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 AUTHOR
 U make it entertaining
Joined: 7/17/2009
Msg: 4
Dating and HerpesPage 1 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
I don't understand why you would even contemplate have sex without precautions.
Now you will be paying the price for the rest of your life.

On a lighter note ... 80% of the population have some form of herpes
Most have cold sores.
Keep in mind that those that do have cold sores, they can easily be passed down under if your are performing oral while you have an outbreak.

As for advice on how to deal with this.
ALWAYS wear protection.
DO NOT go without and pass this on to anyone else.

You are now responsible to inform your potential partner.
Be prepared that most will run.
 aussieblues
Joined: 11/22/2011
Msg: 6
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History
Dating and Herpes
Posted: 11/3/2012 4:31:07 PM
The use of condoms cannot prevent the spread of Herpes, unless you're wearing a "Full Body Condom." Blisters can occur on any part of the genitalia; ie, labia, scrotum and therfore condoms are useless.
Herpes is a virus which stays with you for life, yet is episodic. Stress can bring on an outbreak.
You are only able to spread the virus when you have symtoms/Blisters active. My advice would be to keep it to yourself. If you're in a relationship and have an outbreak, then tell your partner that you must abstain from intercourse untill you finish your anti-virals and your symptoms have disapeared. How your partner takes it is another thing.
 enriquez1
Joined: 12/7/2009
Msg: 11
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Dating and Herpes
Posted: 11/3/2012 6:11:17 PM
i can go out with you
 Bebedeleau
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 13
Dating and Herpes
Posted: 11/3/2012 8:10:41 PM
It has been estimated that about 20% of the population have genital herpes and 90% have oral herpes (cold sores).

Every 30 seconds, another person gets genital herpes. The number of cases of genital herpes has gone up by over 30% in the last decade.

If the number of people infected with genital herpes continues to grow at the present rate, it is predicted that in time nearly half the US adult population will have genital herpes.

Found this looking it up online.
 ravenhair4u
Joined: 8/13/2011
Msg: 16
Dating and Herpes
Posted: 11/4/2012 11:14:42 AM
I think you're handeling the situation well.
I've used condoms as my birth control my entire life. I will not have sex with out it, period. This is what you're going to have get used to. I wish you had used them before, as a condom could have prevented this, but, you can only go foward from this point on.
I've heard so many excuses from guys who don't want to or like to wear them. It sucks, as I have to mention it beforehand, as you will have to also. Sometimes it never happens because they claim they can't preform with it or they refuse to wear it. It's normal for me to have sex with condoms & I'm glad I had to use them to prevent another pregnancy, I'm sure it also protected me from other things along the way as well.
I advise you to buy them & always have them, you can never depend on the guy to have them, they will always try to find a way to have sex with out wearing one. Even though they know they're risking disease, they think in the moment of how good it feels.
 PaminSD
Joined: 2/25/2012
Msg: 17
Dating and Herpes
Posted: 11/4/2012 11:30:30 AM
OP, why are you telling your parents? I do not think you need to tell them.
 Deadliest_Snatch
Joined: 10/25/2012
Msg: 18
Dating and Herpes
Posted: 11/4/2012 1:03:32 PM

The use of condoms would've prevented this, but I'm not your Mother...


OP - I stand corrected; I apologize.


???? OMG!!! A mother and child reunion!!!!
 Bebedeleau
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 24
Dating and Herpes
Posted: 11/6/2012 4:20:28 PM
Ok, so you see 10 guys. Two of them have herpes. It shouldn't be really hard to find one you like who has them also for sex or a relationship. It's knowing who has it that is the hard part.

I don't have it, I hope I never do. There's enough in life to deal with without adding one more thing, but if I did, I'd just deal with it. I know a few people that have to live with that, and it's not fun. Varies, though ... one female friend says she rarely breaks out and when she does it's always before her period. Her husband of 20 years has never gotten it (she feels it coming on, and outbreak, though I see many posts saying you can spread it not during an outbreak). The same case for my neighbor, who said her husband has never gotten it. Another female friend said if she keeps her stress level down, that helps. I've only been told by one male, and he said the outbreaks hurt, and made him feel nauseous.

Good for you for being responsible and honest. I hope it continues. I would probably stop having sex for a long while if it was me. I probably wouldn't tell anyone during that time and definitely not my parents. It sounds like you are a lot more confident, especially for only knowing two weeks (?). I think there are herpes dating sites too. Takes the pressure of informing off of you.

To answer your question, I would not want to date someone with it just because the chance of the relationship working alone is iffy, so who expose myself to the lifetime hassle. If I met someone I really thought I'd want to marry and spend the rest of my life with, that might be a different story. I'd have to see if and when that happened.
 BlaineV
Joined: 7/13/2008
Msg: 34
Dating and Herpes
Posted: 11/12/2012 10:39:12 AM
Cold sores are an entirely different disease than genital herpes. You can pass it on to someone else's genitals through oral sex, but it's highly unlikely, unless there was a cold sore present.

Oral sex is VERY low risk, when it comes to transmission of herpes
 U make it entertaining
Joined: 7/17/2009
Msg: 36
Dating and Herpes
Posted: 11/12/2012 1:14:46 PM

Cold sores are an entirely different disease than genital herpes. You can pass it on to someone else's genitals through oral sex, but it's highly unlikely, unless there was a cold sore present.

Oral sex is VERY low risk, when it comes to transmission of herpes


Bullshit!
What world you living in Blaine.
One with blinders.
Someone I know received genital herpes from sticking his penis into a woman's mouth when she had a cold sore.
Now I call that a blow job ... also known as oral sex.
He was not a very smart man.

How about you go out and try it ... come back and let us know if it's fact or fiction.
 ARTSYLADEEEE
Joined: 9/7/2011
Msg: 37
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Dating and Herpes
Posted: 11/12/2012 2:56:31 PM
There are herpes dating sites.
 BlaineV
Joined: 7/13/2008
Msg: 38
Dating and Herpes
Posted: 11/12/2012 10:54:11 PM

Someone I know received genital herpes from sticking his penis into a woman's mouth when she had a cold sore.


You need to go back and reread what I wrote:

"You can pass it on to someone else's genitals through oral sex, but it's highly unlikely, UNLESS THERE WAS A COLD SORE PRESENT!!!"
 Bebedeleau
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 40
Dating and Herpes
Posted: 11/13/2012 5:34:33 AM
I think you are confusing it with HPV also, as it is the most common viral STD currently. 50% of all sexually active people have HPV at some point. The good news ... HPV will generally go away on its own within a few months to a couple years in those with a healthy immune system. People don't know they have it until they get cervical cancer or an outbreak of warts.

Eat your veggies and drink your tea!!
 HennyLopez
Joined: 10/2/2012
Msg: 41
Dating and Herpes
Posted: 11/15/2012 12:06:59 AM
Yes please tell me about it. I met a woman from pof not to long go. She told me recently that she was diagnosed with herpes 2 weeks ago. She told me she'd understand if I didn;t want to talk to her anymore. She is a cool woman so i told her don't sweat and continued talking to her. I also love the fact that she told me ahead of time. What is the caution I should have other than unprotected sex. I don't want to ask her a million questions about it cause I don't want to make it all about her having an std. Please help.
 Deadliest_Snatch
Joined: 10/25/2012
Msg: 42
Dating and Herpes
Posted: 11/15/2012 6:15:29 AM
You should find out what a "dental dam" is.

In addition, read this:

http://www.cdc.gov/std/herpes/

http://www.cdc.gov/std/herpes/STDFact-herpes.htm
 Deadliest_Snatch
Joined: 10/25/2012
Msg: 44
Dating and Herpes
Posted: 11/15/2012 7:54:06 PM
Oh, the humanity!

Ditto for the virus for Shingles. So...if I understand correctly if you had chicken pox as a kid, you have the same virus inside you that causes Herpes and Shingles?


NO. All types of herpes are caused by a virus. Herpes that is transmitted sexually (or by kissing) is herpes simplex and is NOT the same as the type that causes chicken pox (herpes zoster). I had chicken pox as a child and had shingles as an adult. I have NEVER had a "cold sore" or any lesion from herpes simplex type 1 or 2.


Types of Herpes
Herpes is a very common infection. Caused by two different (yet closely related viruses) called herpes simplex virus type 1 and herpes simplex virus type 2, the disease is easy to catch. Both forms can infect the mouth and genital area, sometimes at the same time. Oral herpes describes cold sores and/or fever blisters that land on or near the mouth while genital herpes refers to sores that appear below the waist including on and in the genital area. A third kind of herpes virus, known as herpes zoster produces chicken pox and shingles.


http://www.herpes-help.us/types_of_herpes.php

You can only get shingles by previously having chicken pox (typically as a juvenile).
Please try to get correct info. That is how these things spread - through ignorance.
 Tarnished_Knight
Joined: 3/5/2009
Msg: 46
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Dating and Herpes
Posted: 11/18/2012 9:36:08 PM
Ms. Freak,

While I generally agree with your post, at least most of the generalities, your are quite wrong in your dismissal of HSV I/II as not a death sentence. In rare circumstances HSV can cause death - notice I said rare. Further, HSV can cause complications that are debilitating. While HSV I/II usually is no more consequential that an irritating "cold sore" or lesion it can be much worse. And, yes, while HSV I/II outbreaks can decrease in frequency or severity as one ages, it is also true that the opposite can happen.

I am not one to scream the that the sky is falling when discussing HSV I/II (this attitude largely arose decades ago in response to other severe STD outbreaks related to promiscuity and unsafe sexual practices) the truth is that for a certain portion of the population the sky could fall.

TK
[take time to do a search for images of severe HSV lesions, ocular lesions, and then dismiss its potential adversity]
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