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Joined: 8/2/2014
Msg: 1
Random text of a picturePage 1 of 1    
Hey guys,

I recently hung out with someone at school a few times and it was hot and cold... The last night before our. Two week break I slept over and tried to ask him the next morning if he is interested in hanging out again with me, and said I rather you tell me if your not ... He claims he was but he got busy in the semester with tests and everything...

Anyway I sent him a text after saying I didn't mean to put him on the spot or give him the impression I'm after anything serious bc grad school is stressful and I ,eave for internship in oct but I do enjoy having fun with him... He never responded

A week latwr (two days ago) he sent me a picture of his fishing pole and the water... I never responded and dont know if I should or if the pic was intended for me...
Fishing is something we both like and have in common, if we were talking everyday I don't think it would have been weird but we haven't been...

So my question is guys have you ever sent a random picture to a girl that you were sort of interested in but maybe unsure how to communicate?

Because I get the feeling he likes me, but I just don't know!
Joined: 10/25/2012
Msg: 2
Random text of a picture
Posted: 8/30/2014 11:46:19 AM
It now appears that txtspk is too laborious and a pic is considered "communication."

There is another gal that made a thread about how she sends a text to some guy and he responds with a pic.

I think it's stupid, and I would never take anyone seriously who seemed to have no mastery of their native language.

But different strokes for different folks, OP!!
Joined: 6/3/2013
Msg: 3
Random text of a picture
Posted: 8/30/2014 1:34:03 PM
How exactly are you getting the feeling that he likes you? He's hot and cold, didnt respond to your message , hasnt been in contact and sent a pic that even you think he meant to send to someone else. This doesnt sound interested to me.
Joined: 6/27/2013
Msg: 4
Random text of a picture
Posted: 8/30/2014 3:53:02 PM
I'm guessing you mean he literally sent you a photo of a fishing rod, and are not saying "fishing pole" as a euphemism for the type of photo many women brag about receiving online!

CALL him now. Tell him about the photo and ask him if he intended to send it to you. If he meant to send it to a fishing buddy, he will be grateful. While on the phone, you two can talk about where you go from here.

Do not use your grad school status as an excuse not to interact. You college kids have all the time in the world, yet so many of you claim you're busy or don't have time. You'll see when you leave your ivory tower and join the real world!

I have never sent a completely random photo to a girl. Sometimes a girl and I will exchange photos of our pets early in the communication. I suppose my choice of pet photos are somewhat random because I have so many photos of my furbabies.
Joined: 2/25/2013
Msg: 5
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Random text of a picture
Posted: 8/30/2014 7:27:21 PM
I'd say it's just a conversation starter, or he's a visual guy and a picture is "worth a thousand words".

1) Hey, I'm fishing, you like? Come join me. Wish you were here.

2) This is me, this is my Zen.
Random text of a picture
Posted: 8/31/2014 11:24:22 AM

sort of interested in but maybe unsure how to communicate?

which person in this exchange are we talking about again?

consider that part of why you're confused may be your willingness to not only accept ambiguity, but to promote it.

tried to ask him the next morning if he is interested in hanging out again with me, and said I rather you tell me if your not .

this kind of backwards tiptoeing way of asking for a date, where it's more important to determine if he's NOT interested than if he is because you want to save face above all else, is doomed to failure, because no one is ever going to tell you 'no, i don't want to hang out with you' to your face. it's impolite. and when you approach someone so cautiously and elliptically, trying to say things by not saying them, any reply will confuse you, because vague indirectness is your standard. just look how you're trying to parse the hidden layers of meaning in a fishing pole.

here's a tip about communication in early courtship: anything that's not a yes is a no. that includes any use of 'maybe' and any excuse that doesn't come with an immediate counteroffer.
Joined: 4/8/2004
Msg: 7
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Random text of a picture
Posted: 8/31/2014 12:50:27 PM
My God.

The assumptions in the initial post are thicker than flies on a cow patty.

Hung out with a few times... hot and cold. WTF? You mean he wasn't trying to get down your pants 24/7, but you got the impression at times that he DID want to get down your pants? Is that what you call Hot and Cold? Or is it that sometimes he reacted like you wanted, and sometimes he didn't react like you wanted? You ask him for some kind of assurance that the relationship is going to get a little more serious... you wanted him to confirm he would be spending more time with you and that he would be MAKING more time for you... in other words, you wanted to advance to the next stage in your relationship... from the hookups of convenience, to being able to count on when you'd see him again.

See... here is where most people who post for advice fail. They post here because they have issues with honesty in communication... and they seek answers to confirm the course of action they have already chosen. I mean... look at this initial post. He is doing things you wouldn't do... so you don't think he likes you? Instead of examining his actions for what they are, you filter everything through what your desires are... except you aren't being very honest and forthcoming with what those desires are.

You try to come across like this is no big thing... no skin off your nose. You were just hanging out a few times, you just casually wanted to know if he was interested in hanging out more (and you really wanted to know either way if he wanted to hangout more, or otherwise to tell you he'd rather not), you sent him a text casually apologizing and reinforcing that this is all just a casual thing... you know.... trying REALLY hard to hook this guy without him knowing he got hooked... trying REALLY hard to leave him with the message you could almost care less about all of it, but you just don't want him to get the wrong impression.

Your question... has anyone ever sent a random picture to a girl that they were sort of interested in, but maybe unsure how to communicate? This has PROJECTION written all over it. That's not a good thing. You. Projecting. Projecting your own emotions and confusion, and pointing the finger at him. How can I say that?

You point out that you both love fishing. It is something you have in common. In what freaking universe does that make a picture of a fishing pole and water a RANDOM image? Come on... spit it out. Say the truth. You don't feel it is random at all. You know he sent you the picture because the both of you like fishing. You are just paranoid that he send you the picture representing the act of fishing, because he is accusing you of fishing for compliments or men or whatever. See... I spotted the fact that you wanted to hook him, and it might be possible that he has spotted your insecurities and sees that you are trying to hook him while making it look like you aren't... and that's why you can't figure out if the picture of the fishing pole and water was because you both like fishing, or because he sees you fishing for him.

You can't talk about THAT though... so you instead call it a random picture.

Also... who ever said he as unsure as to how to communicate? Just because YOU don't understand what he might be trying to say does not mean he doesn't know how to communicate. Again.... you are projecting your own communications issues onto him.

The thing is... people who understand communication at all, know that if you wanted to know why he sent you that picture, you would ask HIM why he sent that picture... instead of waiting days or weeks and asking a bunch of strangers what he meant.

You get the feeling he likes you, but you just don't know if he wants to jump into a relationship with you... because that's what you want from him... even though you believe if you TELL him that this is what you want he will run away.

Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 8
Random type of a relationship
Posted: 8/31/2014 2:14:22 PM
I see your saw his rod, but have no idea about how he master baits it.

the problem is, both of you are taking the easy path. Time for someone to nut up, and put the cards on the table, ready to accept success or failure as a result. you asked,he ducked...and you accepted that. if you like the idea of sorta being in a relationship, then sorta keep doing what you're doing. and obviously, use some erection protection for the deflection of infection, b/c if he can't say he sorta likes you, he sure can't tell you he sorta has a rash.

we only fix what's broken. so far, nothing's broken for him. you're going to have to break it for him, otherwise why buy the proverbial cow?
Joined: 5/13/2014
Msg: 9
Random type of a relationship
Posted: 9/1/2014 6:54:47 AM
You told him you were not looking for anything serious. You are the one that set the tone by defining the parameters. A week between communications for a hangout friendship is not a long time. Obviously he was thinking about you when he sent the pic. You should have responded instead of ignoring his attempt to start a conversation. You are sending him mixed signals and he many not know how to respond.
Joined: 9/18/2015
Msg: 10
Random text of a picture
Posted: 6/9/2017 8:27:13 AM
"So my question is guys have you ever sent a random picture to a girl that you were sort of interested in but maybe unsure how to communicate? "

No and not only that but I also stopped pulling pigtails to show interest a long, long, long time ago
Joined: 4/10/2016
Msg: 11
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Random text of a picture
Posted: 6/9/2017 10:36:38 AM
I agree with the group - the fishing pole is OBVIOUSLY a sexting pic. He just sent the wrong pic by accident. He's got lots of dic pics and just sent the wrong one. He's waiting for you to sext him back.

He does not want a date
He does not want to talk
He does not want to step it up, work it out, make it clear, or shut it down
He just wants a vague sext - even a pic from a random magazine, maybe a bra ad - that would be pretty vague.
Joined: 9/18/2015
Msg: 12
Random text of a picture
Posted: 6/9/2017 10:44:07 AM

I highly doubt that he is still waiting 3 years later

....but then again....I don't know him
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 13
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Posted: 6/14/2017 1:12:46 AM
He may not be waiting, but I bet she's still pondering if he's interested or not, LOL:)

POF encourages the rebirth of old threads, much to the dismay of other posters:)
Joined: 3/22/2016
Msg: 14
Random text of a picture
Posted: 6/14/2017 1:14:16 AM
Pof is worse you know cause I not on tinder.
Joined: 4/17/2016
Msg: 15
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Random text of a picture
Posted: 6/18/2017 7:23:27 AM
He could have been sending a subliminal message to help you get a grasp on how to hold his pole and how well he can dip that rod.
This, or it was meant for someone else. We shall never know and I imagine that three years later OP doesn't even think about the photo or the man's holy pole. I hope at 33 she has gained a bit more confidence and can see and communicate when she feels she is being avoided without asking 21 strangers. When a man avoids you, let him. They can smell desperate on a woman and it's pungent.
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