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 AUTHOR
 cutiejay1980
Joined: 10/21/2014
Msg: 1
profile review pleasePage 1 of 1    
Hello I'd just like to get a profile review I don't really know how my profile sounds I'm looking for a relationship so should I add more about me and what I'm about or more about what I'm looking for In someone are my pictures ok or should I take some down? maybe my profile Is good but that's why I'm asking, so If I could get a little help that would be great, thanks.
 oldfashmntman
Joined: 10/20/2009
Msg: 2
profile review please
Posted: 11/2/2014 6:44:04 PM
Hi OP, in a nutshell you have missed the mark, there is very little if anything of substance in the text.

Check out the profile tips at the top of the page in green, follow the guide lines, then post back to THIS thread and someone will help you tweak it.

Best wishes

Jerry
 gingersnapOH
Joined: 7/22/2014
Msg: 3
profile review please
Posted: 11/2/2014 7:07:48 PM
Most of your sentences are long, run on sentences. Break them up into small ones. It seems small, but it makes a huge difference.

Take out the part about games and drama.
 Forums_only
Joined: 7/20/2014
Msg: 4
profile review please
Posted: 11/2/2014 7:54:36 PM
Wow, you're cute as hell. That's a good thing. A better thing would be that great smile as your main from the shoulders up.

You missed the Interests field entirely. This is where you'd put Nascar, the Leafs (gag), Nandos, Mexico, Tragically Hip, Bacon, or whatever works for you. The Interests field can show personality and humour before she even gets to the profile, which is basically very.. basic.

You really are especially cute. Just sayin.... A little bit of info about your work will help you present as someone stable and reliable, which are good traits in a potential relationship partner. It's all very psychological.

First contact messages should be 3-4 sentences at most, specific to one topic in her profile, light humoured, and include one question so she has an easy way to respond IF she chooses. If no response, don't waste any energy wondering why.
 cutiejay1980
Joined: 10/21/2014
Msg: 5
profile review please
Posted: 11/3/2014 2:27:01 PM
OK I put a little more effort In my profile so how does It sound now and what should I change or take out?
 tennistown
Joined: 9/7/2011
Msg: 6
profile review please
Posted: 11/3/2014 3:04:26 PM

I don't really know how my profile sounds






....... I'm fairly honest. I'm a very sexual person but I'm not on here looking for sex or one night stands




^^^^ Alarm bells started ringing when you wrote this....


So, not just a sexual person
But.
a very sexual person.

This might be too much information too soon,
in the earliest stages of your dating introductions.
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 7
profile review please
Posted: 11/3/2014 3:07:45 PM
You changed your user name but didn't you have a long review thread not that very long ago?
 cutiejay1980
Joined: 10/21/2014
Msg: 8
profile review please
Posted: 11/3/2014 3:13:38 PM
Last time I had a long therad was In 2012 according to this and I'll take out the very before the sexual part I just wanted readers to know I'm not like a lot of guys on here who ask for sex IN their first message I think that ruins this site for guys like me who are really looking for someone
 cutiejay1980
Joined: 10/21/2014
Msg: 9
profile review please
Posted: 11/3/2014 4:44:53 PM
I'm a good guy just looking for a bit of help with my profile
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 10
profile review please
Posted: 11/3/2014 5:18:06 PM
I remember it and it wasn't 2012 Jasen.
You have spelling errors
No car is going to be a deal breaker for some so you have to bring your best game
Undecided about children?
But then you make mention of your height again.. so I scrolled up, as will she. Already stated so need need to highlight it further imo
You need one full body shot
Don't ask them to msg you, makes you sound needy.. we all know the Black and Decker
 Forums_only
Joined: 7/20/2014
Msg: 11
profile review please
Posted: 11/3/2014 6:26:04 PM
Still needed: Interests field, and punctuation.
 cutiejay1980
Joined: 10/21/2014
Msg: 12
profile review please
Posted: 11/13/2014 6:21:08 PM
Yes I know I mentioned my height but I read some thing about vin diesel that he gets his shoes custom made so It adds a few Inches to his height so I wear In soles In mine I feel more confident but If I really should delete It then I will and Yes No car Is a going to be a deal breaker but I was on here a few months earlier this year and put no I got a bunch of looks from skinny ones big ones average ones so I sent emails out even to women In my own city and not one reply back so I decided to put n/a I already have met one or two but do explain why I don't a lot of women are very judgemental on this site If you put no for a car they don't even bother to ask why you don't they just assume the worst I was on match for a year and a half and meet girls from Burlington Barry Toronto Niagara falls match doesn't ask that question and I'm undecided about kids because If I fall In love with someone who doesn't want kids they that's cool and vise versa and as for the pictures I have should some go?
 Forums_only
Joined: 7/20/2014
Msg: 13
profile review please
Posted: 11/13/2014 6:35:09 PM

profile review please
Posted: 11/3/2014 604 PM
Still needed: Interests field, and punctuation.



10 days later.. still stands. And JESUS, man, learn to use punctuation. You may be cute but your post gave me a brain tumor.
 cutiejay1980
Joined: 10/21/2014
Msg: 14
profile review please
Posted: 11/13/2014 6:50:32 PM
You should get that tumor looked at you could die from that:(
 cutiejay1980
Joined: 10/21/2014
Msg: 15
profile review please
Posted: 12/10/2014 6:35:23 AM
How does my profile sound now that I have Interests In It?
 Mark_It_Up
Joined: 3/15/2011
Msg: 16
profile review please
Posted: 12/10/2014 7:32:04 AM
It is full of cliche. This profile could be applied to virtually any guy on here. They are all easy going, a little shy at first, like sports, work out, enjoy the beach, friends and family, and animals. There is absolutely nothing to make you stand out from the crowd here.
 oldfashmntman
Joined: 10/20/2009
Msg: 17
profile review please
Posted: 12/10/2014 7:48:15 AM
Hi Jasen, the interests are okay, but definitely lose cuddling, it will set of many ladies creep alarm.


About Me


Go to edit profile and add your name.


Hi I'm Jasen and yes that's how you spell my name


Delete


I'm a pretty easy-going guy a little shy at first, but I quickly come out of my shell.


This is REALLY bad, why oh why do so many think easy going and shy are attractive traits?


I'm a big movie buff and I have a little collection of my own, I'm a big leafs fan and a few other sports, I have one tattoo so far and have thought about getting at least two or three more. I work out a few times a week, I also stay active by biking, walking through trails, I enjoy going to the beach and camp when I can. I'm a big world war 2 and history buff, I'm close with my friends and family and I like all animals.


The above varies from a re-hashing of the interests up above, VERY boring unless you have an interesting story to tell about a few. You need to refocus your thought process Jasen, do you REALLY think a woman is going to think OMG I have GOT to date him, he has a movie collection!? Family and friends is cliche and assumed, again VERY boring.

Delete the works.


I have a lot of great qualities


I am certain you do, THIS is what you need to refocus on, tell the ladies what they are! Delete


and I'm a bit little taller In person.


If there is one universal thing women eat up it is confidence, this shows a lack of. delete


I'm looking for an Intelligent,


There are MANY different forms of intelligence, personally, I do not like it used for that reason. As is no doubt some if not many may wonder if they are "intelligent" enough to meet your standards. My advice is to decide that from correspondence in your inbox, not the text of your profile.


confident


How do you like a woman to display her confidence?


who knows how to communicate and have fun


Assumed and goes without saying, totally worthless. delete


explore new adventures and can keep up mentally and physically


Too vague, what kind of adventures?


chemistry Is Important, honesty and who's laid back.


Painfully obvious, assumed, and cliche. delete

Have you seen the profile tips at the top of the page in green?

Best wishes

Jerry
 Ainen
Joined: 6/27/2013
Msg: 18
profile review please
Posted: 12/10/2014 7:48:49 AM
Movies and music are not good interests because they're too generic. It's a shame so many people misspell "mountain" to make it searchable.


I'm a bit little taller In person.


Not worded well, not sure what this means. Rounded down your height for your profile setting? Good posture, standing up straight? Shoes with a significant heel? I would suggest deleting this line and letting them find out you look taller when you meet in real life.


I'm looking for an Intelligent, confident women


If you're looking for just one, change the plural to singular.
 013552
Joined: 3/14/2009
Msg: 19
view profile
History
profile review please
Posted: 12/10/2014 8:42:55 AM
see you got interests but not sure its an American way to type it but to me its bonfire, one word not 2?
plus need you to clear something up for me,
whats (walk through trails) mean, i've often walked along them or up or down them
 tennistown
Joined: 9/7/2011
Msg: 20
profile review please
Posted: 12/10/2014 12:02:46 PM

How does my profile sound now








Education -- High School

Profession -- shipping


....... and can keep up mentally and physically,




So you're looking for Olga the smart Russian Shot putter?
If she's continually having to "keep up" , that sounds challenging.

It's a nice find when you meet
a lovely lady that's also plenty smart.

Yet, if you're holding out for a woman
that can best you in an arm wrestling contest,
you may have a much longer wait.

 tatersprout
Joined: 8/23/2013
Msg: 21
profile review please
Posted: 12/10/2014 12:04:33 PM
Jasen,

First off, you need better photos.
They are discolored and grainy.

Why would we question how you spell your name?

Women don't come here and say "Wow, it's so hard to find an easy going guy, wonder if he's laid back, too?".

Everything starts with "I".

Paragraphs according to subject. not one big one.
Grammar errors.

Take cuddling and romance from interests.

One paragraph describing you, your personality, one about what you do for fun. She wants an idea what it's like to date you.
 Forums_only
Joined: 7/20/2014
Msg: 22
profile review please
Posted: 12/10/2014 11:25:22 PM
I get the name spelling thing - you probably get asked a lot if it's misspelled, so it's a cute icebreaker if you use an exclamation mark. Same with the height comment- I got it, someone else may also appreciate the subtle humour. I vote to leave those both in. But I may be biased because of the dazzling smile. Maybe.
 CTRLvector
Joined: 9/21/2014
Msg: 23
profile review please
Posted: 12/10/2014 11:57:07 PM
Why would you say you were a "pretty loyal guy," that is a horrible choice in adverb. Other than that, its pretty boring.
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