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Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > 1st date and she wants "IT" and your not feeling her...do you do her      Home login  
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 ripcurl7772
Joined: 9/14/2012
Msg: 1
1st date and she wants "IT" and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
1st date and she wants "IT" and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway? Do you go for it because your attracted physically and the last few dates didn't involve anything physical..you have not "sex buddy" to call and havn't had sex in over a month. Do you do it anyway? Even if its misleading to her? In other words you didn't ask her for sex but she is asking to go home with you an hour after meeting her...
 Lexti
Joined: 3/14/2013
Msg: 2
1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 6/28/2013 6:43:19 PM
Don't mislead. If you're going to do it, make sure she understands that there should be no preconceived expectations. If she still wants to, then you don't have to feel guilty because you were upfront and honest about it. Are you on the first date now??
 gcdeb
Joined: 4/25/2011
Msg: 3
1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 6/28/2013 6:45:36 PM
How would you be misleading her? Have you told her you want to see her again but have no intention of doing so? If so, that would not be fair.
 Eric_Summit
Joined: 11/3/2009
Msg: 4
1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 6/28/2013 6:54:53 PM
Ensure you are not deceiving or using trickery with her.
Karma can be brutal when it comes to bite you later...
 Holly63
Joined: 2/4/2011
Msg: 5
1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 6/28/2013 7:04:14 PM

Do you do it anyway? Even if its misleading to her?

In my own opinion, no. Don't you have more self respect than sink yourself into just anyone who gives you "that" smile and consider her nothing more than a piece of meat? She might really like you but don't deceive her then chuck her out the next morning with "wham bam thankyou maám".

Sorry to sound harsh but you're looking for long term right? Keep yourself clean and concentrate on the ladies who respect themselves.
 ripcurl7772
Joined: 9/14/2012
Msg: 6
1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 6/28/2013 7:06:24 PM
Well I didn't say anything to her about seeing her again or not seeting her again. After an hour of talking she wanted the parking lot, then when I kissed her goodbye she asks about what we are doing next. I think if It hadn't been so long for me I don't allow it but it was long ...terribly painfully long lol seriously. Anythin that hits 3 weeks becomes worse then a headache or back ache for me. ANyways she hated my job, and told me 4 times in person in the one hour. I have a simple job that's boring, difficult but not exciting or high paying and she is making good money. So I think that's why I don't like that. I would never tell someone I don't like their career.
 Space_Weaver
Joined: 11/27/2012
Msg: 7
1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 6/28/2013 7:13:04 PM
She wants Informational Technology with sex. You can show her on the computer all the porn sites and introduce her to 'Bob'. Battery Operated Boyfriend. Sounds like she wanted a computer tech rather than a boyfriend:)
 ladymercury
Joined: 5/25/2011
Msg: 8
1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 6/28/2013 7:20:28 PM
I'm a bit lost to say the least. Just let it work itself out would be my best guess. It'll happen or it won't.
 MutedEnthusiasm
Joined: 7/8/2011
Msg: 9
1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 6/29/2013 12:29:30 AM
If she just wants sex, then you’d be soiling your respectable self with the shameful ho.

Unless she really likes you. Then you would be disrespecting her, you shameful ho.

But if she really likes you and says she just wants to get laid (which women can do any ole time they want, but they never want to, not if they’re respectable)… then she’s lying and you are a shameful ho for believing her. Or not believing her, as the case may be.

May you both be well and happy...
 no_1_bby
Joined: 5/3/2006
Msg: 10
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1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 6/29/2013 6:01:51 AM
Why on Earth would you have sex with someone you don't want to have sex with? That just does not make any sense to me logically.
 TooShadows
Joined: 9/26/2008
Msg: 11
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1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 6/29/2013 6:37:15 AM
It's never happened,probably only because I was always in the mood. But you have to make up your own mind. If you're not attracted or just not in the mood then don't.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 12
1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 6/30/2013 3:45:02 PM
well shoot, if you're feeling like you're misleading her, then you're likely misleading her. We can only be responsible for our own thoughts, not for the thoughts of others, but we also know when we're selling something we don't plan on relinquishing.

be honest, she's an adult and thus can handle it. If she isn't worried about "What People Will Think" about her willingness for first date sex, then she may shock you about wanting to use you for sex, too. Treat her with the respect an adult deserves, give her the opportunity to make a logical, adult decision by giving her the information she needs to do so. If she wants to take responsibility for her actions, give her what she needs to do that (no, I mean information, silly) and enjoy the urge to merge.

but, to use her for something you haven't had in a long while...hey, that's your fault, not her's. so its your responsibility, not her's. maybe she put down your job b/c she felt rejected for sex in turn, who knows. maybe you ducked a bullet b/c she's a whackjob. moot point now.
 TheLiberator
Joined: 1/22/2012
Msg: 13
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1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 7/1/2013 12:11:31 PM

Why on Earth would you have sex with someone you don't want to have sex with? That just does not make any sense to me logically.


I think Muddy Waters said it best. "Spelled Emmmm... Aaaaaa(child)... Ennn".

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w5IOou6qN1o
 Eric_Summit
Joined: 11/3/2009
Msg: 14
Vanished...
Posted: 7/1/2013 12:21:17 PM
POOF!

The OP has left the building.
That happens frequently these days, it seems.
 LoneScottishBoy
Joined: 2/13/2012
Msg: 15
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History
Vanished...
Posted: 7/1/2013 12:44:27 PM
^^^^People seem to do that when they dont get the answer they wanted...:P
 The_Whole_of_the_Moon
Joined: 11/25/2012
Msg: 16
1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 7/1/2013 1:29:21 PM
Considering the questions you asked are you sure you're telling us about a real woman and not a wet dream.
 nubeginnings64
Joined: 4/8/2012
Msg: 17
1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 7/3/2013 6:57:45 PM
It's just sex. So long as neither made empty promises to mislead or morally objects & your mutually attracted, then why not.
 roughriders35
Joined: 6/13/2013
Msg: 18
1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 7/4/2013 1:15:07 PM
typical man.

screw a woman because you get the chance instead of doing the right thing.
 nubeginnings64
Joined: 4/8/2012
Msg: 19
1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 7/5/2013 8:04:22 AM

typical man.

screw a woman because you get the chance instead of doing the right thing.


Kind of mid-evil to believe women are in need of having their virtue rescued from themselves in this day & age. It's naive to think that women don't enjoy sex, just for the sake of getting off & or that an emotional attachment is necessary for them to do so.

I know the OP is gone, but I wouldn't be so quick to assume a man was taking advantage if she's coming onto him for sex on a 1st meet or date, just because he's a man.
 dkbmom
Joined: 7/2/2013
Msg: 20
1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 7/5/2013 10:13:24 AM
Both adults, as long as everyone knows up front it's just sex, that's fine.
 pandusvenator
Joined: 5/6/2013
Msg: 21
1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 7/6/2013 11:12:43 AM
I don't get the misleading part. I think that she is probably pretty socially savy. A socially clueless woman would be too uncertain of herself to ask that of a man.
Should she be worried about you and your feelings?
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 22
1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 7/11/2013 1:35:16 AM

Do you do it anyway? Even if its misleading to her? In other words you didn't ask her for sex but she is asking to go home with you an hour after meeting her...

Porking her in that situation is NOT leading her on. If she asks to go home with you an hour after meeting her, she's wanting to do it. You're not leading her on by complying. Having sex by itself, notably when she's pushing the situation, does not mean you want to start Dating her.

If I met up with a gal for a couple drinks who internally was thinking she wasn't into me... and I asked her to come home with me after an hour, and she agreed since she was in that 'mood', and we porked... would I cry foul for her "leading me on" that we'd be in a Relationship? I spent an hour with her to bring her home to pork! I could not cry foul. I could be disappointed that she wasn't into me enough to keep seeing me -- but that's about it.

Quick, off-the-bat sex doesn't mean "seeing each other" is implied. If you went on a few dates with her, and were about to break things off with her when she says she wants to go home with you (wink wink), then Maybe you could be leading her on since you already have something going and would be upping the ante. Then that would be arguable.

Of course, having sex could be a reason to tilt things into the Not Interested or Interested column. Having sex doesn't mean you're obligated to keep seeing them. Many times girls will want to have sex with you to "keep" you. That's playing games. Just don't lead girls on that you're All about them when you're not in order to get action (that's leading them on).
 you_needme
Joined: 6/30/2013
Msg: 23
1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 7/11/2013 3:19:07 PM

1st date and she wants "IT" and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?

No.
Because in all likelihood she may very well feel entitled to being clingy, feeling hurt, acting like a victim, and seek retribution or create drama in my life.


Do you go for it because your attracted physically and the last few dates didn't involve anything physical..you have not "sex buddy" to call and havn't had sex in over a month

No. My genitals don't run the show.


In other words you didn't ask her for sex but she is asking to go home with you an hour after meeting her...

I've dated several women who sucked at communication.
Talkative online, they show up on dates, sit there as meek as a mouse, answer yes or no and nothing more, and then when the date wraps up and I walk them to their car they all of a sudden turn into touchy feely flirty let's violate his personal space women that soooooo want to see me again. They don't really want to have sex, they simply don't want the date to be a failure, they simply don't want to be rejected, they just want to be liked.
They are simply acting in a way they think they know how you will respond to in order to get a positive value judgment from you.

If you aren't feeling her, it's coming across indirectly. Some people simply react to that in their own indirect way in order to either get you to change your mind and send out more positive signals/feedback, or to try and get back a sense of "power" or "control" where they have the potential option of rejecting you rather than accepting your obvious "not feeling her" rejection of them.

I don't like being manipulated anymore than women that complain about players do.
Why would I respond in a way that promotes the behavior?
 HUMHUMA
Joined: 1/14/2018
Msg: 24
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1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 6/7/2018 4:36:50 AM
#1 have never went on a first date expecting that nor have I ever had a woman expect it on the first date but in saying that if it ever happened I would probably Not go for it until I knew her which would probably never happen...lol
 SiennaBear2
Joined: 12/2/2017
Msg: 25
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1st date and she wants IT and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?
Posted: 6/7/2018 2:16:37 PM
No. It's cruel and missleading.
Someone did me on the first date and I took it to mean he liked me and he went really cold and ghosted me. Except it was worse because he waited till a few days later when I was going overseas then blocked me. I had no idea and was thinking about the jackass the whole time only to get back and discover that he blocked me on the day I left, weeks ago.
Don't be a jerk.
Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > 1st date and she wants "IT" and your not feeling her...do you do her anyway?