasn't so much not being able to finish as not needing to finish, because good paying jobs trumped poor student aid. A lot of the people I graduated high school with went straight into the factories here and they still earn more than I ever will.

Today the reverse is true, factory jobs are scarce and most employers require a degree for jobs that used to only require a high school education. I used to work for the community college where I earned my degree and we had a lot of "non-traditional" students who were getting out of dying fields and re-training for a different career. Even people with advanced degrees were coming back to get their skills updated. These days, with online and evening classes, adult students are as much the norm as high school graduates...the job market demands it.
 stayinalivefl
Joined: 8/23/2012
Msg: 21
Student at 50+
Posted: 9/26/2012 7:57:43 AM
When someone views a profile, and at 50+ it shows you are a student, is that a big red flag? Does it give off a an air of , "I dont want to work hard?",,,,,,,,,,who wants to work construction in 40 degree weather in Florida,,,,,,I've had enough of that crap ,........I'm about 1/2 way to a bachelors,,,,,,,give me a comfy office,,,,lol

,,,,,,,and a hot secretary,,,,,,,lol
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 22
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Student at 50+
Posted: 9/26/2012 9:46:02 PM
Won't be 50 till February, but I'm a full time student also.

Hasn't been an issue in the least......and actually has gotten me more attention that I care to have!!
 vestaceres
Joined: 6/13/2012
Msg: 23
Student at 50+
Posted: 9/27/2012 5:48:51 AM
I think it's a very bold and courageous decision to make in one's life, no matter the age. Your return to school shows a strong commitment to yourself -- and it's HARD WORK that takes up your every thinking moment.

The fact that you were a business owner and designer before you returned to school will benefit your education exponentially and more so than going the traditional route; you may be in mixed classes of traditional and adult students, and believe me, your classmates will benefit from your presented experiences as you will benefit from their youthful take of the world.

I always support the experiential learning that life experiences can give you and then go to school to polish it all. It has been my experience, though, that returning the school healed me in ways I had not expected.

I don't see how it's a red flag. A solid human being who isn't threatened by your academic development will support you in your academic endeavors (and I mean support in the way of not shooting you down in the process).

Best wishes.
 SSC-SAF
Joined: 5/20/2012
Msg: 24
Student at 50+
Posted: 9/27/2012 10:03:11 AM
OP, good for you for pursuing a new degree. I do think you should explain in your profile what you are doing and why, just the couple of lines that you put in your O Post. It's admirable that you are doing this instead of sitting around whining about how you lost your job.

I agree with vestaceres's post above. I went back to get an MBA at age 40 and it was the best thing I ever did for myself. I had excellent support at home even though it took me four years of making up undergraduate prerequisites, going year round part time while working full time. I wish you much success!
 Roman de la Rose
Joined: 4/10/2009
Msg: 25
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Student at 50+
Posted: 9/27/2012 10:46:34 AM
It's hard work but well worth it on a personal level. Good luck with your studies, OP.
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