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 imaginess
Joined: 9/15/2010
Msg: 1
Getting absolutely nowhere, please review and helpPage 1 of 1    
So after reading a few of the profiles from other reviewers in this forum, I think my profile is a little safe, if not boring.
Even though I am really funny, I have never considered taking my profile in that direction. I always figured I could show my humor while on a date. The problem is I am not getting any dates. or many responses at all for that matter.
So what do you all think? Before making any changes I would like to gauge what everyone thinks of it right now.
 NatureGirlMaggie
Joined: 12/20/2011
Msg: 2
Getting absolutely nowhere, please review and help
Posted: 1/30/2013 12:51:45 PM
First of all, lose all the group shots -- I don't want to work to figure out who the people are with you, who is the pretty lady, and which one in the photo group shots is you? Is that your daughter? Because you didn't say anything about her. I would personally lose the pic of you drinking like a fish, that is not funny, it indicates that you are an alcoholic partier, as do some of the other pics. Major turn off. Face and shoulder shots, smiling, full body shot, plain and ordinary stuff, but don't look intense or scarey.

Now, about the copy -- lose the disclaimer about the favorites on the bottom -- finish the sentence in the "second date" comment at bottom, it is hanging.

The dogs, the cooking, and the harmonica -- those are areas that I'd personally like to see expanded on just a bit. You are right in that you don't come off as all humorous or all that interesting -- can you do so in the areas of dogs, cooking, or blues-playinng? You want your personality to shine through, and it does not. First impression -- your pics present you in one way (a partier), but your copy is very serious and doesn't reflect your true persona apparently. It would be confusing for me, and I'd probably pass you right up. But that's me.

Good luck, let us see your revised copy.
 Mr_Smrt
Joined: 9/21/2006
Msg: 3
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Getting absolutely nowhere, please review and help
Posted: 1/30/2013 1:27:21 PM
Dude you can never fail by just being yourself, make the profile funny. You don't have to explain yourself like your being interrogated, that's what dates are for, leave stuff to talk about and explain later. Women love to talk. Be honest!, in your interests if you like boobs and bush put it in there. If you are funny put it in there, show them.

EXAMPLE 1

"I'm 6'0" on paper, but 6'11" when you tickle me"

EXAMPLE 2

"When I play the harmonica, my pups move like they're in Riverdance"

"One could say I'm the alpha male, when I enter my house, my dogs part like the red sea. Moses has nothing on me"
 Indira46
Joined: 8/19/2012
Msg: 4
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Getting absolutely nowhere, please review and help
Posted: 1/30/2013 1:37:47 PM
Don't write any of that garbage the above poster suggested.
It's useless garbage. It's not funny. It's not creative.
 Indira46
Joined: 8/19/2012
Msg: 5
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Getting absolutely nowhere, please review and help
Posted: 1/30/2013 1:41:07 PM
Your photos are all terrible. Your main photo is the only half decent one. Delete all of the rest. No group photos. No pics with women

Delete the last part about the favorites list. Seriously.

Add a paragraph describing the type of woman you seek and some fun activities to enjoy together.

Give yourself some personality traits.
 Mr_Smrt
Joined: 9/21/2006
Msg: 6
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Getting absolutely nowhere, please review and help
Posted: 1/30/2013 1:48:05 PM
it's not garbage its called personality!! why do you want him being like everyone else?
 Hapworth
Joined: 9/23/2009
Msg: 7
Getting absolutely nowhere, please review and help
Posted: 1/30/2013 1:52:11 PM
NatureGirl nailed the number-one problem. Your photos look like they were all taken on one night (one CRAZY night), which is not the message you want to send if you are looking for a relationship. Also, potential partners do not want to see you with other people. Yeah, this might not be logical, but if you think of the online universe, it makes sense. No one wants to see you snuggling up with a hot, pretty "friend." No one wants to see you partying with the crew. You are forty!!! Your written profile suggests that you are looking for that special someone, but your photos and your attitude (I am thinking of the line in your written section where you brag that you do not look as old as you are) all scream: MIDLIFE CRISIS!!!!

This might be completely false, but what so many here on POF do not realize (and I've viewed dozens, maybe hundreds, of profiles) is that you have to sell yourself online. Right now, your advertisement (this is what a POF profile is, if we're being honest) screams, "I am in a midlife crisis. Who wants to party with me???"

Your "About Me" section is okay. The opening paragraph is a bit banal, but I'm corny enough to sense that it's kind of sweet and might move women.

The other paragraphs feel generic. Again, you need to sell yourself. You need to communicate that you are not like any other 40-something looking for a date. How are you unique? Are you witty? If so, how can you show this? What kind of woman are you looking for? Your "About Me" section does the job, but it's not extraordinary.

I'd like to see you create an extraordinary profile, because clearly you have so many positive qualities. You are young-looking, you are fairly attractive (I'm guessing, for I am not gay), you own your own home on Long Island, you cook!!!! You've got a lot to offer, but I don't think that your current profile is communicating this.

Best,

Hapworth
 Mr_Smrt
Joined: 9/21/2006
Msg: 8
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Getting absolutely nowhere, please review and help
Posted: 1/30/2013 2:00:17 PM
HAP you nailed it man!, my pics suck honestly but you know what, my profile works, I'm not a follower I'm a leader. Why my profile works is because I'm honest. I'm not a smiler, I've got one where I'm smiling, but I'am happy
 daysleeper5
Joined: 11/6/2009
Msg: 9
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Getting absolutely nowhere, please review and help
Posted: 1/30/2013 2:12:18 PM
Whoaaa Hapworth, slow down there. Sometimes you're right on with your comments, but you're way off on this one. Where do you see 'mid-life crisis'? The guy is only 40 and it's not like he's hanging out with a bunch of teenagers in his pictures. Have you ever been to a karaoke night at a bar? It's not exactly spring break. Nothing crazy going on there. Some of the bars I personally hang out in probably have a median age of 33, so don't make all kinds of generalizations about people in bars based on their age. You wouldn't catch me at a college bar and that's all that matters. I doubt the OP is hitting on Hofstra girls (LI college).

He does have too many pictures of him holding a drink, but that's easily fixable. His main photo needs to be a better lit close-up.

OP, there are a couple of lines that are for sure hurting your profile.


If you are in my favorites, it doesn't necessarily mean you are my "favorite". Just that I want to go back and re-read your profile before I decide to email you. That doesn't mean you can't reach out and contact me first.

That being said, why haven't we met yet?


Women don't need to be lectured about the use of 'favorites' on here. It makes you sound like you're annoyed at them and it's a tad whiny. The other sentence from your First Date section smells of desperation.
 Hapworth
Joined: 9/23/2009
Msg: 10
Getting absolutely nowhere, please review and help
Posted: 1/30/2013 4:30:43 PM

Whoaaa Hapworth, slow down there. Sometimes you're right on with your comments, but you're way off on this one.


Fair enough. But the great thing about online democracy is that Imagines can decide for himself what advice makes sense, what advice doesn't. To me, the OP's photos are all "nightlife" shots. Did I go far in suggesting that he's going through a midlife crisis (I hint in my post that this might not be fact)? Maybe? But I stand by my assessment that this is how a woman who knows nothing about Imagines might imagine him, right or wrong.
 daysleeper5
Joined: 11/6/2009
Msg: 11
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Getting absolutely nowhere, please review and help
Posted: 1/30/2013 4:47:55 PM
The mid-life crisis was yesterday with the Dad from the suburbs wanting to know why he couldn't get the "hot babes." LOL

I guess we have different perspectives. I live closer to this guy so when I look at his pics, I don't see 'nightlife.' I've done those karaoke nights and trust me, most of the people that go to them are over 30 and 40. It's fun, but nobody's lying on top of the bar while having tequila poured into their mouth. :D
 ouija2013
Joined: 12/9/2012
Msg: 12
Getting absolutely nowhere, please review and help
Posted: 1/30/2013 4:52:19 PM
From your user name I thought you were a woman
Run with that Doll, best bit of advice I have
and 40 is middle aged, most men die around 80, just saying :P
 daysleeper5
Joined: 11/6/2009
Msg: 13
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Getting absolutely nowhere, please review and help
Posted: 1/30/2013 4:58:37 PM

and 40 is middle aged, most men die around 80,


Even more reason to go out and have some fun...while you still can! lol

Neither of my grandfathers made it to 80, so I'm already past the halfway mark. Young lady, would you mind holding my oxygen tank while I change my IV bag? Thank you. :D
 LathaMath
Joined: 1/2/2013
Msg: 14
Getting absolutely nowhere, please review and help
Posted: 1/30/2013 5:00:48 PM
The writeup is fine. The photos are pretty repetitive, one dimensional. Try for variety. Maybe a vacation photo and an outdoor recreation photo, assuming you do go outdoors from time to time. :)
 ouija2013
Joined: 12/9/2012
Msg: 15
Getting absolutely nowhere, please review and help
Posted: 1/30/2013 5:34:57 PM
Makes me insane when ppl say Middle age crazy and they are in their 40s
Like wanting to die of natural causes example being eaten by a Bear
At 4o you are on the slippery slope
so go hit it
 imaginess
Joined: 9/15/2010
Msg: 16
Getting absolutely nowhere, please review and help
Posted: 1/31/2013 6:00:14 AM
I have taken down all of the photos but one for now. I have to work on getting new photos. I dont like taking pictures of myself in general and the ones that I do have are either too old are just plain horrible.

I also took down section regarding favorites. I had read many female profiles where they were found it creepy that they were in someones favorites, and i had wanted to clarify how I use them.

So on the Agenda (not sure when it will be done)
- new pics
- overall rewrite
 ShoestringCatch
Joined: 12/5/2012
Msg: 17
Getting absolutely nowhere, please review and help
Posted: 1/31/2013 6:11:51 AM
omg really!?
relax already.
 ShoestringCatch
Joined: 12/5/2012
Msg: 18
Getting absolutely nowhere, please review and help
Posted: 1/31/2013 6:12:52 AM
previous post was in response to the Idira chick, not you, you're fine.
 imaginess
Joined: 9/15/2010
Msg: 19
Getting absolutely nowhere, please review and help
Posted: 3/8/2013 9:00:06 AM
Finally updated the text in my profile. Is it any better?
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