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 beabillionaire
Joined: 1/28/2013
Msg: 1
Can you form a relationship after sleeping with on 1st datePage 1 of 1    
I am curious, if you wind up sleeping with the guy on the first night, are you more or less likely to form or want to form a relationship with that person?

It has been my experience that if I wind up sleeping with the women right away, I think all we become is f buddies or a fling, here and there.
Want to see what women think.
 HelenBackAgain
Joined: 1/7/2013
Msg: 2
Can you form a relationship after sleeping with on 1st date
Posted: 3/10/2013 11:57:17 AM
My longest relationship so far began with a first date that ended with sex (no sleeping though ) - but we'd known each other for some months before that first date. So, does it count as "right away"? I'm not sure!
 beabillionaire
Joined: 1/28/2013
Msg: 3
Can you form a relationship after sleeping with on 1st date
Posted: 3/10/2013 12:10:46 PM
Known each other for months prior; does not count!
 GenJayne
Joined: 10/17/2012
Msg: 4
Can you form a relationship after sleeping with on 1st date
Posted: 3/10/2013 12:55:36 PM
Yes, You can form a relationship after sleeping with someone the first time you meet them. I slept with my husband the first time I met him and we were together for over 10 years.
The problems happen when the man has a madonna/whore complex. It always perplexes me how men can say a woman is cheap or undeserving of a "real relationship" if she sleeps with him right away....Hey Mister where was your dyck?
 Pete2205
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 5
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Can you form a relationship after sleeping with on 1st date
Posted: 3/10/2013 1:58:58 PM
Met a girl at a club, had a few drinks and slept with her - We got engaged three months later, married four months after and were married 25 years having raised two gorgeous daughters. Sex and love are two different things but there is as much chance of a relationship lasting after sex on the first night as there is sex after several months of dating.
 NOCLOWNING
Joined: 7/21/2010
Msg: 6
Can you form a relationship after sleeping with on 1st date
Posted: 3/10/2013 2:01:45 PM
Depends on how good the sex was. LOL
I think, you could. I had sex with my ex-boyfriend the night we met. Took 7 yrs to get rid of him.
 Bebedeleau
Joined: 2/25/2013
Msg: 7
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Can you form a relationship after sleeping with on 1st date
Posted: 3/10/2013 3:47:14 PM
Depends.

In my experiences, only one turned into a relationship lasting more than 2 months (it lasted 7 years).

In the cases where I knew/dated the person 3 months or more, 90% turned into relationships of 3 years or more.

It think your question of how 'you' tend to put the person in a 'fling' or 'fwb' category is interesting. It may just be a case of getting what you expect. I think that I tend to think the same way. If I'm sleeping with them "early" it's not for the intent of a relationship other than a fling, a fwb, or it was an 'opps'. 'You' ('we', people in general, perhaps) are defining the relationship based on actions and/or intent.

The question to consider, if you find yourself in this pattern, is are you doing it before or after having sex.
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 8
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Can you form a relationship after sleeping with on 1st date
Posted: 3/10/2013 4:01:03 PM
Lot's of relationships started out with sex right away, that's not the problem. The problem is when people think it's going go be a relationship because they had sex, when it doesn't, they feel used. Sex is sex, building a relationship takes time. It's all about whether or not you are compatible and both want to build something together.
 RyanohRyan
Joined: 11/12/2012
Msg: 9
Can you form a relationship after sleeping with on 1st date
Posted: 3/11/2013 4:18:21 PM
Yup!

She's coming over at 9 tonight.

We first met at the gym, thought she was cute....approx 5 months ago.
I saw her on the dance floor at a local bar a few months later and we danced all the rest of the night.
Next time I saw her in the gym she was very shy and I thought she didn't like me.
Time after, I saw her she opened up and she gave me her number.
First date was at the bar across the street, we had drinks and made fun of the people we see at the gym. We went back to my place and had a ball.

The reason it worked is:

We met by chance, while doing our own thing.
We both like to workout, but are eccentric, both like wine and bud, and jacuzzi, and random weird stuff.

---

Other dates whom I've slept with on the first date didn't work out, and it was because of chemistry, not because of the sex.

It's my belief through patterns and experience that having sex with someone on the first date throws everything into fast forward. You basically know sooner than later if it's going to work out. Kinda makes sense, you do share A LOT when you have sex, not just the actual sex part. Think about it..
 Just___Jim
Joined: 10/21/2012
Msg: 10
Can you form a relationship after sleeping with on 1st date
Posted: 3/11/2013 5:08:43 PM
Message:
I am curious, if you wind up sleeping with the guy on the first night, are you more or less likely to form or want to form a relationship with that person?


Your curious???? How old are you? And now ready to settle down too besides the getting good head and you don't even know her first name? lol

imo, enjoy being single, sow your oats and get back with us after you turn 30 or so if a real relationship is the next thing on your wish list.

There are plenty enough of wimins out there but only few who are all together.

So pick your poison....or let your little head do the talking for now. good luck
 Consensuality
Joined: 7/26/2007
Msg: 11
Can you form a relationship after sleeping with on 1st date
Posted: 3/11/2013 7:26:38 PM

Yes. It depends on the person and connection. Simple as that. If it ends up with sex based on something more than physical attraction there's no reason it wouldn't last.
 spirited-won
Joined: 1/6/2013
Msg: 12
Can you form a relationship after sleeping with on 1st date
Posted: 3/11/2013 7:34:23 PM
You are right...if it happens the first time it becomes nothing more than f buddies. There is no seriousness nor does any commitment come from it....if it does it's quite rare.
 Yesready
Joined: 11/24/2012
Msg: 13
Can you form a relationship after sleeping with on 1st date
Posted: 3/11/2013 8:15:55 PM
I met my husband of 23 years in a bar. It was a coincidence that both of our rides left, but my friend tossed me her car keys as she left with her guy. My place was closer and I was driving. He offered to sleep on the couch. Nice try! We were together every day from then on. Met his family that weekend. Engaged at 5 months.
 Pete2205
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 14
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Can you form a relationship after sleeping with on 1st date
Posted: 3/12/2013 4:45:07 PM
Message 15:
"You are right...if it happens the first time it becomes nothing more than f buddies"
------------------------------
Says who? You spirited? That's your opinion based on your own history or from what your friends have told you of theirs. Several people have said already (Including myself) that first night sex has lead to a long term relationship and that's just in this thread.
------------------------------------------------------------
"There is no seriousness nor does any commitment come from it....if it does it's quite rare."

Again who says its rare? You? Not all first night sex is just about meeting someone with just the intention of getting their pants off for a night of no strings lust.

Granted many of us have gone out with that intent and enjoyed it for what it was but equally many dont go to bed with someone on a first date with a definate pre conceived decision made that in the morning we won't want to see that person again.
Whatever happens on a first date dictates what happens after and. should the relationship not work out then sex is just one factor out of several. You cant say that because a couple have sex on the first date and dont see each other again its because they were not serious or looking for commitment thats a silly statement.

A couple go to bed together on a first date simply because they have enjoyed being with each other and have decided to have sex ...We are allowed to do that :) Neither of us are expected to stress how commited we are or how serious we are about the other person when we are climbing the stairs or lay on the beach - That comes a little futher along the relationship path if all is bobbing along sweet.
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 15
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Can you form a relationship after sleeping with on 1st date
Posted: 3/13/2013 7:57:31 AM

Pete2205
Met a girl at a club, had a few drinks and slept with her - We got engaged three months later, married four months after and were married 25 years having raised two gorgeous daughters. Sex and love are two different things but there is as much chance of a relationship lasting after sex on the first night as there is sex after several months of dating.


Very similar story here, only I was married for 27 years. And I will add that I have never been in a relationship that did not start with sex fairly early on.


NOCLOWNING
Depends on how good the sex was. LOL
I think, you could. I had sex with my ex-boyfriend the night we met. Took 7 yrs to get rid of him.

Excellent point, couldn’t agree more. Bad sex, or at least unexciting sex, will not get you a second date.

Bebedeleau
Depends.

In my experiences, only one turned into a relationship lasting more than 2 months (it lasted 7 years).

In the cases where I knew/dated the person 3 months or more, 90% turned into relationships of 3 years or more.

Three months is a long term relationship (at least to me). I have never dated someone for 3 months without sex, and I’m pretty sure I never will. Life is just too short for that kind of nonsense.

daynadaze
Lot's of relationships started out with sex right away, that's not the problem. The problem is when people think it's going go be a relationship because they had sex, when it doesn't, they feel used. Sex is sex, building a relationship takes time. It's all about whether or not you are compatible and both want to build something together.

+1, very good insight.

RyanohRyan
It's my belief through patterns and experience that having sex with someone on the first date throws everything into fast forward. You basically know sooner than later if it's going to work out. Kinda makes sense, you do share A LOT when you have sex, not just the actual sex part. Think about it..

Another very good post. I am definitely in favor of finding out sooner, rather than later, if we are going to have a relationship. Saves a lot of time, and at my age, time is getting in short supply. (smile)
 Hobbitmann
Joined: 2/18/2013
Msg: 16
Can you form a relationship after sleeping with on 1st date
Posted: 3/14/2013 10:35:53 AM
no you cant cause youll always remember that she ****s people on the first date....women that aren't easy will never **** on the first date...and you don't want an easy girlfriend
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