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Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > how to meet guys in your mid twenties?      Home login  
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 andreabeaumont
Joined: 1/10/2013
Msg: 1
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how to meet guys in your mid twenties?Page 1 of 1    
hello dahlings,

so i recently turned 26 and am trying to do something about the fact that i happen to be perpetually single. my problem isn't that i am ugly or posses a horrid personality- i just don't meet any guys my age who are single. i have a very small circle of friends and they are all girls who also have a small number of friends. so the possibility of meeting a guy through them is non existent at the time. i am also sick of online dating and find the quality of guys on websites to be quite poor; either they are socially awkward, have low self esteem or plain creepy. WHERE can i come across normal smart cute single guys? im only in my mid twenties! it shouldnt be that hard!

so guys here's my question...where can i meet you guys? how can an attractive girl in her mid twenties put herself in a situation where she comes across many single guys?

any responses will be much appreciated!

:)
 tooborednow
Joined: 1/13/2013
Msg: 2
how to meet guys in your mid twenties?
Posted: 3/21/2013 1:11:14 PM
IME when people ask something like this

how to meet guys in your mid twenties?

What they are "really" asking is: "Where can I go to be guaranteed to find someone that is exactly what I want in another person, a perfect fit in every way, without having to go through any of the dating pitfalls, and (most importantly) not have to change my life in any meaningful way whatsoever, nor have to make any difficult choices in changing my life whatsoever."

Do you know why the whole "work/family(life) balance" thing is so huge?
Because it takes just as much focus and work on finding a good mate as it does a good career.
No one can hand you an answer that is going to work for you where you can just go to Lowes and look on aisle 18 and find the right "one."


i am also sick of online dating and find the quality of guys on websites to be quite poor

The same people online are those you will meet offline.
Most people that use online dating don't just simply exist in their homes and do nothing but go on POF.
They have jobs, friends, family, hobbies. You will run into them.

So

.where can i meet you guys? how can an attractive girl in her mid twenties put herself in a situation where she comes across many single guys?

Everywhere.
You have to put in the time and effort in learning how to spot them, talk to them, and interact with them.
You have to put in the time in expanding your own horizons to put yourself out there.
There is no "guys'r'us" store dedicated solely to customizing your dating experience.
There is no centralized planning dating authority.
When you focus on things like school and work, you can't focus your time on this.
When you want to focus on this, then guess what, you have to do the equivalent of going back to school and learning.
 andreabeaumont
Joined: 1/10/2013
Msg: 3
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how to meet guys in your mid twenties?
Posted: 3/21/2013 1:47:22 PM
Okay. Well I'd love to do the equivalent of "going back to school" and learn how to find a guy. Where do I start? How do I go about this?
 SuperFunGuy
Joined: 8/3/2006
Msg: 4
how to meet guys in your mid twenties?
Posted: 3/21/2013 2:18:37 PM
Your young and you have lots of time to find the right guy out there. Go travelling. Really its an awesome way to meet new people. There are all inclusives, singles cruises, join an outdoors co ed group - there's lots of those out there. Yes school is a good thing. Guys do like educated girls. Clubs and bars are boring. Besides you can never talk to anyone in those places. Learn to dance and take dancing lessons. Best luck to you.
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 5
how to meet guys in your mid twenties?
Posted: 3/21/2013 2:20:30 PM
You are a cute girl.

So first decide what type of guy do you want. Urban, outdoor, country, punk, athletic, professional?

Then go where they hang out. After that all you have to do is simple. Can you smile? Can you bat your eyes? Can you smirk?

Good.

They will do the rest.
 Beatlesnerd
Joined: 10/8/2010
Msg: 6
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how to meet guys in your mid twenties?
Posted: 3/21/2013 11:42:12 PM
Bars, bookstores, library, grocery store, anywhere with an sort of human interaction? Don't be afraid to just strike up a random conversation with anyone. Men- possible dating or I bet he has friends. Other female friends are never a bad thing and will open up new activities and new people. Don't be afraid to put yourself out there.
 Truth556
Joined: 12/6/2012
Msg: 7
how to meet guys in your mid twenties?
Posted: 3/22/2013 1:08:26 AM
Dogpark is a great way to meet people.
 LiterateHiker
Joined: 11/30/2012
Msg: 8
how to meet guys in your mid twenties?
Posted: 3/22/2013 8:21:59 AM
When I was your age I met wonderful men through:

Graduate school
Working as a YMCA Program Director
YMCA ski fitness classes
Hiking groups
Downhill skiing groups
Running
Swimming
Parties
Friends
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 9
how to meet guys in your mid twenties?
Posted: 3/22/2013 9:11:42 AM
Since you're on a dating site, do you look at profiles and make any attempt to contact guys whose profile you liked? Or are you sitting back, waiting for guys to do all of the initial leg work? Be pro-active. Doing nothing doesn't get you anywhere. Too many women are waiting for Prince Charming to fall from the sky and land on their lap.
 Stray__Cat
Joined: 7/12/2006
Msg: 10
how to meet guys in your mid twenties?
Posted: 3/22/2013 1:42:00 PM
First off you are very attractive.

So if you are having this problem
maybe guys are leery of approaching you....
maybe thinking you already have a boyfriend.

So just be more open and approachable.
I suggest you go old school on this.
(as it works...cus we are all here)

You see an interesting guy.....
ask directions to someplace.
Even if you know where you are going....ask anyway.

Drop stuff in front of guys.
(You may have to practice that as you don't want to be obvious about it)

Some guy reading a book on a park bench....
Ask him about it.

and guys with dogs...
hey just pet the dog,
and flirt with the owner.

Simply set up situations were you can
interact with guys that may interest you.
That gives you all the cards.
and puts you in control.

Why wait for some guy to approach you?
You see one that is interesting...
I'm sure there is something you could ask
or drop.

:-P
 FairOaksChick
Joined: 11/7/2011
Msg: 11
how to meet guys in your mid twenties?
Posted: 3/22/2013 1:51:21 PM

easiest place to meet somebody is at a bar. Not everybody that goes to a bar is a player or alcoholic. And if you want to avoid players (most of whom will walk up to you), walk up to a guy that doesn't look like a player and talk to him yourself and ask him for his number, or give him yours or something, and keep conversations short the first time you meet somebody like that so they don't think you're the type of girl trying to sleep with them that night. Call him a day or two later, or let him call you, and set up a date. You can get lots of dates that way if you want. And don't get drunk while doing any of this. You could probably try this anywhere since you are a girl, but lots of single guys are at bars actually looking for girls. Safest time to do this would be early in the night- not when everybody is drunk. Meeting people in bookstores or on the street or something takes much more skill and time to pull off. Highest odds will be bars outside of college. If there are like street fairs or a downtown section or something lots of people hang out at on nice weekend days that might work too depending where you live.

Meeting people to date through friends gets very hard as you get older, so while that's the safest way, waiting for something like that can happen could have you waiting around forever.

THIS ^^^!!! It is true. A bar/nightclub early in the evening, and if you like him, ask him to dance with you. Many guys are too shy to approach a woman but will jump at the chance to dance with you even if they feel awkward dancing.
 tnt144
Joined: 2/1/2013
Msg: 12
how to meet guys in your mid twenties?
Posted: 3/22/2013 1:52:43 PM
Adult education classes, college, go back to school little girl - that is the best place to meet - do you remember all the crushes you and others had in school?

Also, any kind of club, class, or group - that like school, the same people meet on a regular basis.

particularly subjects/activities that men like to do, and you don't. Golf lessons and the gold driving range later on are great.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 13
how to meet guys in your mid twenties?
Posted: 3/22/2013 2:05:24 PM
Are you hoping for the guys to approach you? that's probably your Achilles' heel. your profile states your natural curiousity about the world around you, so I'd think you'd be "out and about" at historical events, social events, free concerts in the parks, any other events mentioned in the local free hand-out newspapers.

starting convos would be the next step. when I was your age--hell, still do:)--i met women as attractive as you, started convos, hoped they were single...and none were. or claimed they weren't when I asked...darn pickiness :) lol

so, talk to people about what's going on around you two. that will give you a quick idea of how socially inept they are or are not. then ask where else they've gone, do they recommend a place? usually that's when they slip that they went there with a partner...or alone. play Nancy Drew, you can learn a lot about someone from listening. and if they are taken but take a fancy to you...they may just know a friend, who's probably like them in personality, so you can tell if you'll enjoy their company or not.

good luck, and if you can find a way to clone yourself, please do...lotsa guys looking for someone like you :)
 NonamousDog
Joined: 4/20/2011
Msg: 14
how to meet guys in your mid twenties?
Posted: 3/22/2013 3:07:36 PM
Seems like everybody thinks there are all these smart/cute guys all around you everywhere, OP, and that you can't possibly be having trouble meeting them.

Frankly, OP, you're going to get the same 'advice' here that you got in that other thread, except since this one isn't locked at 21 replies, the posts advising you to smile at/flirt with guys at dog parks/grocery stores/bars/hardware stores/night classes/community groups/volunteer groups/dance classes, etc., etc., etc., will go on for pages and pages.......
 GJBrown
Joined: 9/12/2011
Msg: 15
how to meet guys in your mid twenties?
Posted: 3/22/2013 4:00:57 PM
how to meet guys in your mid twentys?
Be attractive in public!
Flirt!
to quote George Bush "Duh!"
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 16
how to meet guys in your mid twenties?
Posted: 3/23/2013 1:58:21 PM
I'll re-post what I said in the other thread:

"As a female DJ who worked in radio ten years and clubs for 27 years, I have been lucky enough to meet all kinds of people in my life through my work.

Two important things I was forced to do very young because of my occupation were:

1. Getting used to going places alone (eventually I started to prefer this if you can believe it).
2. Approaching and talking to people I didn't know (I now do this without realizing it). It was easier to talk to a crowd or from a studio - but one on one was something else.

Those are the same two things that will keep you from meeting anyone if you aren't comfortable doing them.

So....grab a bunch of local newspapers (the free ones with local art/life/music content are best)
Flip through them and circle what you see that you find interesting and would like to check out. Mark your calendar for the dates. Then...just go. You can't meet as many people when you are with people, and you can't meet them if you don't get out to places. Going solo will enrich your atmosphere, get you to check out what your area offers, and will put you in places where people go that like the same things you do. Once you're there, talk to people at random without any agenda. Make it your business to just learn about new people.

You'd be amazed how many people are very receptive to someone asking them about themselves genuinely in conversation. It works well if you really do want to know whatever it is you're asking.

All of it seems weird, but will be as natural as breathing eventually if you do it long enough. Some you will never talk to again, some will become acquaintances, some friends, some good friends, and you may end up dating a couple."
 ARadicalPunk
Joined: 1/27/2010
Msg: 17
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how to meet guys in your mid twenties?
Posted: 3/23/2013 2:21:40 PM
What is your definition of being socially awkward and creepy? Have you taken a look at your profile, pictures, about me section, and interests to ensure you attracting the right men? Are you taking any initiative in your dating interests? Your grammar, spelling, and syntax show me you aren’t educated, or at the very least haven’t taken a college level literature course, so how do you expect to attract intelligent men? Dating can be very hard if you easily right off social hiccups, mistakes, and simple misconceptions: communication and honesty are really the simple medicines of any would be relationship. Find a common interest and go from there. Now fly my socially awkward butterfly—fly!

Buh-bye now.
 SunshineAngel99
Joined: 10/13/2010
Msg: 18
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how to meet guys in your mid twenties?
Posted: 3/23/2013 4:42:42 PM

Seems like everybody thinks there are all these smart/cute guys all around you everywhere, OP, and that you can't possibly be having trouble meeting them.


My chancse of meeting women and dating jumps exponentially when I am in public. PoF is a good tool, but I don't believe it should be your primary way to arrange dates IMO. What the OP needs to do is go out and about in public more often. To meet people you have to go where people go and there is no way around that. :)
 Albvs
Joined: 2/14/2013
Msg: 19
how to meet guys in your mid twenties?
Posted: 3/23/2013 8:40:29 PM
See if there's something like an outdoor adventure club. These tend to be singles events in disguise, basically. And you meet athletic, smart, good-looking people.


how can an attractive girl in her mid twenties put herself in a situation where she comes across many single guys?

Enlist.
 Jackals38
Joined: 3/20/2013
Msg: 20
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how to meet guys in your mid twenties?
Posted: 3/24/2013 12:21:17 AM
As per the usual, you are being disingenuous with the statement that you are just "looking for single guys your age". In reality, as you state later, you are looking for single guys who are normal, smart, attractive, etc. If there was an actual location where these kind of people (men or women) existed and met on a regular basis, dating sites wouldn't be in business. There isn't some secret club where all the hot, intelligent and charming men/women congregate and proceed to date each other. You have to sift through them all like the rest of us.

Bottom line, there isn't some great shortage of single guys. You simply want a high quality one and they don't happen to sell those at Walmart for your convenience.
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