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 AUTHOR
 OneKewlDood
Joined: 5/21/2014
Msg: 1
TinderPage 1 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
I don't get it. Is it a hookup app, or a dating app? It connects to Facebook, but is there a way to customize what it says or does it only read your "About Me" line from your Facebook profile? There literally seems to be people of all age ranges, but it's entirely 100% superficial and I'm not sure that's a good thing.
 TrustInKarma
Joined: 12/26/2014
Msg: 2
Tinder
Posted: 1/8/2015 7:26:27 PM
TInder is great. Allows you to only get contacted from people you're interested in. After that, it's up to you to decide if it's a hookup app or a dating app. I had one date off Tinder, and he was nice, but not my cup of tea. I use it mainly when I'm bored, and talk to a few people now and then, but haven't met anybody that has knocked me off my socks.
 OtisGreening
Joined: 12/8/2014
Msg: 3
Tinder
Posted: 1/8/2015 7:38:06 PM
Allows you to only get contacted from people you're interested in


Yes, that's what I like about it too!

Also, since it connects to FB, you can see if you share mutual friends or interests with the people you see on Tinder. It can be a dating or hookup app but that depends on you and how you chose to use it.
 northwildwoodnjman1969
Joined: 9/18/2012
Msg: 4
Tinder
Posted: 1/9/2015 9:41:27 AM
Had my 1st date off Tinder last week. Met a really nice lady. Not sure if we go out again or not, but at least it got me a date. I plan on continuing to use it.
 Eternityboresme
Joined: 8/20/2014
Msg: 5
Tinder
Posted: 1/10/2015 7:20:30 AM
I would not fare well, with that app.

I'm happy to not that it works well, for others.
 JoeBnD
Joined: 3/23/2012
Msg: 6
Tinder
Posted: 1/10/2015 9:06:24 AM
I was on Tinder for less than an hour, then found out it was for 50 and under. Bye-bye app.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 7
Tinder
Posted: 1/10/2015 9:43:59 AM
I had a friend that was using Tinder. He told me that he got a few dates from it. But many of his matches never responded him after he had contacted them. Not much different than what can happen here. A person sends you an email. You respond to it and never hear from that person again.
 Ainen
Joined: 6/27/2013
Msg: 8
Tinder
Posted: 1/10/2015 9:49:45 AM
Can anyone answer the OP's query about the site's connection to Facebook? If you want your Tinder photo to be different from your regular Facebook photos, can you make a different Tinder photo? For example, on Facebook you might have pictures of family members including children. Might not want a stranger on Tinder to see family photos. On Facebook a young man might have "cool" photos where he's looking like a tough guy / "gangster" for his Facebook buddies, but might want a pleasant, approachable photo for the girls on Tinder to see.
 forumfellathesequel
Joined: 7/28/2014
Msg: 9
Tinder
Posted: 1/10/2015 9:53:21 AM
Sounds like a great app and idea, but like most of the date sites, it's all about location, unless you enjoy long drives
 TrustInKarma
Joined: 12/26/2014
Msg: 10
Tinder
Posted: 1/10/2015 9:55:23 AM

But many of his matches never responded him after he had contacted them. Not much different than what can happen here. A person sends you an email. You respond to it and never hear from that person again.


Yes, that happens, but no different than other online dating sites. I'm guilty of that, because I just get overwhelmed with too many matches. When I first started after a friend told me about it, I wasn't really taking it seriously and just when on a spree of left and right swiping, almost like hot or not. It was fun to see that most of the guys I liked also liked me. I was sitting there with my friend having lunch and just swiping away and then cheering every time I had a "match", like it was a game. And then these guys actually messaged me and it got to be too much to respond. I've reigned it in now, I'm not going solely by pic anymore, but by distance as well. I've had to turn down several dates because they are just too far away from me. Too bad, but that's just how it is.

Anyways, I love Tinder and I'll continue to use it for the time being.
 jessebunnies
Joined: 2/18/2013
Msg: 11
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History
Tinder
Posted: 1/10/2015 9:58:08 AM

I don't get it. Is it a hookup app, or a dating app?

All of these sites are "hookup apps". I found POF to be the worst but that's just my opinion. I think most people no matter what site they are using (especially males) are looking for easy sex or wouldn't be opposed to it. In other words you get what you make out of it.


but is there a way to customize what it says or does it only read your "About Me" line from your Facebook profile?

The only info it takes from your Facebook is your first name, your age and there's a section on the bottom that will let others know if you have Facebook friends and interests in common. There's a very small section you can create for you "about me" section. Most people write a couple of sentences. Not much different then most of the POF profiles commonly seen on here.


but it's entirely 100% superficial and I'm not sure that's a good thing.

Is it any different then looking at pictures at POF and deciding you want to write to that person? That's what most people do! There's not much else to go on online. Most written portions of profiles are BS anyway false "I'm a great father who loves his kids" which really turns out to be "I'm a sh!tty father who abandoned my children to go play with a 22 year old and now the state is trying to take everything I own to cover back child support".

I use Tinder almost exclusively for dating. I've meet some really great men on there who treat me well. I like that there has to be mutual attraction to write to one another, saves both of us a lot of time and frustration and I also love the fact that my first date is spent actually getting to know a person rather than trying to figure out what was bullsh!t from the profile and what was not.


If you want your Tinder photo to be different from your regular Facebook photos, can you make a different Tinder photo?

Yes you can use ANY of your Facebook photos but they have to be posted on Facebook in order to load them up onto Tinder. In other words you can't just save a stolen Google image of a male model without first loading it into your Facebook photos. But yes you can swap any photos you have posted. I believe Tinder gives your 4 or 5 photos.
 TrustInKarma
Joined: 12/26/2014
Msg: 12
Tinder
Posted: 1/10/2015 10:00:58 AM

also love the fact that my first date is spent actually getting to know a person rather than trying to figure out what was bullsh!t from the profile and what was not.


Haha, no shit. That is definitely a plus in my book. And thanks for introducing me to Tinder jessie ;-)
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 13
Tinder
Posted: 1/10/2015 10:16:11 AM
Most written portions of profiles are BS anyway false "I'm a great father who loves his kids" which really turns out to be "I'm a sh!tty father who abandoned my children to go play with a 22 year old and now the state is trying to take everything I own to cover back child support".


Profiles aren't always accurate. But profiles can serve a purpose. Sometimes I wasn't interested in an attractive woman because of something written in her profile. Long list of rigid requirements, negative profile about previous dating experiences or men in general etc. Plus some people may only be interested in dating a person without kids, from the same religion etc. That type of info is often present in a profile.


Yes you can use ANY of your Facebook photos but they have to be posted on Facebook in order to load them up onto Tinder. In other words you can't just save a stolen Google image of a male model without first loading it into your Facebook photos. But yes you can swap any photos you have posted. I believe Tinder gives your 4 or 5 photos.


A person can hide photos of another person on their FB account by making that album(s) visible only to themselves. Having said that, I think the more likely scenario for dishonesty is some people using their older FB photos on Tinder.
 jessebunnies
Joined: 2/18/2013
Msg: 14
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History
Tinder
Posted: 1/10/2015 11:03:28 AM

A person can hide photos of another person on their FB account by making that album(s) visible only to themselves. Having said that, I think the more likely scenario for dishonesty is some people using their older FB photos on Tinder.

Yes that's very true. You can upload photos to FB and not have them run through your newsfeed and make the photo/album private to your own view. Nothing is fool proof. People can also make fake Facebook accounts. And I wasn't suggesting that they don't. In my experience the average scammer doesn't go to that much work but occasionally they do.

I wasn't suggesting that dishonesty doesn't happen on Tinder. I was merely answering the posters above question where he was more concerned that Tinder would automatically upload pictures of him and his kids or pictures he didn't want shown on Tinder not suggesting that Tinder is safe from the pitfalls of every other online service.
 SunshineGirl__
Joined: 10/7/2014
Msg: 15
Tinder
Posted: 1/10/2015 11:35:40 AM

also love the fact that my first date is spent actually getting to know a person rather than trying to figure out what was bullsh!t from the profile and what was not.


I know nothing about Tinder and I don’t understand this. How can you know a guy is legit from Tinder as opposed to dating sites?
 Eternityboresme
Joined: 8/20/2014
Msg: 16
Tinder
Posted: 1/10/2015 12:35:08 PM
^^one doesn't.
 Blackwood85
Joined: 5/20/2013
Msg: 17
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Tinder
Posted: 1/10/2015 12:44:44 PM
Tinder has the reputation of being an hookup app but it's not, it's another dating app that people tend to use for hookups, I think Tinder is trying to change that reputation, I know they had a "Swap right night" with the Atlanta Hawks. Tinder uses your FB pictures but you choose which pictures Tinder uses. It's suppose to help prevent fake profiles but I've ran into a few fakes ones.

I've heard people call POF and OKC hook-up sites too so I necessarily wouldn't go off on what you've been told.
 tall_fit
Joined: 12/13/2014
Msg: 18
Tinder
Posted: 1/10/2015 2:33:45 PM
I know nothing about Tinder and I don’t understand this. How can you know a guy is legit from Tinder as opposed to dating sites?


You don't know. I prefer meeting and dating people in the real world where I can often get to know people over time instead of Tinder or POF.
 jessebunnies
Joined: 2/18/2013
Msg: 19
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History
Tinder
Posted: 1/10/2015 4:02:48 PM

How can you know a guy is legit from Tinder as opposed to dating sites?

You don't on any site. However there is less
"I'm a great father" but reality is he hasn't seen his kids in 10 years
"I love to work out" but reality is he hasn't stepped foot in a gym New Years resolution 20o2
"I hike, fish and camp" but reality is he hasn't done those things since Boy Scouts elementary school.

Anyone can make themselves look good on paper it's much harder to do that in real life.

One of the biggest drawbacks I've found with online dating is that there is HUGE expectations going into a first date from both sides. A lot of that comes from profile writing. Your expecting a guy who works out and sadly disappointed when he's got a beer belly. Your expecting a guy who like to hike and camp and your upset when you find out he hasn't done those since childhood. You saw a guy whose profile said he was 6'2" and now your pizzed that he's only 5'7" with shoes. You expecting a guy who said he wanted a relationship and now your done with dating when you find out he's only there to hook up.

None of these expectations would be set up if they hadn't been written in the first place. With Tinder there isn't much you can write therefore, in my opinion, it mirrors real life more so then the rest of the sites do. Your forced to go into a date getting to know someone story instead of already knowing a BS story. You have to ask questions. You have to listen and interact much the same way you do if you were to meet someone at a bar, club, gym or grocery store. The only commonality you have is that your physically attracted to one another same as real life.

I've found that people are less apt to fake who they really are in person to your face. It happens all day long on paper though....we're all super hero's in writing....
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 20
Tinder
Posted: 1/10/2015 5:39:56 PM

I wasn't suggesting that dishonesty doesn't happen on Tinder. I was merely answering the posters above question where he was more concerned that Tinder would automatically upload pictures of him and his kids or pictures he didn't want shown on Tinder not suggesting that Tinder is safe from the pitfalls of every other online service.


Okay. I understand. We are on the same page with this particular point.
 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 21
view profile
History
Tinder
Posted: 1/14/2015 12:52:59 PM
Although I’ve been a strong advocate of Tinder and similar dating sites/apps because their efficiency and civility is far greater than sites like POF that don’t establish attraction prior to communication (very few wasted first contact messages!), it sure has been a grand lesson in humility.

I’ve had Tinder for about a year and have undoubtedly “swiped right” to thousands of women during that time (I find 95%+ women on that thing attractive) but have less than ten matches to show for it, so I’m batting like 0.01% -- and some of those matches turned out to be spam bots trying to get me to go to another (usually porn) site.

Tinder is the closest thing to a pure attraction gauge that probably exists. You have basically no information to go on except for an age (which isn’t even available on competitor Hot Or Not) and pictures. You can only search by age and location. Every decision you make or is made about you is based entirely on physical attraction. By far my biggest negative on most dating sites, including POF, is my height. On Tinder, you can’t search/browse by height, and none of my pictures on there have me with other people, so it’s basically impossible to tell how tall I am. So unlike on here, Match, OKC, eH, women cannot possibly be rejecting me (directly or indirectly) because of my height. (They CAN reject me because of my ethnicity, but not prior to seeing my pictures, whereas on other dating sites, they can exclude me from searches for that reason.)

Therefore, my 99.99% failure rate on Tinder has to be entirely because of lack of facial/body attraction.

One day last year I was in the editing booth with my white, very good-looking (according to nearly all women I know) male director around the time he first got on Tinder, and he kept having to check his phone every couple of minutes because he kept getting “new match” notifications from his earlier swiping activity – he must have checked it like two dozen times during the couple of hours I was there and he said he had so many matches he couldn’t even keep track of all the communication that was going on. Now he’s probably an extreme example for a male, but any male of average attractiveness should get hundreds of matches from “swiping right” to thousands of women (if he swiped right to as many women as I did, he’d probably end up with thousands of matches).

What this tells me about myself is that I’m an EXTREMELY unattractive individual face-wise (since my body is athletic) – and that apparently I have bigger problems on POF than height, ethnicity, questionable profile, questionable intro messages, marital status (never married at 40ish = bad), drinking status, children status, occupation, etc. I’ve never really thought of myself as being truly “ugly” before, and I’ve had (very minor) success with women both in OLD and real life, but all that is the distant past. Strangely, I look almost exactly the same I did then, but the age range of women interested in someone my age is obviously higher and now women my age (the few that are left in this game of musical chairs) probably want a guy that looks older and more mature, instead of some guy their age with Peter Pan syndrome.

At least, that is the only explanation I can come up with as to why I’ve "become ugly." Regardless, the statistics do unfortunately support the conclusion, if not the theories behind it: I am now one of the ugliest men on the face of the earth. Or at least on Tinder and Hot Or Not.

Thanks, Tinder.
 OtisGreening
Joined: 12/8/2014
Msg: 22
Tinder
Posted: 1/14/2015 7:22:40 PM
One of the major pluses of Tinder is you don't have to give your phone number in order to communicate quickly. You're already chatting with the person in an IM fashion on your phone. I've had guys set up dates and then I meet them without having to exchange numbers (only after our date and if we wish to remain in contact).
 aj7125
Joined: 11/28/2014
Msg: 23
Tinder
Posted: 1/14/2015 8:20:24 PM
If Tinder is great and you type words and meet without actually TALKING to someone, it wouldn't be for me.

I get it when profiles can be BS! So I guess I would have to understand that Tinder is also something you speak to someone before you meet. If it is just a picture and written messages, that is the same as online dating profiles, you can believe what is said, but you really really haven't a clue if you don't hear a voice and what they say before you meet. I know it still isn't a guarantee but I have talked to women on the phone and decided I wasn't interested in meeting them.

Maybe I don't get tinder:p
 Onyxbutterflies90
Joined: 10/14/2014
Msg: 24
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History
Tinder
Posted: 1/14/2015 8:36:41 PM

At least, that is the only explanation I can come up with as to why I’ve "become ugly." Regardless, the statistics do unfortunately support the conclusion, if not the theories behind it: I am now one of the ugliest men on the face of the earth. Or at least on Tinder and Hot Or Not.


Do you smile in the pictures on Tinder? Teeth showing smile, not a lip smile. Few people look attractive with lip smiles. Unfortunately you look middle eastern, but aren't middle eastern which may work against you. Middle eastern men get the fewest replies last I read.

I wouldn't say you're ugly at all. Maybe you're just in the wrong city. I couldn't find a suitable guy until I expanded my search to include the entire U.S. I met my guy online hundred of miles away and he moved here to be with me after dating for a year.

I have friends who've tried Tinder and they like it. It's only a hook-up site if you hook-up with the guys you meet on dates. Otherwise, its just like any other dating site.
 VolkanoKing
Joined: 8/1/2014
Msg: 25
Tinder
Posted: 1/15/2015 12:28:29 AM
I just downloaded it to see how it works.

Are these people's Facebook profile photos? I am seeing the exact same lousy, fuzzy, blurry "creepy" type photos, bathroom mirror shots, etc. These look no different than anything on OKC@upid, this site or any other site.

Flipping thru the picture with my thumb, I feel like I'm looking thru a bad pack of playing cards.
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