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 blondegirl_1111
Joined: 2/29/2012
Msg: 1
single mumPage 1 of 1    
I was wo ndering as a single mum who has never taken anyone home to meet my son. Do men really think we are easy or are they just scared to date someone with a kid. I had a fella from this site whom is still on it, he wanted me to meet his family but would never want to come to see mine even though he's the first person I have fully trusted with meeting my son whom did meet him after two weeks. Even though we got on great he ended it as he wanted a break but found out it was due to the fact that he missed his kids while spending time with me and my kid for a half an hour on one occasion. I found out later he said I was clingly and needy, which I find strange as I only text him and when I did it was once every two or three days. Am I a clingly person for texting every two to three days after we last spoke and also he didnt like the fact that after one date he wanted me to meet his brothers and sisters which I declined.
 blondegirl_1111
Joined: 2/29/2012
Msg: 2
single mum
Posted: 3/24/2013 7:47:58 PM
yea but he has two kids of his own so that why I dont think its anything to do with my kid and also he only met my kid for an hour and that was split into two different days, the rest of the time we spent together was on our own
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 3
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single mum
Posted: 3/25/2013 4:16:44 AM
First, you are generalizing from this single, short experience, into all of male kind. This speaks more to your frustration with that one guy, than to logic.

Next, though I only have your version of things to go on, I also see a number of hints which might explain the particular things you describe. You say, that he said you were clingy; and you think that being "clingy" should only have to do with sending too many text messages, or otherwise taking up too much of someone else's time. But time is only one of the lesser hints that someone is "clingy." A much more important one, is that a person is filled with pre-conceived ideas about exactly how a relationship "should" progress, and uses the time spent with the other person to push them to follow the "script."

This part is confusing to me:

" he didnt like the fact that after one date he wanted me to meet his brothers and sisters which I declined."

HE didn't like the fact that HE wanted you to meet his brothers?

If what you meant to say was that he claimed you were clingy, because you refused to rush into meeting his family after one date...then I would be more likely to conclude that he was calling YOU clingy, because HE was clingy. That sort of thing happens a lot with these darn humans.
 gunslingerpedro
Joined: 3/28/2011
Msg: 4
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single mum
Posted: 3/25/2013 2:25:03 PM
Men are not SCARED to date a single mom, they just don't want to. Its a preference.
 blondegirl_1111
Joined: 2/29/2012
Msg: 5
single mum
Posted: 3/26/2013 6:43:25 PM
ok so scared might not be the right word, but he did leave it and then two days ago message me sayin that he didnt go back to his ex but rather that he thought that the text/calls where being too serious after him saying im clingly and also that he wasnt happy i didnt meet his family. No offense but I always put meeting family was it being serious or is that just me that have relationships and meeting family was it being serious.
 CharminC
Joined: 2/19/2011
Msg: 6
single mum
Posted: 3/26/2013 8:03:21 PM
Do men really think we are easy or are they just scared to date someone with a kid.
- Depends on who you are asking. Not all men think the same so the answer to your question will be different between each one. As the other posters above have mentioned, usually it is just preference.

he wanted me to meet his family but would never want to come to see mine even though he's the first person I have fully trusted with meeting my son whom did meet him after two weeks.
- A relationship should always be give and take. If he wants to meet your family, you should be able to meet his unless there is a valid reason not to.
Two weeks is rather too soon to introduce kids...no? Get to know the guy a bit better first.

Even though we got on great he ended it as he wanted a break but found out it was due to the fact that he missed his kids while spending time with me and my kid for a half an hour on one occasion.
- Ahhh.. he has kids too? All the more reason you should get to know the guy better. Make sure he isn't the babymaking. absent dad, no pay type.


I found out later he said I was clingly and needy, which I find strange as I only text him and when I did it was once every two or three days. Am I a clingly person for texting every two to three days after we last spoke
- What do you think?!!! You've barely texted and yet he's saying you are texting too much. He seriously needs to come up with something better to complain about in order to ditch you.

he didnt like the fact that after one date he wanted me to meet his brothers and sisters which I declined.
- Tough nuts. He can run to mom and cry. You have full rights to decide what you are and are not comfortable with especially when you have just begun to date. I can see him complaining if it's months down the road.

Seriously girl, don't let a man make you question yourself. All that does is create low self esteem. You do have the right ideas so stay with it. You have a child take care of so get your wits up and keep at it.
 chipcanplay
Joined: 1/10/2013
Msg: 7
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single mum
Posted: 3/31/2013 10:28:28 PM
I think when one finnds the right person noting matters but working things out an working toward make a good loving family ... so just keep looking
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