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 e4shan1968
Joined: 10/8/2012
Msg: 1
What does this meanPage 1 of 2    (1, 2)
This is my first time on a dating site and am confused maybe someone can explain this to me. I have guys that will be chatting with you on POF then all of a sudden they stop and then don't answer? Why can't they be honest and just say not interested?
 Jackals38
Joined: 3/20/2013
Msg: 2
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History
What does this mean
Posted: 3/24/2013 9:39:07 PM
This topic is new and exciting.
 e4shan1968
Joined: 10/8/2012
Msg: 3
What does this mean
Posted: 3/24/2013 9:40:31 PM
why is this topic new and exciting?
 wolftxusa66
Joined: 3/13/2013
Msg: 4
What does this mean
Posted: 3/24/2013 9:41:27 PM
Before this thread gets deleted for redundancy, let me brief you that the common consensus here is that no reply or a fizzled conversation means no interest. Don't take it personally, just keep looking. Try to get on a date to meet them instead of talking too long.

Edit: He was joking, it's been done to death...

vvv Forget the flirt option. Write a few lines if interested, but put a few sentences together. Men like that, too. And read other forum threads to learn the ropes. Enjoy...
 e4shan1968
Joined: 10/8/2012
Msg: 5
What does this mean
Posted: 3/24/2013 9:44:19 PM
Thanks pretty new to this. thank you. Now little question here is it better to wait for a guy to show interest or is it ok so a women to give a wink firs? just asking from a man's perspective
 Jackals38
Joined: 3/20/2013
Msg: 6
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What does this mean
Posted: 3/24/2013 10:01:24 PM
Ok, do the following:

1) Click on Show All Forums.
2) In the empty white box next to "Thread Title" type in "disappear".
3) Spend the next week and a half looking through those threads.
4) If that doesn't satisfy you, try "vanish".
 LiterateHiker
Joined: 11/30/2012
Msg: 7
What does this mean
Posted: 3/24/2013 10:03:00 PM
Of course it's fine for women to show interest. The vast majority of men who receive initial emails from you will responded positively, based on my experience.
 wolftxusa66
Joined: 3/13/2013
Msg: 8
What does this mean
Posted: 3/24/2013 10:12:04 PM
Oh, and go easy on your mail restrictions. The only males left to contact you in your vicinity are the mailman and the neighbor's dog. Widen the age range - you can always decline.
 ARadicalPunk
Joined: 1/27/2010
Msg: 9
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What does this mean
Posted: 3/24/2013 10:29:12 PM
New to online dating? Oh you're in for a treat.
 Eric_Summit
Joined: 11/3/2009
Msg: 10
What does this mean
Posted: 3/24/2013 10:29:41 PM
e4shan1968, the classic POF fadeaway will be repeated countless times in 2013 and in the future.
There will be men whom are interested in you, yet for whatever reason, you will stop chatting with them.
It is the nature of internet dating...things get pushed to the side in favor of other things and people that interest you.
 Talllkonnly
Joined: 1/16/2013
Msg: 11
What does this mean
Posted: 3/24/2013 11:15:33 PM
@ Wolftxusa66, "With all your restrictions the only ones left to e-mail you is the mailman and the neighbor's dog." I laughed out loud with that one. To the Op. As attractive as you are, the reason you should have a wider age restriction is that your top age of 49 are men that can easily e-mail women in their late 30's that would be interested in dating them. I would suggest taking off age restrictions so a guy you may be interested in who is in their 50's can e-mail you as that guy may be "the one."
 monocryl
Joined: 3/4/2013
Msg: 12
What does this mean
Posted: 3/25/2013 6:18:17 PM

is it better to wait for a guy to show interest or is it ok so a women to give a wink firs?


With only one exception, all my dates resulted from messages I'd sent myself. You may have better luck attracting guys you like, but I wouldn't count on it.

Good luck with your search, and don't lose heart. You come across as very honest and earnest.
 Quasimodo11543
Joined: 7/21/2010
Msg: 13
What does this mean
Posted: 3/25/2013 7:48:33 PM
Threads don't get deleted for redundancy when it gets numerous comments. So, instead of pointing out that someone has just asked a redundant question, then even going so far as to give a response to it. Ignore it instead. Just a thought.

There is no definitive answer as to why people pull disappearing acts after you start talking to them. That's just the way things work here more often than not. Re bait your hook, start fishing again or you'll drive yourself nuts. Accept the things you can not change.
 EyesRgreen_62
Joined: 3/12/2013
Msg: 14
What does this mean
Posted: 3/25/2013 7:59:00 PM

New to online dating? Oh you're in for a treat.

*snort* .... ^what he said.

OP, for some people there is just too much to handle ... too many pretty shiny things :)
I for one have a hard time juggling more than a few conversations at a time ... I tend to prefer to focus. When you do that though, you risk missing out on a lot of wonderful people. It's really a catch22 ... in an odd sort of way. Good luck.
 DietFree
Joined: 11/1/2012
Msg: 15
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What does this mean
Posted: 3/25/2013 8:05:31 PM

I have guys that will be chatting with you on POF then all of a sudden they stop and then don't answer?


Sometimes they stop suddenly because their wife/girlfriend just entered the room.
 Feather21
Joined: 6/6/2008
Msg: 16
What does this mean
Posted: 3/25/2013 10:28:30 PM
This is very true, I met someone on here that I did like.

Found out later he had a gf the whole time he was writing me. Sweet!
 brinaalina
Joined: 10/26/2011
Msg: 17
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What does this mean
Posted: 3/26/2013 1:41:45 AM
Because when we say that there are so many people that get weird and angry that you want to stop talking to them.
So just not responding is easier.
And this is online dating. Get used to it lol.

Seriously.
And they stopped responding because they either
1)found someone more interesting to talk to,
2)already have a gf and she probably found his profile, oe
3) he died.


Hint*
(It's probably not number three)
 KSCFish33
Joined: 8/26/2010
Msg: 18
What does this mean
Posted: 3/26/2013 6:48:39 AM
Shan - That is, sadly, how things are online. I respect a woman MUCH more for saying she's not interested vs. just ignoring me, but I suppose that's too much trouble. On top of that you do get whackos who go nutters when you reject them. Don't take it personally... IMO anyone lacking the &%$#s to be honest with you isn't worth your time anyway :)
 msright78
Joined: 12/11/2012
Msg: 19
What does this mean
Posted: 3/26/2013 9:38:20 AM
It happens all the time on here.

U've been talking to someone for a while and all of a sudden they no longer reply back to ur emails.

Why? Cuz they found someone else.

I wouldn't take it personally just move on to someone else. Just think of it as their loss not urs!!! It'll save u all the unnecessary headaches
 Stubidooo
Joined: 12/30/2012
Msg: 20
What does this mean
Posted: 3/26/2013 9:48:07 AM
Women do the same thing. People can lose interest and disappear at ANY point in the process. Welcome to online dating.
 lostcausein
Joined: 3/16/2013
Msg: 21
What does this mean
Posted: 3/26/2013 9:51:19 AM
Sometimes they stop suddenly because their wife/girlfriend just entered the room.


Yes OR they finished and are busy cleaning up with kleenex.
 JSBL1967
Joined: 2/22/2013
Msg: 22
What does this mean
Posted: 3/26/2013 1:07:15 PM
Could be a bunch of reasons, maybe found somebody else, maybe doesn't want to hurt your feelings, I have chatted with a few women on here and they just stop for some reason...I try not to over think it too much. Good manners would help a bit, but what can you do.

Good luck
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 23
What does this mean
Posted: 3/26/2013 1:26:04 PM
Men and women do this - if someone loses interest it's common for them to stop responding. They can be blunt about it, or not. It's the same deal.

For the most part I believe that people do start off stating lack of interest, and then they get backlash, insulted, or someone who tries to fix/change themselves to stay in the running, or someone who ignores that you're not interested and continues to message. Some people can't deal with a person not being interested for some reason. Eventually they learn to just stop responding when they're no longer interested because it causes the least amount of grief.

Usually the more you talk to (assuming you can find more than one you have interest in) the less you notice the ones who drop out of rotation. Chalk it up.
 Crsdan57
Joined: 7/25/2012
Msg: 24
What does this mean
Posted: 3/26/2013 2:48:22 PM
Can be a few different reasons from losing interest to their wife walked in on them and they had to terminate quickly. Bottom line is don't waste the time or energy trying to figure it out. Move on to someone that is interested and available.
 charliesmom21
Joined: 6/22/2009
Msg: 25
What does this mean
Posted: 3/26/2013 7:17:23 PM
Welcome to the cesspool. Where there is always someone with something mean to say, games, yes lots of games to play and as a newbie.. all the creeps who everyone else already rejected will be filling your mailbox. Lets not forget the ones out to get some money for you.. they send really sweet emails enough to give you diabetes just reading them. Yes, welcome newbie!!
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