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 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 2
When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...Page 1 of 31    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31)
When women say there are no "decent" guys.Is what they really mean there are no extra good looking guys that will commit to them other than for a fling/one night stand?


Yes.

However, as you can see by the dearth of replies so far, you won't find an abundance of women to confirm that in writing.

Add-

Oh, I see now that it is a 2 forum post.(also in Ask a Girl)
 miss_ahab
Joined: 7/11/2014
Msg: 3
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When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/19/2014 1:52:18 PM
no not an abundance but i'll confirm in writing that "decent" can equal good looking. now im sure some women are able to overlook the lack of hotness if said dude's personality rocked, his intelligence was well above average and he of course was respectful.
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 4
When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/19/2014 3:29:41 PM
As stated in your other thread, many times this statement is said out of "frustration" and basically is venting. Not to be taken as a blanket statement about all men, from all women of this world. I don't like it hearing it, especially from the women that I know, and they usually get a raised eyebrow from me if they do happen to "vent" in front of me. They know they don't want to listen to me go into a long winded venting episode repeating generic shiat about the women of the world.

In fact, it's the last thing they wanna hear.

It could and would, go on forever.
 ozsealady1
Joined: 6/13/2013
Msg: 5
When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/19/2014 8:52:44 PM
We see and meet wonderful men who are charming, employed, doting husbands or boyfriends and we want that.
After a string of hopeful meetings with men who promise one thing and deliver something else it can get frustrating.

Hence some women will wonder if the saying ' all the good ones are married or gay' is true.
 Eric_Summit
Joined: 11/3/2009
Msg: 6
When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/19/2014 9:38:56 PM
My suggestion would be a visit to the Profile Reviews forum to see how things might be improved.
 basilisk123
Joined: 12/17/2011
Msg: 8
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When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/20/2014 6:31:04 AM
"Decent"is so vague, it is not even funny. That could mean anything from morality to financial to ween size.
It all matter on what they are looking for. Be it a romantic relationship or something they can use to plug a few holes. And women are not the only ones that can not find anything decent. Hell alot of guys, me included, couldn't find anything decent, until we just quit looking. Same goes for alot of women.
 Iam_RFSF2014
Joined: 9/4/2014
Msg: 9
When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/20/2014 11:53:34 AM
I was gonna give a 'smart alec' response and simply say 'No'.

But then I realized I don't know any one personally (outside of these forums and I don't know most of the women in these forums personally) who consistently says this (that there are no decent guys).

I know women who have been terribly hurt when their husband of 10, 15, 20+ years is unfaithful to them, when the marriage falls apart. I know women who just went through a breakup and/or are frustrated by a bad date or 3 and may express frustration 'argh! why can't I meet a nice guy?'

But mostly the women I know (myself and the ones above included) would tell you that they know lots of decent guys. They are their husband (or, heck, their ex-husband), they are their co-workers, friends, sons, brothers, dads, step-dads.

And many of these women are optimistic that they will meet a decent guy in the future, if they currently aren't involved with one.

I happy to say I recently met a decent guy - he's not extra good looking (and I'm sure he'd be fine with me saying that, he's said it himself, but - he's becoming more and more attractive TO ME as I get to know him), he's clearly not just interested in a one night stand (since we've had multiple dates), he's a normal guy and he's the OPPOSITE of a creep.

Let me guess OP - this is NOT what you were hoping to hear, was it? Either in this forum or the other one where you posted the same thing and already got your 21 max answers?
 Olympian2121
Joined: 9/21/2014
Msg: 10
When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/20/2014 6:49:44 PM
When women say that, its because they passed up a good guy to date some baller, and then after getting banged a few times , he left her for someone hotter and now shes mad and feels better thinking its the fault of all men.

*runs and hides.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 11
When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/20/2014 8:51:46 PM
Honestly it means "why are none of the decent men attractive (to me)?" or "why haven't any of the men I have been interested in so far and dated worked out for me?"

Whether she chose wrong or she just had a string of bad luck - the question remains the same.
 Onyxbutterflies90
Joined: 10/14/2014
Msg: 12
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When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/21/2014 12:45:45 PM
"Decent" = I'm interested in them and they are interested in me. I get to choose which traits are included in "decent" since I'm the one who has to date them. Lucky you, you also get to choose which traits exist under "decent" for you.
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 13
When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/22/2014 2:55:43 PM

Honestly it means "why are none of the decent men attractive (to me)?" or "why haven't any of the men I have been interested in so far and dated worked out for me?"


And between the lines it says "and you're not one of them."
 basilisk123
Joined: 12/17/2011
Msg: 14
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When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/22/2014 7:11:09 PM
^^^^
I have heard that silent line forever.

Female friend complains about guys not talking to her.
I really want to slap the back of her head and tell her "Am I not talking to you right now?"

I know what she means though. She means, No guys she is interested in are talking to her. Personally I think she is aiming way too high, but it's what she wants. (Shrug) I will just stand here and watch.
 hotdogshop100
Joined: 8/17/2014
Msg: 15
When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/23/2014 5:38:42 AM
I disagree. Women have all kinds of types they consider good looking. There is a big middle ground between George Clooney and Pee Wee Herman.
 Iam_RFSF2014
Joined: 9/4/2014
Msg: 16
When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/23/2014 8:32:10 AM
^^ lots of middle ground. LOTS

I have posted on this and several other threads that I (as an example of ONE woman) and women I know (as an example of several/many women who are not me) aren't only interested in looks, don't seek 'bad boys', do give nice guys a chance. Just as a counter point to the gloom and doom. I work at a university so I am in contact with women of ALL ages as well (not all oldsters like me).

But, almost always, those posts are met with ... crickets ... because that doesn't fit in with the victim mentality/blame game that the people posting on here want to believe in.

I'm currently getting to know/starting to 'date' a nice (decent), imperfect man my age who will likely not be confused with a movie star (hey! neither will I, so I say this in all fondness of him).
 ThatGirlNamedAlli
Joined: 12/28/2013
Msg: 17
When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/23/2014 9:11:21 AM
"When women say there are no "decent" guys.Is what they really mean there are no extra good looking guys that will commit to them other than for a fling/one night stand?"

Pretty much yep.

Any man or woman that says in their profile, "there are no decent guys/women.." or similar is a moron. Of course there are, tons. It's a good filter indicator to click next.
 a_djentleman
Joined: 8/11/2013
Msg: 18
When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/24/2014 3:23:51 AM
[QUOTE]^^ lots of middle ground. LOTS

I have posted on this and several other threads that I (as an example of ONE woman) and women I know (as an example of several/many women who are not me) aren't only interested in looks, don't seek 'bad boys', do give nice guys a chance. Just as a counter point to the gloom and doom. I work at a university so I am in contact with women of ALL ages as well (not all oldsters like me).

But, almost always, those posts are met with ... crickets ... because that doesn't fit in with the victim mentality/blame game that the people posting on here want to believe in.

I'm currently getting to know/starting to 'date' a nice (decent), imperfect man my age who will likely not be confused with a movie star (hey! neither will I, so I say this in all fondness of him).[/QUOTE]


Cool story, bro... or however they say it on the internet...

...but, yeah, it don't work like that...
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 19
When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/24/2014 5:11:10 AM
^^^There's a baseless, non factual, grammar free argument.

It DOES work like that for her cause she just told you it did. It may NOT work like that for YOU - and if so chances are there's something you can do about it if you want to. Pfft.

Anyhow - IME there are a LOT of decent guys out there, but dating factors have to fall into place. Someone has to be single, available, local, attractive (to whoever considers them), and a lot of other qualities have to line up for it to be more than "who's out there?"

It's never that simple.
 a_djentleman
Joined: 8/11/2013
Msg: 20
When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/25/2014 2:52:11 PM
'HER' as in being a woman. It doesn't work the same being a guy. Read some of the threads around there.
 Dee4166
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 21
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When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/26/2014 4:18:18 AM
Again...not ALL men/women...

I disagree equally strongly with women who generalize about men, as the reverse....

People are INDIVIDUALS and if/when I find myself generalizing about men that is when I KNOW that I need to either change my attitude or, take a break from dating....
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 22
When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/26/2014 5:20:01 AM

'HER' as in being a woman. It doesn't work the same being a guy. Read some of the threads around there.

BS. I refuse to believe one gender is having a worse time at this. It's all about the person and how they see it/what they do with it. Blaming it on the other gender is just easy and convenient.

if a woman says negative things about men she has a point if a man says negative things about women he has issues

No, they pretty much both have issues. Not sure where you've been hanging out but you may want to change your habits.
 loveisatemple
Joined: 3/28/2014
Msg: 23
When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/26/2014 5:55:35 AM
I don't know what a person who says that means, nor do I care. I click on. If a guy had that on his profile, I'd know he was bitter and unsuccessful at getting whatever it was he wanted AND now blames the world instead of looking at himself, perhaps revising some entitled feelings, expectations, presumptions and fantasies, to the reality of what is out there vs wishing the world would bend to his needs or wants.


and normal guys aren't good enough and get branded as "creeps" for doing nothing other than showing an interest in them.


I think your presumptions are what get you in trouble. What is normal--I guess it's a guy not "extra good looking". What makes you call that normal? It implies median looks to connote some balanced qualities, as if ordinary looks confer
a mentally healthy individual, and good looks =infidelity and other poor qualities. Not true.

Why are you interested in these women? They must be extra good looking, and not normal, therefore they are slutty and other poor qualities? You can close the loop in your thinking by choosing "normal" women.

Anytime someone's criteria excludes you, they must be Satan's devil child? They didn't like you overall as you presented yourself. It may have little to do with appearances. You are projecting your own "looks as the dominant criteria" onto women, and then acting offended like someone said you were ugly. More than likely, she rejected you as a whole and or simply liked someone more or was looking for someone else. Simply being online DOES NOT MEAN, she must pick anyone.

It's a supplemental tool to dating in real life. And, some people prefer NO ONE to the wrong one.
 Iam_RFSF2014
Joined: 9/4/2014
Msg: 24
When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/27/2014 6:31:49 AM

'HER' as in being a woman. It doesn't work the same being a guy. Read some of the threads around there.


Well, it was MY story that you said didn't ring true or it wasn't valid (I guess) because a female was telling it, except..... I wasn't gushing about how I was getting hundreds of emails and expected to meet a movie star who was an 8 when I was a 2, etc etc (the things that 'all women do' according to many threads).

I was telling a story about one MAN and one WOMAN. Both of us were on a dating site. Now we are seeing each other in real life.

It worked for me (a woman) but ............. it also worked for him (a guy).
 basilisk123
Joined: 12/17/2011
Msg: 25
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When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/27/2014 6:57:42 AM
^^^^
excellent point Iam.

It basically comes down to "bitter people are bitter"
People who had no success in the dating world with sometimes blame their own weaknesses on other people. If you can understand your weaknesses, you can do things to address them, if not, then you are just running away.

Of course I sound like a hypocrite because this is coming from someone who is bitter about life, but the difference is that I understand that my own failures was always my fault, not theirs.
 BelleAtlantic
Joined: 11/7/2012
Msg: 26
When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/27/2014 11:39:12 AM

When women say there are no "decent" guys.Is what they really mean there are no extra good looking guys that will commit to them other than for a fling/one night stand?and normal guys aren't good enough and get branded as "creeps" for doing nothing other than showing an interest in them.


I'm not sure what "decent" has to do with "extra good looking guys". I agree with branded as "creeps" for showing interest, but I'll revise it as "creeps for showing interest when it is clear the interest is not welcomed nor reciprocated".

I've met many decent men, I just haven't been attracted to them, they are too average and predictable. I'll define it, someone who is relationship material, has a stable job, their own place, has friends they hang out with, and has a predictable schedule. What's the problem with this set up? I'm not looking for an average life with someone, that's boring. I want to know what they do outside of all these normal activities, lol.

There has to be much more to life than doing the same damn thing all the time till the day we die.

Extremes are always unfavorable. Extremely good looking guy who can't f*ck to save his life, and average looking guy who can f*ck but can't find someone to f*ck, have the same ending and limitation: skill and no opportunity or opportunity but no skills. Someone who only wants to sleep with you (even when they can make a commitment), will result in eventually feeling used, not desired.
 BLoNDeANGeL845
Joined: 6/10/2014
Msg: 27
When women say there are no decent guys is what they really mean...
Posted: 10/27/2014 11:41:00 AM
We see and meet wonderful men who are charming, employed, doting husbands or boyfriends and we want that.
After a string of hopeful meetings with men who promise one thing and deliver something else it can get frustrating.

Hence some women will wonder if the saying ' all the good ones are married or gay' is true.


SORT OF THAT...

I also say: all that glitters is not gold...how many of those so-called charming men are : cheating, gay-in-the-closet, addicted to substances, narcissistic, work a holics, self-centered, etc?

employed--well that's the norm, but does it mean they are a master in their field?

doting- are they really, or is a show, cuz they r really cheating, or gay & married to a beard, or a suffocating control freak, or childish-ly needy?

Maybe those husbands/boyfriends promised & don't deliver either but their woman just pretends--or maybe he delivers, but she didn't have a list of demands when she met him...or maybe she looks like Pam Anderson, etc.

I think women (& men) say such things for a variety of reasons...an excuse for their single-ness, or they're overly picky, or no prize catch themself, or not pro-active enough, or they have been burned, or drive away prospective partners w/ excessive demands/needi-ness...

I say focus on urself- fun-etc. & the right person will show up sooner or later...

Before you pray for the arrival of the woman/man of your dreams, make sure you are the man/woman of someone else's
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