Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Girl  > What does girls want      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Siyano
Joined: 4/27/2013
Msg: 1
What does girls wantPage 1 of 1    
After being several time on dating site I was wondering, what does girl want from a "simple" guy to be answered his message, I know it may sound as a very simple questions but sometime I wonder, I got through the trouble of having a very well done profile and trying to tinker message the best of I can but I barely get any kind of response. I don't think I am ugly, I may have typical "man" taste such as video games and action movies. I always want to know why do I get rejected without any kind of feedback? Do girl on dating site don't want to date? A lot of the few conversation I could have stroke most did not wanted to meet. I often say that I may look bland on a sheet of paper that is my profile but I may be a person that is better to sell "itself" in person.
I would love that sometimes girls give slightly more chance to "simple" guys that may look bland canvas
 LiterateHiker
Joined: 11/30/2012
Msg: 2
What does girls want
Posted: 5/12/2013 8:07:46 PM
Please take your profile to Profile Review. Nice people will help you there. Watch the video at the bottom of the "Edit Profile" section, then rewrite everything.

The best profiles show personality and are upbeat and well-written with a touch of humor. Internet dating is a visual and written medium. No text speak. Correct spelling and grammar are important to women. Lose the exclamation marks. Your profile should answer these questions:

1. Who are you? What makes you unique? What can you bring to a relationship?
2. What do you want in a relationship?
3. What kind of woman do you want? Use descriptive words.

No offense, but you would benefit from using a product like Crest Whitestrips to brighten your smile.
 QT3.18
Joined: 2/1/2013
Msg: 3
What does girls want
Posted: 5/12/2013 8:15:05 PM
Bonsoir OP!!

You have to recognize that not all people are going to be interested simply because you send them a message. And if you are using g.oogle translate to translate your messages to anglophone girls, it is not translating properly.

Don't take it personally. Just keep trying and eventually, you will find one that finds you equally as suitable. But you have to get a thick skin on a dating site, and not take the rejection personally.

Bonne chance!
 Siyano
Joined: 4/27/2013
Msg: 4
What does girls want
Posted: 5/12/2013 8:16:32 PM
Well I know that my profile from PoF may not be a good representative of the well written I have on some other.
May sound weird but I never really know what kind of answer you can use on "What do you want in a relationship?" it may sound typical and basic but, I want love, respect and everything a relationship can have so I don't really see
As for woman, one part I don't want to sound too picky and on the other part I don't want to sound not picky, so I don't know how I can describe the kind of person I want. For me it all about the way I feel when I meet a person, even tho you may be the best on paper, nothing beat a meet up

Thank for you advice anyway
 jessebunnies
Joined: 2/18/2013
Msg: 5
view profile
History
What does girls want
Posted: 5/12/2013 8:17:25 PM

because it bring other brain


What? Sounds like a zombie wrote this.


I am quite marginal, I often want things to work the way I want them to work.


If your serious then you should take your profile to the profile review thread and get some help. It's in desperate need of life!
 Eric_Summit
Joined: 11/3/2009
Msg: 6
What does girls want
Posted: 5/12/2013 10:50:04 PM
You will experience greater luck messaging French-speaking women only.
The translator you are using is creating very peculiar-sounding messages.
 cesska
Joined: 11/7/2011
Msg: 7
view profile
History
What does girls want
Posted: 5/12/2013 11:29:35 PM
women want sweet, kind men
 import_from_UK
Joined: 3/20/2013
Msg: 8
What does girls want
Posted: 5/13/2013 3:07:16 AM

After being several time on dating site I was wondering, what does girl want from a "simple" guy to be answered his message, I know it may sound as a very simple questions but sometime I wonder


It's very simple. Women will answer the messages from men who they consider attractive.

Let me ask you something - If a woman you have no attraction to at all, sent you a message, what words could she use in that, to make you find her attractive and want to reply? Chances are, there is nothing she could say. We are each attracted to who we are attracted to and there's nothing we can do to control it and no words you can use in a message to change it.


I always want to know why do I get rejected without any kind of feedback?


Several reasons.

First, no one owes you feedback.
Secondly, it's not in our interests to message men we aren't interested in to provide them with the reasons - plus it would open us up to all levels of abuse from people who don't take it well.
Then there's the fact that you can't change someone's level of attraction to you so the feed back wouldn't provide you with any information you can use to your benefit.
And finally, do you have any idea how long that would take? Sending out messages to people just to say we aren't wired in a way which finds you attractive takes away from focusing on replying to messages from those we are interested in. Who would dedicate their time to doing that?
It strikes me as you are the type who would respond again asking for more and more clarification anyway and so that 5 second 'thanks but no thanks' ends up and being an endless exchange in which we eventually block you so we haven't got this toddler pulling at our pant legs, demanding attention and answers constantly.


A lot of the few conversation I could have stroke most did not wanted to meet.


Which is the way it goes for everyone. Just because someone waves from across the room, we are not obligated to walk over and have a complete conversation with them.


I often say that I may look bland on a sheet of paper that is my profile but I may be a person that is better to sell "itself" in person.


And you may be right. So stop complaining about your bland sheet of paper and demanding a response to it and get out in person and sell yourself, if that's your view.


I would love that sometimes girls give slightly more chance to "simple" guys that may look bland canvas


But again, that's not how attraction works.

I'm sure the blonde girls would love more chances from the men who like brunettes.
I'm sure the brunette girls would love more chances from the men who like blondes.
I'm sure the tall girls would love more chances from the men who like short women.
I'm sure the short women would love more chances from the men who like tall women.

I am also sure no girl wants more chances from all men, just the certain ones they are attracted to, just as you don't really want more chances for the entire female user base, just the ones you find attractive.

Dating is a unique relationship which hold the potential of a sexual relationship with a limited few with whom a connection is found. Attraction to one another matters. If a woman isn't attracted to you, it doesn't matter if you are a nice guy or anything else. All you will be at best is a friend, without mutual attraction. Most of us here, aren't looking for a friend. We are looking for a potential mate. We have no intention of gathering a crowd of friends on route.

All you can do is keep messaging those you find attractive in the hope the feeling is mutual. Accept it's not personal when you don't get a reply. Focus on the ones who do answer in order to determine if the compatibility is deeper than an appreciation of how the other one looks.
 Pinky127
Joined: 1/7/2012
Msg: 9
What does girls want
Posted: 5/13/2013 3:24:38 AM
Op,this really is very "simple" and you're the one and only guy that has ever asked this Q.............
*eyeroll*

Girls respond to guys whose Profile content appeals to them and who is also pleasing on the eye,ie: there's some attraction to them.
So,that is really all there is to it!
Capeesh?
 Aristotle_Amadopolis
Joined: 12/8/2011
Msg: 10
What does girls want
Posted: 5/13/2013 5:42:48 AM

What does girls want

The same thing that guys want.

To meet someone that shares the same level of attraction.
 ManOfAdventure28
Joined: 3/8/2013
Msg: 11
view profile
History
What does girls want
Posted: 5/13/2013 5:48:34 AM
What does a girl want from a "simple" guy?

1. That he doesn't drool on her
2. That he closes his mouth whilst he stares at her
3. That he doesn't actually stare at her.
4. That he doesn't try to hump her leg.
5. That he's toilet trained
 Bluegold007
Joined: 4/22/2013
Msg: 12
What does girls want
Posted: 5/13/2013 6:59:59 AM
Women on here only go for 9's and 10's.
 Siyano
Joined: 4/27/2013
Msg: 13
What does girls want
Posted: 5/13/2013 7:15:24 AM
well I can understand not being the type of certain girl but receiving less than 1% response doesn't really make sense
I know that dating is "special" but I am asking to meet up because to sell myself way better than off word on a dating site
In general lets say a person to replay need 100 point
Here few point I have seen you can lose
-Most men start with a lower replay rate because of some just ask for sex and most girl lower all guys points because they all think they want sex
-If don't look particularly "handsome"
-If you look bland and boring
-If you have too much man typical likes, such has action movies and video game (never understood this one)
-if you are a gamer (yes the stereotype is still strong)
-if you look needy or desperate (by asking to generally what women you want)
-if you seem just to be the "good guy"
-if you don't have enough outdoor/sport activities
-if you don't have enough cultural activities (theater, painting, exposition)

Can we pass the too "official" mean of dating and just start with a meet up, feel like girl don't want to date because it so serious, I'm just asking to meet you to show myself, we will see there if we have common interest (you can't judge a person by its profile!)
 Aristotle_Amadopolis
Joined: 12/8/2011
Msg: 14
What does girls want
Posted: 5/13/2013 7:19:37 AM

well I can understand not being the type of certain girl but receiving less than 1% response doesn't really make sense

Why doesn't it make sense?

Where did you learn that more than 1% of the women on POF would respond to anyone?




Can we pass the too "official" mean of dating and just start with a meet up, feel like girl don't want to date because it so serious, I'm just asking to meet you to show myself, we will see there if we have common interest (you can't judge a person by its profile!)

Actually you can judge a person enough to decide if you want to meet them or not.
 Bearfish13
Joined: 11/3/2012
Msg: 15
What does girls want
Posted: 5/13/2013 7:22:28 AM
This is how online works compared to meeting people In person, online you add the step of messaging and if that goes well then you get the date, if not then not.
 import_from_UK
Joined: 3/20/2013
Msg: 16
What does girls want
Posted: 5/13/2013 10:58:11 AM

I know that dating is "special" but I am asking to meet up because to sell myself way better than off word on a dating site


You don't really expect people to meet up with all those they can't see a connection with, just to confirm it.

There are 1000's of users in my area - do you expect me to meet up with them all just in case? Do you expect them all to meet up with me? This isn't meant to be a full time occupation.


Can we pass the too "official" mean of dating and just start with a meet up, feel like girl don't want to date because it so serious, I'm just asking to meet you to show myself, we will see there if we have common interest (you can't judge a person by its profile!)


You're not understanding. People don't want to meet up with lots of people. No one owes you a chance to show yourself. Damn right you can and have to judge a person by their profile otherwise you've got no way of reducing the gross number.

It's impossible to meet everyone so we have to reduce the numbers by not meeting up with those we aren't interesting in meeting up with.
 Siyano
Joined: 4/27/2013
Msg: 17
What does girls want
Posted: 5/13/2013 1:27:26 PM

There are 1000's of users in my area - do you expect me to meet up with them all just in case? Do you expect them all to meet up with me? This isn't meant to be a full time occupation.


I think it obvious that I am not saying meet all thousand of them, but maybe give chance to more than 1%?


You're not understanding. People don't want to meet up with lots of people. No one owes you a chance to show yourself. Damn right you can and have to judge a person by their profile otherwise you've got no way of reducing the gross number.
Well then if you judge someone by just his writing skill, up to you, you may skip truly great match just for that, some people may lack writing skill but may offer other better skill to show.
After all I know I am not saying that give all message a chance, but be open minded and slightly open you "pickyness" maybe?
Anyway that my opinion

ps: meeting and going out more will give higher chance of finding someone, been that for a long time even before dating site was invented. Dating site is only a easier barrier to break than going to talk in person directly on the first go
 import_from_UK
Joined: 3/20/2013
Msg: 18
What does girls want
Posted: 5/13/2013 3:17:58 PM

Well then if you judge someone by just his writing skill, up to you, you may skip truly great match just for that, some people may lack writing skill but may offer other better skill to show.
After all I know I am not saying that give all message a chance, but be open minded and slightly open you "pickyness" maybe?


I haven't said I judge someone by their writing skill, you just made that up. Just like you made up the 1% reply rate.

We each have a number of criteria we use in determining if a message sender has the potential of being a match. You and I both included. You might not think you have, but you do.

It might be as simple and obvious as not dating someone with a tendency for violence but it's still a criteria.

Why would you presume I or anyone else is basing rejection on purely one element?

Why do you feel the need to be insulting and accuse others of pickiness when you have no idea what criteria they are using and why it's important to them?

Of course meeting people in person and going out more in order to increase the volume of people you are interacting with, makes a difference. On line dating is just one more tool. Just another place (albetit a virtual one) where you might cross paths with a potential mate. You don't think your comments are a revelation to anyone, do you?
 JakeT513
Joined: 2/2/2013
Msg: 19
What does girls want
Posted: 5/13/2013 9:32:22 PM
The thing is, you want to be as genuinely real as you can, because there are so so many many women out there. There's no point in trying to be a certain way to please the majority of women because after all, you only want one, right? You want the one who likes you for you, not because you hang with Leonardo, or that guy who played in Fargo...
Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Girl  > What does girls want