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Show ALL Forums  > UK forums  > Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?      Home login  
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 TheRe-SownRose
Joined: 2/3/2013
Msg: 13
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Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?Page 1 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
I have "wants to date but nothing serious" and I mean exactly that. To me it doesn't mean I want to go on a couple of dates, shag and that's it. I just want to date and see what happens without things getting too heavy too soon.

Edited to add: OP you are only 24, so having kids may be more of an issue for guys in your age range. When you get to my ancient age it isn't so much of a problem!!
 DAFT_DOG
Joined: 4/23/2011
Msg: 14
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Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?
Posted: 2/17/2013 12:29:13 AM
" Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex? "


Well, the header is a two part question, and the answer to both parts, is, yes, ( the same goes for the women too i would imagine ), and there`s nothing wrong with either of the two issues, some do, some dont, personally, i`d rather wait until i`m in a relationship until i have sex, i`ve waited five yrs, i`m not biting my way up the wall hahahaha, so i can wait a bit longer, :O)
 Nottinghamfellow
Joined: 4/5/2012
Msg: 15
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Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?
Posted: 2/17/2013 1:10:43 AM
I have that on my profile too. I dont have a lot of time to date but like to and whilst i would like something long term I say this as I come with committments on my time. Saying that i do work round those but it seems folk with children in my experience cant. Not wishing to sound like someone begining with C twice recently men in their fifties have claimed their 'children' as an excuse. The first during an intimate encounter, checked a text message (yes I must be that good at it!) and said his son needed a lift ending that. And the other who had asked me out did not turn up then apologised the next day, without prompt, saying he had to visit his son!
 lovepassionx
Joined: 3/12/2012
Msg: 28
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Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?
Posted: 2/17/2013 5:36:07 AM
There's still the old stigma of a woman with kids as being "damaged goods" especially at your age as 90% of guys the same age will have zero interest in you as a long term partner and only be interested in you for sex which is probably why your getting the messages you are. You're going to have to drop your standards quite a lot if you're ever going to meet someone long term.
 Jo van
Joined: 5/23/2009
Msg: 29
Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?
Posted: 2/17/2013 5:39:15 AM
I think that both men and women are basically the same on this, and a whole variety of other issues.
A whole spectrum of different views, across both genders.

I think that some men, and some women, just want sex,
but some also want it so badly,
that a "relationship", is a "price" that they consider, is "worth paying".
 Chuzz16
Joined: 3/26/2011
Msg: 34
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Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?
Posted: 2/17/2013 6:16:35 AM
OP= that's you op...(original poster)
IMO= in my opinion.
 Chuzz16
Joined: 3/26/2011
Msg: 37
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Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?
Posted: 2/17/2013 6:33:36 AM
^^^^
You'll soon get the hang of it if you stick around long enough and I hope you do. Don't give up. It takes a while.:) x

Well said H.C.
vvv
 GeordieColin
Joined: 10/18/2012
Msg: 42
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Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?
Posted: 2/17/2013 9:03:20 AM

He was married and just wanted to play the fields a bit. So I guess I shouldn't judge everyone by his standards but I'm just worried if I do start to like anyone who "wants to date but nothing serious" and it's the same thing.

I keep my kids out of any relationships I have too. I wouldn't introduce them unless I'd been with the guy a year 1st

That would sound like manna from heaven to a guy who is interested in you but not interested at all in your kids.
I have heard number of times before about people who have learnt some way down the line that the person they have fallen for has no interest and will never have any interest in the kids. Who wants to waste a year only to find that out?
 Chuzz16
Joined: 3/26/2011
Msg: 44
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Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?
Posted: 2/17/2013 9:40:59 AM
It's not only about your children's hearts.
When I first split from my husband, my lad was only 8. The last thing I wanted him to see, was his mum bringing home a different man every other month. I was a bit like you too, until I was sure how I felt about someone, and how he felt about me, I kept my child separate from them ( when I say them, there wasn't a different one every other month, but you know what I mean) :))


vvvv,
Well good luck to you, I hope you find him. I haven't yet, but I'm a fussy bint. :)))
 TheRe-SownRose
Joined: 2/3/2013
Msg: 51
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Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?
Posted: 2/17/2013 11:19:37 AM

I think women are becoming like us in that department.


Really? I have just checked and I have not grown a penis as yet. Thankfully.
Better carry on thinking with my brain.
 DAFT_DOG
Joined: 4/23/2011
Msg: 54
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Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?
Posted: 2/17/2013 2:31:34 PM
"has twice insisted on changing the shortened form of wellington boots to 'willies'

^^^ i`d feel damned silly with a pair of willies on my feet ! :O)

vvvvv perish the thought maya ! hahahaha :O)
 AthenaMarina
Joined: 10/29/2012
Msg: 55
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Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?
Posted: 2/18/2013 3:58:09 AM
I feel like I must be doing sonething wrong too.
The guys I (a) AM attracted to (b) may have things in common (c) don't have kids & haven't put down they want them
Those 3 are criteria for me...
Only seem to want to meet & bonk!

HELLO I want an effing DATE!!

As in go out for coffee & chat for e.g. & take it one step at a time.
Not ASSUME we will have a relationship OR a one night stand OR I will be their f@ck buddy!
(there are so many f@ck buddy sites why don't they just go THERE?!)
(And how DO I convey when I say I'm open to casual dating too I mean getting back into dating again as in coffee dates & so on
Rather than just bonka bonka?
Instead I get c@ck shots, guys wanting to f@ck & wanting skype sex.
I LIKE sex but I want a relationship too but first I'd like to actually MEET WITHOUT feeling they are ALREADY pushing me for sex!

Guess I'm just feeling a little frustrated today.

It's NICE to be considered this sexy but what the h@ll happened to a LITTLE romance?
Or even just meet up & get to know each other without this whole f@ck me NOW attitude. Sex is great but on it's own?
Sorry guys it just isn't ENOUGH for me anymore.
 AthenaMarina
Joined: 10/29/2012
Msg: 56
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Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?
Posted: 2/18/2013 8:11:47 AM
Ha ha ha
Yeah I'm 39
I think they are thinking - cougar! Hot sex!
Some of them are cute too...but it's just give me a bit of romance with my sex please, guys!
But yeah, I know, some people would LOVE to have MY problem!!
 TheRe-SownRose
Joined: 2/3/2013
Msg: 59
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Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?
Posted: 2/18/2013 10:43:17 AM

Yep your headline will generate you lots of replies, watch for every weirdo and player to make a beeline for your inbox. Quality of respondent is actually more important than number though, dont miss the gem in gravel.


Have to agree with VC on your headline OP. You are being tongue in cheek but not everyone will get this. The increased traffic may have been down to the random pic you had, even I had to look at wtf it was!!!
 TheRe-SownRose
Joined: 2/3/2013
Msg: 61
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Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?
Posted: 2/18/2013 12:02:37 PM

Just sex for me... relationships are ok but at the mo im happy taking whats on offer


LOL you wh*rebag Object.

At least you're honest, can't imagine you are short on offers anyway ;)
 Chuzz16
Joined: 3/26/2011
Msg: 64
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Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?
Posted: 2/18/2013 1:54:56 PM
Haha V.C, I remember the rediffusion T.V wall box. How funny, we were only talking about them at work the other day.
 algha
Joined: 2/8/2007
Msg: 66
Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?
Posted: 5/14/2013 5:11:09 PM
One would imagine that by the time a woman was 30-35 she just might have realised that men have their brains mainly in their trousers, and not be blinded by hope that the obvious, and experience have not become obscure.

Has anyone looked at the divorce figures, the abused 1 in 4 children, the rapes, the grooming, the psychological and physical abuse. What about the 2 million women physically abused every year, as reported my the police stats????

Has not experience shown you how the loving prince became the live in psychopath, with the constant put downs, till the separation happened? Is life experience counting for nothing???


Ok so let us look worldwide. males have a problem with women, or did I miss a trick? OK, so you are the lucky one are you??? So what the hell are or is anyone on this site for if not groping and hoping for that savior, MR. Right and Bright, smiles and jokes for a time, then the put downs, maybe you like a bit of rough trade?

So how can you find out who is genuine, when you have proved you cannot tell the fake from a fake How can one see into the psycho's mind??? Looking lustfully at his eyes??? Well where has that got anyone to date??? Back in the circus, with the performing fakes of course.

One can tell what a person is like from the way a person eats a meal, or has a drink. Its soooo simple if you use your eyes and not the candle of hope. You can tell his insecurity index, his greed index, how selfish he is, and lots more. But why bother as the drink hits, the warmth starts, the banter, adn flirting starts, and the trip on another SKYLARK is accompanied by the piped music.

So why not have fun for a time, and then realise you wasted your time yet again....... Males in general have a problem with women, remember the stats, they are shocking, and you will never believe it, but I have asked males if they have ever known a rapist, child abuser, violent women beater, not one in thousands I have asked has ever know one either directly or indirectly. Thus the average ,ale has a propensity to be economical with the truth, as in pathological liars, but that is my experience. I treat them for what they are, one earns respect, not demands it, so what is your experience, or is this site full of lucky women, striking the decent males every time????
 try1more
Joined: 12/16/2007
Msg: 67
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Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?
Posted: 5/14/2013 9:48:55 PM
"Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?"

damn it! you mean we can have both?
i thought you had to chose between the one and the other :-)
 daver987654
Joined: 11/2/2011
Msg: 70
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Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?
Posted: 5/15/2013 3:07:59 AM
Mabbot - you're right to be wary, always meet in a public place where there are other people about - that does not mean a car park. I am always happy to give someone my car registration number and mobile number beforehand.

You don't get the ability to edit until your millionth post or so.

Back to the topic - some men on these sites are just here for sex. I am one of those not interested in one night stands, it is not just a female thing, been there, done that and no longer interested.
 TheRe-SownRose
Joined: 2/3/2013
Msg: 73
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Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?
Posted: 5/15/2013 8:00:02 AM

Not sure how not having a pic would guarantee the messages/ approaches were more genuine.


Definitely doesn't, When I tried that approach, I still got the same ridiculous kind of messages.

Also agree with being proactive but be mindful of the kind or guy you like to go for. I always go for wrong uns, cos that's what I like so I've only got myself to blame when I pick out the bad boys.
 TheRe-SownRose
Joined: 2/3/2013
Msg: 77
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Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?
Posted: 5/18/2013 3:29:59 AM

And that if the sex is good.....and the chemistry is there....and the right buttons are pushed...and the right boxes are ticked....then he might just want to have sex with that person for the rest of his life


Er, seems someone was stating the obvious here. Also I don't think this just applies to men!! Having sex with the same person for the rest of time and no one else seems very unappealing!!
 TheRe-SownRose
Joined: 2/3/2013
Msg: 79
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Do men on these sites actually want a relationship or just sex?
Posted: 5/18/2013 6:07:10 AM

It isn't, you just haven't met the right person yet. I was married for 18 years, and trust me, sex with the same person works as long as other boxes are also being ticked


Expect you are right Poll. It's not so much the sex that might be the problem, it's the other boxes that also need to be ticked ;-)
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