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Show ALL Forums  > Plentyoffish Site/Suggestions/Help  > Cannot message a user whose mail settings I appear to match? And rel      Home login  
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 NotElvisJunior
Joined: 6/8/2008
Msg: 1
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Cannot message a user whose mail settings I appear to match? And related Mail Settings questions..Page 1 of 1    
Ok, there are a few things that are confusing me.... but I've recently come back to POF after a hiatus of quite some time.

I notice that some users have their Mail Settings visible, and some do not - but I don't see a setting that allows me to make my mail settings visible/invisible (and I admit to not understanding why one would want to hide their filters).

Also, while the Mail Settings still have the ability to block people who're Looking For:
- Hang Out*
- Friendship*
- Activity Partner
- Dating*
- Long-term*
- Intimate Encounter
- Talk/E-mail
- Other Relationship

it appears that there's nowhere on my profile to set/unset some of these ie: "I am looking for..." with all those values - only the ones I've marked with asterisks are still listed...

Finally, and the big one . . I tried to send a message to a user - and her Mail Settings were visible, and set to:
To send a message to **** you MUST meet the following criteria:
Male
Age between 30 and 45.
Live in United States
Live within 75 miles.
Must not have messaged users looking for intimate encounters or sex.
You must have a picture to contact this user.
Must not be looking for Intimate Encounter
Must not be married

So I know I match all those criteria. Yet it responds with:
**** > accepts messages only from certain users. Why not message one of your Matches instead? Return to your inbox


What am I missing here?

Thanks in advance...
 gcdeb
Joined: 4/25/2011
Msg: 2
Cannot message a user whose mail settings I appear to match? And related Mail Settings questions..
Posted: 10/7/2013 8:21:16 PM

I notice that some users have their Mail Settings visible, and some do not - but I don't see a setting that allows me to make my mail settings visible/invisible (and I admit to not understanding why one would want to hide their filters).
I'm not aware of there ever being an option to hide your mail settings. It could be something new, although is it possible those people simply don't have any mail restrictions?


Also, while the Mail Settings still have the ability to block people who're Looking For:
- Hang Out*
- Friendship*
- Activity Partner
- Dating*
- Long-term*
- Intimate Encounter
- Talk/E-mail
- Other Relationship

it appears that there's nowhere on my profile to set/unset some of these ie: "I am looking for..." with all those values - only the ones I've marked with asterisks are still listed...
It is my understanding that all the non-asterisked options were removed several months ago when the site owner instigated several changes to clean up the site. If you are seeing profiles that still have those settings then I expect that means those settings were existing at the time of the changes and have been allowed to stay.


Finally, and the big one . . I tried to send a message to a user - and her Mail Settings were visible, and set to:
To send a message to **** you MUST meet the following criteria:
Male
Age between 30 and 45.
Live in United States
Live within 75 miles.
Must not have messaged users looking for intimate encounters or sex.
You must have a picture to contact this user.
Must not be looking for Intimate Encounter
Must not be married

So I know I match all those criteria. Yet it responds with:
**** > accepts messages only from certain users. Why not message one of your Matches instead? Return to your inbox
I can't give you a specific answer for this. It could be because of the 14 year age difference restriction that is now in place (although I thought that produced a different message). It could be because of various other hidden filters that exist or there could be another answer that someone with more knowledge than me can enlighten us with.

You could try a forum thread search (on the main page) for words such as "message restrictions" or "Mail settings" or "can't message" etc and I'm sure you will get hundreds of existing threads where you will likely find your answer.
 NotElvisJunior
Joined: 6/8/2008
Msg: 3
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Cannot message a user whose mail settings I appear to match? And related Mail Settings questions..
Posted: 10/12/2013 8:38:44 PM
Hmm, I'm not aware of having messaged anyone looking for "intimate encounter" - though I will admit that I quite often look at the "Intent" field, and quite often miss the "For" field...

Is there any way I can find out if I've triggered the "intimate encounters" threshold?
 OTTO BONN
Joined: 4/20/2006
Msg: 4
Cannot message a user whose mail settings I appear to match? And related Mail Settings questions..
Posted: 10/12/2013 9:32:09 PM
Is there any way I can find out if I've triggered the "intimate encounters" threshold?

I can help you with that. Try to send me a message. I have only that one restriction. If it gets sent, you have not been dealt the scarlet flag.

The "accepts messages only from certain users" system response is not the one for intimate encounters; "you are not allowed to message" is what you get once you've tripped that flag.
 forum_moderator
Joined: 1/24/2003
Msg: 5
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Cannot message a user whose mail settings I appear to match? And related Mail Settings questions..
Posted: 10/12/2013 11:09:02 PM




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