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 AUTHOR
 ConnorTheHunter
Joined: 6/23/2012
Msg: 1
Actually successfully finding someone on this sitePage 1 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
its a question that plagues alot of new comers to this site. I have come and gone from time to time and i have yet to meet anyone worth while. I dont know if it is something im doing wrong or what. Honestly i would rather meet someone offline but with my busy life i have channeled my attempts at a relationship to POF. any ideas to help with this?
 _TALL_IQ2_
Joined: 2/10/2010
Msg: 2
Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 10/23/2012 10:43:55 PM
Honestly i would rather meet someone offline but with my busy life i have channeled my attempts at a relationship

So go OUT to your local meetup social groups at least weekly and DO meet people offline. Then make friends there over time in person,
and don't ever feel you must rely on so-called "dating" websites for human relationships.

Some of us here are aliens.
 zurichdublin188
Joined: 8/14/2012
Msg: 3
Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 10/23/2012 11:14:45 PM
Hey...go ahead and bash online dating all you want...

Then try going out in the real world...picking up women in bars...

Go approach total strangers on the street and see what that gets you.

Rely on your parents to set you up with someone from thier church...

See how that works.

ONLINE DATING IS THE ONLY WAY TO GO

EVERY person who got married at the company that I worked with for the past 8 years (Hewlett Packerd) married a person who LITERALLY WORKED IN THE SAME OFFICE BUILDING, SAME FLOOR AND USUALLY THE GUY THAT WORKED ON THE NEXT DESK OVER FROM THEM.

I say trying to date "offline" is pre-historic and just plain silly.

Don't even bother.
 LinuxD
Joined: 12/6/2008
Msg: 4
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Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 10/23/2012 11:27:01 PM
Abandon all hope. It seems that the day before you signed up here the last good woman was taken. You are stuck with the unfit and imbalanced.

You are doomed... Doomed I tell you.
 zurichdublin188
Joined: 8/14/2012
Msg: 5
Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 10/24/2012 12:15:53 AM
I have met women off these sites that are absolutely AMAZING that I never would have met in real life in 10,000 years.

I am talking about women who were Harvard Graduate School Students, women who were gorgeous, women who were making $200,000 per year...ect., ect.

The problem is you have to be willing to work your way through 10,000 profiles...

It doesn't matter.

Its worth it.
 warmheart050
Joined: 2/4/2011
Msg: 6
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Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 10/24/2012 12:18:52 AM
well to be honest I havent heard of one success story yet :)
 warmheart050
Joined: 2/4/2011
Msg: 7
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Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 10/24/2012 12:20:28 AM
on a positive note you do gain friends along the way:)
 zurichdublin188
Joined: 8/14/2012
Msg: 8
Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 10/24/2012 12:20:32 AM
Oh...dude I am serious. At Hewlett Packard...(don't get me wrong a lot of those people were Tech Geeks and had no social skills)...there were about 10-12 people who got married...

Every couple...was two people who literally married someone who worked ON THE SAME DAMN FLOOR...

It was assinine.

They literally took whoever tripped over them on their way to pick up a glass of coffee...

You talk about socially retarded! Computer Engineers!!!
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 9
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Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 10/24/2012 4:34:07 AM
OP: Just look at yourself. Turn what you are saying around slightly.

Do you think that YOU are a "worth while person?" I imagine you do.

Okay, so you come and go, like someone stopping by a bar or a club every now and then, and poking their head in the door. You hang around a while, don't get turned on, and head away again.

Any chance, do you think, that other people behave as you do? And that just as the logic of thinking that because you don't see the gal of your dreams at the bar, on the few days you happen by, that therefore the BAR is the problem, that since you haven't yet run across the woman you want here (or on another site) that therefore all online dating is bogus?
 ConnorTheHunter
Joined: 6/23/2012
Msg: 10
Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 10/24/2012 5:14:00 AM
i highly doubt anyone with a Harvard degree is going to waste their time on this site
 LiliMarleen
Joined: 5/24/2009
Msg: 11
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Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 10/24/2012 5:29:02 AM
Oh man, this negativity is killing me.

I met an absolutely wonderful man here, and we've been together for almost two years. And for the Ivy League junkies among you, he has a law degree AND a PhD from flippin' Columbia.

Quality people are on here, you just have to attract them.
 Yule_liquor
Joined: 12/7/2011
Msg: 12
Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 10/24/2012 5:40:24 AM
@Conner

Man, you are 22 yrs old!
WTF are you doing on a dating site; you should be turning the world up side down
As busy as you may be (hopefully with work or school).
you should have the time & energy to find someone who is a good for you, especially if you are in school
How do you think they did it in the days before dating-sites appeared.
Dating sites are a shot-in-the dark;
yes, you might meet some pple, but the odds of finding your soulmate are small,
as you have to sift through lots of fake and dishonest profiles
On-line dating should be your last resort!
P.S: I'm assuming you are up-front and don't have any psychological issues that keep you from meeting pple,
and staying in a stable relationship
 LiliMarleen
Joined: 5/24/2009
Msg: 13
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Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 10/24/2012 5:49:33 AM
Oh yes, and that terrific man I'm with is black, incidentally. There are good men of all races, here and everywhere.
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 14
Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 10/24/2012 6:41:23 AM
Think about dating in general as Farming. Yes, farming. How boring can that be. What is it that you do in farming. You find fields with dirt, with manure, with the remnants of the past. You grab seeds of whatever it is you want to grow and you start spreading it all over, over and over and over and over. You spread seeds over rocks, over low lands that get too much water, hillsides where the rains will take the seeds with the run off. You don't stop, but cover all the area that is available for you. Then you wait, or go do something else. Or find another field and spread your seeds.
Then you notice all the places where the seeds did not take. But then you notice the fields where they did take. But you are going to hit a drouth, storms, tornadoes, the works. And out of all that you will reap a harvest, maybe not a big one, but one never-the-less.

So, translate to dating. Your seeds are your attempts to communicate. They serve two purposes. One. Make contact. Two. Teach you a language of communication that resonates with a particular type of mate so they can dig you. Your fields are real life, the coffee shop, POF, other sites, some free, some for money. When ever something does not take in a field, it doesn't mean that field is barren and it will not work. It simply means that you need to use a different type of seed, meaning approach, and it means that the situation was not optimal.

I am for instance against mass emails because they do not teach YOU anything. But if you take your time to craft a quick email to a single person, that is personal and resonates with something about them, and pictures something unique about you. It will work. In another site, when I used it, I was able to have two dates a week, constantly and consistently. Here, I practically got nothing, yet it was a lady I contacted through here the one that took and we are doing quite well.

So, you see, you never know. So keep trying. Cover all your fields.
 femaleconnection
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 15
Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 10/24/2012 8:23:30 AM

i highly doubt anyone with a Harvard degree is going to waste their time on this site


I cant speak for Harvard grads being here, by my provincial and city University and College have plenty of graduates here. I personally know many graduates now in professional careers who are here, looking. My dentist is on here and one of my specialists in Neurology is here too! Both nice people, looking.

Yes, we have to weed out thousands of profiles that dont/wont suit us, but there are good people on here.

I met the current man Im dating here. I met him many years ago. We were in very different places in life when we first met, but we kept in touch. We genuinly liked one another as people but our lifestyles at the time didnt mesh up. That was back in 2005. Eventually, we ended up in the same place, ready for more and voila...dating now.

If you keep an open mind and dont expact 'instant anything'...it can work for you.
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 16
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Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 10/24/2012 11:51:30 AM
You have as much chance as anyone else, and you have as much chance here as anywhere else. We come into contact with people all the time, it's random, who knows when or where you will meet someone you find interesting and who feels the same about you. This site is nothing more than another way to find people, it's not your last hope and it sure shouldn't be that big a deal in your life. It's just a place where lots of people are available to contact.
 ARTSYLADEEEE
Joined: 9/7/2011
Msg: 17
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Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 10/24/2012 1:24:38 PM

its a question that plagues alot of new comers to this site. I have come and gone from time to time and i have yet to meet anyone worth while. I dont know if it is something im doing wrong or what. Honestly i would rather meet someone offline but with my busy life i have channeled my attempts at a relationship to POF. any ideas to help with this?


Sounds like you spend way too much time on the computer. Get a life. There's an election coming up, get out and volunteer for the candidate of your choice. I see several involved young women at the office that I volunteer at.
 the_biggavell
Joined: 7/9/2012
Msg: 19
Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 10/26/2012 7:37:42 AM
It's plenty of fish buddy... what are the fish?? Women... don't ever let them tel you different. They are fish, just swimming around. So you gotta get the right bait to catch them or get out the water and try catching bunnies, deer or if your man enough, a bear. Mainly dude.. it's your fault.

Now get some bait and start catching so you can show some friends what you caught, before you throw it back in the water.
 TantricJedi
Joined: 2/22/2012
Msg: 20
Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 10/26/2012 12:47:05 PM
Online dating is a great way to meet attractive strangers. Stay positive and keep your expectations low. Most of all, have fun:)
 Tallandsexy1
Joined: 11/15/2010
Msg: 21
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Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 10/30/2012 10:09:44 AM
Ive dated some men from POF, but most are douche bags and want sex on first date sick of the class-Less society we live in today where men think just cause they buy you dinner or a drink they have full rights keep dreaming idiots.. Ive been told this by other men is a pick up site and have to say thats what I get in emails. I do have some that are legit but not my type sorry if I dont answer your email then stop emailing me guy's cause Im not attracted to you ok..
My sister use to use these free sites she said, It's free so the quality of men are going to be bad but sometimes I meet men I like but havent met any serious minded men who want a relationship with me that I was attracted to have to have chemistry also which seems to be hard to find in love..
 Tallandsexy1
Joined: 11/15/2010
Msg: 22
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Posted: 10/30/2012 10:12:28 AM
I'm sure you get all the sweet talking men who want to get down your pants most are liars..
 MiaIris
Joined: 4/30/2010
Msg: 23
Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 1/5/2013 4:11:21 AM
I don't know what you constitute as success, finding a relationship or a lifetime commitment. Personally for me. I developed a 2-year relationship from meeting someone on this site. He wasn't the love of my life but still one of my most favourite people despite the relationship not working out in the long run.
 MiaIris
Joined: 4/30/2010
Msg: 24
Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 1/5/2013 5:13:38 AM
I disagree that the onus is on us. To some degree it is true how we relate to others paves the way for relationship success but other factors like proximity or moving in different social circles (if at all) come to play as well. Sites like POF bring together people that otherwise would not meet.
 rockondon
Joined: 2/21/2007
Msg: 26
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Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 1/7/2013 2:02:00 PM
The irony is that the women you met on pof probably haven't met anyone worthwhile either.
Think about that.
 IPromise2Please
Joined: 6/26/2012
Msg: 27
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Actually successfully finding someone on this site
Posted: 1/10/2013 10:10:45 AM
Its rather easy to find someone on this site. Finding someone worth chatting with and eventually meeting is a totally different story. It depends on what you want. I wont talk about my experiences on here because then it will sound like I have a thing against women lol But its a free site so you cant expect much in terms of a serious relationship.
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